REJUVENAT: 

OF 

AUNT  MARY 


-ANNE  -WARNER- 


"  The  carriage  stopped  three  hundred  feet  below  the  level  of  a  roof-garden." 
FRONTISPIECE. 


THE 

REJUVENATION 

OF 

AUNT    MARY 


BY 

ANNE   WARNER 

AUTHOR  OF  "  SUSAN  CLEGG  AND  HER  FRIEND  MRS.  LATHROP,' 
"A  WOMAN'S  WILL,"  ETC. 


With  Four  Full-page  Illustrations 


BOSTON 
LITTLE,  BROW.N,  AND  COMPANY 

1907 


Copyright,  1904, 
BY  AINSLEE  MAGAZINE  COMPANY. 

Copyright,  1905, 
BY  LITTLE,  BROWN,  AND  COMPANY. 


All  rights  reserved 


Published  October,  1905 


ALFRED  MUDGE  &  SON,  INC.,  PRINTERS, 
BOSTON.  MASS..  U.  S.  A. 


CONTENTS 


CHAPTER  PAGE 

I.  INTRODUCING  AUNT  MARY 1 

II.  JACK 14 

III.  INTRODUCING  JACK 24 

IV.  MARRIED 35 

V.  THE  DAY  AFTER  FALLING  IN  LOVE 45 

VI.  THE  OTHER  MAN 57 

VII.  DEVELOPMENTS 67 

VIII.  THE  RESOLUTION  HE  TOOK 71 

IX.  THE  DOWNFALL  OF  HOPE 75 

X.  THE  WOES  OF  THE  DISINHERITED 87 

XL  THE  DOVE  OF  PEACE     .   *. 99 

XII.  A  TRAP  FOR  AUNT  MARY 115 

XIII.  AUNT  MARY  ENTRAPPED 128 

XIV.  AUNT  MARY  EN  FETE 138 

XV.  AUNT  MARY  ENTHRALLED 159 

XVI.  A  REPOSEFUL  INTERVAL 189 

XVII.  AUNT  MARY'S  NIGHT  ABOUT  TOWN 207 

XVIII.  A  DEPARTURE  AND  A  RETURN 225 

v 


vi  CONTENTS 

CHAPTER  PAGE 

XIX.  AUNT  MARY'S  RETURN 233 

XX.  JACK'S  JOY       244 

XXI.  THE  PEACE  AND  QUIET  OF  THE  COUNTRY   .    .    .  263 

XXII.  "GRANITE" 277 

XXIII.  "GRANITE"— Continued 283 

XXIV.  Two  ARE  COMPANY 289 

XXV.  GRAND  FINALE               315 


ILLUSTRATIONS 

From  Drawings  by  The  Decorative  Designers 

The  carriage  stopped  three  hundred  feet  below 

the  level  of  a  roof-garden  "    .....   Frontispiece 


1 1  ( 


Do  not  let  us  play  any  longer,'  she  said.     '  Let 
us  be  in  earnest  '  "   ........      P&ge    69 


<  She  's  goin'  to  the  city  all  alone  !  '  Luanda's 

voice  suddenly  proclaimed  behind  him"       .         "124 

;  'Yesterday  I  played  poker  until  I  didn't  know 

a  blue  chip  from  a  white  one'  '  '    .     .     .     .        ««     291 


The  Rejuvenation  of 
Aunt  Mary 

Chapter  One 

INTRODUCING  AUNT   MARY 

i  HE  first  time  that  Jack  was  threatened 
with  expulsion  from  college  his  Aunt 
Mary  was  much  surprised  and  decidedly 
vexed — mainly  at  the  college.  His  family  were 
less  surprised,  viewing  the  young  man  through  a 
clearer  atmosphere  than  his  Aunt  Mary  ever  had, 
and  knowing  that  he  had  barely  escaped  similar 
experiences  earlier  in  his  career  by  invariably  leav- 
ing school  the  day  before  the  board  of  inquiry 
convened. 

Jack's  preparatory  days  having  been  more  or 
less  tempestous,  his  family  (Aunt  Mary  ex- 
cepted)  had  expected  some  sort  of  after-clap  when 
he  entered  college.  Nevertheless,  they  had  fer- 
vently hoped  that  it  would  not  be  quite  as  bad  as 
this. 

Jack's  sister  Arethusa  was  visiting  her  aunt 
when  the  news  came.  Not  because  she  wanted  to, 
for  the  old  lady  was  dreadfully  deaf  and  fearfully 


2       REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

arbitrary,  but  because  Lucinda  had  said  that  she 
must  go  to  her  cousin's  wedding,  and  the  family 
always  had  to  bow  to  Luanda's  mandates.  Lu- 
cinda was  Aunt  Mary's  maid,  but  she  had  become 
so  indispensable  as  a  sitter  at  the  off-end  of  the 
latter's  ear-trumpet  that  none  of  the  grand-nephews 
or  grand-nieces  ever  thought  for  an  instant  of  cross- 
ing one  of  her  wishes.  So  it  was  to  Arethusa  that 
the  explanations  due  Aunt  Mary's  interest  in  her 
scapegrace  fell,  and  she  bowed  her  back  to  the 
burden  with  the  resignation  which  the  circum- 
stances demanded. 

"  Whatever  is  the  difference  between  bein'  ex- 
pelled and  bein'  suspended? "  Aunt  Mary  de- 
manded, in  her  tone  of  imperious  impatience. 
"Well,  why  don't  you  answer?  I  was  brought 
up  to  speak  when  you're  spoken  to,  an'  I'm  a 
great  believer  in  livin'  up  to  your  bringin'  up — 
if  you  had  a  good  one.  What's  the  difference, 
an'  which  costs  most?  That's  what  I  want  to 
know.  I  do  wish  you'd  answer  me,  Arethusa; 
there's  two  things  I've  asked  you  now,  an'  you 
suckin'  your  finger  an'  puttin'  on  your  thimble  as 
if  you  were  sittin'  alone  in  China." 

"  I  don't  know  which  costs  most,"  Arethusa 
shrieked. 

"  You  needn't  scream  so,"  said  Aunt  Mary. 
"  I  ain't  so  hard  to  hear  as  you  think.  I  ain't 


INTRODUCING   AUNT   MARY  3 

but  seventy,  and  I'll  beg  you  to  remember  that, 
Arethusa.  Besides,  I  don't  want  to  hear  you  talk. 
I  just  want  to  hear  about  Jack.  I'm  askin'  about 
his  bein'  expelled  and  suspended,  an'  what's  the 
difference,  an'  in  particular  if  there's  anything 
to  pay  for  broken  glass.  It's  always  broken  glass ! 
That  boy's  bills  for  broken  glass  have  been  some- 
thin'  just  awful  these  last  two  years.  Well,  why 
don't  you  answer?  " 

"  I  don't  know  what  to  answer,"  Arethusa 
screamed. 

"What  do  you  suppose  he's  done,  anyhow?" 

"  Something  bad." 

Aunt  Mary  frowned. 

"  I  ain't  mad,"  she  said  sharply.  "  What  made 
you  think  I  was  mad?  I  ain't  mad  at  all!  I'm 
just  askin'  what's  the  difference  between  bein'  ex- 
pelled an'  bein'  suspended,  an'  it  seems  to  me  this 
is  the  third  time  I've  asked  it.  Seems  to  me  it  is." 

Arethusa  laid  down  her  work,  drew  a  mighty 
breath,  very  nearly  got  into  the  ear-trumpet,  and 
explained  that  being  suspended  was  infinitely  less 
heinous  than  being  expelled,  and  decidedly  less 
final. 

Aunt  Mary  looked  relieved. 

"  Oh,  then  he's  gettin'  better,  is  he?  "  she  said. 
"  Well,  I'm  sure  that's  some  comfort." 

And  then  there  was  a  long  pause,  during  which 


4       REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

she  appeared  to  be  engaged  in  deep  reflection, 
and  her  niece  continued  her  embroidery  in  peace. 
The  pause  endured  until  a  sudden  sneeze  on  the 
part  of  the  old  lady  set  the  wheels  of  conversation 
turning  again. 

"  Arethusa,"  she  said,  "  I  wish  you'd  go  an' 
get  the  ink  an'  write  to  Mr.  Stebbins.  I  want 
him  to  begin  to  look  up  another  college  with  good 
references  right  away.  I  don't  want  to  waste  any 
of  the  boy's  life,  an'  if  bein'  suspended  means 
waitin'  while  the  college  takes  its  time  to  consider 
whether  it  wants  him  back  again  or  not  I  ain't  goin' 
to  wait.  I'm  a  great  believer  in  a  college  education, 
but  I  don't  know  that  it  cuts  much  figure  whether 
it's  the  same  college  right  through  or  not.  Any- 
way, you  write  Mr.  Stebbins." 

Arethusa  obeyed,  and  the  authorities  having 
seen  fit  to  be  uncommonly  discreet  as  to  the  cause 
of  the  young  man's  withdrawal,  no  great  diffi- 
culty was  experienced  in  finding  another  campus 
whereon  Aunt  Mary's  pride  and  joy  might  freely 
disport  himself.  Mr.  Stebbins  threw  himself  into 
the  affair  with  all  the  tact  and  ardor  of  an  expe- 
rienced legal  mind  and  soon  after  Lucinda's  re- 
turn to  her  home  allowed  Arethusa  to  follow  suit, 
the  hopeful  younger  brother  of  the  latter  became 
a  candidate  for  his  second  outfit  of  new  sweaters 
and  hat  bands  that  year. 


INTRODUCING   AUNT   MARY  5 

Aunt  Mary  wrote  him  a  letter  upon  the  occa- 
sion of  his  new  start  in  life,  Mr.  Stebbins  delivered 
him  a  lecture,  and  things  went  smoothly  in  con- 
sequence for  three  whole  weeks.  I  say  three 
whole  weeks  because  three  whole  weeks  was  a 
long  time  for  the  course  of  Jack's  life  to  flow 
smoothly.  At  the  end  of  a  fortnight  affairs  were 
always  due  to  run  more  rapidly  and  three  weeks 
produced,  as  a  general  thing,  some  species  of 
climax. 

The  climax  in  this  case  came  to  time  as  usual 
his  evil  genius  inciting  the  young  man  to  attempt, 
one  very  dark  night,  the  shooting  of  a  cat  which 
he  thought  he  saw  upon  the  back  fence.  Whether 
he  really  had  seen  a  cat  or  not  mattered  very  little 
in  the  later  development  of  the  matter.  He  was 
certainly  successful  as  far  as  the  going  off  of  the 
gun  was  concerned,  but  the  damage  that  resulted, 
resulted  not  to  any  cat,  but  to  the  arm  of  a  next- 
door's  cook,  who  was  peacefully  engaged  in  tak- 
ing in  her  week's  wash  on  the  other  side  of  the 
fence.  The  cook  ceased  abruptly  to  take  in  the 
wash,  the  affair  was  at  once  what  is  technically 
termed  looked  into,  and  three  days  later  Jack 
became  the  defendant  in  a  suit  for  damages. 

Naturally  Mr.  Stebbins  was  at  once  notified 
and  he  had  no  choice  except  to  write  Aunt  Mary. 

Aunt  Mary  was  somewhat  less  patient  over  the 


6       REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

third  escapade  than  she  had  been  with  the  first 
two. 

The  letter  found  her  alone  with  Lucinda  and 
she  read  it  to  herself  three  times  and  then  read  it 
aloud  to  her  companion.  Lucinda,  whose  thor- 
ough knowledge  of  the  imperious  will  and  imper- 
vious eardrums  of  her  mistress  rendered  her,  as  a 
rule,  extremely  monosyllabic,  not  to  say  silent, 
vouchsafed  no  comment  upon  the  contents  of  the 
epistle,  and  after  a  few  minutes  Aunt  Mary  her- 
self took  the  field: 

"  Now,  what  do  you  suppose  possessed  that  boy 
to  shoot  at  a  cook?  "  she  asked,  regarding  the 
letter  with  a  portentous  frown.  "  Cooks  are  so 
awful  hard  to  get  nowadays.  I  don't  see  why 
he  didn't  shoot  a  tramp  if  he  had  to  shoot  some- 
thin'." 

"  He  wa'n't  tryin'  to  shoot  a  cook,  'pears  like," 
then  cried  Lucinda — Luanda's  voice,  be  it  said, 
en  passant,  was  of  that  sibilant  and  penetrating 
timbre  which  is  best  illustrated  in  the  accents  of  a 
steamfitter's  file — "  'pears  like  he  was  tryin'  for 
a  cat." 

"Not  a  bat,"  said  her  mistress  correctively; 
"  it  was  a  cat.  You  look  at  this  letter  an'  you'll 
see.  And,  anyway,  how  could  a  man  shootin'  at 
a  cat  hit  a  cook? — not  'nless  she  was  up  a  tree 
birds'-nestin'  after  owls'  eggs.  You  don't  seem 


INTRODUCING   AUNT   MARY  7 

to  pay  much  attention  to  what  I  read  to  you, 
Lucinda;  only  I  should  think  your  common-sense 
would  help  you  out  some  when  it  comes  to  a  boy 
you've  known  from  the  time  he  could  walk,  an' 
a  strange  cook.  But,  anyhow,  that's  neither  here 
nor  there.  The  question  that  bothers  me  is,  what's 
to  pay  with  this  damage  suit?  I  think  myself 
five  hundred  dollars  is  too  much  for  any  cook's 
arm.  A  cook  ain't  in  no  such  vital  need  of  two 
arms.  If  she  has  to  shut  the  door  of  the  oven 
while  she's  stirrin'  somethin'  on  the  top  of  the 
stove,  she  can  easy  kick  it  to  with  her  foot.  It  won't 
be  for  long,  anyway,  and  I'm  a  great  believer  in 
making  the  best  of  things  when  you've  got  to." 

Lucinda  screwed  up  her  face  and  made  no  com- 
ment. Lucinda's  face  in  repose  was  a  cross 
between  a  monkey's  and  a  peanut;  screwed  up,  it 
was  particularly  awful,  and  always  exasperated 
her  mistress. 

''  Well,  why  don't  you  say  somethin',  Lucinda? 
I  ain't  askin'  your  advice,  but,  all  the  same,  you 
can  say  anything  if  you've  got  a  mind  to." 

"  I  ain't  got  a  mind  to  say  anythin',"  the  faith- 
ful maid  rejoined. 

"  I  guess  you  hit  the  nail  on  the  head  that 
time,"  said  Aunt  Mary,  without  any  unnecessary 
malevolence  concealed  behind  her  sarcasm;  then 
she  re-read  the  note  and  frowned  afresh. 


8       REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Five  hundred  dollars  is  too  much,"  she  said 
again.  "  I'm  going  to  write  to  Mr.  Stebbins  an' 
tell  him  so  to-night.  He  can  compromise  on  two 
hundred  and  fifty,  just  as  well  as  not.  Get  me 
some  paper  and  my  desk,  Lucinda.  Now  get  a 
spryness  about  you." 

Lucinda  laid  aside  her  work  and  forthwith  got 
a  spryness  about  her,  bringing  her  mistress'  writ- 
ing-desk with  commendable  alacrity.  Aunt  Mary 
took  the  writing-desk  and  wrote  fiercely  for  some 
time,  to  the  end  that  she  finally  wrote  most  of  the 
fierceness  out  of  herself. 

"  After  all,  boys  will  be  boys,"  she  said,  as  she 
sealed  her  letter,  "  and  if  this  is  the  end  I  shan't 
feel  it's  money  wasted.  I'm  a  great  believer  in 
bein'  patient.  Most  always,  that  is.  Here,  Lu- 
cinda you  take  this  to  Joshua  and  tell  him  to 
take  it  right  to  mail.  Be  prompt,  now.  I'm  a 
great  believer  in  doin'  things  prompt." 

Lucinda  took  the  letter  and  was  prompt.  "  She 
wants  this  letter  took  right  to  the  mail,"  she  said 
to  Joshua,  Aunt  Mary's  longest-tried  servitor. 

'  Then  it'll  be  took  right  to  mail,"  said  Joshua. 

"  She's  pretty  mad,"  said  Lucinda. 

'*  Then  she'll  soon  get  over  it,"  replied  the 
other,  taking  up  his  hat  and  preparing  to  depart 
for  the  barn  forthwith. 

Lucinda  returned  to  Aunt  Mary  with  a  species 


INTRODUCING   AUNT   MARY  9 

of  dried-up  sigh.  One  is  not  the  less  a  slave 
because  one  has  been  enslaved  for  twenty  years, 
and  Lucinda  at  moments  did  sort  of  peek  out 
through  her  bars — possibly  envying  Joshua  the 
daily  drives  to  mail  when  he  had  full  control  of 
something  that  was  alive. 

Lucinda  had  been,  comparatively  speaking, 
young  when  she  had  come  to  wait  upon  the  pleas- 
ure  of  the  Watkins  millions,  and  her  waiting  had 
been  so  pertinent  and  so  patient  that  it  had  en- 
dured over  a  quarter  of  a  century.  Aunt  Mary 
had  been  under  fifty  in  the  hour  of  Lucinda's 
dawn;  she  was  over  seventy  now.  Jack  hadn't 
been  born  then;  he  was  in  college  now;  and  Jack's 
older  brothers  and  sisters  and  his  dead-and-gone 
father  and  mother  had  been  living  somewhere  out 
West  then,  quite  hopeful  as  to  their  own  lives  and 
quite  hopeless  as  to  the  stern  old  great-aunt  who 
never  had  paid  any  attention  to  her  niece  since 
she  had  chosen  to  elope  with  the  doctor's  repro- 
bate son.  Now  the  father  and  mother  were  dead 
and  buried,  the  brothers  and  sisters  reinstated  in 
their  rights  and  had  all  grown  up  and  become 
great  credits  to  the  old  lady,  whose  heart  had 
suddenly  melted  at  the  arrival  of  five  orphans  all 
at  once.  And  there  was  only  Jack  to  continue  to 
worry  about. 

Jack  was  not  anything  particularly  remarkable; 


10     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

he  was  just  one  of  those  lovable  good-for-nothings 
that  seem  born  to  get  better  people  into  trouble 
all  their  lives  long.  He  had  been  spoiled  origi- 
nally by  being  ten  years  younger  than  the  next 
youngest  in  the  family;  and  then,  when  the 
children  had  been  shipped  on  to  Aunt  Mary's 
tender  mercies,  Jack  had  won  her  heart  imme- 
diately because  she  accidentally  discovered  that  he 
had  never  been  baptized,  and  so  felt  fully  jus- 
tified in  re-naming  him  after  her  own  father  and 
having  the  name  branded  into  him  for  keeps  by 
her  own  religious  apparatus.  It  followed  natu- 
rally that  John  Watkins,  Jr.,  Denham,  for  so 
her  father's  daughter  had  insisted  that  her  young- 
est nephew  should  be  called,  was  the  favorite 
nephew  of  his  aunt. 

And  it  was  lucky  for  him  that  he  was  the  favo- 
rite, for  Aunt  Mary,  who  was  highly  spiced  at 
fifty,  became  peppery  at  sixty,  and  almost  biting 
at  seventy.  And  yet  for  Jack  she  would  sign 
checks  almost  without  a  murmur.  Mr.  Stebbins 
was  much  more  censorious  and  impatient  with  the 
young  man  than  she  ever  was ;  and  to  all  the  rest  of 
the  world  Mr.  Stebbins  was  an  urbane  and  agree- 
able gentleman,  whereas  to  all  the  rest  of  the  world 
Aunt  Mary  was  a  problem  or  a  terror.  But  Mr. 
Stebbins  needed  to  be  a  man  of  tact  and  manage- 
ment, for  he  was  the  real  manager  of  that  for- 


INTRODUCING   AUNT   MARY  11 

tune  of  which  "Mary,  only  surviving  child  of 
John  Watkins,  merchant  and  ship  owner,"  was  the 
legal  possessor;  and  so  tactful  was  Mr.  Stebbins 
that  he  and  his  powerful  client  had  never  yet 
clashed,  and  they  had  been  in  close  business  rela- 
tions for  almost  as  many  years  as  Lucinda  had 
been  established  on  the  hearthstone  of  the  Wat- 
kins  home.  Perhaps  one  reason  why  Mr.  Steb- 
bins endured  so  well  was  that  he  had  a  real  talent 
for  compromising,  and  that  he  had  skillfully 
transformed  Aunt  Mary's  inherited  taste  for  driv- 
ing a  bargain  into  an  acquired  pleasure  in  what  is 
really  a  polite  form  of  the  same  action. 

So,  when  it  came  to  the  matter  of  Jack's  diffi- 
culties, Mr.  Stebbins  could  always  find  a  half-way 
measure  that  saved  the  situation;  and  when  he 
received  the  letter  as  to  the  cook  and  her  claim 
he  hied  himself  to  the  city  at  once,  and  wrote  back 
that  the  claim  could  be  settled  for  three  hundred 
dollars. 

"  And  enough,  I  must  say,"  Aunt  Mary  re- 
marked to  Lucinda  upon  receipt  of  the  statement; 
"  three  hundred  dollars  for  one  cat — for,  after 
all,  Jack  blames  the  whole  on  the  cat,  an'  he  didn't 
hit  it,  even  then." 

Lucinda  did  not  answer. 

"  But  if  the  boy  settles  down  now  I  shan't  mind 
payin'  the  three — Where  are  you  goin'?  " 


12     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

For  Lucinda  was  walking  out  of  the  room. 

"  I'm  goin'  to  the  door,"  said  she  raspingly. 
"  The  bell's  ringin'." 

After  a  minute  or  two  she  came  back. 

"  Telegram !  "  she  announced,  handing  the  yel- 
low envelope  over. 

Aunt  Mary  put  on  her  glasses,  opened  it,  and 
read: 

Cook  has  blood  poison.  Sues  for  a  thousand. 
Probable  amputation.  STEBBINS. 

Aunt  Mary  dropped  the  paper  with  a  gasp. 

Lucinda  looked  at  her  with  interest. 

"  It's  that  same  arm  again,"  said  Aunt  Mary, 
"just  as  I  thought  it  was  settled  for!"  Her 
eyes  seemed  to  fairly  crackle  with  indignation. 
"  Why  don't  she  put  it  in  a  sling  an'  have  a  little 
patience?  " 

Lucinda  took  the  telegram  and  read  it. 

"  'Pears  like  she  can't,"  she  commented,  in  a 
tone  like  a  buzz  saw;  "'pears  like  it's  goin'  to 
be  took  off." 

Aunt  Mary  reached  forth  her  hand  for  the 
telegram  and  after  a  second  reading  shook  her 
head  in  a  way  that,  if  her  companion  had  been  a 
globe-trotter,  would  have  brought  matadores  and 
Seville  to  the  front  in  her  mind  in  that  instant. 

"  I  declare,"  she  said,  "  seems  like  I  had  enough 


INTRODUCING   AUNT   MARY  13 

on  my  mind  without  a  cook,  too.  What's  to  be 
done  now  ?  I  only  know  one  thing !  I  ain't  goin' 
to  pay  no  thousand  dollars  this  week  for  no  arm 
that  wasn't  worth  but  three  hundred  last  week. 
Stands  to  reason  that  there  ain't  no  reason  in  that. 
I  guess  you'd  better  bring  me  my  desk,  Lucinda; 
I'm  goin'  to  write  to  Mr.  Stebbins,  an'  I'm  goin' 
to  write  to  Jack,  and  I'm  goin'  to  tell  'em  both 
just  what  I  think.  I'm  goin'  to  write  Jack  that 
he'd  better  be  lookin'  out,  and  I'm  goin'  to  write 
to  Mr.  Stebbins  that  next  time  he  settles  things 
I  want  him  to  take  a  receipt  for  that  arm  in  full." 

The  letters  were  duly  written  and  Mr.  Steb- 
bins, upon  the  receipt  of  his,  redoubled  his  efforts, 
and  did  succeed  in  permanently  settling  with  the 
cook,  the  arm  being  eventually  saved.  Aunt 
Mary  regarded  the  sum  as  much  higher  than 
necessary,  but  still  pleasantly  less  than  that  de- 
manded of  her,  and  so  life  in  general  moved  quietly 
on  until  Easter. 

But  Easter  is  always  a  period  of  more  or  less 
commotion  in  the  time  of  youth  and  leads  to 
various  hilarious  outbreaks.  Jack's  Easter  took 
him  to  town  for  a  "  little  time,"  and  the  "  little 
time  "  ended  in  the  station-house  at  three  o'clock 
on  Sunday  morning. 

Accusation:  Producing  concussion  of  the  brain 
on  a  cab  driver. 


Chapter  Two 

JACK 

THE  news  was  conveyed  to  Aunt  Mary 
through  private  advices  from  Mr.  Steb- 
bins    (who  had  been   hastily  summoned 
to  the  city  for  purposes  of  bail)  ;  she  was  very 
angry  indeed,  this  time — primarily  at  the  indig- 
nity done  her  flesh   and  blood  by   arresting   it. 
Then,   as  she  re-read  the  lawyer's  letter,   other 
reflections  crowded  to  the  fore  in  her  mind. 

"  Funny !  Whatever  could  have  made  the  boy 
get  up  and  go  downtown  at  three  in  the  morning, 
anyway  ?  "  she  said.  "  Seems  kind  of  queer,  don't 
you  think,  Arethusa  ?  Do  you  suppose  he  was 
ill  and  huntin'  for  a  drug  store  ?  " 

Arethusa  had  been  sent  for  the  second  day 
previous  because  Luanda's  youngest  sister's  young- 
est child  had  come  down  with  scarlet  fever,  and  the 
family  wanted  Lucinda  to  enliven  the  quarantine. 
Arethusa  had  sent  invitations  out  for  a  dinner 
party,  but  she  had  recalled  them  and  hastened  to 
obey  the  summons.  It  was  an  evil  hour  forher,  for 

14 


JACK  15 

she  loved  her  brother  and  was  mightily  distressed 
at  the  bad  news. 

"  I  don't  believe  he  can  have  been  ill,"  she  said, 
at  the  top  of  her  voice;  "if  he'd  been  ill  he 
wouldn't  have  had  the  strength  to  hit  the  cab 
driver  so  hard." 

"  I  don't  blame  him  for  hittin'  the  cab  driver," 
said  Aunt  Mary  warmly.  "  As  near  as  I  can 
recollect,  I've  often  wanted  to  do  that  myself. 
But  I  can't  make  out  where  he  got  the  man  to  hit, 
or  why  he  was  there  to  hit  him.  I  can't  make 
rhyme  or  reason  out  of  it.  I  wish  we  knew  more. 
Well,  I  presume  we  will,  later." 

Her  surmise  was  correct.  They  knew  much 
more  later.  They  knew  more  from  Mr.  Steb- 
bins,  and  they  knew  profusely  more  from  the 
evening  papers. 

"  I  think  our  boy'd  better  have  come  home  for 
his  Easter,"  Aunt  Mary  remarked,  with  a  species  of 
angry  undertow  threading  the  current  of  her 
speech.  "  There's  no  sayin'  what  this  will  cost 
before  we're  done  with  it." 

Arethusa  choked;  it  was  all  so  very  terrible 
to  her. 

"  What  is  it  that  the  cabman  wants,  anyhow?  " 
her  aunt  demanded  presently. 

"  He  doesn't  want  anything,"  yelled  the  un- 
happy sister.  "  He's  going  to  die." 


16     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Well,  who  is  going  to  sue  me,  then?  " 

"  It's  his  wife ;  she  wants  five  thousand  dollars 
damages." 

Aunt  Mary's  lips  tightened. 

"  Five  thousand  dollars !  "  she  said,  with  a  bit- 
ter patience.  "  I  can  see  that  this  is  goin'  to  be  an 
awful  business.  Five  thousand  dollars!  Dear, 
dear!  I  must  say  that  that  wife  sets  a  pretty 
high  price  on  her  husband — at  least,  a'cordin'  to 
my  order  of  think'm',  she  does.  From  what  I've 
seen  of  cabmen,  I'd  undertake  to  get  her  another 
just  as  good  for  a  tenth  of  the  money,  any  day." 

Arethusa  was  silent,  staring  thoughtfully  at  the 
newspaper  cuts  of  a  great  Tammany  leader  and 
a  noted  pugilist,  which  had  been  labeled  as  the 
principals  in  the  family  tragedy. 

Aunt  Mary  turned  over  another  of  the  many 
papers  received,  and  scanned  its  sensational  col- 
umns afresh. 

"  Arethusa,"  she  exclaimed  suddenly,  "  do  you 
know,  I  bet  anythin'  I  know  what  this  editor 
means  to  insinuate?  It  just  strikes  me  that  he's 
tryin'  to  give  the  impression  that  our  boy's  been 
drinkin'." 

"  Perhaps  so,"  Arethusa  screamed. 

"Well,  I  don't  believe  it,"  said  Aunt  Mary 
firmly,  "  and  I  ain't  goin'  to  believe  it.  And  I 
ain't  goin'  to  pay  no  five  thousand  dollars  for  no 


JACK  17 

cabman's  brains,  neither.  You  write  to  Mr.  Steb- 
bins  to  compromise  on  two  or  maybe  three." 

She  stopped  and  bit  her  lips  and  shook  her 
head.  "  I  don't  see  why  Jack  grows  up  so  hard," 
she  murmured,  half  in  anger  and  half  in  sorrow. 
"  Edward  and  Henry  never  had  such  times.  Oh, 
well,"  she  sighed,  "boys  will  be  boys,  I  suppose; 
an'  if  this  all  results  in  the  boy's  settlin'  down 
it'll  be  money  well  spent  in  the  end,  after  all. 
Maybe — probably — most  likely." 

The  days  that  followed  were  anxious  days,  but 
at  last  the  cabman  rallied  and  concluded  not  to 
die,  and  Jack  went  off  yachting  with  a  light  heart 
and  a  choice  collection  of  good  advice  from  Mr. 
Stebbins  and  Aunt  Mary. 

Nothing  happened  to  mar  his  holiday.  He  ran 
a  borrowed  steam  launch  on  to  some  rocks  with 
rather  heavy  consequences  to  his  aunt's  exchequer, 
and  returned  from  the  West  Indies  so  late  that 
she  never  had  a  visit  from  him  at  all  that  summer; 
but,  barring  these  slightly  unwelcome  incidents, 
he  did  remarkably  well,  and  when  he  returned  to 
college  in  the  fall  he  was  regarded  as  having 
become,  at  last,  a  stable  proposition. 

"  I  wonder  whether  our  boy's  comin'  home  for 
Christmas?  "  Aunt  Mary  asked  her  niece,  Mary, 
as  that  happy  period  of  family  reunions  drew  near. 
Mary  had  come  up  to  stay  with  her  aunt  while 


18     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Lucinda  went  away  to  bury  a  second  cousin.  Mary 
was  very  different  from  Arethusa,  having  a  voice 
that,  when  raised,  was  something  between  an  icicle 
and  a  steam  whistle,  and  a  temperament  so  much 
on  the  order  of  her  aunt's  that  neither  could  abide 
the  other  an  hour  longer  than  was  absolutely  neces- 
sary. But  Arethusa  had  a  sprained  ankle,  so  there 
was  no  help  for  existing  circumstances. 

"  No,  he  isn't,"  said  Mary,  who  had  no  patience 
at  all  with  her  brother,  and  showed  it.  "  He's 
going  West  with  the  glee  club." 

"  With  the  she  club !  "  cried  poor  Aunt  Mary, 
in  affright. 

Mary  explained. 

"  I  don't  like  the  idea,"  said  the  old  lady,  shak- 
ing her  head.  "  Somethin'  will  be  sure  to  happen. 
I  can  feel  it  runnin'  up  and  down  my  bones  this 
minute." 

"  Oh,  if  he  can  get  into  trouble,  of  course,  Jack 
will,"  said  Mary  cheerfully. 

Aunt  Mary  didn't  hear  her,  because  she  didn't 
raise  her  voice  particularly.  Besides,  the  old  lady 
was  absorbed  for  the  nonce  in  the  most  dismal  sort 
of  prognostications. 

And  they  all  came  true,  too.  Something  unfor- 
tunate beyond  all  expectations  came  to  pass  during 
the  glee  club's  visit  to  Chicago,  and  the  result  was 
that,  before  the  new  year  was  well  out  of  its  mcu- 


JACK  19 

bator  Jack  had  papers  in  a  breach-of-promise  suit 
served  on  him.  He  wrote  Mr.  Stebbins  that  it  was 
all  a  joke,  and  had  merely  been  a  portion  of  that 
foam  which  a  train  of  youthful  spirits  are  apt  to 
leave  in  their  wake;  but  the  girl  stood  solid  for  her 
rights,  and,  as  she-  had  never  heard  from  her 
fiance  since  the  night  of  the  dance,  her  family — 
who  were  rural,  but  sharp — thought  it  would  take 
at  least  fifteen  thousand  dollars  to  patch  the  crack 
in  her  heart.  If  the  news  could  have  been  kept 
from  Aunt  Mary  until  after  Mr.  Stebbins  had 
looked  into  the  matter,  everything  might  have  re- 
sulted differently.  But  the  Chicago  lawyer  who 
had  the  case  took  good  care  that  the  wealthy  aunt 
knew  all  as  quickly  as  possible,  and  it  seemed  as  if 
this  was  the  final  straw  under  which  the  camel 
must  succumb. 

And  Aunt  Mary  did  appear  to  waver. 

"  Fifteen  thousand  dollars !  "  she  cried,  aghast. 
"  Heaven  help  us !  What  next  ?  " 

It  was  Lucinda  who  was  seated  calmly  opposite 
at  this  crisis. 

"  Do  you  suppose  he  really  did  it?"  the  aunt 
continued,  after  a  minute  of  appalled  considera- 
tion. 

"  It's  about  the  only  thing  he  ain't  never  done," 
the  tried  and  true  servant  answered,  her  tone  more 
gratingly  penetrative  than  ever. 


20     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Aunt  Mary  eyed  her  sharply,  not  to  say 
furiously. 

"  I  wish  you'd  give  a  plain  answer  when  I  ask 
you  a  plain  question,  Lucinda,"  she  said  coldly. 
"If  you'd  ever  got  a  breach-of-promise  suit  in  the 
early  mail  you'd  know  how  I  feel.  Perhaps — 
probably." 

"  I  ain't  a  doubt  but  what  he  done  it,"  Lucinda 
screamed  out;  "  an'  if  I  was  her  an'  he  wouldn't 
marry  me  after  sayin'  he  would  I'd  sue  him  for  a 
hundred  thousand,  an'  think  I  let  him  off  cheap 
then." 

Aunt  Mary  deigned  to  smile  faintly  over  the 
subtlety  of  this  speech;  but  the  next  minute  she  was 
frowning  blacker  than  ever. 

"  A  girl  from  Kalamazoo,  too,  just  up  in 
Chicago  for  a  week — just  up  in  Chicago  long 
enough  to  come  down  on  me  for  fifteen  thousand 
dollars." 

"  Maybe  she'll  take  five  thousand  instead,"  Lu- 
cinda remarked. 

"Maybe!"  ejaculated  her  mistress,  in  fine 
scorn.  "  Maybe !  Well,  if  you  don't  talk  as  if 
money  was  sweet  peas  an'  would  dry  up  if  it  wasn't 
picked!" 

Lucinda  screwed  up  her  face. 

Aunt  Mary  gave  her  one  awful  look. 

"  You    get    me    some    paper    an'    my    desk, 


JACK  21 

Lucinda,"  she  said.  "  I  think  it's  about  time  I  was 
takin'  a  hand  in  it  myself.  I've  been  pretty 
patient,  an'  I  don't  see  as  it's  helped  matters  any. 
Now  I'm  goin'  to  write  that  boy  a  letter  that'll 
settle  him  an'  his  cats,  an'  his  cooks,  an'  his  cabmen, 
an'  his  Kalamazoo,  just  once  for  all.  I  guess  I  can 
do  what  I  set  out  to  do.  Pretty  generally — most 
always." 

Lucinda  brought  the  desk,  and  Aunt  Mary 
frowned  fearfully  and  began  to  write  the 
letter. 

It  developed  very  strongly.  As  her  pen  sized 
up  the  situation  in  black  and  white,  the  old  lady 
seemed  to  realize  the  iniquities  of  the  case  more 
and  more  plainly;  and  as  the  letter  grew  her  wrath 
grew  also.  The  whole  came,  in  the  end,  to  a  threat 
— made  in  good  earnest — to  take  a  very  serious 
step  indeed  if  any  more  "  foolishness  "  developed. 

Aunt  Mary  prided  herself  on  her  granite-like 
will.  She  had  full  faith  in  her  ability  to  slay  her 
nearest  and  dearest  if  it  seemed  right  and  best  to 
do  so. 

She  sealed  her  letter  tight,  stuck  the  stamp 
on  square  and  hard,  and  bid  Lucinda  convey  it  to 
Joshua  and  tell  him  never  to  quit  it  until  he  saw  it 
safe  on  to  the  evening  train. 

"  She's  awful  mad  at  him  for  sure,  this  time," 
said  Lucinda  after  she  had  delivered  her  message, 


22     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

and  while  Joshua  was  considering  the  front  and 
back  of  the  letter  with  a  deliberateness  born  of  long 
servitude. 

"  I  sh'd  think  she  would  be,"  he  said. 

As  nearly  all  of  Jack's  private  difficulties  were 
printed  in  every  newspaper  in  America,  Joshua 
naturally  was  on  the  inside  of  all  their  history. 

"  She  scrinched  up  her  face  just  awful  over  that 
letter,"  Lucinda  continued.  "  I'm  sure  I  wish 
he'd  'a'  been  by  to  'a'  taken  warnin'." 

"  He  ain't  got  nothin'  to  really  fret  over," 
said  Joshua  serenely;  "  he  knows  it,  'n'  I  know  it, 
'n'  you  know  it,  too." 

"  You  don't  know  nothin'  of  the  sort,"  said  Lu- 
cinda. "  She's  madder'n  usual  this  time.  She's 
good  an'  mad.  You  mark  my  words,  if  he  goes 
off  on  a  'nother  spree  this  spring  he'll  get  cut  out  o' 
her  will."  . 

Joshua  laughed. 

"  You  mark  my  words !  "  rasped  Lucinda,  shak- 
ing her  finger  in  witchlike  warning. 

Joshua  laughed  again. 

"  Them  laughs  best  what  laughs  last,"  said  Aunt 
Mary's  handmaiden.  She  turned  away,  and  then 
returned  to  give  Joshua  a  look  that  proved  that  the 
peppery  mistress  had  inculcated  some  cayenne  into 
the  souls  of  those  about  her.  "  You  mark  my 
words — them  laughs  best  what  laughs  last,  an' 


JACK  23 

there'll  be  little  grinnin'  for  him  if  he  ain't  a  chalk- 
walker  for  one  while  now." 

Joshua  laughed. 

But,  as  a  matter  of  fact,  Jack's  situation  was  sud- 
denly become  extremely  precarious. 

"  There  ain't  no  sense  in  it,"  said  Aunt  Mary  to 
herself,  with  an  emphasis  that  screwed  her  face  up 
until  she  looked  quite  like  Lucinda;  "that  life 
those  young  men  lead  on  their  little  vacations  is 
to  blame  for  everything.  Cities  are  wells  of 
iniquity;  they're  full  of  all  kinds  of  doin's  that 
respectable  people  wouldn't  be  seen  at,  and  I'm 
proud  to  say  that  I  haven't  been  in  one  myself  for 
twenty-five  years.  I'm  a  great  believer  in  keepin' 
out  of  trouble,  an'  if  Jack'd  just  stuck  to  college 
an'  let  towns  go,  he'd  never  have  met  the  cabman 
and  the  Kalamazoo  girl,  an'  I'd  have  overlooked 
the  cook  an'  the  cat.  As  it  is,  my  patience  is  done. 
If  he  goes  into  one  more  scrape  he'll  be  done  too. 
I  mean  what  I  say.  So  my  young  man  had  better 
take  warnin'.  Probably — most  likely — pretty 
certainly." 


INTRODUCING    JACK 

IT  has  been  previously  stated  that  Aunt  Mary's 
nephew,  Jack,  was  a  scapegrace,  and  as  delight- 
ful as  scapegraces  generally  are.     It  goes  with- 
out saying  that  he  was  good-looking;  and  of  course 
he  must  have  been  jolly  and  pleasant  or  he  wouldn't 
have  been  so  popular.     As  a  matter  of  fact,  Jack 
.    was  very  good-looking,  unusually  jolly,  and  un- 
commonly popular.     He  was  one  of  the  best  liked 
men  in  each  of  the  colleges  which  he  had  attended. 
•  There  was  something  so  winning  about  his  smile 
and  his  eternal  good  humor  that  no  one  ever  tried 
to  dislike  him;  and  if  anyone  ever  had  tried  he  or 
she  would  not  have  succeeded  for  very  long.     It 
is  probably  very  unfortunate  that  the  world  is  so 
full  of  this  type  of  young  man,  but  that  which 
should  cause  us  all  to  have  infinite  patience  with 
them  is  the  reflection  of  how  much  more  unfortu- 
nate it  would  be  if  they  were  suddenly  eliminated 
from  the  general  scheme  of  things. 

Like  all  college  boys,  Jack  had  a  chum.     The 
chum  was  Robert  Burnett,  another  charming  young 

24 


INTRODUCING   JACK  25 

fellow  of  one-and-twenty,  whose  education  had 
been  so  cosmopolitan  in  design  and  so  patriotic  in 
practice  that  he  always  said  "  Sacre  bleu  "  and 
"  Donnerwetter "  when  he  thought  of  it,  and 
"  Great  Scott  "  when  he  didn't  He  and  Jack  were 
as  congenial  a  pair  as  ever  existed,  and  they  had 
just  about  as  much  in  common  as  the  aunt  of  the 
one  and  the  father  of  the  other  had  had  to  pay  for. 

In  the  February  of  the  year  of  which  I  write, 
Washington,  celebrating  his  birthday  as  usual,  gave 
all  American  students  their  usual  chance  to  cele- 
brate with  him.  Celebrations  were  temptations 
incarnate  to  Jack,  and  he  was  feeling  frowningly 
what  a  clog  Aunt  Mary's  latest  epistle  was  upon 
his  joys,  when  his  friend  came  to  the  rescue  with  an 
invitation  to  spend  the  double  holiday  (it  doubled 
that  year — Sunday,  you  know)  at  the  brand-new 
ancestral  castle  which  Burnett  pere  had  just  finished 
building  for  his  descendants.  It  may  be  imagined 
that  Jack  accepted  the  invitation  with  alacrity,  and 
that  his  never-very-downcast  heart  bounded  glee- 
fully higher  than  usual  over  the  prospect  of  two 
days  of  pleasure  in  the  country. 

It  is  not  necessary  to  state  where  the  castle  of 
the  Burnetts  was  erected,  but  it  was  in  a  beautiful 
region,  and  the  monthly  magazines  had  written  it 
up  and  called  it  an  architectural  triumph.  The 
owner  fully  agreed  with  the  monthly  magazines, 


26     REJUVENATION  .OF   AUNT   MARY 

and  his  pride  found  vent  in  a  house-warming  which 
filled  every  guest  chamber  in  the  place. 

The  festivities  were  in  full  swing  before  the 
youngest  son  and  his  friend  arrived;  and  when 
the  dog-cart,  which  brought  them  from  the  station, 
drew  up  under  the  mighty  porte-cochere  with  its 
four  stone  lions,  rampant  in  four  different  direc- 
tions, Jack  felt  one  of  those  delicious  thrills  which 
run  through  one  under  particularly  hopeful  and 
buoyant  circumstances. 

"  It's  like  walking  in  a  novel,"  his  friend  said; 
as  they  entered  under  some  heavy  draperies  which 
the  footman  pushed  aside  and  found  a  tiny  spiral 
staircase,  which  wound  its  way  aloft  in  a  style  that 
Jack  liked  immensely  and  the  latter  agreed  with  all 
his  heart. 

The  staircase  led  them  to  the  third  floor  and 
when  they  emerged  therefrom  they  found  them- 
selves in  a  big  semi-circular  billiard  room,  with  a 
fireplace  at  each  end  large  enough  to  put  one  of  the 
tables  in,  and  cues  and  counters  and  stools  and 
divans  and  smoking  utensils  sufficient  for  a  regi- 
ment. 

"  I  tell  you,  this  is  the  way  to  do  things," 
exclaimed  Burnett;  "  isn't  it  jolly?  Time  of  your 
life,  old  man,  time  of  your  life ! — And,  oh,  by  the 
way,"  he  said,  suddenly  interrupting  himself,  "  I 
wonder  if  my  sister's  got  here  yet!  " 


INTRODUCING   JACK  27 

"  Which  sister?  "  Jack  inquired;  for  his  friend 
was  one  of  a  very  large  family,  and  he  had  met 
several  of  them  on  their  various  visits  to  town. 

"  Betty — the  one  who  beats  all  the  others  hol- 
low,"— but  just  there  the  conversation  was  broken 
off  by  the  servants  coming  up  with  the  luggage 
and  setting  two  doors  open  that  showed  them  two 
big  rooms,  both  exquisitely  furnished,  and  both 
with  windows  that  looked  out,  first  on  to  a  stone 
balustrade,  and  secondly  on  to  a  superb  view  over 
the  river  and  the  mountains  beyond. 

The  men  unstrapped  the  things  and  went  away, 
leaving  such  a  plenitude  of  comfort  behind  them 
as  led  Jack  to  fling  himself  into  the  most  luxu- 
rious chair  in  the  room  and  stretch  his  arms  and 
legs  far  and  wide  in  utter  contentment. 

Burnett  was  fishing  for  his  key  ring. 

"  It's  a  great  old  place,  isn't  it?  "  he  remarked 
parenthetically.  "  Great  Scott !  but  I'll  bet  we  have 
fun  these  two  days!  And  if  my  sister  Betty  is 
here "  He  paused  expressively. 

"  Doesn't  she  live  at  home?  "  Jack  asked. 

"  She's  just  come  home;  she's  been  in  England 
for  three  years.  Oh,  but  I  tell  you  she's  a 
corker!  " 

"  I  should  think " 

The  sentence  was  never  completed  because  a 
voice  without  the  not-altogether-closed  door  cried : 


28     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"No,  don't  think,  please;  let  me  come  in  in- 
stead." And  in  the  same  instant  Burnett  made 
one  leap  and  flung  the  door  open,  crying  as  he  did 
so: 

"Betty!" 

Then  Jack,  bunching  somewhat  his  starfish  atti- 
tude, looked  across  the  room  and  realized  instantly 
that  it  was  all  up  with  him  forever  after. 

Because 

Because  she  who  stood  there  in  the  door  was 
quite  the  sweetest,  the  loveliest,  the  most  interest- 
ing-looking girl  whom  he  had  ever  laid  eyes  on; 
and  when  she  was  seized  in  her  brother's  arms,  and 
kissed  by  her  brother's  lips,  and  dragged  by  her 
brother's  hands  well  into  the  room,  she  proved  to 
be  a  thousand  times  more  irresistible  than  at 
first. 

"  I  say,  Betty,  you're  absolutely  prettier  than 
ever,"  her  brother  exclaimed,  holding  her  a  little 
off  from  him  and  surveying  her  critically ;  and  then 
he  seemed  to  remember  his  friend's  existence,  and, 
turning  toward  him,  announced  proudly : 

"  My  sister  Bertha." 

Jack  was  standing  up  now  and  thinking  how 
lovely  her  eyes  were  just  at  that  instant  when  they 
were  meeting  his  for  the  first  time,  thinking  much 
else  too.  Thinking  that  Monday  was  only  two 
days  away  (hang  it!);  thinking  that  such  a 


INTRODUCING    JACK  29 

smile  was  never  known  before;  thinking  that  he 
had  years  ahead  at  college;  thinking  that  the  curl 
on  her  forehead  was  simply  distracting  (whereas 
all  other  like  curls  were  horrid)  ;  thinking  that  he 
might  cut  college  and 

"  My  chum,  Jack  Denham,"  Burnett  continued, 
proving  in  the  same  instant  how  rapidly  the  mind 
may  work  since  his  friend  had  compassed  his 
encyclopedia  of  sentiment  and  probability  between 
the  two  halves  of  a  formal  introduction. 

"  Oh,  I'm  very  glad  to  meet  you,  Mr.  Denham," 
she  said,  putting  out  her  hand — and  he  took  and 
held  it  just  long  enough  to  realize  that  he  really  was 
holding  it,  before  she  took  it  away  to  keep  for  her 
own  again.  "  I've  often  heard  6f  you,  and  often 
wished  I  might  know  you." 

"  I'm  awfully  glad  to  hear  you  say  that,"  he 
said,  "  and  if  I  should  have  the  royal  luck  to  be 
next  to  you  at  dinner,  it  doesn't  seem  to  me  that  I 
shall  have  the  strength  to  keep  from  telling 
you  why." 

Sht  clapped  her  hands  at  this,  just  as  a  very  little 
girl  might  have  done. 

"If  that  is  so,  I  hope  that  they  will  put  you 
next  to  me  at  dinner,"  she  said  gayly;  "  but  if  they 
don't,  you'll  tell  me  some  other  time,  won't  you? 
I'm  always  so  interested  in  what  people  have  to 
tell  me  about  myself," 


30     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Burnett  began  to  laugh. 

"  Jack,"  he  said,  "  I  see  that  we'd  better  have  a 
clear  and  above-board  understanding  right  in  the 
beginning  and  so  I'll  just  tell  you  that  this  sister 
of  mine,  who  appears  so  guileless,  is  the  very  worst 
flirt  ever.  She  looks  honest,  but  she  can't  tell  the 
truth  to  save  her  neck.  She  means  well,  but  she 
drives  folks  to  suicide  just  for  fun.  She'd  do  any- 
thing for  anybody  in  general,  but  when  it's  a  case 
of  you  individually  she  won't  do  a  thing  to  you, 
and  you  must  heed  my  words  and  be  fore- 
warned and  forearmed  from  now  on.  Mustn't  he, 
Betty?" 

At  this  the  sister  laughed,  nodding  quite  as 
gayly  as  if  it  were  a  laughing  matter,  instead 
of  the  opening  move  in  a  possibly  serious — 
tremendously  serious — game  of  life. 

"  It's  awful  to  have  to  subscribe  to,"  she  said, 

with  dancing  eyes;  "  but  I'm  afraid  it's  true.     I'm 

really  quite  a  reprobate,  and  I  admit  it  frankly. 

.And  everyone  is  so  good  to  me  that  I  never  get  a 

chance  to  reform.     And  so — and  so " 

"  But  then,  I  suppose  I  ought  to  warn  her  about 
you,  too,"  said  Burnett,  turning  suddenly  toward 
his  friend.  "  It  isn't  fair  to  show  her  up  and  not 
show  you  up,  you  know.  And  really,  Betty,  he's 
almost  as  bad  as  you  are  yourself.  I  may  tell  you 
in  confidence — in  strict  confidence  (for  it's  only 


INTRODUCING   JACK  31 

been  in  a  few  newspapers) — that  he  hasn't  got  his 
breach-of-promise  suit  all  compromised  yet.  Ask 
him  to  deny  it,  if  he  can !  " 

The  sister  looked  suddenly  startled  and  curious 
and  Jack  felt  himself  to  be  blushing  desperately. 

"  I  don't  look  as  if  he  was  lying,  do  I  ?  "  he 
asked  smiling;  "be  honest  now,  for  you  can  see 
that  Burnett  and  I  both  are." 

"  No,  you  don't,"  she  said.  "  You  look  as  if  it 
was  a  very  true  bill." 

"  It  is,"  he  said;  "  and  it's  going  to  be  an  awfully 
big  one,  too,  I'm  afraid." 

"  I  wouldn't  have  thought  you  were  such  a  bad 
man,"  said  the  sister  ever  so  sweetly;  "but  I  like 
bad  men.  They  interest  me.  They " 

"  There ! — I  see  your  finish,"  said  Burnett. 
"  That's  one  of  her  favorite  opening  plays.  It's 
all  up  with  you,  Jack,  and  your  aunt  will  have  to 
to  go  down  for  another  damage  suit  when  you 
begin  to  perceive  that  you  have  had  enough  of  our 
family.  But  you'll  have  to  get  out  now,  Betty, 
and  let  him  get  dressed  for  dinner.  You  needn't 
cry  about  it  either  for  he's  even  more  attractive  in 
his  glad  rags  than  he  is  in  his  railway  dust — my 
word  of  honor  on  it." 

"  I  look  nice  myself  when  I'm  dinner-dressed," 
said  the  sister,  "  so  I  sympathize  with  him  and  I'll 
go  with  pleasure.  Good-bye." 


32     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

She  sort  of  backed  toward  the  door  and  Jack 
sprang  to  open  it  for  her. 

"  You  can  kiss  her  hand,  if  you  like,"  Burnett 
said  kindly.  "  They  do  in  Germany,  you  know. 
I  don't  mind  and  mamma  needn't  know." 

"  May  I?  "  Jack  asked  her;  and  then  he  caught 
her  eye  over  her  brother's  bent  head  and  added, 
so  quickly  that  there  was  hardly  any  break  at  all 
between  the  words:  "  Some  other  time?  " 

"  Some  other  time,"  she  said,  with  a  world  of 
meaning  in  the  promise;  and  then  she  flashed  one 
wonderful  look  straight  into  his  eyes  and  was  gone. 

"  Isn't  she  great?  "  Burnett  asked,  unlocking  his 
suit-case  in  the  most  provokingly  every-day  style,  as 
if  this  day  was  an  every-day  sort  of  day  and  not  the 
beginning  and  end  of  all  things.  "  Oh,  I  tell  you, 
I'm  almost  dotty  over  that  sister  myself." 

"  Do  you  suppose  that  I  could  manage  to  have 
her  for  dinner?"  Jack  asked,  feeling  desperately 
how  dull  any  other  place  at  the  table  would  be 
now. 

"  I  don't  know.  When  I  go  down  to  my 
mother  I'll  try  to  manage  it;  shall  I?  " 

"  I  wish  you  would." 

"  I  reckon  I  can;  but,  great  loads  of  fire,  fellow ! 
don't  think  you  can  play  tag  with  her,  and  feel 
funny  at  the  finish.  She'll  do  you  up  completely, 
and  never  turn  a  hair  herself.  She's  always  at  it. 


INTRODUCING   JACK  33 

She  don't  mean  to  be  cruel,  but  she's  naturally  a 
carnivorous  animal.  It's  her  little  way." 

Jack  did  not  look  as  dismal  as  he  should  have 
done;  he  smiled,  and  looked  out  of  the  window 
instead. 

"  She'll  have  to  marry  someone  some  day,  you 
know,"  he  said  thoughtfully. 

"  Have  to  marry  someone  some  day!  "  Burnett 
cried.  "  Why,  she  is  married.  Didn't  you  know 
that?  "  and  he  unbuckled  the  shirt  portfolio  as  he 
spoke  just  as  if  calamities  and  tragedies  and  shoot- 
ing stars  might  not  follow  on  the  heels  of  such 
a  simple  statement  as  that  last. 

It  was  an  awful  moment,  but  poor  Jack  did  man- 
age to  continue  looking  out  of  the«window.  If 
any  greater  demand  had  been  made  upon  him  he 
might  have  sunk  beneath  the  double  weight. 

"  No,"  he  said  at  last,  his  voice  painfully  steady; 
"  I  didn't  know  it." 

Burnett  laughed  heartlessly,  hauling  forth  his 
apparel  with  a  refined  cruelty  which  took  careful 
heed  of  possible  interfolded  shoes  or  cravats. 

"  She  married  an  Englishman  when  she  was 
nineteen  years  old,"  he  said.  "  That  was  when 
they  sent  me  to  Eton  that  little  while, — until  I 
drove  the  horse  through  the  drug  shop.  The  time 
I  told  you  about,  don't  you  know?  " 

"  Yes,  I  remember,"  said  Jack,     He  observed 


34     REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

with  sickening  distinctness  that  the  night  had  begun 
to  fall,  the  river's  silver  ribbon  had  become  a 
black  snake,  and  that  the  mountain  range  beyond 
loomed  chill  and  dark  and  cheerless.  "  I  guess  I 
ought  to  be  getting  into  my  things,"  he  said,  mov- 
ing toward  his  own  door. 

"  There's  a  bath  in  here,"  his  friend  called  after 
him.  "  We're  to  divide  it." 

"  Sure,"  was  the  reply.  It  sounded  a  trifle 
thick. 

"  I  don't  think  that  she  ought  to,"  said  the 
brother  to  himself,  as  he  began  to  draw  out  his 
stick-pin  before  the  mirror,  "  I  don't  care  if  she  is 
my  favorite  sister — I  don't  think  that  she  ought 
to." 

Then  he  went  on  to  make  ready  for  the  securing 
of  his  half  of  the  bath,  and  forthwith  forgot  his 
sister  and  his  friend. 


Chapter  Four 

MARRIED 

IT  was  almost  like  a  scene  at  a  ball,  the  great 
white-and-gold  music  room  before  dinner  that 
night.  The  Burnett  family  proper  numbered 
fifteen  among  themselves,  and  there  were  nearly 
thirty  guests  added.  It  was  entirely  too  large  a 
house  party  to  have  handled  successfully  for  very 
long,  but  it  would  be  most  awfully  jolly  for  three 
or  four  days;  and  now,  when  the  whole  crowd 
were  gathered  waiting  for  dinner,  the  picture  was 
one  of  such  bubbling  joy  that  Jack's  very  heavy 
heart  seemed  to  himself  to  be  terribly  out  of  place 
there  and  he  wondered  whether  he  should  be  able 
to  put  up  even  a  fairly  presentable  front  during  the 
endless  hours  that  must  ensue  before  the  time  for 
breaking  up  arrived. 

Burnett  took  him  all  around  and  introduced  him 
to  people  in  general,  and  people  in  general  seemed 
to  him  to  merely  bring  the  fact  of  her  pre-eminence 
more  vividly  than  ever  before  his  mind.  He 
found  himself  looking  everywhere  but  at  them  too, 

35 


36     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

and  listening  with  an  acutely  sensitive  ear  for 
sounds  quite  other  than  those  of  their  various  lips. 
But  eternal  disappointment  rewarded  his  eyes  and 
ears.  She  was  nowhere. 

So  he  talked  blindly  about  nothing  to  all  the 
nobodies  and  laughed  stupidly  over  all  their  stu- 
pidities until — suddenly  and  without  any  warning 
— a  fearful  jump  in  his  throat  sent  the  mercury  in 
his  constitution  shooting  up  to  160,  and  he  saw, 
.heard,  felt,  gasped,  and  knew,  that  that  radiant 
angel  in  silver  tissue  who  had  just  entered  the 
farther  end  of  the  room  was  indubitably  Herself. 

(Married!) 

He  quite  forgot  who,  what  and  where  he  was. 
There  was  a  somebody  talking  to  him — a  very 
awful  and  bony  young  lady,  but  she  faded  so  com- 
pletely out  of  the  general  scheme  of  his  immediate 
present  that  all  the  use  he  made  of  her  was  to  stare 
over  her  head  at  the  distant  apparition  that  was 
become,  now  and  forever,  his  All  in  All.  The  dis- 
tant apparition  had  not  lied  when  she  had  told  him 
up  in  her  brother's  room  that  she  too,  looked 
"  nice  "  when  dressed  for  dinner.  Only  the  word 
"  nice  "  was  as  watered  milk  to  the  champagne  of 
her  appearance.  She  was  gowned  superbly  and 
her  throat  and  arms  were  half  bared  by  the  folds 
of  silvered  lace;  her  hair  fitted  into  the  back  of 
her  neck  in  the  smoothest  mass  of  puffs  and  coils, 


MARRIED  37 

and  the  curl  on  her  forehead  was  more  distracting 
than  ever. 

(Married!) 

She  seemed  to  be  speaking  to  everyone,  and 
everyone  seemed  to  be  crowding  around  her.  He 
couldn't  go  up  like  everyone  else,  because  the 
awful  and  bony  young  lady  was  talking  hard  at 
him  and  heightened  her  charms  with  a  smile  that 
took  up  two-fifths  of  her  face,  and  wrinkled  all  the 
rest. 

Her  name  was  Lome — Maude  Lome.  He 
knew  that  she  must  be  a  relative  without  being  told, 
because  otherwise  she  wouldn't  have  been  invited 
at  all.  Anyone  could  divine  that. 

"  Oh,  isn't  dear  Betty  just  lovely?  "  this  fearful 
freak  said.  "I  think  she's  just  too  lovely  for 
anything !  She's  my  cousin,  you  know ;  we're  often 
mistaken  for  one  another." 

"  I  can  well  believe  it,"  said  Jack,  heavily,  not 
ceasing  to  stare  beyond  as  he  said  it. 

(Married!) 

"Oh,  you're  flattering  me!  Because  she's  ever 
so  much  prettier  than  I  am,  and  I  know  it." 

He  didn't  reply.  It  had  suddenly  come  over 
him  to  wonder  whether  there  ever  had  been  an 
authentic  case  of  heartbreak.  Because  he  had  the 
most  terrible  ache  right  in  his  left  side! 

(Married!     Married!) 


38     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  But,  then,"  Missr  Lome  continued,  "  I'm 
younger  than  she  is.  Her  being  married  makes 
her  seem  young,  but  she's  really  twenty-four.  I'm 
only  twenty." 

He  shut  his  eyes,  and  then  opened  them.  He 
wished  he  hadn't  come  here,  and  then  grew  shivery 
to  think  that  he  might  have  happened  not  to;  and 
all  the  while  that  awful  twisting  and  wrenching 
at  his  heart  was  getting  worse  and  worse. 

(Married!     Married!     Married!) 

Burnett  came  up  just  then  with  a  man  wearing 
a  monocle  and  presented  him  to  Denham,  and 
forthwith  handed  the  bony  cousin  to  his  safe- 
keeping. 

"She's  a  great  pill,  isn't  she?"  he  began,  as 
the  couple  moved  away ;  and  then  he  stopped  short. 
"  What's  the  matter?  "  he  asked.  "  Sick?  " 

"  I  hope  not,"  said  Jack,  trying  to  smile. 

'  You  look  hipped,"  his  friend  said  anxiously. 
"  Better  go  get  a  bracer;  you'll  have  time  if  you 
hurry.  You  can't  be  sick  before  dinner,  because 
I've  been  moving  all  the  cards  around  so  as  to  get 
Betty  next  to  you,  and  I  could  never  get  them  back 
as  they  were  before  if  you  gave  out  at  the  last 
minute." 

"  I  don't  believe  I'm  ill,"  said  Jack,  trying  to 
realize  whether  the  news  that  she  was  to  be  his  ( for 
dinner)  made  him  feel  any  better  or  only  just  about 


MARRIED  39 

the  same.     "  I  don't  know  what  ails  me.     Do  I 
look  seedy?  " 

"  You  look  sort  of  knocked  out,  that's  all,"  said 
Burnett.  "  Perhaps,  though,  it  was  just  the  hav- 
ing to  talk  to  my  cousin  Maude  so  long.  Isn't 
she  the  limit,  though?  But  I'll  tell  you  the  one 
big  thing  about  that  girl:  She's  just  the  biggest 
kind  of  a  catch.  She  was  my  uncle's  eldest  child; 
she's  worth  twelve  times  what  any  of  us  ever  will 
be." 

"  I'm  sure  she'll  need  it,"  said  Jack  heartily. 

"You're  right  there,"  laughed  his  friend; 
"  but  you've  got  to  hurry  and  get  your  brandy  now 
if  you  want  it,  because  they'll  be  going  out  in  a 
minute." 

"  Oh,  I'm  all  right,"  said  the  poor  chap,  straight- 
ening his  shoulders  back  a  little.  "  I  can  make 
out  well  enough,  I'm  sure.  I  think  I'd  better  go 
over  by  your  sister  and  let  her  know  that  I'm  ready 
when  the  hour  of  need  shall  strike." 

Burnet  nodded  and  then  he  went  on  and  his 
friend  walked  down  the  room,  no  one  but  himself 
knowing  that  he  was  making  his  way  into  the  lion's 
(or,  rather,  lioness's)  den. 

And  then  he  paused  there  beside  her.  Oh !  she 
was  seven  million  times  lovelier  close  to  than  far 
away.  All  the  rot  about  Venus  and  statues  and 
paintings  and  Helen  of  Troy  was  nowhere  beside 


40     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Her  and  he  felt  his  strength  come  surging  mightily 
upward  and  then — oh  Heavens ! 

She  looked  up — looked  so  sweetly  up — right 
into  his  eyes  and  smiled. 

"  I  expect  you  are  to  take  me  into  dinner,"  she 
said;  and  at  her  words  the  man  who  had  been 
talking  to  her  murmured  something  meaningless 
and  got  out  of  their  way. 

"  I  believe  so,"  he  said. 

She  rose  and  he  noticed  that  the  top  of  her  head 
was  just  level  with  his  coat  lapel.  He  wondered, 
with  a  miserable  pang,  where  she  came  to  on  her 
husband's  coat  and  with  the  wonder  his  surging 
strength  surged  suddenly  out^to  sea  again  and  left 
him  feeling  like  Samson  when  he  awoke  to  the 
realization  of  his  haircut. 

"  Dinner's  very  late,"  she  said,  quite  as  if  life 
presented  no  problem  whatever;  "  you  see,  it's  the 
first  big  company  in  the  house.  We  were  only 
seventeen  last  night,  and  to-night  we're  forty-five. 
It  makes  a  difference." 

"  I  can  imagine  so,"  he  said.  He  was  suddenly 
acutely  aware  of  feeling  very  awkward,  and  of 
finding  her  different — quite  different  from  what 
she  had  seemed  up  in  her  brother's  room. 

"  What  is  it?  "  she  asked  after  a  minute,  look- 
ing up  at  him;  and  then  she  showed  that  she  was 
conscious  of  the  change,  for  she  added :  "  Some- 


MARRIED  41 

thing  has  happened;  Bob  has  been  saying  mean 
things  about  me  to  you?  " 

"  Yes,  he  did  tell  me  something,"  he  admitted; 
and  just  then  the  butler  announced  dinner. 

"What  did  he  tell  you?"  she  asked,  as  they 
moved  away.  "  How  could  he  say  anything  worse 
than  what  he  said  before  me?  " 

"  He  told  me  something  that  was  worse — much 
worse." 

She  looked  troubled  and  as  if  she  did  not  under- 
stand. 

"  But  he  said  that  I  was  a  flirt,  and  that  I 
couldn't  speak  the  truth,  and  that  I  drove  peo- 
pie- 

""Yes,  I  remember  all  that;  but  this  was  in- 
finitely worse." 

"  Infinitely  worse  1  " 

"  Yes." 

She  stopped  in  an  angle  where  the  big  room 
dwindled  into  a  narrow  gallery,  and  stared  aston- 
ished. 

"  I  can't  at  all  understand,"  she  said. 

"  No,  you  can't,"  he  said,  "  and  I  can't  tell  you 
—I  mustn't  tell  you — how  terrible  it  is  to  me  to 
look  at  you  and  think  of  what  he  told  me." 

After  a  second  she  went  on  again  and  presently 
they  entered  the  dining-room.  The  confusion  of 
rustling  skirts  and  sliding  chairs  quite  covered 


42     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

their  speech  for  a  moment  and  made  them  seem 
almost  alone.  Her  hand  had  been  resting  on  his 
arm  and  now  she  drew  it  out,  looking  up  at  him 
again  as  she  did  so.  Her  eyes  had  a  premonitory 
mist  over  them. 

"  For  Heaven's  sake,"  she  said  very  earnestly, 
"  tell  me  what  he  said?  " 

He  was  silent. 

"  Tell  me,"  she  pleaded. 

He  was  still  silent. 

"  Tell  me,"  she  said   imperiously. 

He  continued  silent.     They  sat  down. 

"  Mr.  Denham,"  she  said,  as  she  took  up  her 
napkin,  and  her  voice  grew  very  low,  and  yet  he 
heard,  "  I  don't  think  that  we  can  pretend  to  be 
joking  any  longer.  You  are  my  brother's  friend, 
and  I  am  a  married  woman.  Please  treat  me  as 
you  should." 

"  That's  just  it,"  said  Jack;  "  that's  all  there  is 
to  it.  It  wouldn't  have  amounted  to  anything 
except  for  that — or  perhaps,  if  it  hadn't  been 
for  that,  it  might  have  amounted  to  a  great 
deal." 

"If  it  hadn't  been  for  what?" 

"  For  your  being  married.'* 

She  quite  started  in  her  seat. 

"  What  do  you  mean?  " 

"  You  see  I  never  knew  it  before." 


MARRIED  43 

"  You  never  knew  what  before?  " 

"  That  you  were  married." 

"Until  when?" 

"  Until  after  you  went  out  of  the  room  to-night." 

The  men  were  putting  the  clams  around.  She 
seemed  to  reflect.  And  then  she  peppered  and 
salted  them  before  she  spoke. 

"  Bob  is  very  wrong  to  talk  so,"  she  said  at  last, 
picking  up  her  fork,  "  when  you're  his  friend,  too." 

He  poked  his  clams — he  hated  clams. 

"  I  suppose  men  think  it's  amusing  to  do  such 
things,"  she  continued,  "  but  I  think  it's  as  ill-bred 
as  practical  joking." 

"  But  you  are  married,"  he  said,  trying  fiercely 
to  pepper  some  taste  into  the  tasteless  things  before 
him. 

"  Yes,  I'm  married,"  she  admitted  tranquilly, 
"  but,  then,  my  husband  went  to  Africa  so  soon 
afterwards  that  he  hardly  seemed  to  count  at  all. 
And  then  he  was  killed  there;  so,  after  that,  he 
seemed  to  count  less  than  ever." 

The  air  danced  exclamation  points  and  the  man 
on  the  other  side  spoke  to  her  then  so  that  her  turn- 
ing to  answer  him  gave  Jack  time  to  rally  his  wits. 

(A  widow!) 

Then  she  turned  back  and  said: 

"  I  think  Bob  mystified  you  unnecessarily.  Of 
course  I  don't  flatter  myself  that  you've  suffered." 


44     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Oh,  but  I  have,"  he  hastened  to  assure  her. 

(A  widow!     A  widow!) 

"  But  it  always  makes  a  difference  whether  a 
woman  is  married  or  not." 

"  I  should  say  it  did,"  he  interrupted  again. 
"  It  makes  all  the  difference  in  the  world." 

At  that  she  laughed  outright,  and  someone  sud- 
denly abstracted  the  distasteful  clams  and  substi- 
tuted for  them  a  golden  and  glorious  soup,  and 
music  sounded  forth  from  some  invisible  quartet, 
and — and 

(A  widow!     A  widow!     A  widow!) 


Chapter  Five 

THE  DAY  AFTER  FALLING  IN  LOVE 

THE  next  day  was  a  very  memorable  day 
for  Jack.  The  day  after  a  falling  in  love 
is  always  a  red-letter  day ;  but  the  day  after 
the  falling  in  love — ah ! 

One  looks  back — far  back — to  the  day  before, 
and  those  hours  of  the  day  before,  when  her  sun 
had  not  yet  dawned,  and  struggles  to  recollect 
what  ends  life  could  have  represented  then. 
And  one  looks  forward  to  the  next  day,  the  next 
week,  the  next  year — but,  particularly  to  the  next 
morning  with  sensations  as  indescribable  as  they 
are  delightful. 

Whichever  way  you  tip  it,  the  kaleidoscope  of 
the  future  arranges  itself  in  equally  attractive 
shapes  of  rainbow  hue,  and  the  prospect  over  land 
or  sea — even  if  it  is  raining — looks  brilliant  green, 
and  brighter  red,  and  brightest  yellow. 

Upon  that  glorious  "  next  day  "  of  Jack's  the 
weather  was  quite  a  thing  apart  for  February — 
partaking  of  the  warmth  of  May,  and  owing  that 
fact  to  a  sun  which  early  June  need  not  have 

45 


46     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

scorned  to  own.  Under  the  circumstances  the 
house  party  overflowed  the  house  and  ravaged  the 
surrounding  country,  and  Jack  and  Mrs.  Rosscott 
began  it  all  by  having  the  highest  cart  and  the 
fastest  cob  in  the  stables  and  making  for  the  forest 
just  as  the  clock  was  tolling  ten. 

"  Do  you  want  a  groom?  "  asked  Burnett,  who 
was  occasionally  very  cruel. 

"  Well,  I'm  not  going  to  wait  for  him  to  get 
ready  now,"  replied  his  sister,  who  had  sharp  wits 
and  did  not  disdain  to  give  even  her  own  family  the 
benefit  of  them. 

Then  she  gathered  up  the  reins  and  whip  in  a 
most  scientific  manner,  and  they  were  off.  Jack 
folded  his  arms.  He  was  simply  flooded,  drenched, 
and  saturated  with  joy.  The  evening  before 
had  been  Elysium  when  she  had  only  been  his 
now  and  again  for  a  minute's  conversation,  but 
now  she  was  to  be  his  and  his  alone  until — until  they 
came  back — and  his  mind  seemed  able  to  grasp  no 
dearer  outlines  of  the  form  which  Bliss  Incarnate 
may  be  supposed  to  take.  He  didn't  care  where 
they  went  or  what  they  saw  or  what  they  talked  of, 
just  if  only  he  and  she  might  be  going,  seeing,  and 
talking  for  the  benefit  of  one  another  and  of  one 
another  alone. 

They  bowled  away  upon  a  firm,  hard  road  that 
skirted  the  park,  and  then  plunged  deeply  into  the 


THE   DAY   AFTER   FALLING   IN   LOVE    47 

forest.  Mrs.  Rosscott  handled  the  reins  and  the 
whip  with  the  hands  of  an  expert. 

"  I  like  to  drive,"  said  she. 

"  You  appear  to,"  he  answered. 

"  I  like  to  do  everything,"  she  said.  "  I'm  very 
athletic  and  energetic." 

"  I'm  glad  of  that,"  he  told  her  warmly.  "  I 
like  athletic  girls." 

He  really  thought  that  he  was  speaking  the 
truth,  although  upon  that  first  day  if  she  had  de- 
clared herself  lazy  and  languid  he  would  have 
found  her  equally  to  his  taste — because  it  was  the 
first  day. 

"  That's  kind  of  you,  after  my  speech,"  she  said 
smiling,  "  but  let's  wait  a  bit  before  we  begin  to 
talk  about  me.  Let  us  talk  about  you  first — you're 
the  company,  you  know." 

"  But  there's  nothing  to  tell  about  me,"  said 
Jack,  "  except  that  I'm  always  in  difficulties — 
financial — or  otherwise, — oftenest  '  otherwise,'  I 
must  confess." 

"  But  you  have  a  rich  aunt,  haven't  you?  "  said 
Mrs.  Rosscott.  "  I  thought  that  I  had  heard  about 
your  aunt." 

"  Oh,  yes,  I  have  a  rich  aunt,"  Jack  said,  laugh- 
ing, "  and  I  can  assure  you  that  if  I  am  not  much 
credit  to  my  aunt,  my  aunt  is  the  greatest  possible 
credit  to  me." 


48     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Yes,  I've  heard  that,  too,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott, 
joining  in  the  laugh,  "  you  see  I'm  well  posted." 

"  If  you're  so  well  posted  as  to  me,"  Jack  said, 
"  do  be  kind  and  post  me  a  little  as  to  yourself. 
You  don't  need  information  and  I  do." 

She  turned  and  looked  at  him. 

"  What  shall  I  tell  you  first?  "  she  inquired. 

"  Tell  me  what  you  like  and  what  you  don't  like 
— and  that  will  give  me  courage  to  .do  the  same 
later,"  he  added  boldly. 

She  laughed  outright  at  that  and  then  sobered 
quickly. 

"  I  told  you  that  I  liked  to  drive  and  to  do  every- 
thing," she  said  lightly;  "  what  else  do  you  want  to 
know  about?  " 

"  What  you  dislike." 

"  But  I  don't  know  of  anything  that  I  dislike;  " 
she  said  thoughtfully — "  perhaps  I  don't  like 
England;  I  am  not  sure,  though.  I  had  a  pretty 
good  time  there  after  all — only  you  know,  being 
in  mourning  was  so  stupid.  And  then,  too,  I  didn't 
fit  into  their  ideas.  I  really  didn't  seem  to  get  the 
true  inwardness  of  what  was  expected  of  me.  Oh, 
I  never  dared  let  them  know  at  home  what  a 
failure  I  was  as  an  Englishwoman.  I  mortified 
my  husband's  sisters  all  the  time.  Just  think — 
after  a  whole  year  I  often  forgot  to  say  *  Fancy 
now  1 '  and  used  to  say  4  Good  gracious ! '  instead." 


THE   DAY   AFTER   FALLING   IN   LOVE    49 

Jack  laughed. 

"  My  husband's  sisters  were  very  unhappy  about 
it.  They  did  want  to  love  me,  because  I  had  so 
much  money;  but  it  was  tough  work  for  them. 
Did  you  ever  know  any  middle-aged  English  young 
ladies?  "  she  asked  him  suddenly. 

"  No,  I  never  did,"  he  said. 

"  Really,  they  seem  to  be  a  thing  apart  that  can't 
grow  anywhere  but  in  England.  Every  married 
man  has  not  less  than  two,  nor  more  than  three,  and 
they  always  are  a  little  gray  and  embroider  very 
nicely.  Someone  told  me  that  as  long  as  there's 
any  hope  they  wear  stout  boots  and  walk  about  and 
hunt,  but  as  soon  as  it's  hopeless  they  take  to  em- 
broidering." 

"  It  must  be  rather  a  blue  day  for  them  when 
they  decide  definitely  to  make  the  change,"  said 
Jack. 

"  I  never  thought  of  that,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott 
soberly.  "  Of  course  it  must !  I  was  always  very 
good  to  them.  I  gave  them  ever  so  many  things 
that  I  could  have  used  longer  myself,  and  they  used 
to  set  pieces  of  muslin  in  behind  the  open-work 
places  and  wear  them." 

She  sighed. 

"  It's  quite  as  bad  as  being  a  Girton  girl,"  she 
said.  "  Do  you  know  what  a  Girton  girl  is?  " 

"  No,  I  don't." 


50     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  It's  a  girl  from  Girton  College.  It's  the  most 
awful  freak  you  ever  saw.  They're  really  quite 
beyond  everything.  They're  so  homely,  and  their 
hands  and  feet  are  so  enormous,  and  their  pins 
never  pin,  and  their  belts  never  belt.  And  no  one 
has  ever  married  one  of  them  yet  I  " 

She  paused  dramatically. 

"  I  won't  either,  then,"  he  declared. 

She  laughed  at  that,  and  touched  up  the  cob  a 
trifle. 

"  Did  you  live  long  in  England?  "  he  asked. 

"  Forever!  "  she  answered  with  emphasis;  "  at 
least  it  seemed  like  forever.  Mamma  left  me 
there  when  I  was  nineteen  (she  married  me  off 
before  she  left  me,  of  course)  and  I  stayed  there 
until  last  winter — until  I  was  out  of  my  mourning, 
you  know — and  then  I  was  on  the  Continent  for  a 
while,  and  then  I  returned  to  papa." 

"  How  do  we  strike  you  after  your  long 
absence?  " 

"  Oh,  you  suit  me  admirably,"  she  said,  turning 
and  smiling  squarely  into  his  face;  "  only  the  terri- 
ble '  and '  of  the  majority  does  get  on  my  nerves 
somewhat." 

"What4  and'?" 

"  Haven't  you  noticed?  Why  when  an  Ameri- 
can runs  out  of  talking  material  he  just  rests  on  one 
poor  little  '  and  '  until  a  fresh  run  of  thought  over- 


THE   DAY   AFTER   FALLING   IN   LOVE    51 

whelms  him;  you  listen  to  the  next  person  you're 
talking  with,  and  you'll  hear  what  I  mean." 

Jack  reflected. 

"  I  will,"  he  said  at  last. 

The  road  went  sweeping  in  and  out  among  a 
thicket  of  bare  tree  trunks  and  brown  copses,  and 
the  sunlight  fell  out  of  the  blue  sky  above  straight 
down  upon  their  heads. 

"  If  it  don't  annoy  you,  my  referring  to  England 
so  often,"  said  she  presently,  "  I  will  state  that 
this  reminds  me  of  Kaysmere,  the  country  place  of 
my  father-in-law." 

"  Is  your  father-in  law  living  yet?  " 

"  Dear  me,  yes — and  still  has  hold  of  the  title 
that  I  supposed  I  was  getting  when  I  was  married 
to  his  eldest  son.  My  father-in-law  is  a  particu- 
larly healthy  old  gentleman  of  eighty.  He  was 
forty  years  old  when  he  married.  He  didn't 
expect  to  marry,  you  know — he  couldn't  see  his 
way  to  ever  affording  it.  But  he  jumped  into  the 
title  suddenly  and  then,  of  course,  he  married  right 
away.  He  had  to.  You'd  know  what  a  hurry 
he  must  have  been  in  to  look  at  my  mamma-in-law's 
portrait." 

''  Was  she  so  very  beautiful?  " 

"  No;  she  was  so  very  homely.  Maude's  very 
like  her." 

Jack  laughed. 


52     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

She  laughed,  too. 

"  Aren't  we  happy  together?  "  she  asked. 

"  My  sky  knows  but  one  cloud,"  he  rejoined, 
"  and  that  is  that  Monday  comes  after  Sunday." 

"  But  we  shall  meet  again,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott. 
"  Because,"  she  added  mischievously,  "  I  don't  sup- 
pose that  it's  on  account  of  my  cousin  Maude  that 
you  rebel  at  the  approach  of  Monday." 

"  No,"  said  Jack.  "  It  may  not  be  polite  to  say 
so  to  you,  but  I  wasn't  in  the  least  thinking  of  your 
cousin." 

"  Poor  girl!  "  said  Mrs.  Rosscott  thoughtfully; 
"  and  she  was  so  sweet  to  you,  too.  Mustn't  it  be 
terrible  to  have  a  face  like  that?  " 

"  It  must  indeed,"  said  Jack;  "  I  can  think  of 
but  one  thing  worse." 

"What?" 

"  To  marry  a  face  like  that." 

She  laughed  again. 

"You're  cruel,"  she  declared;  "after  all  her 
face  isn't  her  fortune,  so  what  does  it  matter?  " 

"  It  doesn't  matter  at  all  to  me,"  said  Jack.  "  I 
know  of  very  few  things  that  can  matter  less  to  me 
than  Miss  Lome's  face." 

"  Now,  you're  cruel  again;  and  she  was  so  nice  to 
you  too.  Absolutely,  I  don't  believe  that  the  edges 
of  her  smile  came  together  once  while  she  was 
talking  to  you  last  night." 


THE   DAY   AFTER   FALLING   IN   LOVE    53 

"  Did  you  spy  on  us  to  that  extent?  "  said  Jack. 
"  I  wouldn't  have  believed  it  of  you." 

"  Oh,  I'm  very  awful,"  she  said  airily.  "  You'll 
be  more  surprised  the  farther  you  penetrate  into 
the  wilderness  of  my  ways." 

"  And  when  will  I  have  a  chance  to  plunge  into 
the  jungle,  do  you  think?  " 

"  Any  Saturday  or  Sunday  that  you  happen  to 
be  in  town." 

"  Are  you  going  to  live  in  town?  " 

11  For  a  while.  I've  taken  a  house  until  the 
beginning  of  July.  I  expect  some  friends  over, 
and  I  want  to  entertain  them." 

Jack  felt  the  sky  above  become  refulgent.  He 
was  in  the  habit  of  spending  every  Saturday  night 
in  the  city — he  and  Burnett  together. 

"  May  I  come  as  often  as  I  like?  "  he  asked. 

"Certainly,"  said  she;  "because  you  know  if 
you  should  come  too  often  I  can  tell  the  man  at  the 
door  to  say  I'm  '  not  at  home  '  to  you." 

"  But  if  he  ever  says  : '  She's  not  at  home  to  you,' 
I  shall  walk  right  in  and  fall  upon  the  man  that  you 
are  being  at  home  to  just  then." 

"  But  he  is  a  very  large  man,"  said  Mrs.  Ross- 
cott  seriously;  "  he's  larger  than  you  are,  I  think." 

Jack  felt  the  blue  heavens  breaking  up  into  thun-i 
derbolts  for  his  head  at  this  speech. 

"  But  I'm  'way  over  six  feet,"  he  said,  his  heart 


54     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

going  heavily  faster,  even  while  he  told  himself 
that  he  might  have  known  it,  anyhow. 

"  He's  all  of  six  feet  two,"  she  said  medita- 
tively. "  I  do  believe  he's  even  taller.  I  remem- 
ber liking  him  at  the  first  glance,  just  because  he 
struck  me  as  so  royal  looking." 

He  was  miserably  conscious  of  acute  distress. 

"  Do — do  you  mind  my  smoking? "  he 
stammered. 

(Might  have  known  that,  of  course,  there  was 
bound  to  be  someone  like  that.) 

"  Not  at  all,"  she  rejoined  amiably.  "  I  like 
the  odor  of  cigarettes.  Shall  I  stop  a  little,  while 
you  set  yourself  afire?  " 

"  It  isn't  necessary,"  he  said.  "  I  can  set  myself 
afire  under  any  circumstances." 

He  lit  a  cigarette. 

"  Is  he  English  ?  "  he  couldn't  help  asking  then. 

"  Yes,"  she  said;  "  I  like  the  English." 

"  You  appear  to  like  everything  to-day."  He 
did  not  intend  to  seem  bitter,  but  he  did  it  uninten- 
tionally. 

(Confounded  luck  some  fellows  have.) 

"  I  do.     I'm  very  well  content  to-day." 

He  was  silent,  thinking. 

"  Well,"  she  queried,  after  a  while. 

He  pulled  himself  together  with  an  effort. 

"  I  think  perhaps  it's  just  as  well,"  he  said. 


THE   DAY   AFTER    FALLING   IN   LOVE    55 

"What  is  just  as  well?" 

11  That  I  know." 

"Know  what?" 

"  About  him.  I  shan't  ever  take  the  chances  of 
calling  on  you  now." 

She  laughed. 

"  He  wouldn't  put  you  out  unless  I  told  him 
to,"  she  said.  "  You  needn't  be  too  afraid  of  him, 
you  know." 

His  face  grew  a  trifle  flushed. 

"  I'm  not  afraid,"  he  said,  as  coldly  as  it  was  in 
him  to  speak;  "  but  I'll  leave  him  the  field." 

She  turned  and  looked  at  him. 

"  The  field? "  she  asked,  with  puzzled  eye- 
brows. 

"  Yes." 

Then  she  frowned  for  an  instant,  and  then  a 
species  of  thought-ray  suddenly  flew  across  her 
face  and  she  burst  out  laughing. 

"  Why,  I  do  believe,"  she  cried  merrily,  "  I  do 
believe  you're  jealous  of  the  man  at  the  door." 

"  Weren't  you  speaking  of  a  man  in  the  drawing- 
room?  "  he  asked,  all  her  phrases  recurring  to  his 
mind  together. 

"  No,"  she  said  laughing;  "  I  was  speaking  of 
my  footman.  Oh,  you  are  so  funny." 

The  way  the  sun  shone  suddenly  again!  His 
horizon  glowed  so  madly  that  he  quite  lost  his  head 


56     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

and  leaning  quickly  downward  seized  her  hand  in 
its  little  tan  driving  glove  of  stitched  dogskin,  and 
kissed  it — reins  and  all. 

"  I'm  not  funny,"  he  said,  "  it  was  the  most 
natural  thing  in  the  world." 

She  was  laughing,  but  she  curbed  it. 

"  You'd  better  not  be  foolish,"  she  said  warn- 
ingly.  "  It  don't  mix  well  with  college." 

"  I'm  thinking  of  cutting  college,"  he  declared 
boldly. 

"  Don't  let  us  decide  on  anything  definite  until 
we've  known  one  another  twenty-four  hours,"  she 
said,  looking  at  him  with  a  gravity  that  was  almost 
maternal;  and  then  she  turned  the  horse's  head 
toward  home. 


Chapter  Six 

THE     OTHER     MAN 

THAT  evening  Burnett  felt  it  necessary  to 
give  his  friend  a  word  of  warning. 
"  Holloway's  going  to  take  Betty  in  to- 
night," he  said,  as  they  descended  the  tower  stairs 
together. 

"  Who's  Holloway?  "  Jack  asked. 

"  You  can't  expect  to  have  her  all  the  time,  you 
know,"  Burnett  continued:  "  She's  really  one  of 
the  biggest  guns  here,  even  if  she  is  one  of  the 
family." 

"Who's  Holloway?" 

"  Last  night  the  mater  had  her  all  mapped  out 
for  General  Jiggs,  and  I  had  an  awful  time  getting 
her  off  his  hook  and  on  to  yours,  and  then  you 
drove  her  all  this  morning  and  walked  her  all  the 
afternoon,  and  the  old  lady  says  she's  got  to  play 
in  Holloway's  yard  to-night — jus'  lil'  bit,  you 
know." 

;<  Who's  Holloway?  "  Jack  demanded. 

"You  know  Horace  Holloway;  we  were  up 
at  his  place  once  for  the  night.  Don't  you  re- 
member? " 

57 


58     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  I  remember  his  place  well  enough ;  but  he 
hadn't  got  in  when  we  came,  and  hadn't  got  up 
when  we  left,  so  his  features  aren't  as  distinctly 
imprinted  on  my  memory  as  they  might  be." 

"  That's  so,"  said  Burnett,  pushing  aside  the 
curtains  that  concealed  the  foot  of  the  wee  stair; 
"  I'd  forgotten.  Well,  you'll  meet  him  to-night, 
anyhow;  he  came  on  the  five-five.  Holly's  a  nice 
fellow,  only  he's  so  darned  over-full  of  good  advice 
that  he  keeps  you  feeling  withersome." 

Jack  laughed. 

"  Did  he  ever  give  you  any  advice?  "  he  asked. 

"Why?" 

"  I  don't  recollect  your  taking  it." 

"  I  never  take  anything,"  said  Burnett;  "  I  con- 
sider it  more  blessed  to  give  than  to  receive — as 
regards  good  advice  anyhow." 

u  Who  will  I  have  for  dinner?"  Jack  asked 
presently,  glancing  around  to  see  if  there  were  any 
silver  tissues  or  distracting  curls  in  sight. 

"  Well,"  his  friend  replied,  rather  hesitatingly, 
"  you  must  expect  to  balance  up  for  last  night,  I 
reckon." 

"  Your  cousin,  I  suppose !  " 

Burnett  nodded. 

"  She  wanted  you,"  he  said.  "  She's  taken  a 
fancy  to  you;  and  she  can  afford  to  marry  for 
love,"  he  added. 


THE    OTHER   MAN  59 

"  I'm  thankful  that  I  can,  too,"  the  other  an- 
swered fervently. 

His  friend  laughed  at  the  fervor. 

'  You  make  me  think  of  her  teacher,"  he  said. 
"  She  sings,  and  when  she  was  sixteen  she  meant 
to  outrank  Patti ;  she  was  lots  homelier  then." 

"  Oh,  I  say !  "  Jack  cried.  "  I  can  believe  'most 
anything,  but " 

Burnett  laughed  and  then  sobered. 

"  She  was,"  he  said  solemnly;  "  she  really  and 
truly  was.  And  her  mother  said  to  her  teacher, — 
there  in  Dresden :  '  She  will  be  the  greatest  so- 
prano, won't  she?'  And  he  said:  'Madame, 
she  has  only  that  one  chance — to  be  the 
greatest.' ' 

Jack  laughed. 

"  But  why  '  Lome  '  ?  "  he  asked  suddenly. 
"  Why  not  '  Burnett,'  since  she's  your  uncle's 
child?" 

"  Oh,  that's  straight  enough ;  there's  a  hyphen 
there.  My  uncle  died  and  my  aunt  married  a  title. 
My  aunt's  Lady  Chiheleywicks,  but  the  family 
name  is  Lome.  And  you  pronounce  my  aunt's 
name  Chix." 

"  I'm  glad  I  know,"  said  Jack. 

"  Oh,  we're  great  on  titles,"  said  Burnett,  mod- 
estly. "  If  the  Boers  hadn't  killed  Col.  Rosscott, 
Betty  would  have  been  a  Lady,  too,  some  day.  But 


60     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

as  it  is — "  he  added  thoughtfully,  "  she's  nothing 
but  a  widow." 

"  '  Nothing  but ' !  "  Jack  cried  indignantly. 

"  Oh,  well,"  said  Burnett,  "  of  course  it's  great, 
her  being  a  widow — but  then  she'd  have  been  great 
the  other  way  too." 

"  But  if  he  was  English  and  a  colonel,"  Jack 
said  suddenly,  "  he  must  have  been  all  of " 

"Fifty!"  interposed  Burnett;  "oh,  he  was! 
Maybe  more,  but  he  dyed  his  hair.  It  was  a 
splendid  match  for  her.  It  isn't  every  girl  who 
can  get  a " 

Their  conversation  was  suddenly  cut  short  by 
voices,  accompanied  by  a  sort  of  sweet  and  silky 
storm  of  little  rustles  and  the  sound  of  feet — little 
feet — coming  down  the  great  hall.  Aunt  Mary's 
nephew  felt  himself  suddenly  wondering  if  any 
other  fellow  present  had  such  a  tempest  within  his 
bosom  as  he  himself  was  conscious  of  attempting 
to  regulate  unperceived. 

And  then,  after  all,  she  wasn't  among  the  in- 
flux! Miss  Maude,  was,  though,  and  he  had  to 
go  up  to  her  and  talk  to  her;  and  terribly  dull,  hard 
labor  it  was. 

While  he  was  rolling  the  Sisyphus  stone  of  con- 
versation uphill  for  the  sixth  or  seventh  time,  Jack 
noticed  a  gentleman  pass  by  and  throw  a  more  than 
ordinarily  interesting  glance  their  way.  He  was 


THE    OTHER   MAN  61 

a  very  well-built,  fairly  good-sized  man  of  thirty- 
five  or  forty  years,  with  a  handsome,  uninteresting 
face  and  heavy,  sleepy  dark  eyes. 

"  Who  is  that?  "  he  asked  of  his  companion,  his 
curiosity  supplementing  his  wish  that  she  would  be- 
gin to  bear  her  share  of  the  burden  of  her  enter- 
tainment. 

"Don't  you  know?"  she  said  in  surprise. 
"  That's  Mr.  Holloway.  He's  just  come.  Oh, 
he's  so  horrid!  I  think  he's  just  too  awfully 
horrid  for  any  use." 

"Why?" 

"  Because  he  does  such  mean  things.  I  just 
know  Bob  must  have  told  you  how  he  treated  me. 
Bob's  always  telling  it.  Surely  he's  told  you.  It's 
his  favorite  story." 

"  No,  never,"  said  Jack  (his  eyes  riveted  on 
the  staircase)  ;  "  he  never  told  me.  But  do  tell  me. 
I'll  enjoy  hearing  your  side  of  it." 

"  But  I  haven't  any  side.  It's  just  Horace  Hol- 
loway's  meanness.  There's  nothing  funny." 

"  But  tell  me  anyway." 

"  Do  you  really  want  to  hear?  " 

"  Indeed,  I  do." 

;'  Well,  it's  just  that  we  were  up  in  the  moun- 
tains, and  I  was  rowing  myself,  and  the  boat  didn't 
go  well,  and  Mr.  Holloway  came  down  off  the 
hotel  piazza  and  called  to  me  that  she  needed  bal- 


62     REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

last,  and — and  I  said:  '  Is  that  the  trouble?  '  And 
he  said :  '  Yes,  row  ashore,  and  I'll  ballast  you.' 
And  so,  of  course  I  rowed  ashore  to  get  him,  and 
(of  course,  I  supposed  he  meant  himself),  and 
when  I  was  up  by  the  dock  he  picked  up  a  great 
stone  and  dropped  it  in,  and  shoved  me  off,  and 
called  after  me :  *  She'll  go  better  now,'  and — 
everyone  laughed ! " 

Miss  Lome  stopped,  breathless. 

"  I  never  would  have  believed  it  of  him,"  Jack 
exclaimed,  turning  to  see  where  Holloway  kept  his 
sense  of  humor;  but  just  as  his  eye  fell  upon  the 
latter,  the  latter's  eyes  altered  and  suddenly  be- 
came so  bright  and  intent  that  his  observer  invol- 
untarily turned  his  own  gaze  quickly  in  the  same 
direction. 

It  was  Mrs.  Rosscott  who  was  approaching,  all 
in  cerise  with  lines  of  Chantilly  lace  sweeping 
about  her.  It  seemed  a  cruelty  to  every  woman 
present  that  she  should  be  so  beautiful.  Jack 
wanted  to  fly  and  fall  at  her  feet,  but  he  couldn't, 
of  course — he  was  tied  to  her  hyphenated  cousin. 

But  Holloway  went  forward  and  greeted  her 
with  all  possible  empressement,  and  the  man  who 
was  so  much  his  junior  felt  an  awful  weight  of 
youth  upon  him  as  he  saw  her  led  out  of  his  sight. 

"  I  think  dear  Betty  will  marry  Mr.  Holloway," 
her  cousin  chirped  blandly,  thus  settling  her  fate 


THE    OTHER   MAN  63 

forever.  "  He  came  over  in  her  party,  you  know, 
and — she's  always  been  fond  of  him." 

Jack  suddenly  recollected  how  Mrs.  Rosscott 
had  commented  on  the  terrible  tendency  to  land 
upon  "  and,"  and  wondered  why  he  had  never 
noticed  before  how  disagreeable  said  tendency  was. 

(Going  to  marry  Holloway!) 

"  But,  then,  dear  Cousin  Betty's  such  a  coquette 
that  no  one  can  ever  tell  whom  she  does  like. 
She's  very  insincere." 

Jack  twisted  uneasily.  If  there  was  any  com- 
fort to  be  derived  from  Miss  Lome's  last  speech, 
it  was  certainly  of  a  most  chilly  sort. 

(Probably  going  to  marry  Holloway!) 

"  Now,  I  think  it's  too  bad,  when  there  are  so 
many  simple,  sweet  girls  in  the  world,  that  men 
seem  to  adore  those  that  flirt  like  dear  Cousin 
Betty.  I  don't  approve  of  flirting  anyway.  I 
wouldn't  flirt  for  anything.  I  don't  want  to  break 
men's  hearts." 

"  That's  awfully  good  of  you,"  Jack  said,  look- 
ing eagerly  to  where  Holloway  and  Mrs.  Rosscott 
stood  together. 

"  Oh,  no  it  isn't,"  said  Miss  Lome,  "  I  don't 
take  any  credit  for  it — I  was  born  so.  Dear 
Betty  was  a  regular  flirt  when  she  was  ever  so 
small,  but  I  never  was.  I'm  sincere  and  I  can't 
take  any  credit  for  it.  I  was  born  so." 


64     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Holloway  was  talking  and  Mrs.  Rosscott's  eyes 
were  uplifted  to  his.  Jack  was  sure  there  was 
adoration  in  them.  He  knew  Holloway  was  in 
love  with  her.  How  could  he  be  a  man  and  help 
it.  Oh,  it  was  damnable — unbearable. 

He  stood  up  suddenly.  He  couldn't  help  it. 
He  was  crazed,  maddened,  choked,  stifled.  The 
fates  must  intervene  and  rescue  his  reason  or 
else 

There  was  a  blessed  sound — the  announcing  of 
dinner. 

•  •  •  •  • 

Later  there  was  music  in  the  great  white  salon 
where  the  organ  was.  Maude  Lome  sang,  and 
the  man  with  the  monocle  accompanied  her  on  the 
organ.  Mrs.  Rosscott  sat  on  a  divan  between 
Holloway  and  General  Jiggs.  Jack  was  left  out 
in  the  cold. 

(Surely  in  love  with  Holloway!) 

It  was  only  twenty-six  hours  since  he  had  first 
met  her,  and  he  hated  to  consider  his  life  as  unal- 
terably blasted,  or  to  even  give  up  the  fight. 
Nevertheless,  whenever  he  looked  across  the  room 
he  saw  fresh  signs  of  the  most  awful  kind.  Even 
the  way  that  she  didn't  trouble  to  trouble  over  the 
one  man,  but  devoted  herself  to  General  Jiggs,  was 
in  itself  a  very  bad  portent.  Well,  such  was  life 
and  one  must  bear  it  somehow  and  be  a  man, 


THE    OTHER   MAN  65 

Probably  he  would  suffer  less  after  the  first  five  or 
ten  years — he  hoped  so  at  any  rate.  But,  great 
heavens,  what  a  fearful  prospect  until  those  first 
five  or  ten  years  were  gone  by  1 

Finally  he  went  up  to  his  own  room  and  put  on 
another  collar  and  sat  down  at  the  open  window 
and  thought  about  it  for  a  good  while  all  quiet  and 
alone  by  himself.  After  that  he  went  back  down- 
stairs. 

She  was  gone,  and  Holloway,  too.  He  felt 
freshly  unhappy.  When  you  come  to  con- 
sider, it  was  so  damned  unjust  for  one  man  to  be 
thirty-five  while  another — just  as  decent  a  fellow 
in  every  way — was  in  college.  He 

A  hand  touched  his  arm. 

He  turned  from  where  he  was  standing  in  the 
window  recess,  and  looked  into  her  eyes. 

"  I'm  very  wicked,  am  I  not?  "  she  asked,  look- 
ing up  at  him  so  straight  and  honest. 

"  I  can't  admit  that,"  he  replied. 

"  But  I  am.  I  know  it  myself.  What  Bob 
told  you  was  all  true.  I'm  a  heartless  wretch." 

She  spoke  so  earnestly  that  his  heart  sank  lower 
and  lower. 

"  I  wanted  to  speak  to  you  about  to-morrow 
morning,"  she  said,  after  a  little  pause.  "  You 
know  we  were  going  to  drive  at  ten  together,  and 
— and  I  wondered  if — you  see,  Mr.  Holloway 's 


66     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

an  old  friend,  and  he's  had  so  much  to  tell  me  to- 
night, and  he  isn't  half  through " 

She  was  drawing  him  with  a  chain,  a  hair  chain, 
which  she  had  woven  out  of  her  eyelashes  in  the 
twinkling  of  an  eye  (either  eye) . 

He  felt  himself  helpless — and  choked. 

"  Of  course  I  don't  mind.  You  go  with  him. 
It's  quite  one  to  me." 

She  gave  a  tiny  little  start. 

"  Oh,  I  didn't  mean  that  at  all,"  she  cried.  "  I 
meant — I  meant — you  see  it's  all  been  a  little  tir- 
ing— and  to-morrow's  Sunday  anyway  and  I — I 
wanted  to — to  ask  you  if  we  couldn't  go  out  at 
eleven  instead  of  ten?  " 

She  looked  so  sweetly  questioning,  and  his  relief 
was  so  great,  and  his  joy 

(Probably  don't  care  a  rap  for  Holloway!) 

— so  intense,  that  he  could  hardly  refrain  from 
seizing  her  in  his  arms. 

But  he  only  seized  her  little  hand  instead  and 
pressed  it  fervently  to  his  lips.  When  he  raised 
his  eyes  she  was  smiling,  and  her  smile  filled  him 
with  happiness. 

"  You're  such  a  boy !  "  she  said  softly,  and 
turned  and  left  him  there  in  the  window  recess 
alone  again, — but  this  time  he  didn't  care. 


Chapter  Seven 

DEVELOPMENTS 

IT  was  during  that  drive  the  next  morning  that 
Jack  buoyed  up  by  memories  of  Saturday  and 
hopes  of  coming  Saturdays,  poured  out  the 
history  of  his  life  at  Mrs.  Rosscott's  knees.     He 
told  her  the  whole  story  of  Aunt  Mary,  and  his  side 
of  the  cat,  the  cabman,  and  Kalamazoo.     It  inter- 
ested her,  for  she  had  arrived  too  recently  to  have 
had  the  full  details  in  the  newspapers  beforehand, 
but  when  he  spoke  of  Aunt  Mary's  last  letter  she 
grew  large-eyed  and  shook  her  head  gravely. 

"  You  will  have  to  be  very  good  now,"  she  said 
seriously. 

"  Why?  "  he  asked.  "  Just  to  keep  from  being 
disinherited?  That  wouldn't  be  so  awful." 

"Wouldn't  it  be  awful  to  you?"  she  asked, 
turning  her  bright  eyes  upon  him.  "  What  could 
be  worse?  " 

'  Things,"  he  said  very  vaguely. 

Then  she  touched  up  the  cob  a  little;  and, after 
a  minute  or  two,  as  she  said  nothing,  he  continued : 

"  I  almost  fancy  quitting  college  and  going  to 
work.  I  was  thinking  about  it  last  night," 

67 


68     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

She  touched  up  the  cob  a  little  more,  and 
remained  silent. 

Finally  he  said : 

"  What  would  you  think  of  my  doing  that?  " 

"  I  don't  know,"  she  said  slowly.  "  You  see, 
I'm  a  great  philosopher.  I  never  fret  or  worry, 
because. I  regard  it  as  useless;  similarly,  I  never 
rebel  at  the  way  fate  shapes  my  life — I  regard  that 
as  something  past  helping.  I  believe  in  predes- 
tination ;  do  you  ?  " 

She  turned  and  looked  at  him  so  seriously — so 
unlike  her  riante  self — that  he  felt  startled,  and  did 
not  know  what  to  say  for  a  minute. 

Then: 

"  I  don't  know,"  he  said  slowly;  "  I  don't  know 
that  I  dare  to.  It  rather  startles  me  to  think  that 
maybe  all  of  our  future  is  laid  out  now." 

"  It  doesn't  startle  me,"  she  said.  "  It  seems 
to  me  the  natural  plan  of  the  universe.  I  believe 
that  everything  that  crosses  our  path — down  to 
the  tiniest  gnat — comes  there  in  the  fulfillment  of 
a  purpose." 

"  I'm  sure  that  all  the  mosquitoes  that  ever 
crossed  my  path  came  there  in  the  fulfillment  of  a 
purpose,"  Jack  interrupted.  "  I  never  doubted 
that:1 

She  smiled  a  little. 

"  Jt's  the  same  with  people,"  she  went  on. 


"  '  Do  not  let  us  play  any  longer,'  she  said.      '  Let  us  be  in  earnest.'  " 


DEVELOPMENTS  69 

"  Only  less  painful,"  he  interrupted  again. 

"  Sometimes  not,"  she  said,  with  a  look  that 
silenced  him.  "  Sometimes  much  more  so — my 
Cousin  Maude,  for  example." 

"  Hip,  hip,  hurrah  for  the  mosquito!  "  he  mur- 
mured. They  laughed  softly  together.  Then 
she  grew  earnest,  and  looked  so  grave  that  he  be- 
came serious  too. 

"  There  is  always  a  purpose,"  she  said,  with  a 
touch  of  some  feeling  which  he  had  never  guessed 
at.  "  If  you  and  I  have  met,  it  is  because  we  are 
to  have  some  influence  over  one  another.  I  can't 
just  see  how ;  I  can't  form  any  idea " 

"  I  can,"  he  said  eagerly. 

She  looked  up  so  suddenly  and  steadily  that  he 
was  silent. 

"  Do  not  let  us  play  any  longer,"  she  said. 
"  Let  us  be  in  earnest." 

"  But  I  am  in  earnest,"  he  asseverated. 

"  You  don't  know  what  I  mean,"  she  went  on 
very  gently.  "  You're  in  college.  Let's  fight  it 
out  on  those  lines  if  it  takes  all  summer." 

He  looked  up  into  her  face  and  loved  her  better 
than  ever  for  the  frank  kindliness  that  shone  in 
her  eyes. 

"  All  right,  if  you  say  so,"  he  vowed. 

"  I  do  say  so,"  she  said.  "  I  like  to  see  men 
stick  it  through  in  college  if  they  begin.  I  like  to 


70     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

see  people  finish  up  every  one  of  life's  jobs  that  they 
set  out  on." 

"  But  I'm  coming  to  see  you  in  town,  you  know," 
he  went  on  with  great  apparent  irrelevance. 

She  laughed  merrily. 

"  Yes,  surely.  You  must  promise  me  that. — 
No,"  she  stopped  and  looked  thoughtful,  "  I'll  tell 
you  what  I  want  you  to  promise  me.  Promise  me 
that  you'll  come  once  a  week  or  else  write  me  why 
you  can't  come.  Will  you  ?  " 

"  You  can't  suppose  that  you'll  ever  see  my  hand- 
writing under  such  circumstances — can  you?  "  Jack 
asked. 

She  laughed  again. 

"  Is  it  a  promise?  " 

"  Yes,  it's  a  promise." 

Oh,  joy  unmeasured  in  the  time  of  spring!  No 
other  February  like  that  had  ever  been  for  them — 
nor  ever  would  be.  The  drive  came  to  an  end,  the 
day  came  to  an  end,  but  the  good-nights,  which 
were  good-bys,  too,  were  not  so  fraught  with  hope- 
lessness as  he  had  dreaded,  for  the  promise  asked 
and  given  paved  a  broad  road  illuminated  by  the 
most  hopeful  kind  of  stars, — a  broad  road  leading 
straight  from  college  to  town, — and  his  fancy 
showed  him  a  figure  treading  it  often.  A  figure 
that  was  his  own. 


Chapter  Eight 

THE  RESOLUTION  HE  TOOK 

THAT  first  meeting  was  in  February,  you 
know,  and  by  the  last  of  April  it  had  been 
followed  by  so  many  others  that  Burnett 
remarked  one  day  to  his  chum : 

"  Say,  aren't  you  going  a  little  faster  than 
auntie'll  stand  for?  " 

Jack  turned  in  surprise. 

"  I  never  went  so  straight  in  my  life  before,"  he 
exclaimed,  not  in  indignation  but  in  astonishment. 

"  I  didn't  mean  that,"  said  Burnett.  "  Perhaps 
instead  of  '  auntie  '  I  should  have  said  '  Betty.'  ' 

Jack  hoisted  the  colors  of  Harvard,  and  was 
silent. 

"  I  warned  you  at  first  that  that  was  Tangle 
town,"  his  friend  went  on.  "  Don't  suppose  I'm 
saying  anything  against  her — or  against  you;  but 
she's  just  as  much  to  ten  other  men  as  she  is  to  you, 
and  they  all  are  old  enough  to  carry  lots  of 
weight." 

"  And  I  suppose  I'm  not,"  Jack  answered,  going 
over  by  the  fireplace.  "  I  know  that  as  well  as 
anyone,  of  course." 

71 


72     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Natiirlich"  said  Burnett,  with  conclusiveness 
that  was  not  meant  to  be  cruel,  yet  cut  like  a  two- 
edged  knife. 

There  was  silence  in  the  room.  Jack  stood  by 
the  chimney-piece,  his  hands  upraised  to  rest  upon 
its  lofty  shelf,  his  head  dropped  forward,  and  his 
eyes  fixed  on  the  empty  blackness  below. 

"  I  wonder,"  he  said  at  last,  "  I  wonder  what 
will  become  of  me  if — if " 

He  stopped. 

Burnett  didn't  speak. 

"  I  wonder  if  she  thinks  of  me  as  a  boy,"  the 
young  man  continued.  "  I  wonder  if  she's  so 
good  to  me  because  I'm  her  youngest  brother's 
friend." 

Burnett  did  not  comment  on  this  speech. 

"  I  don't  know  what  to  do,"  the  other  said. 
"  When  I  first  met  her  I  wanted  to  cut  college  and 
get  out  in  the  world  and  go  to  work  like  a  man.  I 
told  her  so.  But  she  wanted  me  to  stay  in  college, 
and  as  it  was  the  first  thing  she'd  ever  wanted  of 
me,  I  did  it.  I'd  do  anything  she  asked  me.  I've 
quit  drinking.  I'm  going  at  everything  as  hard  as 
it's  in  me  to  go ;  but — I  don't  know — I  feel — I  feel 
as  if  it  isn't  me — it's  just  because  she  wants  me  to, 
and,  do  you  know,  old  man,  it  frightens  me  to 
think  how — if  she — if  she  went  out  of  my — my 
life " 


THE   RESOLUTION    HE    TOOK          73 

He  stopped  and  his  broken  phrases  were  not 
continued  to  any  ending. 

Another  long  silence  ensued. 

It  was  finally  terminated  by  the  brother's  saying: 
'  You  must  confess,  old  man,  that  you  aren't 
fixed  so  as  to  be  able  to  say  one  really  serious  word 
to  any  woman — unless  it  is,  4  Wait.'  ' 

"I  know  that,"  Jack  answered;  "but  I  sup- 
pose  " 

"  She'd  be  taking  so  many  chances,"  the  friend 
interrupted.  "  A  man  in  college  is  never  the  real 
thing.  You'd  better  give  it  up." 

Then  the  other  whirled  about  and  faced 
him. 

"  Give  it  up,  did  you  say?  "  he  asked  almost 
angrily. 

"  Yes,  that's  what." 

For  a  minute  they  looked  at  one  another.    Then : 

"  I  shall  never  give  it  up,"  the  lover  said  very 
slowly  and  steadily — "  never,  until  she  gives  me 
up." 

Burnett  sucked  in  his  breath  with  a  sudden  com- 
pression of  his  lips. 

"  All  right,"  he  said,  not  unkindly;  "  but  I  don't 
believe  you'll  ever  get  her,  and  that's  flat.  There 
are  too  many  being  entered  for  that  race,  and  long 
before  you  and  I  get  out  of  here  she'll  be  Mrs. 
Somebody  Else." 


74     REJUVENATION   OF  AUNT  MARY 

Jack  stared  at  him  as  if  he  hardly  heard,  and 
then  suddenly  he  stepped  nearer  and  spoke. 

"  Did  she  ask  you  to  have  this  talk  with  me?  " 

"  No,"  said  the  brother  in  surprise,  "  she  never 
says  anything  about  you  to  me." 

A  look  of  relief  fled  across  his  friend's  face,  and 
then  a  look  of  resolution  succeeded  it. 

"I'm  not  going  to  be  discouraged,"  he  said; 
"  not  for  a  while,  at  any  rate." 

"  You'd  better  be." 

Jack  laughed.  The  laugh  sounded  a  trifle  hol- 
low, but  still  it  was  a  laugh,  and  that  in  itself  was 
a  triumph  of  which  none  but  himself  might  ever 
measure  the  extent. 

Because  in  that  moment  he  decided  to  lay  the 
whole  case  before  her  the  next  time  that  he  went  to 
town,  and  the  coming  to  a  resolution  was  a  relief 
from  the  uncertainty  that  clouded  his  days  and 
nights — even  if  a  further  black  curtain  of  darkest 
doubt  hung  before  the  possibilities  of  what  her 
answer  might  be. 


Chapter  Nine 

THE      DOWNFALL      OF      HOPE 

IT  was  on  a  Saturday  about  the  middle  of  May 
that  Jack  came  to  town,  his  mind  well  braced 
with  love  and  arguments,  and  his  main 
thoughts  being  that  when  he  returned  something 
would  be  settled. 

It  was  a  beautiful  day,  warm  and  sunny,  and  at 
five  in  the  afternoon  both  of  the  drawing-room 
windows  of  Mrs.  Rosscott's  house  were  wide  open, 
and  the  lace  curtains  were  taking  the  breeze  like 
little  sails. 

Just  as  Jack  mounted  the  steps,  the  door  opened, 
and  a  plainly  dressed,  unattractive-looking  man 
was  let  out.  The  servant  who  did  the  letting  out 
saw  Jack  and  let  him  in  without  closing  the  door 
between  the  egress  of  the  one  and  the  ingress  of 
the  other.  So  he  entered  without  ringing,  and,  as 
he  was  very  well  known  and  intensely  popular  with 
all  of  Mrs.  Rosscott's  servants,  the  man  invited 
him  to  walk  up  unannounced,  since  he  himself  was 
just  "  bringing  in  the  tea." 

Jack  went  upstairs,  and  because  the  carpet  .was 
of  thickly  piled  velvet  and  his  boots  were  the  boots 

75 


76     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

of  a  well-shod  gentleman,  he  made  no  noise  what- 
ever in  the  so  doing. 

There  were  double  parlors  above  stairs  in  the 
domicile  which  Burnett's  sister  had  taken  until 
July,  and  they  were  furnished  in  the  most  correct 
and  trying  mode  of  Louis  XIV.  The  chairs  were 
gilt  and  very  uncomfortable.  The  ornaments 
were  all  straight  up  and  down  and  made  in  such 
shapes  that  there  was  no  place  to  flick  off  ciga- 
rette ashes  anywhere.  Nothing  could  be  pulled  up 
to  anything  else  and  there  was  not  a  single  good 
place  to  rest  one's  elbows  anywhere.  The  only 
saving  grace  in  the  situation  was  that  after  five 
minutes  or  so  Mrs.  Rosscott  invariably  suggested 
removal  to  the  library  which  lay  beyond — a  very 
different  species  of  apartment  where  no  mode  at  all 
prevailed  except  the  terrible  demode  thing  known 
as  comfort.  To  prevent  her  visitors,  when  seated 
(for  the  five  minutes  aforementioned)  amid  the 
correct  carving  of  French  art,  from  looking  long- 
ingly through  at  the  easy-chairs  of  American  man- 
ufacture, Mrs.  Rosscott  had  ordered  that  the  blue 
velvet  portieres  which  hung  between  should  never 
be  pushed  aside,  and  it  was  owing  to  this  order  that 
Jack,  entering  the  drawing-room,  heard  voices,  but 
could  not  see  into  the  library  beyond.  Also  it 
was  owing  to  this  order  that  those  in  the  library 
could  not  see  or  hear  Jack. 


THE   DOWNFALL   OF   HOPE  77 

The  result  was  that  the  young  man,  finding  the 
drawing-room  unoccupied,  was  just  crossing 
toward  the  blue  velvet  curtains,  intending  to  wait 
in  the  library  until  the  returning  servant  should 
advise  him  of  the  whereabouts  of  his  mistress,  when 
he  was  stopped  by  suddenly  hearing  a  voice — her 
voice — crying  (and  laughing  at  the  same  time)  — 
"  Kisses  barred!  Kisses  barred!  " 

It  may  be  understood  that  had  Mrs.  Rosscott 
known  that  anyone  was  within  hearing  she  certainly 
would  never  have  made  any  such  speech,  and  it 
may  be  further  understood  that,  had  whoever  was 
with  her,  also  mistrusted  the  close  propinquity  of 
another  man,  he  would  never  have  replied  (as  he 
did  reply)  : 

"  Certainly,"  the  same  being  spoken  in  a  most 
calm  and  careless  tone. 

Jack,  the  eavesdropper,  stood  transfixed  at  the 
voices  and  speeches,  and  forgot  every  other  con- 
sideration in  the  overwhelming  sickness  of  soul 
which  overcame  him  that  instant.  All  his  other 
soul-sicknesses  were  trifles  compared  to  this  one, 
and  the  world — his  world — their  world — seemed 
to  revolve  and  whirl  and  turn  upside  down,  as  he 
steadied  himself  against  a  spindle-legged  cabinet 
and  felt  its  spindle-legs  trembling  in  sympathy  with 
his  own. 

"  Darling,"  said  Holloway,  a    second    or    two 


78     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

later  (and  this  time  his  voice  was  not  calm  and 
careless,  but  deep  and  impassioned) ,  "  the'  letter 
was  very  sweet,  and  if  you  knew  how  I  longed  to 
take  the  tired  little  girl  to  my  bosom  and  comfort 
her  troubles,  and  replace  them  by  joys !  " 

'Will  that  day  ever  come,  do  you  think?" 
Mrs.  Rosscott  answered,  in  low  tones,  which  never- 
theless were  most  painfully  clear  and  distinct  in 
the  next  room. 

"  It  must,"  Holloway  replied,  "  just  as  surely 
as  that  I  hold  this  dear  little  hand " 

But  Jack  never  knew  more.  He  had  heard 
enough — more  than  enough.  Four  thousand  times 
too  much.  He  turned  and  went  out  of  the  rooms, 
back  down  the  stairs  and  out  of  the  door,  closed  it 
noiselessly  behind  him,  and  found  himself  in  a 
world  which,  although  bright  and  sunny  to  all  the 
rest  of  mankind,  had  turned  dark,  lonely,  and 
cheerless  to  him. 

At  first  he  hardly  knew  what  to  do  with  himself, 
he  was  so  altogether  used  up  by  the  discovery  just 
made.  He  drifted  up  and  down  some  unknown 
streets  for  an  hour  or  two — or  stood  still  on  cor- 
ners— he  never  was  very  sure  which.  And  then 
at  last  he  went  downtown  and  took  a  drink  in  a 
half-dazed  way;  and  because  it  was  quite  two 
months  since  his  last  indulgence,  its  suggestion  was 
potent. 


THE    DOWNFALL   OF   HOPE  79 

The  pity — or  rather,  the  apparent  pity — of 
what  followed! 

Burnett  was  Sundaying  at  the  ancestral  castle; 
and  Burnett  wasn't  the  warning  sort,  anyhow.  He 
was  always  tow  and  pitch  for  any  species  of  flame. 
So  his  absence  counted  for  nothing  in  the  crisis. 

And  what  ensued  was  a  crisis — a  crisis  with  a 
vengeance. 

That  tear  upon  which  Aunt  Mary's  nephew  went 
was  something  lurid  and  awful.  It  lasted  until 
Monday,  and  then  its  owner  returned  to  college, 
as  ill  of  body  and  as  embittered  of  spirit  as  it  was 
in  him  to  be.  The  lightsome  devil  who  had  ruled 
him  up  to  his  meeting  with  Mrs.  Rosscott  resumed 
its  sway  with  terrible  force.  The  authorities 
showed  a  tendency  to  patience  because  young  Den- 
ham  had  appeared  to  reform  lately  and  had  been 
working  hard;  but  young  Denham  felt  no  thankful 
sentiments  for  their  leniency,  and  proved  his  posi- 
tion shortly. 

There  was  a  man  named  Tweedwell  whom  cir- 
cumstances threw  directly  in  the  path  of  destruc- 
tion. Tweedwell  was  an  inoffensive  mortal  who 
was  studying  for  the  ministry.  He  was  progress- 
ive in  his  ideas,  and  believed  that  a  clergyman,  to 
hold  a  great  influence,  should  know  his  world. 
He  thought  that  knowledge  of  the  world  was  to  be 
gained  by  skirting  the  outside  edge  of  every 


80     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

species  of  worldliness.  The  result  of  this  course 
of  action  was  not  what  it  should  have  been,  for 
Tweedwell  was  an  easy  mark  for  all  who  wanted 
fun,  and  the  consciousness  of  his  innocence  so  little 
accelerated  the  pace  at  which  he  got  out  of  the  way 
that  he  was  always  being  called  to  account  for  what 
he  hadn't  done. 

The  Saturday  night  after  his  Saturday  in  town, 
Jack  concocted  a  piece  of  deviltry  which  was  as 
dangerous  as  it  was  foolish.  The  result  was  that 
an  explosion  took  place,  and  the  author  of  the  gun- 
powder plot  had  all  the  skin  on  both  hands  blis- 
tered. Burnett,  in  escaping,  fell  and  broke  his 
collarbone  and  two  ribs.  The  house  in  which  the 
affair  took  place  caught  fire,  and  was  badly  dam- 
aged. And  Tweedwell  was  arrested  on  the 
strongest  kind  of  circumstantial  evidence,  and  had 
to  answer  for  the  whole.  Naturally,  in  the  inves- 
tigation that  followed,  the  two  who  were  guilty 
had  to  confess  or  see  the  candidate  for  the  minis- 
try disgraced  forever. 

The  result  of  their  confession  was  that  Burnett's 
father,  a  jovial,  peppery  old  gentleman — we  all 
know  the  kind — lost  his  patience  and  wrote  his  son 
that  he'd  better  not  come  home  again  that  year. 
But  Aunt  Mary  lost  her  temper  much  more  com- 
pletely and  the  result,  as  affecting  Jack,  was  awful. 

She  might  not  have  acted  as  she  did  had  the  dis- 


THE   DOWNFALL   OF   HOPE  81 

astrous  news  arrived  either  a  week  later  or  a  week 
earlier;  but  it  came  just  in  the  middle  of  a  discour- 
aging ten  days'  downpour,  which  had  caused  a  dam 
to  break  and  a  chain  of  valuable  cranberry  bogs  to 
be  drowned  out  for  that  year.  The  cranberry  bogs 
were  especially  dear  to  their  owner's  heart. 

"Why  can't  they  drain  'em?"  she  had  asked 
Lucinda,  who  was  particularly  nutcracker-like  in 
appearance  since  her  quarantine  episode. 

'  'Pears  like  they're  lower'n  everywhere  else," 
Lucinda  answered,  her  words  sounding  as  if  she 
had  sharpened  them  on  a  grindstone. 

Aunt  Mary  bit  her  lip  and  frowned  at  the  rain. 
She  felt  mad  all  the  way  through,  and  longed  to 
take  it  out  on  someone. 

Ten  minutes  after  Joshua  arrived  with  the  mail 
and  the  mail  bore  one  ominous  letter.  Joshua  felt 
something  was  wrong  before  the  fact  was  assured. 

"  She  wants  the  mail,"  Lucinda  said,  coming  to 
the  door  with  her  hand  out  as  usual. 

"  She'll  get  the  mail,"  said  Joshua,  and  as  he 
spoke  he  gave  the  seeker  after  tidings  a  blood- 
curdling wink. 

"  There  isn't  a  telegram  in  one  o'  the  letters,  is 
there?"  Lucinda  asked,  much  appalled  by  the 
wink. 

"  No,  there  isn't  no  telegram  in  none  o'  the  let- 
ters," said  Joshua. 


82     REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Joshua  Whittlesey,  I  do  believe  you  was  born 
to  drive  saints  mad.  What  is  the  matter?  " 

"  Nothin'  ain't  the  matter  as  I  know  of." 

"  Then  what  in  Kingdom  Come  did  you  wink 
for?" 

"  I  winked,"  said  Joshua  meaningly,  "  cause  I 
expect  it'll  be  a  good  while  before  we'll  feel  like 
winkin'  again." 

Lucinda  gave  him  a  look  in  which  curiosity  and 
aggravation  fought  catch-as-catch-can.  Then  she 
turned  and  went  in  with  the  letters. 

Aunt  Mary  was  sitting  stonily  staring  at  the 
rain. 

"  I  thought  you'd  gone  to  take  a  drive  with 
Joshua,"  she  said  coldly.  "  Well,  's  long  's  you're 
back  I'll  be  glad  to  have  my  mail.  Most  folks  like 
to  get  their  mail  as  soon  as  it  comes  an'  I — Mercy 
on  us!  " 

It  was  the  letter  from  the  authorities  enclosed 
in  one  from  Mr.  Stebbins. 

Lucinda  stood  bolt  upright  before  her  mistress. 

"What's  happened?"  she  yelled  breathlessly, 
after  a  few  seconds  of  the  direst  kind  of  silence 
had  loaded  the  atmosphere  while  the  letter  was 
being  carefully  read. 

Then: 

"  Happened ! — "  said  Aunt  Mary,  transfixing 
the  terrible  typewritten  communication  with  a  yet 


THE    DOWNFALL   OF   HOPE  83 

more  terrible  look  of  determination.  "  Hap- 
pened!— Well,  jus'  what  I  expected  's  happened 
an'  jus'  what  nobody  expects  '11  happen  now.  Lu- 
cinda,  you  run  like  you  was  paid  for  it  and  tell 
Joshua  not  to  unharness.  Don't  stop  to  open  your 
mouth.  You'll  need  your  breath  before  you  get  to 
the  barn.  Scurry!  " 

Lucinda  scurried.  She  splashed  and  spattered 
down  through  the  lane  that  led  to  Joshua's  king- 
dom with  a  vigor  that  was  commendable  in  one  of 
her  age. 

"  She  says  '  don't  unharness,' '  she  panted, 
bouncing  in  through  the  doorway  just  as  Joshua 
was  slowly  and  carefully  folding  the  lap-robe  in  the 
crease  to  which  it  had  become  habituated. 

Joshua  continued  to  fold. 

"  Then  I  won't  unharness,"  he  said  calmly.  He 
hung  the  robe  over  the  line  that  was  stretched  to 
hang  robes  over  and  Lucinda  gasped  for  wind  with 
which  to  inflate  further  conversation. 

"  She  says  what  nobody  expects  is  goin'  to  hap- 
pen," she  panted  as  soon  as  she  could. 

''  What  nobody  expects  is  always  happenin' 
where  he's  concerned,"  said  Joshua. 

"  I  s'pose  he's  in  some  new  row,"  said  Lucinda. 

"  I'm  sure  he  is,"  said  Joshua,  "  an'  if  you  don't 
go  back  to  her  pretty  quick  you  won't  be  no  better 
off." 


84     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Lucinda  turned  away  and  returned  to  the  house. 
She  found  Aunt  Mary  still  staring  at  the  letters 
with  the  same  concentrated  fury  as  before. 

"  Well,  is  Joshua  a'comin'  to  the  door?  "  she 
asked  when  she  saw  her  maid  before  her. 

"  You  didn't  say  for  him  to  come  to  the  door," 
Lucinda  howled,  "  you  said  for  him  to  stay  har- 
nessed." 

Aunt  Mary  appeared  on  the  verge  of  ignition. 

"  Lucinda,"  she  said,  "  every  week  I  live  under 
the  same  roof  with  you  your  brains  strike  me  's 
some  shrunk  from  the  week  before.  What  in 
Heaven's  name  should  I  want  Joshua  to  stay  har- 
nessed in  the  barn  for?  I  want  him  to  go  for  Mr. 
Stebbins  an'  I  want  him  to  understand  't  if  Mr. 
Stebbins  can't  come  he's  got  to  come  just  the  same's 
if  he  could  anyhow.  I  may  seem  quiet  to  you, 
Lucinda,  but  if  I  do,  it  only  shows  all  over  again 
how  little  you  know.  This  is  a  awful  day  an'  if 
you  knew  how  awful  you'd  be  half  way  back  to 
the  barn  right  now.  I  ain't  triflin' — I'm  meanin' 
every  word.  Every  syllable.  Every  letter." 

Lucinda  fled  out  into  the  open  again.  Her  foot- 
prints of  the  time  before  were  little  oblong  ponds 
now  and  she  laid  out  a  new  course*parallel  to  their 
splashes.  She  found  Joshua  sponging  the  dasher. 

"  She  wants  you  to  go  straight  out  again." 

Joshua  flung  the  sponge  into  the  pail. 


THE   DOWNFALL   OF   HOPE  85 

"  Then  I'll  go  straight  out  again,"  he  said,  mov- 
ing toward  the  horse's  head. 

"  You're  to  bring  Mr.  Stebbins  whether  he  can 
come  or  not." 

"  He'll  come,"  said  Joshua;  and  then  he  backed 
the  horse  so  suddenly  that  the  buggy  wheel  nearly 
went  over  Lucinda. 

"  She  says  this  is  an  awful  day "  began 

Lucinda. 

Joshua  got  into  the  buggy  and  tucked  the  rubber 
blanket  around  himself. 

«  She  says " 

Joshua  drove  out  of  the  barn  and  away. 

Lucinda  went  slowly  back  to  the  house.  Aunt 
Mary  had  ceased  to  glare  at  the  letter  and  was  now 
glaring  at  the  rain  instead. 

"  Lucinda,"  she  said  "  I'll  thank  you  not  to  ever 
mention  my  nephew  to  me  again.  I've  took  a 
vow  to  never  speak  his  name  again  myself.  By  no 
means — not  at  all — never." 

"  Which  nephew?  "  shrieked  Lucinda. 

Aunt  Mary's  eyes  snapped. 

"Jack!  "  she  said,  with  an  accent  that  seemed 
to  split  the  short  word  in  two. 

After  a  little  she  spoke  again. 

"  Lucinda,  it's  all  been  owin'  to  the  city  an'  this 
last  is  all  city.  'F  I  cared  a  rap  what  happened  to 
him  after  this  I'd  never  let  him  go  near  a  place 


36     REJUVENATION   OF  AUNT  MARY 

over  two  thousand  again  as  long  as  he  lived.  It's 
no  use  tryin'  to  explain  things  to  you,  Lucinda, 
because  it  never  has  been  any  use  an'  never  will  be 
— an'  anyway,  I'm  done  with  it  all.  I  sh'll  want 
you  for  a  witness  when  I'm  through  with  Mr. 
Stebbins,  and  then  you  can  get  some  marmalade  out 
for  tea  an'  we'll  all  live  in  peace  hereafter." 

Joshua  returned  with  Mr.  Stebbins  and  the  latter 
gentleman  went  to  work  with  a  will  and  willed 
Jack  out  of  Aunt  Mary's.  Later  Joshua  took  him 
home  again.  Lucinda  got  the  marmalade  out  of 
the  cellar  and  Aunt  Mary  had  it  with  her  tea.  It 
was  a  bitter  tea — unsugared  indeed — and  the  days 
that  followed  matched. 


Chapter  Ten 

THE  WOES  OF  THE  DISINHERITED. 

IT  was  some  days  later  on  in  the  world's  his- 
tory that  Holloway  was  calling  on  Bertha 
Rosscott. 

They  were  sitting  in  that  comfortable  library 
previously  referred  to,  and  were  sweetly  unaware 
that  any  untoward  series  of  incidents  had  ever  led 
to  an  invasion  of  their  privacy. 

Holloway  lay  well  back  in  a  sleepy-hollow  chair 
and  looked  indolently,  lazily  handsome;  his  hostess 
was  up  on — well  up  on  the  divan,  and  he  had  the 
full  benefit  of  her  admirable  bottines  and  their 
dainty  heels  and  buckles. 

"  Honestly,"  he  said,  looking  her  over  with  a 
gaze  that  was  at  once  roving  and  well  con- 
tent, "  honestly,  I  think  that  every  time  I  see 
you,  you  appear  more  attractive  than  the  time 
before." 

"  It's  very  nice  of  you  to  say  so,"  she  replied. 
"  And,  of  course,  I  believe  you,  for  every  time  that 
I  get  a  new  gown  I  think  that  very  same  thing  my- 
self. Still,  I  do  regard  it  as  strange  if  I  look 

87 


88     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

nicely  to-day,  for  I've  been  crying  like  a  baby  all 
the  morning." 

"  You  crying!     And  why?  " 

She  raised  her  eyes  to  his. 

"  Such  bad  news !  "  she  said   simply. 

"  From  where?     Of  whom?  " 

"  From  mamma,  about  Bob." 

"Have  his  wounds  proved  serious?"  Hollo- 
way  looked  slightly  distressed  as  was  proper. 

"  It  isn't  that.  It's  papa.  Papa  has  forbidden 
him  the  house.  He's  very,  very  angry." 

Holloway  looked  relieved. 

"  Your  father  won't  stay  angry  long,  and  you 
know  it,"  he  said.  "  Just  think  how  often  he  has 
lost  his  temper  over  the  boys  and  how  often  he's 
found  it  again." 

"  It  isn't  just  Bob,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott.  "  I've 
someone  else  on  my  mind,  too." 

"Who,  pray?" 

"  His  friend." 

"  Young  Denham?" 

"  Yes." 

With  that  she  threw  her  head  up  and  looked 
very  straightly  at  her  caller  whose  visage  shaded 
ever  so  slightly  in  spite  of  himself. 

"  Have  his  wounds  proved  serious?  "  he  asked, 
smiling,  but  unable  to  altogether  do  away  with  a 
species  of  parenthetical  inflection  in  his  voice. 


WOES   OF   THE    DISINHERITED        89 

"  It  wasn't  over  his  wounds  that  I  cried." 

"  Did  you  really  cry  at  all  for  him  ?  " 

"  I  cried  more  for  him  than  I  did  for  Bob," 
she  admitted  boldly. 

"  He  is  a  fortunate  boy!  But  why  the  tears  in 
his  case?  " 

"  I  felt  so  badly  to  be  disappointed  in  him." 

"  Did  you  expect  to  work  a  miracle  there,  my 
dear?  Did  you  think  to  reform  such  an  invet- 
erate young  reprobate  with  a  glance?  " 

"  I'm  not  sure  that  I  ever  asked  myself  either  of 
those  questions,"  she  replied,  slowly;  "but  he 
promised  me  sometking,  and  I  expected  him  to 
keep  his  word." 

"  Men  don't  keep  such  promises,  Bertha,"  the 
visitor  said.  "  You  shouldn't  have  expected  it." 

"  I  don't  know  why  not." 

"  Because  a  man  who  drinks  will  drink  again." 

"  I  didn't  refer  to  drinking,"  she  said  quietly. 
"  It  was  quite  another  thing." 

"Ah!" 

She  looked  down  at  her  rings  and  seemed  to  con- 
sider how  much  of  her  confidence  she  should  give 
him,  and  the  consideration  led  her  to  look  up  pres- 
ently and  say : 

"  He  promised  me  that  if  he  could  not  call  any 
week  he  would  write  me  a  line  instead.  He  came 
to  town  last  week,  and  he  neither  called  nor  wrote. 


90     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

That  wasn't  like  the  man  I  saw  in  him.  That  was 
a  direct  breaking  of  his  word.  I  can't  understand, 
and  I'm  disappointed." 

Holloway  took  out  his  cigarette  case  and  turned 
it  over  and  over  thoughtfully  in  his  hands. 

"  He's  nothing  but  a  boy,"  he  said  at  last,  with 
an  effort. 

"  He's  no  boy,"  she  said.  "  He's  almost  twenty- 
two  years  old.  He's  a  man." 

"  Some  are  men  at  twenty-two,  and  some  are 
boys,"  Holloway  remarked.  "  I  was  a  man  before 
I  was  eighteen — a  man  out  in  the  world  of  men. 
But  Denham's  a  boy." 

He  rose  as  he  spoke,  and  she  held  out  her  hand 
for  him  to  raise  her,  too. 

"  It's  early  to  go,"  she  remarked  parentheti- 
cally. 

"I  know,"  he  replied;  "but  I  hear  someone 
being  shown  into  the  drawing-room.  I  don't  feel 
formal  to-day,  and  if  I  can't  lounge  in  here  alone 
with  you  I'd  rather  go." 

"  How  egotistical !  "  she  commented. 

"  I  am  egotistical,"  he  admitted. 

And  went. 

The  footman  passed  him  in  the  hall;  he  had  a 
card  upon  his  silver  salver,  and  was  seeking  his 
mistress  in  the  library.  But  when  he  entered  there 
the  room  was  empty.  Mrs.  Rosscott  had  slipped 


through  the  blue  velvet  portieres,  expecting  to  see 
a  friend,  and  had  stopped  short  on  the  other  side, 
amazed  at  finding  herself  face  to  face  with  an  utter 
stranger. 

"  I  gave  the  man  my  card,"  said  the  stranger,  in 
a  tone  as  faded  as  his  mustache.  He  was  a  long, 
thin  man,  but  what  the  Germans  style  "  sehr  kor- 
rect." 

"  I  didn't  wait  to  get  it,"  the  hostess  said.  "  I 
supposed  that,  of  course,  it  was  somebody  that  I 
knew." 

"  That  was  natural,"  he  admitted. 

There  was  a  slight  pause  of  awkwardness. 

"  Won't  you  sit  down?  "  she  asked. 

"  Certainly,"  said  the  caller,  and  sat  down. 

Then  she  sat  down,  too,  and  another  awkward 
pause  ensued. 

"  You  didn't  expect  to  see  me,  did  you?  "  said 
the  stranger,  smiling. 

"  No,  I  didn't,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott  frankly. 
"  I  expected  to  see  someone  else — someone  that  I 
knew.  Nearly  all  my  visitors  are  people  whom  I 
know." 

Her  eyes  rather  demanded  an  observance  of  the 
conventionalities  while  her  words  were  putting  the 
best  face  possible  on  the  queer  five  minutes.  The 
stranger  smiled. 

"  My  name  is  Clover,"  he  said    then.     "  Of 


92     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT  MARY 

course,  as  you  never  saw  me  before,  you  want  to 
know  that  first  of  all." 

"  I'd  choose  to  know,"  she  said.  And  then  the 
uncompromising  neutrality  of  her  expression  deep- 
ened so  plainly  that  he  hastened  to  add : 

"  I'm  H.  Wyncoop  Clover." 

"  Oh !  "  she  said.  And  then  smiled,  too ;  having 
heard  the  name  before. 

"  Why  don't  you  ask  me  my  business?  "  went  on 
H.  Wyncoop  Clover.  "  I  must  have  come  for 
some  reason,  you  know." 

"  I  didn't  know  it,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott — "  I 
don't  know  anything  about  you  yet." 

They  both  smiled — and  then  H.  Wyncoop 
resumed  his  colorless  sobriety  at  once. 

"  It's  about  Jack,"  he  said — "  these  terrible  new 
developments — "  he  stopped  short,  seeing  his  vis-a- 
vis turn  deathly  white,  "  it's  nothing  to  be  fright- 
ened over,"  he  said  reassuringly. 

Mrs.  Rosscott  was  furious  with  herself  for 
having  paled.  She  became  instantly  haughty. 

"  I  was  alarmed  for  my  brother,"  she  said.  "  I 
always  think  of  them  both  as  together." 

"  Oh,  in  that  case,  I  can  reassure  you  instantly," 
said  the  caller.  "  Burnett  is  doing  finely." 

Mrs.  Rossc9tt  was  conscious  of  being  suddenly 
and  skillfully  countercharged.  She  blushed  with 
vexation,  bit  her  lip  in  perturbation,  and  cast  upon 


WOES   OF   THE   DISINHERITED       93 

the  trying  individual  opposite  a  look  of  most 
appealing  interrogation. 

"  You  see,"  said  Clover  pleasantly,  "  I  was 
coming  to  town,  so  I  came  in  handy  for  the  purpose 
of  telling  you." 

She  gave  him  a  glance  that  prayed  him  to  be 
decent  and  go  on  with  his  errand. 

"  Burnett  is  about  recovered,"  he  said. 

She  clasped  her  hands  hard. 

"  I  wouldn't  be  a  man  for  anything !  "  she 
exclaimed  with  sudden  fervor,  "  they  are  so 
awfully  mean.  Why  don't  you  go  on  and  tell  me 
what  you've  come  about?  " 

He  raised  his  eyebrows. 

"May  I?  "he  asked. 

She  choked  down  some  of  her  exasperation. 

"  Yes,  you  may." 

"  Oh,  thank  you  so  much.  I'll  begin  at  once 
then.  Only  premising  that  as  I  go  to  school  with 
your  little  brother,  and  as  he  is  rather  under  a  cloud 
just  at  present,  we  clubbed  together  to  bring  you  a 
letter  about  him  and  Jack.  He  was  going  to  dic- 
tate it,  but  in  the  end  Mitchell  wrote  it  all.  Here 
it  is." 

With  that  he  put  his  hand  into  his  pocket,  drew 
out  an  envelope  and  handed  it  to  her. 

"  How  awfully  good  of  you,"  she  said  grate- 
fully. "  Do  excuse  my  reading  it  at  once,  won't 


94     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

you?    You  see,  I've  been  so  anxious  about — about 
my  brother." 

He  nodded  understandingly,  and  she  hastily  tore 
open  the  envelope  and  ran  her  eyes  over  the  written 
sheets. 

MY  DEAR  MRS.  ROSSCOTT  : — 

Being  the  prize  writer  of  the  class,  I  am  chosen 
to  take  down  the  ante  mortem  confessions  of  our 
shattered  friends.  It  is  in  a  sad  hour  for  them  that 
I  do  so,  because  I  am  naturally  so  truthful  that  I 
shall  not  force  you  to  look  for  my  meaning 
between  the  lines.  On  the  contrary,  I  shall  set 
the  cold  facts  out  as  neatly  as  the  pickets  on  the 
fence.  And  in  evidence  thereof,  I  open  the  ball  by 
telling  you  frankly  that  they  both  look  fierce.  If 
they  had  looked  less  awful,  and  Burnett  had  had 
more  lime  in  his  bones,  we  might  have  escaped  the 
Powers  That  Be  by  simply  admitting  a  sprained 
ankle  and  carefully  concealing  everything  else. 
But  if  one  man  cracks  where  you  can't  finish 
the  deal,  even  by  the  most  unlimited  outlay 
of  mucilage  and  persistence,  and  another  blazes 
his  whole  surface-area  in  a  manner  that  seems 
to  make  the  underbrush  dubious  to  count  on 
forever  henceforth ;  why,  you  then  have  a  logarithm 
the  square  of  which  is  probably  as  far  beyond  your 
depth  as  I  am  beyond  my  own  just  at  this  point  of 
this  sentence. 

The  long  and  short  of  my  fresh  start  is,  that 
your  brother  wants  to  write  you,  but  he  is  so 
handicapped  (forgive  me,  but  you're  the  only  one 
who  hasn't  had  that  joke  sprung  on  them!)  with 
bandages,  that  it's,  cruel  to  expect  much  of  him.  It 


WOES   OF   THE    DISINHERITED        95 

is  true  that  he  has  his  bosom  friend  to  fall  back 
upon,  but  if  you  could  see  that  friend  as  we  see  him 
these  days  you  wouldn't  be  sure  whether  it  was  true 
or  not.  The  old  woman,  who  had  the  peddler- 
and-petticoat  episode,  was  not  in  it  the  same  day 
with  your  brother's  friend !  I  do  assure  you.  And 
anyhow — even  if  he  still  has  brains — his  writing 
apparatus  is  all  done  up  in  arnica,  so  there  you 
are! 

But  do  not  allow  me  to  alarm  you  unduly! 
When  all's  said  and  done,  they're  not  so  badly  off 
physically.  Hair  and  ribs  are  mere  vanities,  any- 
how, and  we're  here  to-day  and  gone  to-morrow ! 

Something  much  worse  than  disfigurements  and 
broken  bones  has  sprung  forth  from  chaos,  and  has 
almost  stared  them  out  of  countenance  since.  It  is 
the  wolf  that  is  at  the  door,  and  the  howling  and 
prowling  of  their  particular  wolf  is  not  to  be 
sneezed  at,  let  me  tell  you.  To  put  a  modern  polit- 
ical face  upon  an  ancient  Greek  fable,  the  wolf  in 
their  case  symbolizes  the  bitter  question  of  whose 
roof  is  going  to  roof  them  when  they  get  out  of  the 
plaster  casts  that  are  bed  and  board  to  them  just  at 
present.  Where  are  they  to  go  ?  All  those  which 
used  to  be  open  to  them  are  suddenly  shut  tight. 
They've  both  been  expelled,  and  both  been  disin- 
herited. If  I  was  inclined  to  look  on  the  blue  side 
of  the  blanket,  I  should  certainly  feel  that  they 
were  playing  in  very  tough  luck.  Burnett,  of 
course,  can  come  to  you,  and  his  soul  is  full  of  the 
wish  to  bring  his  fellow-fright  along  with  him. 
Which  wish  of  his  is  the  gist  of  my  epistle.  Can 
he  bring  him?  He  wants  to  know  before  he 
broaches  the  proposition.  I'm  to  be  skinned  alive 
if  Jack  ever  learns  that  such  a  plea  was  made,  so  I 


96     REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

beg  you  whatever  other  rash  acts  you  see  fit 
to  commit  during  your  meteoric  flight  across  my 
plane  of  existence,  don't  ever  give  me  away. 
Firstly,  because  if  I  ever  get  a  chance  to  do  so,  I'm 
positive  that  I  should  want  to  cling  to  you  as  the 
mistletoe  does  to  the  oak,  and  could  not  bear  to  be 
given  away;  and  secondly,  because  I'm  so  attached 
to  my  own  skin  that  I  should  really  suffer  pain  if 
it  was  taken  from  me  by  force.  Bob  wants  you  to 
think  it  over,  and  let  him  know  as  to  the  whats  and 
whens  by  return  mail. 

You  are  so  inspiring  that  I  could  write  you  all 
day,  but  those  relics  of  what  once  was,  but  alas! 
will  never  be  again,  need  to  be  rolled  up  afresh  in 
absorbent  cotton,  and  so  I  must  nail  my  Red  Cross 
on  to  my  left  arm,  and  get  down  to  business.  If 
you  saw  how  useful  I  am  to  your  brother,  you'd 
thank  his  lucky  stars  that  I  came  through  myself 
with  nothing  worse  than  getting  my  ear  stepped 
on.  I  was  hugging  the  ladder  (being  canny  and 
careful),  and  the  man  above  me  toed  in.  Isn't  it 
curious  to  think  that  if  he'd  worn  braces  in  early 
youth  my  ear  would  be  all  right  now. 

Behold  me  at  your  feet. 

Respectfully  yours, 
HERBERT  KENDRICK  MITCHELL. 

When  Mrs.  Rosscott  had  finished  the  letter  she 
looked  across  at  her  caller,  and  said: 
*  You've  read  this,  haven't  you  ?  " 

"  No,"  said  he.  "  I  tried  to  unstick  it  two  or 
three  times  coming  on  the  train,  but  it  was  too 
much  for  me." 


WOES   OF   THE    DISINHERITED        97 

"  Don't  you  really  know  what  it  says?  "  she 
asked  more  earnestly. 

"  Yes,  I  do,"  Clover  answered,  "  but  Denham 
must  never  know  that  I  do." 

"  I  won't  tell  him,"  she  said  smiling  faintly. 
"  But  surely  he  can't  be  as  badly  off  as  this  says. 
Has  he  really  lost  all  his  hair?  " 

"  Not  all — only  in  spots,"  Clover  reassured 
her;  but  then  his  recollections  overcame  him,  and 
he  added,  with  a  grin :  "  But  he's  a  fearful  look- 
ing specimen,  all  right,  though." 

"  About  my  brother,"  she  went  on,  turning  the 
letter  thoughtfully  in  her  fingers;  "when  can  he 
get  out,  do  they  think?  " 

"  Any  time  next  week." 

"  I'll  write  him,"  she  said.  "  I'll  write  him  and 
tell  him  that  everything  will  be  arranged  for — for 
— for  them  both." 

Clover  sprang  to  his  feet. 

"  Oh,  thank  you,"  he  exclaimed.  "  That's 
most  awfully  good  in  you !  " 

"  Not  at  all,"  she  answered.  "  I'm  very  glad 
to  be  able  to  welcome  them.  You  must  impress 
that  upon  them — particularly — particularly  on  my 
brother." 

Clover  smiled. 

"  I  will,"  he  said,  rising  to  go. 

"  I'd  ask  you  to  stay  longer,"  she  said,  holding 


98     REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

out  her  hand,  "  but  I'm  due  at  a  chanty  entertain- 
ment to-night,  and  I  have  to  go  very  early." 

"  I  know,"  he  said;  "  I've  come  up  on  purpose 
to  go  to  it." 

"  Then  I  shall  see  you  there  ?  "  she  asked  him. 

"  It  will  be  what  I  shall  be  looking  forward  to 
most  of  all,"  he  said. 

"  It's  been  a  great  pleasure  to  meet  you,"  she 
said,  holding  out  her  hand,  "  you're — well,  you're 
'  unlike,'  as  they  say  in  literary  criticisms." 

"Thank  you,"  he  replied;  "but  may  I  ask  if 
you  intend  that  as  a  compliment?  " 

"  Dear  me,"  she  laughed,  "  let  me  think  how 
I  did  intend  it.— Yes,  it  was  meant  for  a  compli- 
ment." 

"  Thank  you,"  he  said,  shaking  her  hand 
warmly,  "  it's  so  nice  to  know,  you  know.  Good- 
by." 

"  Good-by." 

Then  he  went  away. 


Chapter  Eleven 

THE  DOVE  OF  PEACE 

THE  first  result  of    Mrs.    Rosscott's    invi- 
tation was  that  Jack   refused.     He   said 
that  he  had  a  sister  of  his  own — two,  if 
it  came  to  that — and  so  he  could  easily  manage  for 
himself.     He  .was  very  decided  about  it,  and  some- 
what lofty  and  bitter — a  stand  which  no  one  un- 
derstood his  taking. 

His  flat  refusal  was  communicated  to  his  would- 
be  hostess  and  it  goes  without  saying  that  she  was 
as  unable  to  understand  as  all  the  rest.  It  keyed 
well  enough  with  his  lately  shown  indifference,  but 
the  indifference  keyed  not  at  all  with  all  that  had 
gone  before  and  still  less  with  her  very  correct 
comprehension  of  Jack  himself.  She  was  quite 
positive  as  to  the  sincerity  of  those  protestations 
which  he  had  made  so  haltingly — so  boyishly — 
and  in  such  absolutely  truthful  accents.  Why  he 
had  turned  over  a  new — and  bad — leaf  so  suddenly 
she  did  not  at  all  know,  but  her  woman's  wit — 
backed  up  by  the  many  good  instincts  which  good 

99 


100    REJUVENATION   OF  AUNT   MARY 

women  always  get  from  Heaven  knows  just  where 
— made  her  feel  firmer  than  ever  as  to  her  hospit- 
able intentions.  Jack  had  told  her  many  times 
that  she  was  his  good  angel,  and  it  did  not  seem  to 
her  that  now,  when  he  was  so  deeply  involved  in 
so  much  trouble,  was  the  hour  for  a  man's  good 
angel  to  quietly  turn  away.  Suppose  he  was 
haughty  1 — she  knew  men  well  enough  to  know  that 
in  his  case  haughtiness  and  shame  would  be  two 
Dromios  that  even  he  himself  would  be  unable  to 
tell  apart.  Suppose  he  did  rebel  against  her  kind- 
ness ! — she  knew  women  well  enough  to  know  that 
under  some  circumstances  they  can  put  down  re- 
bellion single-handed — if  they  can  only  be  left  in 
the  room  alone  with  it  for  a  few  minutes.  As  re- 
garded Jack,  she  knew  that  there  was  something 
to  explain;  and  as  to  herself  she  was  delightfully 
positive  as  to  her  own  irresistibleness.  Given  two 
such  statements  and  the  conclusion  is  easy.  Mrs. 
Rosscott  wrote  to  Mitchell  and  here  is  what  she 
wrote : 

MY  DEAR  MR.  MITCHELL: 

I  should  have  answered  your  letter  before  only 
that  in  the  excitement  of  corresponding  with  my 
brother  I  forgot  all  else.  But  my  manners  have 
returned  by  slow  degrees  and  in  hunting  through 
my  desk  for  a  bill  I  found  you  and  so  take  up  my 
pen. 


THE    DOVE   OF   PEACE  101 

I  am  quite  sure  that — in  spite  of  that  beautiful 
opening  play  of  mine — you  are  wondering  why  I 
am  really  writing  and  so  I  will  tell  you  at  once. 
When  Bob  comes  here  to  stay  with  me  I  want  Mr. 
Denham  to  come  too.  I  have  various  reasons  for 
wanting  him  to  come.  One  is  that  he  has  nowhere 
else  to  go  where  he  will  have  half  as  good  a  time 
as  he  will  here  and  another  is  that  if  he  goes  any- 
where else  I  won't  have  half  as  good  a  time  as  if 
he  comes  here.  Pray  excuse  my  brutal  candor,  but 
I  am  only  a  woman;  brutal  candor  and  womanly 
weakness  always  have  gone  about  encouraging  one 
another,  you  know.  I  cannot  see  any  good  reason 
for  Mr.  Denham's  not  coming  except  that  he  de- 
clines my  invitation.  It  is  very  silly  in  him,  and 
I  regard  it  as  no  reason  at  all.  I  am  quite  unused 
to  being  declined  and  do  not  intend  to  acquire  the 
habit  until  I  am  a  good  deal  older  than  I  was  my 
last  birthday.  Still,  I  can  understand  that  he  is  too 
big  to  force  against  his  will,  so  I  think  the  kindest 
way  to  break  the  back  of  the  opposition  will  be  for 
me  to  do  it  personally.  As  an  over-ruler  I  nearly 
always  succeed.  All  I  require  is  an  oppor- 
tunity. 

Please  lay  the  two  halves  of  your  brain  evenly 
together  and  devise  a  train  and  an  interview  for 
me.  Of  course  you  will  meet  me  at  the  train  and 
leave  me  at  the  interview.  These  are  the  funda- 
mental rules  of  my  game.  I  know  that  you  are 
clever  and  before  we  have  left  the  station  you  will 
know  that  I  am.  As  arch-conspirators  we  shall 
surely  win  out  together,  won't  we  ? 

Yours  very  truly, 

BERTHA  ROSSCOTT. 


102    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

This  missive  posted,  Jack's  good  angel  made  her- 
self patient  until  the  afternoon  of  the  next  day 
when  she  might  and  did  expect  an  answer. 

She  was  not  disappointed.  The  letter  came  and 
it  was  pleasantly  bulky  and  appeared  ample  enough 
to  have  contained  an  indexed  gun  powder  plot. 
She  was  so  sure  that  Mitchell  had  been  fully  equal 
to  the  occasion  that  she  tore  the  envelope  open  with 
a  smile — and  read : 

MY  DEAR  MRS.  ROSSCOTT: 

To  think  of  my  having  some  of  your  handwrit- 
ing for  my  own ! — I  was  nearly  petrified  with  joy. 

You  see  I  know  your  writing  from  having  read 
Burnett  all  those  "  Burn  this  at  once  "  epistles. 
And  I  know  it  still  better  from  having  to  catalogue 
them  for  his  ready  reference.  You  know  how 
impatient  he  is.  (But  I  have  run  into  an  open 
switch  and  must  digress  backwards. ) 

I  shall  preserve  your  letter  till  I  die.  In  war 
I  shall  wear  it  carefully  spread  all  over  wherever 
I  may  be  killed,  and  in  peace  I  intend  to  keep  my 
place  in  my  Bible  with  it.  Could  words  say  more ! 
(Being  backed  up  again,  I  will  now  begin.) 

I  was  not  at  all  surprised  at  your  writing  me. 
If  you  had  known  me  it  would  have  been  different. 
But  where  ignorance  is  bliss  any  woman  but  your- 
self is  always  liable  to  pitch  in  with  a  pen,  and  you 
see  you  are  not  yourself  but  only  "  any  woman  " 
to  me  as  yet.  Besides,  women  have  written  to  me 
before  you.  My  mother  does  so  regularly.  She 
encloses  a  postal  card  and  all  I  have  to  do  is  to  mail 


THE    DOVE   OF   PEACE  103 

it  and  there  she  is  answered.  It's  a  great  scheme 
which  I  proudly  invented  when  I  first  went  away 
to  school  and  I  recommend  it  to  you  if  you — if  you 
ever  have  a  mother. 

How  my  ink  does  run  away  with  me !  Let  me 
refer  to  your  esteemed  favor  again!  Ah!  we 
have  worked  down  to  the  bed-rock,  or — in  Hugh 
Miller's  colloquial  phrasing — to  the  "  old  red  sand- 
stone," of  the  fact  that  you  want  Jack.  You  state 
the  fact  with  what  you  designate  as  brutal  can- 
dor— and  I  reply  with  candied  brutality,  that  I 
have  thought  that  all  along.  If  you  are  averse 
to  my  view  of  the  matter,  you  must  look  out  of  the 
window  the  whole  time  that  I  continue,  for  once 
entered  I  always  fight  to  a  finish  and  I  cannot  retire 
to  my  corner  on  this  auspicious  occasion  without 
announcing  through  a  trumpet  that  even  if  Jack  is 
a  most  idiotic  fellow  I  never  have  caught  the 
microbe  from  him,  and,  as  a  sequence,  have  always 
seen  clear  through  and  out  of  the  other  side  of  the 
whole  situation.  Of  course  I  should  not  say  this 
to  any  woman  but  you  because  it  would  not  have 
any  meaning  to  her,  but,  between  you  and  me  all 
things  are  printed  in  plain  black  and  white  and, 
therefore,  I  respectfully  submit  a  program  consist- 
ing of  the  two  o'clock  train  Tuesday  and  myself, 
to  be  recognized  by  a  beaming  look  of  burning 
joy,  upon  the  platform.  Beyond  that  you  may 
confide  yourself  to  waxing  waxy  in  my  hands. 
They  are  not  bad  hands  to  be  in  as  your  brother 
and  whatever-you-call-Jack  can  testify.  I  will  lay 
my  lines  in  the  dark  to  the  end  that  you  may  bloom 
in  the  sun. 

Trust  me.  You  need  do  no  more — except  buy 
your  ticket. 


104    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT  MARY 

The  two  o'clock  on  Tuesday.  You  can  easily 
remember  it  by  the  T's — if  you  don't  get  mixed 
with  three  o'clock  on  Thursday.  Try  remember- 
ing it  by  the  2's.  A  safe  way  would  be  to  put  it 
down. 

Yours  to  obey, 

HERBERT  KENDRICK  MITCHELL. 

P.  S.  Please  recollect  that  I  am  only  handsome 
according  to  the  good  old  proverb,  and  do  not  mis- 
take me  for  an  enterprising  hackman. 

Mrs.  Rosscott  clapped  her  hands  with  delight 
when  she  finished  the  letter.  She  was  overjoyed  at 
the  success  of  her  "  opening  play,"  and  she  wrote 
her  new  correspondent  two  lines  accepting  his 
invitation,  and  went  down  on  the  appointed  train 
on  the  appointed  day.  He  met  her  at  the  depot 
and  they  divined  one  another  at  the  first  glance. 
It  was  impossible  not  to  know  so  pretty  a  woman— 
or  so  homely  a  man.  For  the  ancestors  of  Mitchell 
had  worn  kilts  and  red  hair  in  centuries  gone  by, 
and  although  he  proved  the  truth  of  the  red-hair 
proposition,  no  one  would  ever  believe  that  any- 
thing of  his  build  could  ever  have  been  induced  to 
have  put  itself  into  kilts — knowingly.  Further- 
more, his  voice  had  a  crick  in  it,  and  went  by  jerks, 
and  his  eyebrows  sympathized  with  his  voice,  and 
the  eyes  below  them  were  little  and  gray  and  twink- 
ling, and  altogether  he  was  the  sort  of  man  who 


THE    DOVE   OF   PEACE  105 

is  termed — according  to  a  certain  style  of  phras- 
ing— "  above  suspicion."  But  she  liked  him,  oh! 
immensely,  and  he  liked  her.  And  when  they  were 
riding  up  in  the  carriage  together  she  felt  how 
thoroughly  trustworthy  his  gray  eyes  and  good 
smile  declared  him  to  be,  and  had  no  hesitation  in 
telling  him  what  she  wanted  to  do,  and  in  asking 
him  what  she  wanted  to  know. 

Mitchell  certainly  had  a  talent  for  plotting,  for 
when  they  reached  the  house  where  the  culprits 
were  temporarily  domiciled,  Burnett  had  gone  out 
to  give  his  mended  ribs  some  exercise,  and  Jack 
was  reading  alone  in  the  room  where  they  shared 
one  another's  liniments  with  friendly  generosity. 

The  arch-conspirator  went  upstairs,  came  down> 
and  then,  seeking  the  lady  whom  he  had  left  in  the 
parlor,  said  to  her: 

"  Denham's  up  there  ana  you  can  go  up  and  say 
whatever  you  have  to  say.  You  know  '  In  union 
there  is  strength.'  Well  you've  got  him  alone  now, 
and  he'll  prove  weakly  as  a  consequence  or  I  miss 
my  guess." 

Then  he  walked  straight  over  by  the  window 
and  picked  up  a  magazine  as  if  it  was  all  settled, 
and  she  only  hesitated  fdr  half  a  second  before  she 
turned  and  went  upstairs. 

There  was  a  door  half  open  in  the  hall  above, 
and  she  knew  that  that  must  be  the  door.  She 


106    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

tapped  at  it  lightly,  and  a  man's  voice  (a  voice  that 
she  knew  well) ,  called  out  gruffly: 

"Come  in!" 

She  pushed  the  door  open  at  that  and  entered, 
and  saw  Jack,  and  he  saw  her.  He  turned  very 
pale  at  the  sight,  and  then  the  color  flooded  his 
face,  and  he  rose  from  his  chair  abruptly,  and  put 
his  hand  up  to  the  strips  that  held  the  bandage  on 
his  head. 

"  Burnett  isn't  here,"  he  said,  quickly.  "  He 
went  out  just  a  few  minutes  ago." 

His  tone  was  hard,  and  yet  at  the  same  time  it 
shook  slightly. 

She  approached  him,  holding  out  her  hand. 

"  I'm  glad  of  that,"  she  said,  "  because  it  was 
to  see  you  that  I  came." 

To  her  great  surprise  something  mutinous  and 
scornful  flashed  in  his  eyes  as  he  rolled  a  chair  for- 
ward for  her. 

"  You  honor  me,"  he  said,  and  his  tone  and 
manner  both  hardened  yet  more.  His  general 
appearance  was  that  of  a  man  ten  years  older; 
he  had  changed  terribly  in  the  weeks  since  she  had 
last  seen  him.  She  took  the  chair  and  sat  down, 
still  looking  at  him.  He  sat  down  too,  and  his 
eyes  went  restlessly  around  the  room  as  if  they 
sought  a  hold  that  should  withhold  them  from  her 
searching  gaze.  There  was  a  short  pause. 


THE   DOVE   OF   PEACE  107 

"  Don't  speak  like  that,"  she  said  at  last.  "  It 
isn't  your  way,  and  I  know  you  too  well — we  know 
one  another  too  well — to  be  anything  but  sincere. 
You  owe  me  something,  too,  and  if  I  forbear  you 
should  understand  why." 

"I  owe  you  something,  do  I?"  he  asked. 
"What  do  I  owe  you?" 

Mrs.  Rosscott  caught  her  under  lip  in  her  teeth. 

"  You  gave  me  a  promise,  Mr.  Denham,"  she 
said,  quite  low,  but  most  distinctly — "  a  promise 
which  you  broke." 

Jack  flushed;  his  eyelids  drooped  for  a  minute. 

"  I  didn't  break  it,"  he  said.     "  I  gave  it  up." 

"  Is  there  any  difference?  " 

"  A  great  difference." 

He  shrugged  his  shoulders. 

"Do  you  want  to  have  the  truth?"  he  said. 
"  If  you  really  do,  I'll  tell  you.  But  I  don't  ask 
to  tell  you,  recollect,  and  if  I  were  you  I'd  drop  the 
whole — I  certainly  would. — If  I  were  you." 

She  looked  at  him  in  astonishment. 

"  I  don't  understand,"  she  said.  "  Tell  me  what 
you  mean." 

He  raised  his  hand  to  his  bandaged  head  again. 

"  I  think,"  he  said,  fighting  hard  to  speak  with 
utter  indifference,  "  I  think  that  it  would  have  been 
better  if  you  had  told  me  about  Holloway." 

At  that  her  big  eyes  opened  widely. 


108    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

"What  should  I  tell  you  about  Mr.  Hollo- 
way?  "  she  asked.  "  What  could  I  tell  you  about 
him?" 

u  It  isn't  any  use  speaking  like  that,"  he  said; 
and  with  the  words  he  suddenly  leaped  from  his 
chair  and  began  to  plunge  back  and  forth  across  the 
small  room.  "  You  see  I'm  not  a  boy  any  more. 
I've  come  to  my  senses.  I  know  now!  I  under- 
stand now!  It's  all  plain  to  me  now.  Now  and 
always.  I've  been  fooled  once  but  only  once  and 
by  All  that  Is,  I  never  will  be  fooled  again. 
Your're  pretty  and  awfully  fascinating,  and  it's 
always  fun  for  the  woman — especially  if  she  knows 
all  her  bets  are  safely  hedged.  And  I  was  so  com- 
pletely done  up  that  I  was  even  more  sport  than  the 

common  run,  I  suppose;  but "  she  was  staring 

at  him  in  unfeigned  amazement,  and  he  was  lashing 
himself  to  fury  with  the  feelings  that  underlaid  his 
words — "  but  even  if  you  made  it  all  right  with 
yourself  by  calling  your  share  by  the  name  of  '  hav- 
ing a  good  influence  '  over  me  ( I  know  that's  how 
married  women  always  pat  themselves  on  the  back 
while  they're  sending  us  to  the  devil),  even  then, 
I  think  that  it  would  have  been  better  to  have  been 
fair  and  square  with  me.  It  would  have  been  better 
all  round.  I'd  have  been  left  with  some  belief  in — 
in  people.  As  it  is,  when  I  saw  that  you'd  only 
been  laughing  at  me,  I — well,  I  went  pretty  far." 


THE   DOVE   OF   PEACE  109 

He  stopped  short,  and  transfixed  her  paleness 
with  his  big,  dark  eyes. 

"  Why  weren't  you  honest?  "  he  asked  angrily. 
And  then  he  said  again,  more  bitterly,  more  scorn- 
fully, than  before:  "Why  wasn't  I  told  about 
Holloway?" 

She  clasped  her  hands  tightly  together. 

"  What  has  been  told  you  about  Mr.  Holloway 
and  myself?  "  she  asked. 

"  Nothing." 
'  Then  why  do  you  speak  as  you  do?  " 

At  that  he  thrust  his  hands  into  his  pockets  and 
again  began  to  fling  himself  back  and  forth  across 
the  room. 

"  Perhaps  you'll  think  I'm  a  sneak,"  he  said, 
"  but  I  wasn't  a  sneak.  I  went  in  to  see  you  that 
Saturday  as  usual,  and  when  I  went  upstairs — you 
were  with  him  in  the  library.  I  heard  three  words. 
God !  they  were  enough !  I  didn't  know  that  any- 
thing could  knock  the  bottom  out  of  life  so  quickly. 
My  sun  and  stars  all  fell  at  once — I  reckon  my 
Heaven  went  too.  At  all  events  I  went  out  of  your 
house  and  down  town  and  I  drank  and  drank — 
and  all  to  the  truth  and  honor  of  women." 

He  halted  with  his  back  to  her,  and  there  was 
silence  in  the  room  for  many  minutes. 

When  he  faced  around  after  a  little,  she  was 
weeping  bitterly,  having  turned  in  her  seat  so  that 


110    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

her  face  might  be  buried  in  the  chair  back.  Her 
whole  body  was  shaking  with  suppressed  sobs. 
He  stood  still  and  stared  down  upon  her  and  finally 
she  lifted  up  her  face  and  said  with  trembling  lips : 

"  And  all  the  trouble  came  from  that.  Oh, 
what  shall  I  do?  What  shall  I  say?  " 

"  I  don't  know  what  you  can  do,  or  what  you 
can  say,"  he  said,  remaining  still  and  watching  her 
sincere  distress.  "  I'd  feel  pretty  blamed  mean  if 
I  were  you,  though.  Understand,  I  don't  question 
your  good  taste  in  choosing  Holloway,  nor  your 
right  to  love  him,  nor  his  right  to  be  there;  but 
I  fail  to  understand  why  you  were  to  me  just  as  you 
were,  and  I  think  it  was  unfair — out-and-out 
mean!  " 

"  Mr.  Denham,"  she  said  almost  painfully, 
"  you've  made  a  dreadful  mistake."  Then  she 
stopped  and  moistened  her  lips.  "  I  don't  know 
just  what  words  you  overheard,  but  the  dramatic 
instructor  was  there  that  afternoon  drilling  Mr. 
Holloway  and  myself  for  the  parts  which  we  took 
in  the  charity  play  that  week;  after  he  went  out  we 
went  over  one  of  the  scenes  alone.  Perhaps  you 
heard  part  of  that."  She  stopped  and  almost 
choked.  "  Mr.  Holloway  has  never  really  made 
any  love  to  me — perhaps  he  never  wanted  to — per- 
haps I've  never  wanted  him  to." 

Jack  stared.    His  misconception  was  so  strongly 


THE    DOVE   OF   PEACE  111 

intrenched  in  the  forefront  of  his  brain  that  he 
could  not  possibly  dislodge  it  at  once. 

Mrs.  Rosscott  continued  to  dry  the  tears  that 
continued  to  rise;  she  seemed  terribly  affected  at 
finding  herself  to  have  been  the  cause  (no  matter 
how  innocently)  of  this  latest  tale  of  wrack  and 
ruin. 

"  Do  you  mean  to  say,"  the  young  man  said,  at 
last,  "  that  there  was  no  truth  in  what  I  heard? 
Don't  you  expect  to  marry  Holloway?  " 

"  I  never  expect  to  marry  anyone,  but  certainly 
not  him,"  she  replied,  trying  to  regain  her  com- 
posure. 

"Honest?" 

"  Assuredly." 

It  was  as  if  an  unseen  orchestra  had  suddenly 
burst  forth  just  near  enough  and  just  far  enough 
away.  He  came  to  the  side  of  her  chair  and  laid 
his  hand  upon  its  back. 

"  Then  what  have  you  been  thinking  of  me 
lately?  "  he  asked. 

"  Very  sad  thoughts,"  she  confessed — hiding 
her  face  again. 

"Did  you  care?" 

"  Yes,  I  cared." 

He  stood  beside  her  for  a  long  time  without 
speaking  or  moving.  Then  he  suddenly  pulled  a 
chair  forward,  and  sat  down  close  in  front  of  her. 


REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Don't  cry,"  he  said,  almost  daring  to  be 
tender.  "  There's  nothing  to  cry  about  now,  you 
know." 

"  I  think  there's  plenty  for  me  to  cry  about,"  she 
said,  looking  up  through  her  long  wet  lashes.  "  It 
is  so  terrible  for  me  to  be  the  one  that  is  to  blame. 
Papa  swears  he'll  never  forgive  Bob,  and  your 
aunt " 

"  Lord  love  you!  "  he  exclaimed;  "  don't  worry 
over  me  or  my  aunt.  I  don't.  I  don't  mind  any- 
thing, with  Holloway  staked  in  the  ditch.  I  can 
get  along  well  enough  now." 

He  smiled — actually  smiled — as  he  spoke. 

"  Oh,  you  mustn't  speak  so,"  she  said,  blushing; 
"  indeed,  you  must  not."  And  smiled,  too,  in  spite 
of  herself. 

"Who's  going  to  stop  me?"  he  said.  "You 
know  that  you  can't;  I'm  miles  the  biggest." 

She  looked  at  him  and  tried  to  frown,  but  only 
blushed  again  instead.  He  put  out  his  hand  and 
took  hers  into  its  clasp. 

"  I'm  everlasting  glad  to  shake  college,"  he 
declared  gayly;  "  it  never  was  my  favorite  alley. 
I've  made  up  my  mind  to  go  to  work  just  as  soon 
as  I  get  these  pastry  strips  off  my  head." 

"Where?" 

"  I  don't  know.    Anywhere.     I  don't  care." 

"  But  you'll  come  to  my  house  when  Bob  comes 


THE    DOVE   OF   PEACE  113 

next  week,  won't  you?"  she  asked  suddenly. 
"  I  can  see  now  why  you  wouldn't  before,  but — 
but  it's  different  now.  Isn't  it?  " 

"  Is  it?  "  he  said,  asking  the  question  chiefly  of 
her  pretty  eyes.  "  Is  it  honestly  different  now?  " 

"  I  think  it  is,"  she  answered. 

A  door  banged  below. 

"  That's  Burr !  "  he  exclaimed,  remembering 
suddenly  the  proximity  of  their  chairs,  and  making 
haste  to  place  himself  farther  away. 

Burnett's  step  was  heard  on  the  stair. 

"  You  never  said  anything  to  him,  did  you?  " 
she  questioned  quickly. 

"  Certainly  not." 

The  next  instant  Burnett  was  in  the  room,  and 
his  sister  was  in  his  arms.  (Astonishing  how  coolly 
he  accepted  the  fact,  too.) 

"  Mr.  Denham  is  coming  to  me  with  you, 
Bob,"  she  said  when  he  released  her.  "  I've  per- 
suaded him." 

"  How  did  you  do  it?  "  she  was  asked. 

"  By  undertaking  to  reconcile  him  with  his  aunt, 
dear,"  she  replied,  blandly.  "  It's  a  contract  that 
we've  drawn  up  between  us.  You  know  that  I  was 
always  rather  good  in  the  part  of  the  peacemaker." 

As  she  spoke,  her  eyes  fell  warningly  on  the 
manifest  astonishment  of  Aunt  Mary's  nephew. 

"  You   don't  know   what  you're   undertaking, 


114    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

Betty,"  said  her  brother.  "  You  never  had  a 
chance  to  take  Aunt  Mary  for  better,  for  worse — 
I  have." 

"  I'm  not  alarmed,"  said  she,  "  I'm  very 
courageous.  I'm  sure  I'll  succeed." 

"  Can  the  mender  of  ways — other  people's 
ways — come  in?  "  asked  a  voice  at  the  door. 

It  was  Mitchell's  voice,  and  he  came  in  without 
waiting  for  an  invitation. 

"  Is  it  time  that  I  went?  "  Mrs.  Rosscott  asked 
him,  anxiously. 

11  Half  an  hour  yet." 

"Oh,  I  say  Jack,"  cried  Burnett,  "let's  boil 
some  water  in  the  witch-hazel  pan,  and  make  a 
rarebit  in  the  poultice  pan,  and  have  some  tea 
here." 

"  Sure,"  said  Jack,  suddenly  become  his  blithe 
and  buoyant  self  again.  "  You  just  take  off  your 
hat  and  look  the  other  way,  Mrs.  Rosscott,  and 
we'll  have  you  a  lunch  in  a  jiffy." 


Chapter  Twelve 

A  TRAP   FOR  AUNT  MARY 

IN  Aunt  Mary's  part  of  the  country  the  skies 
had  been  crying  themselves  sick  for  the  last  six 
weeks.     The  cranberry  bog  was  a  goner  for- 
ever, it  was  feared,  and  a  little  house,  very  handy 
for  sorting  berries  in,   had  had  its   foundations 
undermined,  and  disappeared  beneath  the  face  of 
the  waters  also. 

Under  such  propitious  circumstances,  Aunt 
Mary  sat  by  her  own  particular  window  and  looked 
sternly  and  severely  out  across  the  garden  and 
down  the  road.  Lucinda  sat  by  the  other  window 
sewing.  Lucinda  hadn't  changed  materially,  but 
her  general  appearance  struck  her  mistress  as  more 
irritating  than  ever.  Everything  and  everybody 
seemed  to  have  become  more  and  more  irritating 
ever  since  Jack  had  been  disinherited.  Of  course, 
it  was  right  that  he  should  have  been  disinherited, 
but  Aunt  Mary  hadn't  thought  much  beforehand 
as  to  what  would  happen  afterward,  and  it  was  too 
aggravating  to  have  him  turn  out  so  well  just  when 
she  had  lost  all  patience  with  him  and  so  cast  him 


116    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

off  forever,  and  for  him  to  develop  such  a  beautiful 
character,  all  of  a  sudden  too — just  as  if  educa- 
tion and  good  advice  had  been  his  undoing  and 
seclusion  and  illness  were  the  guardian  angels 
arrived  just  in  time  to  save  him  from  the  evil 
effects  thereof. 

It  hadn't  occurred  to  Aunt  Mary  that  people 
keep  on  living  just  the  same  even  after  they  have 
been  cut  out  of  a  will.  And  she  never  had  counted 
on  Jack's  taking  his  bitter  medicine  in  the  spirit  he 
was  manifesting.  She  had  not  calculated  any 
of  the  possible  effects  of  her  hasty  action  very 
maturely,  but  she  certainly  had  not  anticipated  a 
lamblike  submission  to  even  the  harshest  of  her 
edicts,  nor  had  she  expected  Jack  to  be  one  who 
would  strictly  observe  the  Bible  regulations  and 
so  return  good  for  evil — in  other  words,  write  her 
now  when  he  had  never  written  her  in  the  bygone 
years  (unless  under  sharpest  financial  stress  of 
circumstances). 

Yet  such  was  the  case.  Jack  had  become  a 
"  ready  letter-writer  "  ever  since  his  removal  to  the 
city,  whither  some  kind  friends  had  invited  him 
directly  he  could  leave  his  sick-room.  Aunt  Mary 
did  not  know  who  the  friends  were  and  had  hesi- 
tated somewhat  as  to  opening  the  first  letter.  But 
it  had  borne  no  sting — being  instead  most  sweetly 
pathetic,  and  since  then,  others  had  followed  with 


A  TRAP  FOR  AUNT  MARY    117 

touching  frequency.  Their  polished  periods  fell 
upon  the  old  lady's  stony  hardness  of  heart  with 
the  persistent  frequency  of  the  proverbial  drop  of 
water.  After  the  second  she  had  ceased  to  regard 
the  instructions  given  Lucinda  as  to  mentioning  her 
nephew's  name,  and  after  the  third  he  became 
again  her  favorite  topic  of  conversation. 

It  seemed  that  the  poor  boy  had  had  the  mis- 
fortune to  contract  measles,  and  in  his  weakened 
state  the  disease  had  nearly  proved  fatal.  You  can 
perhaps  divine  the  effect  of  this  statement  on  the 
grand-aunt,  and  the  further  effect  of  the  words, 
"  But  never  mind,  Aunt  Mary,"  with  which  he  con- 
cluded the  brief  narration. 

Aunt  Mary  had  tried  to  snort  and  had  sniffed 
instead;  she  had  turned  back  to  the  first  page,  read, 
"  All  my  head  has  been  shaved,  but  I  don't  care 
about  having  any  more  fun,  anyhow,"  and  had 
let  the  letter  fall  in  her  lap.  Every  time  that  she 
had  thought  since  of  "  our  boy,"  her  anger  had 
fallen  hotter  upon  whoever  was  handiest.  Lucinda 
(who  was  used  to  it)  lived  under  a  figurative  rain 
of  cinders,  and  thrived  salamander-like  in  their 
midst;  but  Arethusa — who  had  come  up  for  a 
week — found  herself  totally  unable  to  stand  the 
endless  lava  and  boiling  ashes,  and  fled  back  to  the 
bosom  of  Mr.  Arethusa  the  third  morning  after 
her  arrival. 


118    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  I've  got  to  go,  I  find,"  she  had  yelled  the  night 
before  her  departure. 

"  I  certainly  wish  you  would,"  replied  her  aunt. 
"  I'm  a  great  believer  in  married  women  paying 
attention  at  home  before  they  begin  to  pry  into 
their  neighbors'  affairs.  It's  a  good  idea.  Most 
generally — most  always." 

This  was  bitterly  unkind,  since  Arethusa  was  in 
the  habit  of  taking  the  long  journey  purely  out  of  a 
sense  of  duty  and  to  keep  Lucinda  up  to  the  mark ; 
but  grateful  appreciation  is  rarely  ever  a  salient 
point  in  the  character  of  an  autocrat. 

"  I'm  glad  she's  gone,"  Aunt  Mary  told 
Lucinda,  when  they  were  left  together  once  more. 
"  She  puts  me  beyond  all  patience.  She  chatters 
gibberish  that  I  can't  make  out  a  word  of  for 
an  hour  at  a  time,  and  then,  all  of  a  sudden, 
she  screams,  '  Dinner's  ready,'  or  something 
equally  silly,  in  a  voice  like  a  carvin'  knife. 
It's  enough  to  drive  a  sane  person  stark,  raving 
mad.  It  is." 

Lucinda  acquiesced  with  a  nod.  Lucinda  herself 
was  glad  that  Arethusa  had  gone.  She  resented 
the  manner  in  which  the  latter  always  looked  over 
the  preserve  closet  and  counted  the  silver.  Noth- 
ing was  ever  missing,  because  Lucinda  was  as  hon- 
est as  a  day  twenty-five  hours  long,  but  the  more 
honest  those  of  Lucinda's  caliber  are,  the  more 


A  TRAP  FOR  AUNT  MARY    119 

mad  they  get  if  they  feel  that  they  are  being 
watched.  So  Lucinda  acquiesced  with  a  nod. 

The  mistress  and  maid  were  sitting  alone  to- 
gether, with  the  June  rain  falling  without,  and  it 
was  that  pleasantly  exciting  hour  which  comes  only 
in  the  country  and  is  known  as  "  about  mail-time." 

"  There's  Joshua  now,"  Aunt  Mary  exclaimed, 
presently,  "  I  see  him  turnin'  in  the  gate.  He'll  be 
at  the  door  before  you  get  there,  Lucinda, — he 
will.  There,  he's  twistin'  his  wheel  off.  He's 
tryin'  to  hold  Billy  an'  hold  the  letters  an'  whistle, 
all  at  once.  Why  don't  you  go  to  him,  Lucinda? 
Can't  you  hear  a  whistle  that  I  can  see?  Or,  if 
you  can't  hear  the  whistle,  can't  you  hear  me  ?  Do 
you  think  whoever  wrote  those  letters  would  be 
much  pleased  if  they  could  see  you  so  slow  about 
gettin'  them?  Do " 

Just  here  the  old  lady,  turning  toward  Lucinda, 
perceived  that  she  had  been  gone — Heaven  knew 
how  long.  She  felt  decidedly  vexed  at  finding  her- 
self to  be  in  the  wrong,  rubbed  her  nose  impa- 
tiently, and  waited  in  a  temper  to  match  the 
rubbing. 

"  My  Lord !  how  slow  she  is !  "  she  thought. 
'  Well,  if  I  don't  die  of  old  age  first,  I  presume 
I'll  get  my  letters  some  time.  Maybe." 

As  a  matter  of  fact,  the  door  had  blown  shut 
behind  Lucinda,  and  the  latter  personage  was  mak- 


120    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

ing  her  way,  with  well-hoisted  skirts,  around  the 
house  to  the  back  door.  She  didn't  pass  the  win- 
dow where  the  Argus-eyed  was  looking  forth, 
because  that  lady  had  strong  opinions  of  those  who 
let  doors  bang  behind  them  without  their  own 
volition. 

Five  minutes  later  the  maid  did  finally  appear 
with  one  letter. 

"  I  thought  you  was  waitin'  to  bring  to-mor- 
row's mail  at  the  same  time,"  said  Aunt  Mary, 
icily. 

Then  she  found  that  the  letter  was  from  Jack, 
and  Lucinda  was  completely  forgotten  in  the 
pleasure  of  opening  and  reading  it. 

DEAR  AUNT  MARY  : 

It  seems  so  strange  how  I'm  just  learning  the 
pleasure  of  writing  letters.  I  enjoy  it  more  every 
day.  When  I  see  a  pen  I  can  hardly  keep  from 
feeling  that  I  ought  to  write  you  directly.  I  think 
of  you,  then,  because  I'm  thinking  of  you  most 
always.  It  seems  as  if  I  never  appreciated  you 
before,  Aunt  Mary. 

I  want  to  tell  you  something  that  I  know  will 
make  you  happy.  I've  never  made  you  very  happy 
Aunt  Mary,  but  I'm  going  to  begin  now.  I've  got 
a  place  where  I  can  earn  my  own  living,  and  I'm 
going  to  work  just  as  soon  as  I  am  strong  enough. 
I'm  as  tickled  as  a  baby  over  it.  I'll  lay  you  any 
odds  I  get  to  be  a  richer  man  than  the  other  John 
Watkins.  I  reckon  money  was  bad  for  me,  Aunt 


A   TRAP   FOR   AUNT   MARY 

Mary,  and  I  can  see  that  you've  done  just  the  right 
thing  to  make  a  man  of  me.  That  isn't  surprising, 
because  you  always  did  do  just  the  right  thing, 
Aunt  Mary ;  it  was  I  that  always  did  just  the  wrong 
thing,  but  I'm  straightened  out  now  and  this  time 
it's  forever — you  just  wait  and  see. 

There's  one  thing  bothers  me  some,  and  that  is 
I  don't  get  strong  very  fast.  They  want  me  to 
take  a  tonic,  but  I  don't  think  a  tonic  would  help 
me  much.  I  feel  so  sort  of  blue  and  depressed,  and 
perhaps  that's  natural,  for  Bob's  away  most  of  the 
time  and  I'm  here  all  alone.  It's  a  big  house  and 
sort  of  lonely  and  sometimes  I  find  myself  imagin- 
ing how  it  would  seem  to  have  someone  from 
home  in  it  with  me,  and  I  find  myself  almost  cry- 
ing— I  do,  for  a  fact,  Aunt  Mary. 

Next  week,  Bob  is  going  to  be  away  more  than 
usual,  and  I'm  dreading  it  awfully;  but  never  mind, 
Aunt  Mary,  I  don't  want  to  make  you  blue,  because 
honestly  I  don't  think  I'm  going  into  a  decline, 
even  if  the  doctor  does.  And,  after  all,  if  I  did 
sort  of  dwindle  away  it  wouldn't  matter  much,  for 
I'm  not  worth  anything,  and  nd  one  knows  that  as 
well  as  myself — except  you,  Aunt  Mary. 

I  must  stop  because  it's  nine  o'clock  and  time  I 
was  in  bed.  I've  got  some  socks  to  wash  out  first, 
too;  you  see,  I'm  learning  how  to  economize  just 
as  fast  as  I  can.  It's  only  two  miles  to  my  work, 
and  I'm  going  to  walk  back  and  forth  always — 
that'll  be  between  fifty  cents  and  a  dollar  saved 
each  week.  I'm  figuring  on  how  to  live  on  my 
salary  and  never  have  a  debt,  and  you'll  be  proud 
of  me  yet,  Aunt  Mary — if  I  don't  die  first. 

Think  of  me  all  alone  here  next  week.  If  I 
wasn't  steadfast  as  a  rock  I  believe  I'd  do  some- 


REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

thing  foolish  just  to  get  out  of  myself.    But  never 
mind,  Aunt  Mary,  it's  all  right. 
Your  afft.  nephew, 

JOHN  WATKINS,  JR.,  DENHAM. 

When  Lucinda  returned  from  drying  her  feet, 
Aunt  Mary  had  her  handkerchief  in  one  hand  and 
spectacles  in  the  other. 

"  Saints  and  sinners !  "  cried  the  maid,  in  a 
voice  that  grated  with  sympathy.  "  He  ain't  writ 
to  say  he's  dead,  is  he?  " 

"  No,"  said  Aunt  Mary;  "  but  he  isn't  as  well 
as  he  makes  out.  There's  no  deceivin'  me, 
Lucinda !  " 

"  Dear!  dear!  "  cried  the  Trusty  and  True;  "  is 
that  so?  "What's  to  be  done?  Do  you  want 
Joshua  to  run  anywhere?  " 

Aunt  Mary  suddenly  regained  her  composure. 

"Run  anywhere?"  she  asked,  with  her  usual 
bitter  intonation.  "  If  you  ain't  the  greatest  fool 
I  ever  was  called  upon  to  bed  and  board,  Lucinda ! 
Will  you  kindly  explain  to  me  how  settin'  Joshua 
trottin'  is  goin'  to  do  any  mortal  good  to  my  poor 
boy  away  off  there  in  that  dreadful  city?  " 

"  He  could  telegraph  to  Miss  Arethusa," 
Lucinda  suggested.  The  suggestion  bespoke  the 
superior  moral  quality  of  Luanda's  make-up — 
her  own  feeling  toward  Arethusa  being  con- 
sidered. 


A  TRAP  FOR  AUNT  MARY    123 

"  I  don't  want  her,"  said  Aunt  Mary  with  a 
positiveness  that  was  final.  "  I  don't  want  her. 
My  heavens,  Lucinda,  ain't  we  just  had  enough 
of  her?  Anyhow,  if  you  ain't,  I  have.  I  don't 
want  her,  nor  no  livin'  soul  except  my  trunk;  an' 
I  want  that  just  as  quick  as  Joshua  can  haul  it  down 
out  of  the  attic." 

"  You  ain't  thinkin'  of  goin'  travelin' !  "  the 
maid  cried  in  consternation ;  "  you  can't  never  be 
thinkin'  of  that?  " 

"  No,"  said  her  mistress  with  fine  irony;  "  I 
want  the  trunk  to  make  a  pie  out  of,  probably." 

Lucinda  was  speechless. 

"  Lucinda,"  her  mistress  said,  after  a  few 
seconds  had  faded  away  unimproved,  "  seems  to 
me  I  mentioned  wantin'  Joshua  to  get  down  a 
trunk — seems  to  me  I  did." 

The  maid  turned  and  left  the  room.  She  felt 
more  or  less  dazed.  Nothing  so  startling  as  Aunt 
Mary's  wanting  a  trunk  had  happened  in  years. 
Disinheriting  Jack  was  not  in  it  by  comparison. 
She  went  slowly  away  to  find  Joshua  and  found 
him  in  the  farther  end  of  the  rear  woodhouse — 
John  Watkins,  like  several  of  his  ilk,  having 
marked  each  forward  step  in  the  world  by  a  back 
extension  of  his  house. 

Joshua  was  chopping  wood;  his  ax  was  high  in 
the  air.  He  also  was  calm  and  unsuspecting. 


REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  She's  goin'  to  the  city  all  alone!  "  Lucinda's 
voice  suddenly  proclaimed  behind  him. 

The  ax  fell. 

"  Who  says  so?  "  its  handler  demanded,  facing 
about  in  surprise. 

"  She  says  so." 

Joshua  picked  up  the  ax  and  poised  it  afresh. 
He  was  himself  again. 

"  She'll  go  then,"  he  said  calmly. 

Lucinda  marched  around  in  front  of  him,  and 
planted  herself  firmly  among  the  chips. 

"  Joshua  Whittlesey !  " 

"  We  can't  help  it,"  said  Joshua  stolidly. 
"  We're  here  to  mind  her.  If  she  wants  to  go  to 
New  York,  or  to  change  her  will,  all  we've  got 
to  do  is  to  be  simple  witnesses." 

"  She  don't  want  Miss  Arethusa  telegraphed," 
said  Lucinda. 

"  I  don't  blame  her,"  said  Joshua;  "  if  I  was 
her  and  if  I  was  goin'  to  New  York  I  wouldn't 
want  no  one  telegraphed." 

"  She  wants  her  trunk  out  of  the  attic." 

"  Then  she'll  get  her  trunk  out  of  the  attic. 
When  does  she  want  it  ?  " 

"  She  wants  it  now." 

"  Then  she'll  get  it  now,"  said  Joshua.  From 
the  general  trend  of  this  and  other  remarks  of 
Joshua  the  reader  will  readily  divine  why  he  had 


"  '  She 's  goin'  to  the  city  all  alone  ! '  Luanda's  voice  suddenly  proclaimed 
behind  him." 


A   TRAP   FOR   AUNT   MARY 

been  in  Aunt  Mary's  employ  for  thirty  years,  and 
had  always  been  characterized  by  her  as  "  a  most 
sensible  man,"  and  anyone  who  had  seen  the 
alacrity  with  which  the  trunk  was  brought  and  the 
respectful  attention  with  which  Aunt  Mary's  fur- 
ther commands  were  received  would  have  been 
forced  to  coincide  in  her  opinion. 

The  packing  of  the  trunk  was  a  task  which  fell 
to  Lucinda's  lot  and  was  performed  under  the 
eagle  eye  of  her  mistress.  Aunt  Mary's  ideas  of 
what  she  would  require  were  delightfully  unso- 
phisticated and  brought  up  short  on  the  farther- 
side  of  her  tooth  brush  and  her  rubbers.  Never- 
theless she  agreed  in  Lucinda's  suggestions  as  to 
more  extensive  supplies. 

Late  that  afternoon  Joshua  drove  into  town 
(amidst  a  wealth  of  mud  spatters)  and  dispatched 
the  answer  to  Jack's  letter.  Aunt  Mary  was  urged 
to  haste  by  several  considerations,  some  well 
defined,  and  others  not  so  much  so.  To  Lucinda 
she  imparted  her  terrible  anxiety  over  the  dear 
boy's  health,  but  not  even  to  herself  did  she  admit 
her  much  more  terrible  anxiety  lest  Arethusa  or 
Mary  should  suddenly  appear  and  insist  on  accom- 
panying her.  She  wanted  to  go,  but  she  wanted 
to  go  alone. 

Jack  telegraphed  a  response  that  night,  and  his 
aunt  left  by  the  Monday  morning  train.  She  had 


126    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

a  six  o'clock  breakfast,  and  drove  into  town  at  a 
quarter  of  nine  so  as  to  be  absolutely  certain  not 
to  miss  the  train.  Joshua  drove,  with  the  trunk 
perched  beside  him.  It  was  a  small  and  unassum- 
ing trunk,  but  Aunt  Mary  was  not  one  who 
believed  in  putting  on  airs  just  because  she  was 
rich.  Lucinda  sat  on  the  back  seat  with  her 
mistress. 

"  I'm  sure  I  hope  you'll  enjoy  yourself,"  she 
said. 

"  Of  course  he's  nothing  but  a  boy,"  Aunt  Mary 
replied, — "  an'  I've  told  you  a  hundred  times  that 
boys  will  be  boys  and  we  mustn't  expect  other- 
wise." 

They  arrived  on  time,  and  only  had  an  hour 
and  three-quarters  to  wait  in  the  station.  Toward 
the  last  Aunt  Mary  grew  very  nervous  for  fear 
something  had  happened  to  the  train;  but  it  came 
to  time  according  to  the  waiting-room  clock. 
Joshua  put  her  aboard,  and  she  soon  had  nothing 
left  to  worry  over  except  the  wonder  as  to  whether 
Jack  would  be  on  hand  to  meet  her  or  not. 

Joshua  drove  back  home,  let  Lucinda  out  at  the 
door,  and  put  the  horse  up  before  going  in  to  where 
she  sat  in  solitary  glory. 

"  I  wonder  what  he's  up  to?  "  she  said  with  a 
pleasant  sense  of  unlimited  freedom  as  to  the  sub- 
ject and  duration  of  the  conversation. 


A  TRAP  FOR  AUNT  MARY    127 

"  Suthin',  of  course,"  was  the  answer. 

"  Do  you  s'pose  he's  really  sick?  " 

"  No,  I  don't." 

"  Do  you  s'pose  she  thinks  he's  really  sick?  " 

"  Mebbe." 

"  Ain't  you  goin'  to  sit  down,  Joshua?  " 

"  I  don't  see  nothin'  to  make  me  sit  down  here 
for." 

"  What  do  you  think  of  her  going?  "  she  said, 
as  he  walked  toward  the  door. 

"  I  think  she'll  have  a  good  time." 

"At  her  age?" 

"  Havin'  a  good  time  ain't  a  matter  o'  age,"  said 
Joshua.  "  It's  a  matter  o'  bein'  willin'  to  have  a 
good  time." 

Lucinda  screwed  her  face  up  mightily. 

"  If  I  was  sure  she'd  be  gone  for  a  week,"  she 
said,  "  I'd  go  a-visitin'  myself." 

"  She'll  be  gone  a  week,"  said  Joshua;  and  the 
manner  and  matter  of  his  speech  were  both  those 
of  a  prophet. 

Then  he  went  out  and  the  door  slammed  to 
behind  him. 


Chapter  Thirteen 

AUNT  MARY  ENTRAPPED 

ANT  MARY'S  arrival  in  the  city  just  coin- 
cided with  the  arrival  of  that  day's  five 
o'clock.  Five  o'clock  in  early  June  is  very 
bright  daylight,  therefore  she  was  rather  bewil- 
dered when  the  train  pulled  up  in  the  darkness  and 
electricity  of  the  station's  confusion.  The  change 
from  sunlight  to  smoke  blinded  her  somewhat  and 
the  view  from  the  car  window  did  not  restore  her 
equanimity.  When  the  porter,  to  whom  she  had 
been  discreetly  recommended  by  Joshua,  came  for 
her  bags,  she  felt  woefully  distressed  and  not  at 
all  like  her  usual  self. 

"  Oh,  do  I  have  to  get  out?  "  she  said.  "  I  ain't 
been  in  this  place  for  twenty-five  years,  and  I  was 
to  be  met." 

The  porter's  grin  hovered  comfortingly  over 
her  head. 

"  You  can  stay  here  jus'  's  long  as  you  like, 
ma'am,"  he  yelled,  in  the  voice  of  a  train  dis- 
patcher. "  I'll  send  your  friends  in  when  they 
inquiahs." 

Aunt  Mary  eyed  him  gratefully,  and  gave  him 
128 


AUNT   MARY   ENTRAPPED  129 

the  nickel  which  she  had  been  carefully  holding  in 
her  hand  for  the  last  hour. 

Then  she  looked  up,  and  saw  Jack! 

A  perfectly  splendid  Jack,  in  resplendent  attire, 
handsome,  beaming,  with  a  big  bouquet  of  violets 
in  his  hand! 

"  For  you,  Aunt  Mary,"  he  said,  and  dropped 
them  into  her  lap,  and  hugged  her  fervently.  She 
clung  to  him  with  a  cling  that  forgot  the  imme- 
diate past,  disinheriting  and  all.  Oh!  she  was  so 
glad  to  see  him ! 

The  porter  approached  with  a  beneficent  look. 

"  Has  he  taken  good  care  of  you,  Aunt  Mary?  " 
Jack  asked,  as  the  man  gathered  up  the  things  and 
they  started  to  leave  the  car. 

"  Yes,  indeed,"  Aunt  Mary  declared. 

So  Jack  gave  the  porter  a  dollar. 

Then  they  left  the  train. 

"  I  was  so  worried,"  Aunt  Mary  said,  as  she 
went  along  the  platform  hanging  on  her  nephew's 
arm.  "  I  thought  you'd  met  with  an  accident." 

"  I  couldn't  get  on  until  the  rest  got  off,"  he 
said,  gazing  down  on  her  with  a  smile ;  "  but  I  was 
on  hand,  all  right.  My,  but  it's  good  to  think  that 
you're  here,  Aunt  Mary!  Maybe  you  think  that 
I  don't  appreciate  your  taking  all  this  trouble  for 
me,  but  I  do,  just  the  same." 

Aunt  Mary  smiled  all  over.     Everyone  who 


130    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

passed  them  was  smiling,  too,  and  that  added  to 
the  general  joy  of  the  atmosphere.  Aunt  Mary 
felt  proud  of  Jack,  and  rejoiced  as  to  herself.  Her 
content  with  life  in  general  was,  for  the  moment, 
limitless.  She  did  not  stop  to  dissect  the  sources 
of  her  delight.  She  was  not  in  a  critical  mood  just 
then. 

"  Why  don't  you  stick  those  flowers  in  your 
belt,  Aunt  Mary?  "  her  nephew  asked,  as  they 
penetrated  the  worst  of  the  human  jungle,  and  the 
preservation  of  the  violets  appeared  to  be  the  main 
question  of  the  day.  "  That's  what  the  girls  do." 

His  aunt  looked  vaguely  down  at  herself.  She 
had  no  belt  to  stick  her  violets  in.  She  wore  no 
belt.  She  wore  a  basque.  A  basque  is  a  beltless 
something  that  you  can't  remember,  but  that 
females  did,  once  upon  a  time,  cover  the  upper  half 
of  their  forms  with.  Basques  buttoned  down  the 
front  with  ten  to  thirty  buttons,  and  may  be  studied 
at  leisure  in  any  good  collection  of  daguerreo- 
types. Ladies  like  Aunt  Mary  are  apt  to  scorn 
such  futilities  as  waning  styles  after  they  pass 
beyond  a  certain  age,  and  for  that  reason  there 
was  no  place  for  Jack's  violets. 

"  Never  mind,"  he  said  cheerfully,  having 
followed  her  dubiousness  with  his  understanding. 
"  Just  hang  on  to  them  a  minute  longer,  and  we'll 
be  out  of  all  this." 


AUNT   MAR¥    ENTRAPPED  131 

His  words  came  true,  and  they  finally  did 
emerge  from  the  seething  mass  and  found  a  car- 
riage, the  door  of  which  happened  to  be  standing 
mysteriously  open.  Within,  upon  the  small  seat, 
some  omniscient  hands  had  already  deposited  Aunt 
Mary's  bags.  It  did  not  take  long  to  stow  Aunt 
Mary,  face  to  her  luggage,  and  she  was  barely 
established  there  before  her  trunk  came,  too;  and, 
although  the  coachman  looked  so  gorgeous,  he 
was  nevertheless  obliging  enough  to  allow  it  to 
couch  humbly  at  his  feet. 

Then  they  rolled  away. 

Jack  sat  sideways  and  looked  at  his  aunt,  hold- 
ing her  hand.  His  eyes  were  unfeignedly  happy, 
and  his  companion  matched  his  eyes.  Neither 
seemed  to  recollect  that  one  was  bitterly  angry, 
and  that  the  other  was  on  the  verge  of  melan- 
cholia. Instead,  Jack  declared  fervently: 

"  Aunt  Mary,  I've  made  up  my  mind  to  give 
you  the  time  of  your  life!  " 

And  Aunt  Mary  drew  a  sigh  of  relief  in  his 
words  and  anticipation  of  their  fulfillment. 

"  I'll  be  happy  takin'  care  of  you,"  she  said, 
benevolently.  "  My! — but  your  letter  scared  me. 
An'  yet  you  look  well." 

He  laughed. 

"  It's  the  knowing  you  were  coming  that's  done 
that,  Aunt  Mary.  You  ought  to  have  seen  me 


132    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

when  I  got  your  telegram.    I  almost  turned  a 
somersault." 

Aunt  Mary  smiled  rapturously  and  patted  his 
hand. 

And  just  then  they  drew  up  in  front  of  the 
house.  She  looked  out,  and  her  face  fell  a 
trifle. 

"  It's  awful  high  and  narrow,"  she  said. 

"  They  all  are,"  Jack  replied,  opening  the  car- 
riage door  and  jumping  out  to  receive  her. 

The  door  at  the  top  of  the  steps  opened,  and  a 
man  came  down  for  the  bags.  In  the  hall  above, 
a  pretty  maid  waited  with  a  welcoming  smile. 

Jack  piloted  his  aunt,  first  up  the  entrance  steps, 
and  then  up  the  staircase  within,  and  led  her  to  the 
lovely  room  which  had  been  vacated  for  her.  The 
maid  followed  with  tea  and  biscuits,  and  the  man 
brought  the  luggage  and  ranged  it  unobtrusively 
in  a  corner.  There  was  a  lavish  richness  about 
everything  which  made  Aunt  Mary  and  her  trunk 
appear  as  gray  and  insignificant  as  a  pair  of  mice, 
by  contrast ;  but  she  didn't  feel  it,  and  so  she  didn't 
mind  it. 

Jack  kissed  her  tenderly. 

'  Welcome  to  town,  Aunt  Mary,"  he  said  heart- 
ily, "  and  may  you  never  live  to  look  upon  this  day 
as  other  than  the  luckiest  of  your  life  I  "  Then, 
turning  to  the  servant,  he  said; 


AUNT   MARY  ENTRAPPED 

"Janice,  you  see  that  you  do  all  that  money  can 
buy  for  my  aunt." 

The  maid  courtesied.  She  had  arranged  the  tray 
upon  a  little  table  and  the  spout  of  the  tea  pot  and 
the  round  hole  in  the  middle  of  the  toast-cover  were 
each  pouring  forth  a  pleasant  suggestion. 

Aunt  Mary  began  at  once  to  haul  forth  her 
keys. 

"  Why,  Aunt  Mary,"  Jack  cried,  wondering  if 
her  nose  was  deaf,  too,  or  whether  she  didn't  feel 
hungry,  "  don't  you  see  your  tea?  Or  don't  you 
want  any?  " 

Aunt  Mary  thumbed  her  trunk  key. 

"I  want  a  nightgown,"  she  said;  "maybe  I'll 
want  something  else  later.  Maybe." 

"  You're  not  going  to  bed!  " 

She  drew  herself  up. 

"  I  guess  I  can  if  I  want  to;  I  guess  I  can. 
There's  the  bed  and  here's  me." 

;'  Whatever  are  you  saying?  It  isn't  half-past 
six  o'clock." 

"  I'm  not  prayin*  about  anything,"  said  the 
old  lady.  "  I  don't  pray  about  things.  I  do 
'em  when  needful.  And  when  I'm  tired  I  go 
to  bed." 

"  All  right,  Aunt  Mary,"  with  sugary  sweetness 
and  lamb-like  submissiveness.  "  I  thought  we'd 
dine  out  together,  but  if  you  don't  want  to  we 


134    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

needn't.     And  if  you  feel  like  it  when  you  waken, 
we  can." 

"  Dine  out,"  said  Aunt  Mary, blankly;  "has  the 
cook  left  ?  I  never  was  a  great  approver  of  goin' 
and  eatin'  at  boarding  houses." 

''  Well,  never  mind,"  Jack  said  in  a  key  pitched 
to  rhyme  with  high  C.  "  I'll  leave  you  now — and 
we  can  see  about  everything  later." 

He  kissed  her,  and  retired  from  the  room. 

"  Did  he  say  we're  goin'  out  to  dinner?  "  Aunt 
Mary  asked,  when  she  was  left  alone  with  the  maid, 
who  hurried  to  take  her  bonnet  and  shawl,  and  get 
her  into  juxtaposition  with  the  tea-tray  as  rapidly 
as  possible. 

'  Yes,  ma'am,"  the  girl  screamed,  nodding. 

"  I  don't  want  to,"  said  the  old  lady  firmly. 
"  Lots  of  trouble  comes  through  gettin'  out  of 
house  habits.  I've  come  here  to  take  care  of  a 
sick  boy  and  not  to  go  gallivantin'  round  myself. 
I've  seen  the  evils  of  gallivantin'  a  good  deal 
lately  and  I  don't  want  to  see  no  more.  Not  here 
and  not  nowhere." 

Then  she  began  to  eat  and  drink  and  reflect,  all 
at  the  same  time. 

"  By  the  way,  what's  your  name?  "  she  asked, 
suddenly.  "  Jack  didn't  tell  me." 

"  Janice,  ma'am." 

"  Granite  ?  "  said  Aunt  Mary.     "  What  a  funny 


135 

idea  to  name  you  that !  Did  they  call  you  for  the 
tinware  or  for  the  rocks?  " 

"  I  don't  know,"  shrieked  Janice,  who  was  busily 
occupied  in  unpacking  the  traveler's  trunk. 

Her  new  mistress  watched  her  with  a  critical  eye 
at  first,  but  it  became  a  more  or  less  sleepy  eye  as 
the  warmth  of  the  tea  meandered  slowly  through 
its  owner.  There  was  a  battle  within  Aunt  Mary's 
brain;  she  wanted  to  please  Jack,  and  she  was 
almost  dead  with  sleep. 

"  Do  you  think  that  I  ought  to  try  and  go  out 
with  my  nephew  to-night?  "  she  asked  Janice. 

"  If  it  was  me,  I  should  go,"  cried  the  maid. 

"  I  never  was  called  slow  before,"  Aunt  Mary 
said,  bridling.  "  I'll  thank  you  to  remember  your 
place,  young  woman." 

Janice  explained. 

"  Oh !  I  didn't  hear  plainly,"  said  Aunt  Mary. 
"  I  don't  always.  Well  go  or  not  go,  I've  got  to 
sleep  first.  I'm  dreadfully  sleepy,  and  I've  always 
been  a  great  believer  in  sleepin'  when  you're 
sleepy." 

The  fact  of  the  sleepiness  was  so  evident  that  no 
attempt  was  made  to  gainsay  it.  Janice  brought 
down  a  quilt  from  the  closet  and  tucked  her  charge 
up  luxuriously  on  the  great  bed.  Five  minutes 
later  she  was  in  dreamland. 

Jack  came  in  about  seven  and  looked  at  her. 


136    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  She  mustn't  be  disturbed,"  he  said  thought- 
fully. "  If  she  wakes  up  before  ten  we'll  go  out 
then." 

She  awoke  about  nine,  and  when  she  opened  her 
eyes  the  first  thing  that  she  saw  was  Janice,  sitting 
near  by. 

"  I  feel  real  good,"  said  Aunt  Mary. 

"  I'm  so  glad,"  yelled  Janice,  and  smiled,  too. 

The  old  lady  sat  up. 

"  J.  believe  I  could  have  gone  out,  after  all," 
she  said.  "  Only  I  don't  want  to  take  dinner 
anywhere." 

Then  she  paused  and  reflected.  It  was  surpri- 
sing how  good  she  felt  and  how  she  did  want  to 
make  Jack  happy.  "  After  all  boys  will  be  boys," 
she  thought,  tenderly,  "  an'  I  ain't  but  seventy, sol 
don't  see  why  I  shouldn't  go  out  with  him  if  he 
wants  to.  I'm  a  great  believer  in  doin'  what  you 
want  to — I  mean,  in  doin'  what  other  folks  want 
you  to.  At  any  rate  I'm  a  great  believer  in  it 
sometimes.  To-day — this  time." 

"  Your  nephew  is  waiting,"  the  maid  howled. 
"  Shall  I  tell  him  you  want  to  go  after  all?  " 

"  Is  it. late?  "  the  old  lady  inquired. 

"  Oh,  dear,  no !  " 

"  Wouldn't  you  go  if  you  was  me?  "  asked  the 
old  lady. 

Janice  smiled. 


AUNT   MARY  ENTRAPPED  137 

"  Indeed  I  would." 

Aunt  Mary  rose.  A  flood  of  metropolitan  fever 
suddenly  surged  up  and  around  and  over  and 
through  her. 

'  Tell  him  I'll  be  down  in  five  minutes,"  she  said. 

"  Can  you  change  in  that  time  ?  "  Janice  stopped 
to  shriek. 

"  What  should  I  change  for?  "  Aunt  Mary  de- 
manded in  astonishment.  "  Ain't  I  all  dressed 
now?  " 

Janice  did  not  attempt  to  shriek  any  counter- 
advice,  and  while  she  was  gone  to  find  Jack,  her 
mistress  brushed  herself  in  some  places,  soaped  her- 
self in  others,  and  considered  her  toilet  made. 
When  Janice  returned  she  caught  up  a  loose  lock 
of  hair,  and  put  the  placket-hole  of  her  skirt  square 
in  the  middle  of  Aunt  Mary's  back,  and  dared  go 
no  further.  There  was  an  air  even  about  the  back 
of  Jack's  influential  aunt  which  forbade  too  much 
liberty  to  those  dealing  with  her. 


Chapter  Fourteen 

AUNT   MARY    EN  FETE 

A  ""NT  MARY  descended  the  stairs  about 
half-past  nine;  she  thought  it  was  about  a 
quarter  to  eight,  but  the  difference  between 
the  hour  that  it  was  and  the  hour  that  she  thought 
that  it  was  will  be  all  the  same  a  hundred  years 
from  now. 

Jack  came  out  of  the  Louis  XIV.  drawing  room 
when  he  heard  her  step  in  the  hall.  There  was 
another  young  man  with  him. 

"  This  is  my  friend  Burnett,  Aunt  Mary,"  her 
nephew  roared.  "  You  must  excuse  his  not  bow- 
ing lower,  but  you  know  he  broke  his  collarbone 
recently." 

Aunt  Mary  shook  hands  warmly;  she  knew  all 
about  the  ribs  and  the  collarbone,  because  they  had 
formed  big  items  in  the  testimony  which  had  mo- 
mentarily and  as  momentously  relegated  Jack  to 
the  comradeship  of  the  devil  himself,  in  her  eyes. 
However,  she  recalled  them  merely  as  facts  now — 
not  at  all  in  a  disagreeable  way — and  gave  Burnett 
an  extra  squeeze  of  good-fellowship,  as  she  said: 

"  You  had  a  narrow  escape,  young  man." 
138 


AUNT    MARY    EN    FETE  139 

"  I  didn't  have  any  escape  at  all,"  said  Burnett. 
"  The  escape  went  down  at  the  back,  and  I  had  to 
jump  from  a  cornice." 

"  Burnett  is  going  out  to  dine  with  us,  Aunt 
Mary,"  said  Jack.  "  There's  so  little  he  can  eat 
on  account  of  his  ribs  that  he's  a  good  dinner  guest 
for  me." 

Jack's  aunt  felt  vaguely  uncomfortable  over  this 
allusion  to  her  grand-nephew's  circumstances,  and 
coughed  in  slight  embarrassment. 

Burnett  opened  the  door,  and  the  carriage  lamp 
shone  below.  (Is  there  ever  anything  more 
delightfully  suggestive  than  a  carriage  lamp  shin- 
ing down  below?)  They  took  her  down  and 
put  her  in,  and  the  carriage  rolled  away. 

It  was  that  June  when  "  Bedelia  "  covered  nearly 
the  whole  of  the  political  horizon;  it  was  the  date  of 
June  when  West  Point,  Vassar,  the  Blue,  the  Red, 
the  Black  and  Yellow  and  every  known  device  for 
getting  rid  of  young  and  growing-up  America  are 
all  cast  loose  at  once  on  our  fair  land.  The  streets 
were  a  scene  of  glorious  confusion,  and  but  for 
Aunt  Mary  no  considerations  could  have  kept  Bur- 
nett's collar-bone  and  Jack's  melancholia  cooped 
up  in  a  closed  carriage.  As  it  was,  they  were  both 
fidgeting  like  two  youthful  Uncle  Sams  in  a  Euro- 
pean railway  coupe,  when  the  latter  suddenly  ex- 
claimed: "Here  we  are!"  and  threw  open  the 


140    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

door  as  he  spoke.  Then  he  got  out  and  Burnett 
got  out  and  between  them  they  got  Aunt  Mary  out. 

Aunt  Mary  regarded  the  awning  and  carpet  and 
general  glitter  with  a  more  or  less  appalled  gaze. 

"Looks  like "  she  began;  and  was  inter- 
rupted by  a  voice  at  her  side : 

"Hello,  Jack!" 

"Hello,  Clover!" 

She  turned  and  saw  him  of  the  pale  mustache 
whom  we  once  met  in  Mrs.  Rosscott's  drawing 
room.  He  was  in  no  wise  altered  since  that  occa- 
sion except  that  his  attire  was  slightly  more  re- 
splendent and  he  had  on  a  silk  hat. 

Jack  shook  hands  warmly  and  then  he  turned 
to  his  relative. 

"Aunt  Mary,  this  is  my  friend  Clover;  he's 
often  heard  me  speak  of  you." 

"  Glad  to  meet  you,  Mr.  Rover,"  said  Aunt 
Mary,  cordially,  and  she,  too,  shook  hands  with 
that  cordiality  that  flourishes  beyond  city  limits. 

Her  nephew  bent  over  her  ear-trumpet. 

"  Clover!  "  he  howled,  with  all  the  strength  he 
owned. 

"I  heard  before,"  said  Aunt  Mary,  somewhat 
coldly. 

"  Come  on  and  dine  with  us,  Clover,"  said  Jack; 
"that'll  make  four."  (By  the  way,  isn't  it  odd 
how  many  people  ask  their  friends  to  dinner  for 


AUNT    MARY    EN    FETE  141 

the  simple  reason  that,  arithmetically  considered, 
each  counts  as  one !) 

"  All  right,  I  will,"  said  Clover,  in  his  languid 
drawl. 

Aunt  Mary  saw  his  lips. 

"  It's  no  use  my  deceivin'  you  as  to  my  bein'  a 
little  hard  of  hearin',"  she  said  to  him,  "  because 
you  can  see  my  ear-trumpet;  so  I'll  trouble  you  to 
say  that  over  again." 

"  All  right,  I  will,"  Clover  wailed,  good- 
humoredly. 

"  What?  "  asked  Aunt  Mary.    "  I  didn't " 

Jack  cut  her  short  by  leading  the  party  inside. 

The  scene  within  was  as  gorgeous  with  golden 
stucco  as  the  dining-room  of  a  German  liner.  Aunt 
Mary  was  so  overcome  that  she  traversed  half  the 
room  before  she  became  aware  of  the  mighty  at- 
tention which  she  and  her  three  escorts  were  at- 
tracting. In  truth,  it  is  not  every  day  that  three 
good-looking  young  men  take  a  tiny  old  lady,  a 
bunch  of  violets  and  an  ear-trumpet  out  to  dine 
at  ten  o'clock. 

"  Everyone's  lookin',"  she  said  to  Jack. 

"  It's  your  back,  Aunt  Mary,"  he  replied,  in  a 
voice  that  shook  some  loose  golden  flakes  from  tne 
ceiling.  "  I  tell  you,  not  many  women  of  your  age 
have  a  back  like  yours,  and  don't  you  forget  it." 

The  compliment  pleased  Aunt  Mary,  because 


142    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

she  had  all  her  life  been  considered  round-shoul- 
dered. It  also  pleased  her  because  she  never  had 
received  many  compliments.  The  Aunt  Marys  of 
this  world  love  flattery  just  as  dearly  as  the  Mrs. 
Rosscotts;  the  sad  part  of  life  is  that  they  rarely 
get  any.  The  women  like  Mrs.  Rosscott  know 
why  the  Aunt  Marys  go  unflattered,  but  the  Aunt 
Marys  never  understand.  It's  all  sad — and 
true — and  undeniable. 

They  went  to  a  table,  and  were  barely  seated 
when  another  man  came  up. 

"Hello,  Jack!" 

"Hello,  Mitchell!" 

It  was  he  of  Scotch  ancestry.  Jack  sprang  up 
and  greeted  him  with  warmth,  then  he  turned  to 
Aunt  Mary. 

"  Aunt  Mary,"  he  screamed,  "  this  is  my 
friend " — he  paused,  put  on  all  steam  and 
ploughed  right  through — "  Herbert  Kendrick 
Mitchell." 

44 1  didn't  catch  that  at  all,"  said  Aunt  Mary, 
calmly,  "  but  I'm  just  as  glad  to  meet  the  gentle- 
man." 

Mitchell  clasped  her  hand  with  an  expression 
as  burning  as  if  it  was  real. 

"  I  declare,"  he  yelled  straight  at  her,  "  if  this 
isn't  what  I've  been  dreaming  towards  ever  since 
I  first  knew  Jack," 


AUNT    MARY   EN    FETE  143 

Aunt  Mary  fairly  shone. 

"  Dear  me,"  she  began,  "  if  I'd  known " 

"  You'd  better  dine  with  us,  Mitchell,"  said 
Jack;  "  that'll  make  five." 

"  It  won't  make  but  three  for  me,"  said  Mitch- 
ell. "  I  haven't  had  but  two  dinners  before 
to-night." 

Clover  smiled  because  he  heard,  and  Aunt  Mary 
smiled  because  she  didn't,  but  was  happy  anyway. 
She  had  altogether  forgotten  that  she  had 
demurred  at  dining  out.  They  all  sat  down  and 
shook  out  their  napkins.  Mitchell  and  Clover 
shook  Aunt  Mary's  for  her  and  gave  it  a  beautiful 
cornerways  spread  across  her  lap. 

Then  the  waiter  laid  another  plate  for  Mitchell, 
and  brought  oyster  cocktails  for  everyone.  Aunt 
Mary  eyed  hers  with  early  curiosity  and  later  sus- 
picion; and  she  smelled  of  it  very  carefully. 

"  I  don't  believe  they're  good  oysters,"  she 
said. 

"  Yes,  they  are,"  cried  Mitchell  reassuringly. 
His  voice,  when  he  turned  it  upon  her,  was  pitched 
like  a  clarionet.  The  blind  would  surely  have  seen 
as  well  as  the  deaf  have  heard  had  there  been  any 
candidates  for  miracles  in  his  immediate  vicinity. 
"  They're  first-class,"  he  added,  "  you  just  go  at 
them  and  see." 

The  reassured  took  another  whiff. 


144    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

'  You  can  have  mine,"  she  said  directly  after- 
wards; and  there  was  an  air  of  decision  about  her 
speech  which  brooked  no  opposition.  Yet  Mitch- 
ell persisted. 

"Oh,  no,"  he  yelled;  "you  must  learn  how. 
Just  throw  your  head  back  and  take  'em  quick — 
after  the  fashion  that  they  eat  raw  eggs,  don't 
youvknow?  " 

"  But  she  can't,"  said  Clover.  "  There's  too 
much,  particularly  as  she  isn't  used  to  them.  I'll 
tell  you,  Miss  Watkins,"  he  cried,  hoisting  his  own 
voice  to  the  masthead,  "  you  eat  the  oysters,  and 
leave  the  cocktail.  That's  the  way  to  get  gradually 
trained  into  the  wheel." 

Aunt  Mary  thought  some  of  obeying;  she  fished 
out  one  oyster,  wiped  it  carefully  with  a  bit  of 
bread,  regarded  it  with  more  than  dubious  coun- 
tenance, and  then  suddenly  decided  not  to. 

"  I'd  rather  be  at  home  when  I  try  experiments," 
she  said,  decidedly;  and  the  waiter  carried  off  her 
cocktail  and  gave  her  food  that  was  good  beyond 
question  thereafter. 

The  dinner  went  with  zest.  It  was  an  enliven- 
ing party  that  consumed  it,  and  what  they  con- 
sumed with  it  enlivened  them  still  more.  The 
gentlemen  soon  reached  the  point  where  they  could 
laugh  over  jokes  they  could  not  understand,  and 
the  one  lady  member  became  equally  merry  over 


AUNT    MARY    EN    FETE  145 

wit  that  she  did  not  hear.  She  forgot  for  the 
nonce  that  there  were  any  phases  of  life  in  which 
she  was  not  a  believer,  and  whether  this  was  owing 
to  the  surrounding  gayety  or  to  the  champagne 
which  they  persuaded  her  to  taste  it  is  not  my 
province  to  explain. 

"  Now  we  must  lay  our  lines  for  events  to  come," 
Jack  said,  when  they  advanced  upon  the  dessert 
and  prepared  to  occupy  an  extensive  territory  of 
ices,  fruit,  and  jellied  something  or  other.  "  It 
would  be  a  sin  for  Aunt  Mary  to  leave  this  famous 
battlefield  without  a  few  honorable  scars!  We 
must  take  her  out  in  a  bubble  for  one  thing 
and " 

"  In  mine !  "  cried  Clover.  "  To-morrow ! 
Why  can't  she? — I  held  up  my  hand  first?  " 

"All  right,"  said  Jack;  "to-morrow  she's 
your's.  At  four  o'clock." 

"  She  must  have  goggles,"  cried  Mitchell. 
"  She  must  have  goggles  and  be  all  fixed  up,  and 
when  you  have  got  her  the  goggles  and  she  has 
been  all  fixed  up,  I  ask,  as  a  last  boon,  that  I  may 
go  along,  just  so  as  to  see  everyone  who  sees  her." 

"  We'll  all  go,"  Clover  explained.  "  I'll '  chuff  ' 
her  myself  and  then  there'll  be  room  for  every- 
one." 

"  To  the  auto  and  to  to-morrow !  "  cried  Bur- 
nett, hastily  pouring  out  a  fresh  toast,  which  even 


146    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Aunt  Mary  applauded,  not  at  all  knowing  what 
she  was  applauding. 

"  And  now  for  the  next  day,"  said  Jack.  "  I 
think  I'll  give  her  a  box-party.  Don't  you  want 
to  go  to  the  theater  in  a  box,  Aunt  Mary?  " 

u  Go  where  in  a  box?  "  said  Aunt  Mary,  start- 
ing a  little.  "  I  didn't  quite  catch  that." 

"  To  the  theater,"  Jack  yelled. 

"  To  the  theater,"  repeated  his  aunt  a  trifle 
blankly,  "  I " 

"  And  the  next  day,"  said  Mitchell  suddenly  (he 
had  been  reflecting  maturely),  "  I'll  take  you  all 
up  the  sound  in  my  yacht." 

"  Oh,  hurrah,"  cried  Burnett,  "  that'll  be  bully! 
And  the  day  after  I'll  give  her  a  picnic." 

"  Time  of  your  life,  Aunt  Mary,"  Jack  shrieked 
in  her  ear-trumpet ;  "  time  of  your  life !  " 

"  Dear  me ! "  said  Aunt  Mary,  "  I  don't 
just " 

"Aunt  Mary!  glasses  down!"  cried  Clover; 
"  may  she  live  forever  and  forever." 

"  To  Aunt  Mary,  glasses  up,"  said  Mitchell. 
"  Glasses  up  come  before  glasses  down  always. 
It's  one  of  the  laws  of  Nature — human  nature — 
also  of  good  nature.  Here's  to  Aunt  Mary,  and  if 
she  isn't  the  Aunt  Mary  of  all  of  us  here's  a  hoping 
she  may  get  there  some  day;  I  don't  just  see  how, 
but  I  ask  the  indulgence  of  those  present  on  the 


AUNT   MARY   EN   FETE 

plea  that  I  have  indulged  quite  a  little  myself  to- 
night. Honi  soit  qui  mal  y  pense;  ora  pro  nobis, 
Erin-go-Bragh.  Present  company  being  present, 
and  impossible  to  except  on  that  account,  we  will 
omit  the  three  cheers  and  choke  down  the  tiger." 

They  all  drank,  and  the  dinner  having  by  this 
time  dwindled  down  to  coffee  grounds  and  cheese 
crumbs  a  vote  was  taken  as  to  where  they  should 
go  next. 

Aunt  Mary  suggested  home,  but  she  was  over- 
ruled, and  they  all  went  elsewhere.  She  never 
could  recollect  where  she  went  or  what  she  saw; 
but,  as  everyone  else  has  been  and  seen  over  and 
over  again,  I  won't  fuss  with  detailing  it. 

The  visitor  from  the  country  reached  home  in 
a  carriage  in  the  small  hours  in  the  morning, 
and  Janice  received  her,  looking  somewhat 
nervous. 

"  This  is  pretty  late,"  she  ventured  to  remind  the 
bearers;  but  as  they  didn't  seem  to  think  so,  and  she 
was  a  maiden,  wise  beyond  her  years,  she  spoke  no 
further  word,  but  went  to  work  and  undressed  the 
aged  reveller,  got  her  comfortably  established  in 
bed,  and  then  left  her  to  get  a  good  sleep,  an  occu- 
pation which  occupied  the  weary  one  fully  until 
two  that  afternoon. 

When  she  did  at  last  open  her  eyes  it  was  sev- 
eral minutes  before  she  knew  where  she  was.  Her 


148    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

brain  seemed  dazed,  her  intellect  more  than 
clouded.  It  is  a  state  of  mind  to  which  those  who 
habitually  go  about  in  hansoms  at  the  hour  of  dawn 
are  well  accustomed,  but  to  Aunt  Mary  it  was  pain- 
fully new.  She  struggled  to  remember,  and  felt 
helplessly  inadequate  to  the  task.  Janice  finally 
came  in  with  a  glass  of  something  that  foamed  and 
fizzed,  and  the  victim  of  late  hours  drank  that  and 
came  to  her  senses  again.  Then  she  recollected. 

"  My !  but  I  had  a  good  time  last  night !  "  she 
said,  putting  her  hand  to  her  head.  "  What  time 
is  it  now,  anyhow  ?  " 

"  Breakfast  time,"  cried  the  handmaiden. 
"  You'll  have  just  long  enough  to  eat  and  dress 
leisurely  before  you  go  out." 

"Oh!  "  said  Aunt  Mary  blankly;  "where  'm 
I  goin'  ?  Do  you  know  ?  " 

"  Mr.  Denham  told  me  that  you  had  promised 
to  attend  an  automobile  party  at  four." 

"  Oh,  yes,"  said  Aunt  Mary  hastily.  "  I 
guess  I  remember.  I  guess  I  do.  I  saw  Jack 
wanted  to  go,  so  I  said  I'd  go,  too.  I'm  a  great 
believer  in  lettin'  the  young  enjoy  themselves." 

She  looked  sharply  at  Janice  as  she  spoke,  but 
Janice  was  serene. 

"  I  didn't  come  to  town  to  do  anything  but  make 
Jack  happy,"  continued  Aunt  Mary,  "  and  I  see 
that  he  won't  take  any  fresh  air  without  I  go  along 


AUNT    MARY    EN    FETE  149 

— so  I  shall  go  too  while  I'm  here.  Mostly.  As 
a  general  thing." 

"  Mr.  Mitchell  called  and  left  these  flowers  with 
his  card,"  Janice  said,  opening  a  huge  box  of  roses; 
"  and  a  man  brought  a  package.  Shall  I  open  it?  " 

Aunt  Mary's  wrinkles  fairly  radiated. 

"Well,  did  I  ever!"  she  exclaimed.  "Yes; 
open  it." 

Janice  proceeded  to  obey,  and  the  package  was 
found  to  contain  an  automobile  wrap,  a  pair  of 
goggles  and  a  note  from  Clover. 

"  My  gracious  me  1  "  cried  Aunt  Mary. 

"  Mr.  Denham  sent  the  violets,"  Janice  said, 
pointing  to  a  great  bowl  of  lilac  and  white 
blossoms. 

Just  then  the  doorbell  rang,  and  it  was  a  ten- 
pound  box  of  candy  from  Burnett. 

Aunt  Mary  collapsed  among  her  pillows. 

u  I  never  did !  "  she  murmured  feebly,  and  then 
she  suddenly  exclaimed:  "An'  to  think  of  me  livin' 

up  there  all  my  life  with  plenty  of  money " 

she  stopped  short.  I  tell  you  when  you  come  to 
New  York  on  a  mission  and  stay  for  the  Bac- 
chanalia it  is  hard  to  hold  consistently  to  either 
standard. 

But  Janice  had  gone  for  her  lady's  breakfast,  and 
after  the  lady  had  eaten  it  and  had  herself  dressed 
for  the  day's  joys,  Jack  knocked  at  the  door. 


150    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Well,  Aunt  Mary,"  he  roared,  when  he  was 
let  in,  "  if  you  don't  look  fine!  You're  the  fresh- 
est of  the  bunch  to-day,  sure.  You'll  be  ready  for 
another  night  to-night,  and  you've  only  to  say 
where,  you  know." 

"Granite  did  my  hair,"  said  his  aunt;  "you 
must  praise  her,  not  me." 

"  And  you've  got  your  goggles  all  ready,  too," 
he  continued.  "Who  sent  'em?" 

"  Oh,  I  shan't  wiggle,"  said  Aunt  Mary 
"  although  I  can't  see  how  it  could  hurt  if  I  did." 

"  Come  on  and  let's  dress  her  up,"  said  Jack  to 
the  maid,  "  Glory!  what  fun!  " 

Thereupon  they  went  to  work  and  rigged  the  old 
lady  out.  She  was  certainly  a  sight,  for  she  stood 
by  her  own  bonnet,  and  that  failed  to  jibe  with  the 
goggles. 

Burnett  was  summoned  in  to  view  the  proceed- 
ings, but  just  as  he  caught  the  first  glimpse  he  was 
taken  with  a  fearful  cramp  in  his  broken  ribs  and 
was  forced  to  beat  the  hastiest  sort  of  a  retreat. 

"  I  hope  he'll  get  over  it  and  be  able  to  go  out 
with  us,"  said  Aunt  Mary  anxiously. 

"  I  guess  he'll  recover,"  Jack  yelled  cheerfully. 
"Oh,  there's  Clover!" 

A  sort  of  dull,  ponderous  panting  sounded  in  the 
street  without,  and  let  all  the  neighbors  know  that 
"  The  Threshing  Machine  "  (as  Clover  had  chris- 


AUNT   MARY   EN   FETE  151 

tened  his  elephantine  toy)  was  waiting  for  some- 
one. 

Its  owner  came  in  for  a  stirrup  cup;  Mitchell 
was  with  him.  Both  were  togged  out  as  if  entered 
for  the  annual  Paris-Bordeaux. 

Burnett  brought  out  the  cut-glass  jugs. 

"  Ye  gods  and  little  fishes !  Sapristi !  Sacre 
bleu !  "  he  said  to  his  friends.  "  Just  you  wait 
till  you  see  our  Aunt  Mary !  " 

"  Has  she  got  'em  all  on  ?  "  Clover  asked. 

"  Has  she  got  'em  all  on !  "  said  Burnett.  "  She 
has  got  'em  all  on;  and  how  Jack  held  his  own  in 
the  room  with  her  I  cannot  understand.  I  took 
one  look,  and  if  mine  had  been  a  surgical  case  of 
stitches  the  last  thread  would  have  bust  that  instant. 
I  don't  believe  I  dare  go  out  with  you.  This  is  a 
life  and  death  game  to  Jack,  and  I  won't  risk 
smashing  his  future  by  not  being  able  to  keep  sober 
in  the  face  of  Aunt  Mary." 

"  Oh,  come  on,"  Clover  urged  in  his  wiry  voice. 
"  You  needn't  look  at  her;  or,  if  you  do  look  at  her, 
you  can  look  the  other  way  right  afterwards,  you 
know." 

"  I'll  sit  next  to  her,"  Mitchell  explained.  "  As 
a  sitter  by  Aunt  Mary's  side  I  shone  last  night;  and 
where  a  man  has  sat  once,  the  same  man  can  surely 
sit  again." 

Burnett  hesitated,  and  just  then  voices  were  heard 


152    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

in  the  hall.  Jack  and  Janice  were  convoying  Aunt 
Mary  below. 

Mitchell  went  out  into  the  hall. 

"  Well,  Miss  Watkins,"  he  said,  in  a  tone  such 
as  one  would  use  to  call  down  Santos-Dumont, 
"  I'm  mighty  glad  to  see  you  looking  so  well." 

Aunt  Mary  turned  the  goggles  full  upon  him. 

"  A  present  from  Mr.  Clover,"  she  said  smiling. 

"  I  never  knew  him  to  take  so  much  trouble  for 
any  lady  before,"  said  Mitchell;  and  as  she  arrived 
just  then  at  the  foot  of  the  staircase  he  pressed  her 
proffered  hand  warmly  and  forthwith  led  her  in 
upon  the  two  men  in  the  library. 

She  looked  exactly  like  a  living  edition  of  one  of 
the  bug  pictures,  and  Clover  had  to  think  and  swal- 
low fast  and  hard  to  keep  from  being  overcome. 
But  he  was  true  blue,  and  came  out  right  side  up. 
Aunt  Mary  was  acclaimed  on  all  sides,  and  es- 
corted to  the  "  bubble." 

Burnett  couldn't  resist  going,  too,  at  the  last 
moment;  but,  as  his  ribs  were  really  tender  yet,  he 
sat  in  front  with  Clover.  Jack  and  Mitchell  sat 
behind,  and  deftly  inserted  the  honored  guest  be- 
tween them. 

"  It's  an  even  thing  as  to  which  is  the  ear- 
trumpet  side,"  Mitchell  said,  as  they  all  stood 
about  preparatory  to  climbing  in.  "  Of  course, 
that  side  don't  need  to  holler  quite  so  loud;  but 


AUNT   MARY   EN   FETE  153 

then,  to  balance,  he  may  get  his  one  and  only  pair 
of  front  teeth  knocked  out  any  minute." 

"  I'll  take  that  side,"  said  Jack.  "  I'm  used  to 
fighting  under  the  inspiration  of  the  trumpet." 

"  And  God  be  with  you,"  said  his  friend  piously. 
"  May  he  watch  over  you  and  bring  you  out  safe 
and  whole — teeth,  eyes,  etc." 

"  Come  on,"  said  Clover  impatiently;  "  don't 
you  know  this  thing's  getting  up  power  and  you're 
wasting  it  talking." 

"  Curious,"  laughed  Burnett.  "  I  never  knew 
that  it  was  gasolene  that  men  were  consuming  when 
they  kept  an  automobile  waiting." 

And  then  they  got  in  and  were  off — a  merry 
load,  indeed. 

"  Dear  me,  but  it's  a-goin' !  "  Aunt  Mary  ex- 
claimed, as  the  thing  began  to  whiz  and  she  felt 
suddenly  impelled  to  clutch  wildly  at  her  flanking 
escorts.  "  Suppose  we  met  a  dog." 

"  We'd  leave  a  floor  mat,"  shrieked  Mitchell. 
"  Oh,  but  isn't  this  great — greater — greatest?  " 

"  Time  of  your  life,  Aunt  Mary !  "  Jack  howled, 
as  they  went  over  a  boarded  spot  in  the  pavement, 
and  the  old  lady  nearly  went  over  the  back  in 
consequence.  "  You're  in  for  the  time  of  your 
life!" 

"  How  do  you  like  it?  "  yelled  Clover,  throwing 
a  glance  over  his  shoulder. 


154    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Aunt  Mary  started  to  answer,  but  they  came  to 
four  car  tracks  one  after  another,  and  the  succes- 
sive shocks  rendered  her  speechless. 

"  Where  are  we  going?  "  Burnett  asked. 

"  Nowhere,"  said  Clover.  "  Just  waking  up 
the  machine."  And  he  turned  on  another  million 
volts  as  he  spoke. 

"  Oh,  my  bonnet!  "  cried  poor  Aunt  Mary,  and 
that  bit  of  her  adornment  was  in  the  street  and  had 
been  run  over  four  times  before  they  could  slow 
up,  turn  around,  and  get  back  to  the  scene  of  its 
output. 

It  speaks  volumes  for  the  permeating  atmos- 
phere of  "  having  the  time  of  your  life  "  that  its 
owner  laughed  when  the  wreck  was  shown  to  her. 

"  I  don't  care  a  bit,"  she  said.  "  I  can  go  down 
to  Delmonico's  an'  get  me  another  to-morrow 
mornin',  easy." 

'What  a  trump  you  are,  Aunt  Mary!"  said 
Jack  admiringly.  "  Here,  Burnett,  fish  her  out 
that  extra  cap  from  the  cane  rack;  there's  always 
one  in  the  bottom.  There — now  you  won't  take 
cold,  Aunt  Mary." 

The  cap,  with  its  fore-piece,  was  the  crowning 
glory  of  Aunt  Mary's  get-up.  The  brain  measure- 
ments of  him  who  had  bought  the  cap  being  to  its 
present  wearer's  as  five  is  to  three,  the  effect  of  its 
proportions,  in  addition  to  the  goggles  and  the 


AUNT   MARY   EN   FETE  155 

ear-trumpet,  was  such  as  to  have  overawed  a  sur- 
vivor of  Medusa's  stare. 

"  Oh,  I  say,"  said  Mitchell,  "  it's  a  sin  to  keep  as 
good  a  joke  as  this  in  the  family !  We  must  drive 
her  around  town  until  the  night  falls  down  or  the 
battery  burns  out." 

"  I  say  so  too,"  said  Burnett.  "  This  is  more 
sport  than  oiling  railroad  tracks  and  seeing  old 
Tweedwell  brought  up  for  it.  Say,  set  her  a-buzz- 
ing  again.  It's  a  big  game,  isn't  it?  " 

Clover  thought  so,  with  the  result  that  they 
speeded  through  tranquil  neighborhoods  and 
churned  leisurely  where  the  masses  seethed  until 
countless  thousands  were  wondering  what  under 
the  sun  those  four  young  fellows  had  in  the  back 
of  their  car. 

The  sad  part  about  all  good  fun  is  that  it  has  to 
end  sooner  or  later;  and  about  six  o'clock  the  whole 
party  began  to  be  aware  that,  if  refreshments  were 
not  taken,  their  end  was  surely  close  at  hand. 
They  therefore  called  a  brief  halt  somewhere  to 
get  what  is  technically  known  as  a  "  sandwich," 
and  the  results  were  thoroughly  satisfactory  to 
everyone  but  Aunt  Mary.  She  took  one  bite  of 
her  sandwich,  and  then  opened  it  with  an  abrupt- 
ness which  merged  into  disgust  when  it  proved  to 
be  full  of  fish  eggs. 

"  Why  didn't  you  tell  me  what  it  was  made  of?  " 


156    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

she  asked  in  annoyance.  "  I  feel  just  as  if  I'd 
swallowed  a  marsh — a  green  one  1  " 

"  That's  a  shame !  "  said  Clover  indignantly. 
"  I'll  get  you  something  that  will  take  that  taste 
out  of  your  mouth  double  quick.  Here!"  he 
called  to  a  waiter,  and  then  he  gave  the  man  certain 
careful  directions. 

The  latter  nodded  wisely,  and  a  few  minutes 
later  brought  in  a  tiny  glass  containing  a  pousse- 
caf  e  in  three  different  colors. 

"  It's  a  cocktail.  Drink  it  quick,"  Clover 
directed. 

Aunt  Mary  demurred. 

"  I  never  drank  a  cocktail,"  she  began. 

"  No  time  like  the  present  to  begin,"  said  Clover, 
"  you'll  have  to  learn  some  day." 

"  Cocktails,"  said  Mitchell,  "  are  the  advance 
guard  of  a  newer  and  brighter  civilization. 
They " 

"  If  she's  going  to  take  it  at  all  she  must  take  it 
now,"  said  Clover  authoritatively.  "  The  green 
and  the  yellow  are  beginning  to  run  together. 
Quick  now  I  " 

His  confiding  guest  drank  quick  and  became  the 
three  different  colors  quicker  yet. 

"  What's  the  matter?  "  Jack  asked  anxiously. 

Aunt  Mary  was  speechless. 

"  He  mixed  it  wrong,"  said  Clover    in  a  sad, 


AUNT   MARY   EN    FETE  157 

discouraged  tone.  "  What  she  ought  to  have  got 
first  she  got  last,  that's  all.  The  cocktail  is  upside 
down  inside  of  her,  and  the  effect  of  it  is  upside 
down  on  the  outside  of  her." 

"Feel  any  better  now,  Aunt  Mary?"  Jack 
yelled. 

"  I  can't  seem  to  keep  the  purple  swallowed," 
said  the  poor  old  lady.  "  I  want  to  go  home. 
I've  always  been  a  great  believer  in  going  home 
when  you  feel  like  I  do  now.  In  general — as  a 
rule." 

"  I  would  strongly  recommend  your  obeying  her 
wishes,"  said  Mitchell,  with  great  earnestness. 
"There's  a  time  for  all  things,  and,  in  my  opinion, 
she's  had  about  all  the  queer  tastes  that  she  can 
absorb  for  to-day.  Things  being  as  they  are  and 
mainly  as  they  shouldn't  be,  I  cast  my  vote  in  with 
what  looks  as  if  it  would  soon  become  the  losing 
side,  and  vote  to  bubble  back  for  all  we're 
worth." 

There  was  a  general  acquiescence  in  his  view  of 
the  case,  which  led  them  all  to  pile  into  "  The 
Threshing  Machine  "  with  unaffected  haste  and 
rush  Aunt  Mary  bedward  as  rapidly  as  was  pos- 
sible considering  the  hour  and  the  policemen. 

Janice  received  her  mistress  with  the  tender  wel- 
come that  every  prodigal  may  count  on  and  was 
especially  expeditious  with  tea  and  toast  and  a 


158    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT    MARY 

robe  de  nuit.  Aunt  Mary  sighed  luxuriously  when 
she  felt  herself  finally  tucked  up. 

"  After  all,  Granite,"  she  said  dreamily,  "  there's 
nothin'  like  gettin'  stretched  out  to  think  it  over — 
is  there?" 

But  Janice  was  turning  out  the  lights. 


Chapter  Fifteen 

AUNT  MARY  ENTHRALLED 

JACK'S  aunt  slept  long  and  dreamlessly  again. 
That  thrice-blessed  sleep  which  follows 
nights  abroad  in  the  metropolis. 

When,  toward  four  o'clock,  Aunt  Mary  opened 
her  eyes,  she  was  at  first  almost  as  hazy  in  her 
conceptions  as  she  had  found  herself  upon  the  pre- 
vious day. 

"  I  feel  as  if  the  automobile  was  runnin*  up  my 
back  and  over  my  head,"  she  said,  thoughtfully 
passing  her  hand  along  the  machine's  imaginary 
course.  Then  she  rang  her  bell  and  Janice  ap- 
peared from  the  room  beyond. 

"  I  guess  you'd  better  give  me  some  of  that 
that  you  gave  me  yesterday,"  the  elderly  lady  sug- 
gested; "  what  do  you  think?  " 

"  Yes,  indeed,"  said  Janice — and  went  at  once 
and  brought  it  in  separate  glasses  on  a  tray,  and 
mixed  it  by  pouring,  while  Aunt  Mary  looked  on 
with  an  intuitive  understanding  that  passed  instinct 
and  bordered  on  a  complete  comprehension  of 
things  to  her  hitherto  unknown. 

159 


160    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  They'd  ought  to  advertise  that,"  she  said,  as 
she  set  down  the  empty  glass  a  few  seconds  later. 
"  There'd  be  a  lot  of  folks  who'd  be  glad  to  know 
there  was  such  a  thing  when  they  first  wake  up 
mornin's  after — after — well,  mornin's  after  any- 
thin'.  It's  jus'  what  you  want  right  off;  it  sort  of 
runs  through  your  hair  and  makes  you  begin  to 
remember." 

4  Yes,  ma'am,"  said  Janice,  turning  to  put  down 
the  tray,  and  then  crossing  the  room  to  seek  some- 
thing on  the  chimney-piece. 

Aunt  Mary  gave  a  sudden  twist, — as  if  the  drink 
had  infused  an  effervescing  energy  into  her  frame. 
"  Well  what  am  I  goin'  to  do  to-day?  "  she  asked. 

"  Mr.  Denham  has  written  out  your  engage- 
ments here,"  said  Janice,  handing  her  a  jeweler's 
box  as  she  spoke. 

Aunt  Mary  tore  off  the  tissue  paper  with  trem- 
bling haste — lifted  the  cover — and  beheld  a  tiny 
ivory  and  gold  memoranda  card. 

"  Well,  that  boy !  "  she  ejaculated. 

"  Shall  I  read  the  list  aloud  to  you?  "  the  maid 
inquired. 

"  Yes,  read  it." 

So  Janice  read  the  dates  proposed  the  night  be- 
fore and  Aunt  Mary  sat  up  in  bed,  held  her  ear- 
trumpet,  and  beamed  beatifically. 

'*  I  don't  believe  I  ever  can  do  all  that,"  she  said 


AUNT    MARY   ENTHRALLED         161 

when  Janice  paused;  "  I  never  was  one  to  rush 
around  pell-mell,  but  I've  always  been  a  great 
believer  in  lettin'  other  folks  enjoy  themselves  an' 
I  shall  try  not  to  interfere." 

Janice  hung  the  tiny  memoranda  up  beside  its 
owner's  watch  and  stood  at  attention  for  further 
orders. 

"  But  I  d'n  know  I'm  sure  what  I  can  wear  to- 
night," continued  the  one  in  bed ;  "  you  know  my 
bonnet  was  run  over  yesterday." 

"Was  it?" 

"  Yes, — it  was  the  most  sudden  thing  I  ever  saw. 
I  thought  it  was  the  top  of  my  head  at  first." 

"Was  it  spoiled?" 

"  Well,  it  wouldn't  do  for  me  again  and  I  don't 
really  believe  it  would  even  do  for  Lucinda.  We 
didn't  bring  it  home  with  us  anyhow  an'  so  its  no 
use  talkin'  of  it  any  more.  I'm  sure  I  wish  I'd 
brought  my  other  with  me.  It  wasn't  quite  as 
stylish,  but  it  set  so  good  on  my  head.  As  it  is  I 
ain't  got  any  bonnet  to  wear  an'  we're  goin'  in  a 
box,  Jack  says, — I  should  hate  to  look  wrong  in  a 
box." 

"  But  ladies  in  boxes  do  not  wear  anything," 
cried  Janice  reasuringly. 

Aunt  Mary  jumped. 

"  Not  anything?  " 

"  On  their  heads." 


162    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Oh !— Well,  then  the  bonnet  half  of  me  '11 
be  all  right,  but  what  shall  I  wear  on  the  rest  of 
me?  I  don't  want  to  look  out  of  fashion,  you 
know.  My,  but  I  wish  I'd  brought  my  Paisley 
shawl.  I've  got  a  Paisley  shawl  that's  a  very  rare 
pattern.  There's  cocoanuts  in  the  border  and  a 
twisted  design  of  monkeys  and  their  tails  done  in 
the  center.  An'  there  ain't  a  moth  hole  in  it — 
not  one." 

Janice  looked  out  of  the  window. 

"  I've  got  a  cameo  pin,  too,"  continued  Aunt 
Mary  reflectively.  "  My,  but  that's  a  handsome 
pin,  as  I  remember  it.  It's  got  Jupiter  on  it  holdin' 
a  bunch  of  thunder  and  lightnin'  an'  receivin'  the 
news  of  somebody's  bein'  born — I  used  to  know  the 
whole  story.  But,  you  see,  I  expected  to  just  be 
sittin'  by  Jack's  bed  and  I  never  thought  to  bring 
any  of  those  dress-up  kind  of  things,"  she  sighed. 

Janice  returned  to  the  bed  side. 

"  Hadn't  you  better  begin  to  dress?  "  she  howled 
suggestively.  "  They  are  going  to  dine  here  before 
going  to  the  theater  and  dinner  is  ordered  in  an 
hour." 

"  Maybe  I  had,"  said  Aunt  Mary,  "  but — oh 
dear — I  don't  know  what  I  will  wear!  "  She 
began  to  emerge  from  the  bedclothes  as  she  spoke. 

"  How  would  my  green  plaid  waist  do?  "  she 
asked  earnestly. 


AUNT   MARY   ENTHRALLED         163 

"  I  think  it  would  be  lovely,"  shrieked  the  maid. 

"  Well,  shake  it  out  then,"  said  Aunt  Mary,  "  it 
ought  to  be  in  the  fashion — all  the  silk  they  put  in 
the  sleeves.  An'  if  you'll  do  my  hair  just  as  you 
did  it  yesterday — " 

"  Yes,  I  will." 

Then  the  labor  of  the  toilette  began  in  good 
earnest,  and  three-quarters  of  an  hour  later  Aunt 
Mary  was  done,  and  sitting  by  the  window  while 
Janice  laced  her  boots. 

A  rap  sounded  at  the  door. 

"  Come  in,"  cried  the  maid. 

It  was  Jack  with  a  regular  fagot  of  American 
Beauties. 

"  Well,  Aunt  Mary,"  he  cried  with  his  cus- 
tomary hearty  greeting.  "  How !  " 

"  How  what?  "  asked  Aunt  Mary,  whose  knowl- 
edge of  Sioux  social  customs  had  been  limited  by 
the  border  line  of  New  England. 

Jack  laughed.  "How  are  you?"  he  asked  in 
correction  of  his  imperfect  phrasing.  And  then  he 
handed  over  the  rose  wood. 

"  I'm  pretty  well,"  said  his  aunt;  "but,  my  good- 
ness, you  mustn't  bring  me  so  many  presents — 
you " 

Jack  stopped  her  words  with  a  kiss.  "  Now, 
Aunt  Mary,  don't  you  scold,  because  you're  my 
company  and  I  won't  have  it.  This  is  my  treat, 


164    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

and  just  don't  you  fret.  What  do  you  say  to  your 
roses?  " 

Aunt  Mary  looked  a  bit  uneasy. 

"  They're  pretty  big,"  she  hesitated. 

"That's  the  fashion,"  said  Jack;  "the  longer 
you  can  buy  'em  the  better  the  girls  like  it.  I  tried 
to  get  you  some  eight  feet  long  but  they  only  had 
two  of  that  number  and  I  wanted  the  whole  bunch 
to  match " 

He  was  interrupted  by  another  rap  on  the  door. 

"Hallo!  "he  cried.     "  Come  in." 

It  was  Mitchell  with  several  dozen  carnations, 
the  most  brilliant  yet  prized — or  priced. 

"  Well,  I  declare !  "  exclaimed  Aunt  Mary. 

"  For  you,  Miss  Watkins,"  cried  the  newcomer, 
gracefully  offering  his  homage,  "  with  the  assur- 
ance of  my  sincere  regret  that  I  came  on  the  scene 
too  late  to  have  been  making  a  scene  with  you  fifty 
years  ago." 

"  I  didn't  quite  catch  that,"  said  Aunt  Mary, 
rapturously.  But  never  mind, — Granite,  get  a  tin 
basin  or  suthin'  for  these  flowers." 

"  Where's  Burnett?  "  Jack  asked  the  newcomer, 
— "  isn't  he  dressed?  It's  getting  late." 

"  He's  all  right,"  said  Mitchell;  "he  and  Clover 
are — here  they  are !  " 

The  two  came  in  together  at  that  second. 
Clover's  mustache  just  showed  over  the  top  of  the 


AUNT   MARY   ENTHRALLED         165 

largest  bunch  of  violets  ever  constructed,  and  Bur- 
nett bore  with  assiduous  care  a  bouquet  of  orchids 
tied  with  a  Roman  sash. 

Aunt  Mary  leaned  back  and  shut  her  eyes.  If 
it  hadn't  been  for  her  smile,  they  might  possibly 
have  feared  for  her  life. 

But  she  was  only  momentarily  stunned  by  sur- 
passing ecstasy. 

"  You'd  better  put  some  water  in  the  bath-tub, 
Granite,"  she  said,  recovering,  "  nothing  else  will 
be  big  enough." 

The  four  young  men  drew  up  chairs  and  rivalled 
her  smiles  with  theirs. 

"  I  d'n  know  how  I  ever  can  thank  you,"  said 
the  old  lady  warmly.  "  I've  always  had  such  a 
poor  opinion  o'  life  in  cities,  too !  " 

"  Life  in  cities,  my  dear  Miss  Watkins," 
screamed  Mitchell,  "  is  always  pictured  as  very 
black,  but  it's  only  owing  to  the  soft  coal — not  to 
the  people  who  burn  it." 

Aunt  Mary  smiled  again. 

"  I  guess  the  bath-tub  will  be  big  enough  to  keep 
'em  fresh,"  she  said  simply,  and  Mitchell  gave 
up  and  dried  his  forehead  with  his  handker- 
chief. 

They  dined  at  home  upon  this  occasion  and  after- 
wards took  two  carriages  for  the  theater.  Aunt 
Mary,  Jack,  Clover,  the  American  Beauties  and 


166    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

the  violets  went  in  the  first,  and  what  remained  of 
the  party  and  the  floral  decorations  followed  in 
the  second. 

"  I  mean  to  smoke,"  said  that  part  of  the  sec- 
ond load  which  habitually  answered  to  the  name  of 
Mitchell.  "  There  is  nothing  so  soothing  when  you 
have  thorns  in  your  legs  as  a  cigarette  in  your 
mouth." 

"  Too — too;  "  laughed  his  companion.  "  Jim- 
iny!  but  our  aunt  is  game,  isn't  she?  " 

"To  my  order  of  thinking,"  said  Mitchell, 
thoughtfully  scratching  a  match,  "  Aunt  Mary 
has  been  hung  up  in  cold  storage  just  long  enough 
to  have  acquired  the  exactly  proper  gamey  flavor. 
It  cannot  be  denied  that  to  worn,  worldly,  jaded 
mortals  like  you  and  me,  the  sight  of  fresh,  ever 
bubbling,  youthful  enthusiasm  like  hers  is  as  thrill- 
ing and  trilling  and  rilling  as — as — as "  he 

paused  to  light  his  cigarette. 

"  Yes,  you'd  better  stutter,"  said  Burnett.  "  I 
thought  you  were  running  ahead  of  your  proper 
signals." 

"  It  isn't  that,"  said  Mitchell,  puffing  gently. 
"  It  is  that  I  suddenly  recollected  that  I  was  alone 
with  you,  and  my  brains  tell  me  that  it  is  a  waste 
of  brains  to  use  them  in  the  sense  of  a  plural  noun 
with  you.  The  word  in  your  company, — my  dear 
boy — only  comes  to  me  as  a  verb — as  an  active 


AUNT   MARY   ENTHRALLED         167 

verb — and  dear  knows  how  often  I  have  itched  to 
apply  it  forcibly." 

Then  they  drew  up  in  front  of  the  theater  and 
saw  Aunt  Mary  being  unloaded  just  beyond. 

"  Great  Scott,  I  feel  as  if  I  was  a  part  of  a 
poster!  "  said  Burnett,  diving  into  the  carriage 
depths  for  the  last  lot  of  flowers. 

"  I  feel  as  if  I  were  a  part  of  the  Revelation," 
said  Mitchell,  "  I  mean — the  Revel-eration." 

They  rapidly  formed  on  somewhat  after  the 
plan  of  the  famous  "  Marriage  under  the  Di- 
rectoire."  Aunt  Mary  commanded  the  center- 
rush,  leaning  on  Jack's  arm,  and  the  rest  acted  as 
half-backs,  left  wings,  or  flower-bearers,  just  as  the 
reader  prefers. 

They  made  quite  a  sensation  as  they  proceeded 
to  their  box  and  more  yet  when  they  entered  it. 
They  were  late — very  late — as  is  the  privilege  of 
all  box  parties  and  their  seating  problem  absorbed 
the  audience  to  a  degree  never  seen  before  or  since. 

Jack  put  Aunt  Mary  and  her  green  plaid  waist 
in  the  middle  and  flanked  her  with  purple  violets 
and  red  carnations.  The  ear-trumpet  was  laid  upon 
the  orchids  just  where  she  could  reach  it  easily. 
Then  her  escorts  took  positions  as  a  sort  of  half- 
moon  guard  behind  and  each  held  two  or  three 
American  Beauties  straight  up  and  ck>wn  as  if  they 
were  the  insignia  of  his  rank  and  office. 


168    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

The  effect  was  gorgeous.  The  very  actors  saw 
and  were  interested  at  once.  They  directed  all 
their  attention  to  that  one  box,  and  at  the  end  of 
the  act  the  stage  manager  got  the  writer  of  the 
topical  song  on  the  wire  and  had  a  brand  new  and 
very  apropos  verse  added  which  brought  down  the 
house. 

Jack  and  his  party  caught  on  and  clapped  like 
mad,  Aunt  Mary  beat  the  front  of  the  box  with  her 
ear-trumpet,  and  when  Clover  suggested  that  she 
throw  some  flowers  to  the  heroine  she  threw  the 
orchids  and  came  near  maiming  the  bass  viol  for 
life.  Burnett  rushed  out  between  acts  and  bought 
her  a  cane  to  pound  with,  Jack  rushed  out  between 
more  acts  and  bought  her  a  pair  of  opera  glasses, 
Mitchell  rushed  out  between  still  further  acts  and 
procured  her  one  of  those  Japanese  fans  which  they 
use  for  fire-screens,  and  agitated  it  around  her  dur- 
ing the  rest  of  the  evening. 

"  Time  of  your  life,  Aunt  Mary,"  Jack  vocifer- 
ated under  the  cover  of  a  general  chorus;  "  Time 
of  your  life  I  " 

"  Oh,  my,"  said  Aunt  Mary,  heaving  a  great 
sigh,  "  seems  if  I'd  die  when  I  think  of  Lucinda." 

They  got  out  of  the  theater  somewhat  after 
eleven  and  Clover  took  them  all  to  a  French  cafe 
for  supper,  so  that  again  it  was  pretty  well  along 
into  the  day  after  when  Janice  regained  her  charge. 


AUNT   MARY   ENTHRALLED         169 

"  Granite,"  said  Aunt  Mary  very  solemnly, 
as  she  collapsed  upon  her  bed  twenty  minutes  later 
yet,  "  put  it  down  on  that  memoranda  for  me  never 
to  find  no  fault  with  nothing  ever  again.  Never — 
not  ever — not  never  again." 

The  second  day  after  was  that  which  had  been 
set  for  Mitchell's  yachting  party.  They  allowed 
a  day  to  lapse  between  because  a  yachting  party  has 
to  begin  early  enough  so  that  you  can  see  to  get  on 
board.  Mitchell  wanted  his  to  begin  early  enough 
so  that  they  could  see  the  yacht  too. 

"  A  yacht,  Miss  Watkins,"  he  said  into  the  ear- 
trumpet,  "  is  a  delight  that  it  takes  daylight  to 
delight  in.  If  my  words  sound  somewhat  mixed, 
believe  me,  it  is  the  effect  of  what  is  to  come 
casting  its  shadow  before.  I  speak  with  under- 
standing and  sympathy — you  will  know  all  later." 

Aunt  Mary  smiled  sweetly.  Sometimes  she 
thought  that  Mitchell  was  the  nicest  of  the  three — 
times  when  she  wasn't  talking  to  Clover  or  Burnett. 

Jack  took  his  aunt  out  to  drive  on  the  afternoon 
of  the  intervening  day  and  bought  her  a  blue  suit 
with  a  red  tape  around  one  arm,  and  some  rubber- 
soled  shoes,  and  a  yachting  cap  and  a  mackintosh. 
There  was  something  touching  in  Aunt  Mary's 
joyful  confidence  and  anticipation — she  having 
never  been  cast  loose  from  shore  in  all  her  life. 


170    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  When  do  you  s'pose  we'll  get  home?"  she 
asked  Jack. 

"  Oh,  some  time  toward  night,"  he  replied. 

She  smiled  with  a  trust  as  colossal  as  Trusts 
usually  are. 

"  I'm  sure  I  shall  have  a  good  time,"  she  said. 
"  I  always  liked  to  see  pictures  of  waves." 

"  You'll  see  the  real  things  now,  Aunt  Mary," 
cried  her  nephew  heartily.  He  was  not  a  bit  mali- 
cious, possessing  a  stomach  whose  equilibrium  could 
not  conceive  any  other  anatomical  condition. 

Janice,  however,  had  doubts,  and  on  the  morn- 
ing of  the  next  day  her  doubts  deepened.  She 
looked  from  the  window  and  shook  her  head. 

"  Feel  a  fly?  "  inquired  Aunt  Mary. 

"  No,  I  see  some  clouds,"  yelled  her  maid. 

"  I  didn't  ask  you  to  speak  loud,"  said  the  old 
lady.  "  I  always  hear  what  you  say.  Always." 

Janice  went  out  of  the  room  and  voiced  her  views 
of  the  weather  to  the  proprietors  of  the  expedition. 
The  proprietors  were  having  an  uproarious  break- 
fast on  ham  and  eggs — all  but  Mitchell,  who  sat 
somewhat  aloof  and  contented  himself  with  an  old 
and  reliable  breakfast  food  long  known  to  his 
race. 

"  Are  you  really  going  to  take  her  up  the  Sound 
to-day?"  the  maid  demanded  of  the  merry  mob. 

"  I'm  not,"  said  Burnett;  "  it's  the  yacht  that's 


AUNT   MARY   ENTHRALLED         171 

going  to  take  her.  Pass  the  syrup,  Jack,  like  the 
jack  you  are." 

"Doesn't  she  feel  well?"  Jack  asked,  passing 
the  syrup  as  requested.  "If  she  doesn't  feel  well, 
of  course,  we  won't  go." 

"  I  like  that,"  said  Mitchell,  "  when  it's  my 
day  for  my  party  and  my  cook  all  provisioned  with 
provisions  for  provisioning  us  all.  How  long  do 
you  suppose  ice  cream  stays  together  in  this  month 
of  roses,  anyhow?  " 

"  She  is  very  well,"  said  the  maid  quietly,  "  but 
it's  blowing  pretty  fresh  here  in  the  city  and  I 
thought  that  out  on»the  Sound " 

"  Blowing  fresh,  is  it?  "  laughed  Burnett;  "  well, 
it'll  salt  her  fast  enough  when  we  get  out.  Don't 
you  fuss  over  what's  none  of  your  business,  my 
dear  girl;  just  trot  along  upstairs  and  dress  dolly, 
and  when  she's  dressed  we'll  take  her  off  your 
hands." 

Jack  appeared  unduly  quiet. 

"  Do  you  think  it  is  going  to  storm?  "  he  asked 
Mitchell.  Mitchell  was  scraping  his  saucer  with 
the  thrift  that  thrives  north  of  the  Firth  of  Forth 
and  hatches  yachts  on  the  west  shores  of  the 
Atlantic. 

"  I  don't  think  at  all  during  vacation,"  he  said 
mildly.  "  I  repose  and  reap  '  Oh's  ' — from  other 
people." 


112    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  If  there  was  any  chance  of  a  storm ?  " 

said  the  nephew,  thoughtfully. 

"  Fiddle-dee-dee,"  said  Burnett  impatiently, 
"  what  do  you  think  yachts  are  for,  anyhow?  To 
let  alone?  "  He  looked  at  the  maid  as  he  spoke 
and  pointed  significantly  to  the  door.  She  went  out 
at  once  and  returned  upstairs  to  her  mistress  whom 
she  found  quite  restless  to  "  get-a-goin'  "  as  she 
expressed  it. 

The  boxes  filled  with  yesterday's  purchases  were 
brought  out  at  once  and  Janice  proceeded  to  rubber- 
sole  and  blue-serge  Aunt  Mary.  The  latter  re- 
garded every  step  of  the  performance  in  the  huge 
three-fold  cheval  glass  which  had  been  wont  to  tell 
Mrs.  Rosscott  things  that  every  woman  longs  to 
know. 

When  her  toilette  was  complete  it  must  be  ad- 
mitted that  as  a  yachtswoman  Aunt  Mary  fairly 
outshone  her  automobile  portrait.  She  surveyed 
herself  long  and  carefully. 

"  I  expect  it'll  be  quite  an  experience,"  she  said 
with  many  new  wrinkles  of  anticipation. 

"  Yes,"  said  Janice,  with  a  glance  at  the  flutter- 
ing window  curtains,  "  I  expect  it  will  be." 

Aunt  Mary  went  downstairs  and  was  greeted 
with  loud  acclamations.  The  breakfast  party 
broke  up  at  once  and,  while  Janice  phoned  for  cabs, 
Aunt  Mary's  quartette  of  escorts  sought  hats,  coats, 


AUNT    MARY    ENTHRALLED         173 

etcetera.  After  that  they  all  sallied  forth  and 
took  their  places  as  joyfully  as  ever. 

It  was  quite  a  long  drive  to  where  "  Ladty 
Belle  "  had  been  brought  up,  and  they  had  to  stop 
once  to  lay  in  two  or  three  pounds  of  current 
literature. 

"  Do  you  read  mostly?  "  asked  Aunt  Mary. 

"  It's  best  to  be  on  the  safe  side,"  said  Clover 
vaguely. 

Then  they  entered  the  tangle  of  docks  and 
express  wagons  and  obstacles  in  general  and  Mitch- 
ell had  great  difficulty  in  finding  where  his  launch 
had  been  taken  to  meet  them. 

But  at  last  they  got  Aunt  Mary  down  a  flight  of 
very  slippery  steps  and  into  a  boat  whose  every- 
thing was  labeled  "  Lady  Belle,"  and  Mitch- 
ell said  something  and  they  cast  loose  and 
were  off. 

"  Seems  rather  a  small  yacht,"  said  Aunt  Mary, 
glancing  cheerfully  about.  "  I  ain't  surprised  that 
you'd  rather  come  in  nights." 

"  Bless  your  heart,  Aunt  Mary,"  shrieked  Jack, 
"this  isn't  the  yacht,  this  is  the  way  we  get  to 
her." 

"  Oh,"  said  Aunt  Mary  blankly. 

"  That's  the  yacht,"  yelled  Burnett,  "  that  white 
one  with  the  black  smoke  coming  out  and  the 
sail  up." 


174    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  What  are  they  getting  up  steam  for?  "  asked 
Clover.  '  The  time  to  get  up  steam  is  when  you 
get  down  sails  generally." 

1  They  aren't  getting  up  steam,"  said  Mitchell, 
"  they're  getting  up  dinner.  It  looks  like  a  lot  of 
smoke  because  of  the  shadow  on  the  sail.  And, 
speaking  of  getting  up  dinner,  reminds  me  that  the 
topic  before  us  now  is,  how  in  thunder  are  we  to  get 
up  Aunt  Mary?" 

"  Put  a  rope  around  her  and  board  her  as  if  she 
was  a  cavalry  horse,"  suggested  Burnett. 

"  I  scorn  the  suggestion,"  said  their  host;  "  if 
the  worst  comes  to  the  worst  I  can  give  her  a  back 
up,  but  I  trust  that  Aunt  Mary  will  rise  to  the 
heights  of  the  sail  and  the  situation  all  at  once  and 
not  make  me  do  any  vertebratical  stunts  so  early  in 
the  day." 

They  were  running  alongside  of  "  Lady  Belle  " 
as  he  spoke,  and  the  first  thing  Aunt  Mary  knew 
she  and  her  party  were  attached  to  the  former  by 
some  mysterious  and  not  altogether  solid  con- 
nection. 

"  What  do  we  do  now?  "  she  asked  uneasily. 

u  I'll  show  you,"  laughed  Burnett,  and  seizing 
two  flapping  ropes  he  went  skipping  up  a  sort  of 
stepladder  and  sprang  upon  the  deck  above. 

Aunt  Mary  started  to  emulate  his  prowess  and 
stood  up  at  once.  But  the  next  second  she  sat 


AUNT   MARY   ENTHRALLED         175 

down  extremely  hard  without  knowing  why  she 
had  done  so. 

"  Hold  on,  Miss  Watkins,"  Mitchell  cried  has- 
tily; "  just  you  hold  on  until  I  give  you  something 
to  hold  on  to,  and  when  you've  got  something  to 
hold  on  to,  please  keep  holding  on  to  it,  until  I  tell 
you  that  the  hour  has  come  in  which  to  let  go 
again." 

"  I  didn't  quite  catch  that,"  said  Aunt  Mary, 
"  but  I'm  ready  to  do  anythin'  you  say  if  you 

only "  and  again  she  sprang  up  and  again  was 

thrown  down  as  hard  as  before. 

"  Look  out,"  cried  Jack,  springing  to  her  side; 
and  he  got  hold  of  his  valuable  relative  and  held 
her  fast  while  Mitchell  grasped  the  ladder  and  a 
sailor  strove  to  keep  the  launch  still. 

"  Now,  Aunt  Mary,"  cried  the  nephew,  "  hang 
on  to  me  and  hang  on  to  those  ropes  and  remember 
I'm  right  back  of  you " 

"  My  Lord  alive,"  cried  Aunt  Mary,  turning  her 
gaze  upwards,  "  am  I  expected  to  go  alone  all  that 
way  to  the  top?  " 

"  It'll  pay  you  to  keep  on  to  the  top,"  screamed 
Clover;  "  you'll  have,  comparatively  speaking,  very 
little  fun  if  you  hang  on  to  the  ladder  all  day — 
and  you'll  get  so  wet  too." 

'  There's  more  room  at  the  top,"  cried  Mitchell, 
"  there's  always  room  at  the  top,  Miss  Watkins. 


176    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Put  yourself  in  the  place  of  any  young  man  enter- 
ing a  profession  and  struggle  bravely  upwards, 
bearing  ever  in " 

"  Oh,  I  never  can,"  said  Aunt  Mary,  recoiling 
abruptly;  "  I  never  could  climb  trees  when  I  was 
little — I  never  had  no  grip  in  my  legs — and  I  just 
know  I  can't.  It's  too  high.  An'  it  looks  slip- 
pery. An'  I  don't  want  to,  anyhow." 

"What  rot!"  yelled  Jack,  "the  very  idea! 
Why,  Aunt  Mary,  you  know  you  can  skin  up  there 
just  like  a  cat  if  you  only  make  up  your  mind  to  it. 
Here,  Mitchell,  give  her  a  boost  and  I'll  plant 
her  feet  firmly.  Now — have  you  got  hold  of 
the  ropes,  Aunt  Mary  ?  " 

"  Oh,  mercy — on — me !  "  wailed  Aunt  Mary, 
"  the  yacht  is  turnin'  a-round  an'  the  harder  I  pull 
the  faster  it  turns." 

"  Catch  her  from  above,  Burr,"  Clover  called 
excitedly;  "  hook  her  with  anything  if  you  can't 
reach  her  with  your  hand." 

"  Oh,  my  cap !  "  shrieked  poor  Aunt  Mary,  and 
the  cap  went  off  and  she  went  on  up  and  was  landed 
safe  above. 

"  How  on  the  chart  do  you  suppose  we'll  ever 
unload  her?  "  Jack  asked,  wide-eyed,  as  he  swung 
himself  quickly  after  her. 

'  What  man  hath  done  man  can  do,"  quoted 
Mitchell  sententiously,  following  his  lead. 


AUNT   MARY   ENTHRALLED         177 

"  But  no  man  ever  unloaded  Aunt  Mary," 
Clover  reminded  him,  as  they  brought  up  the  rear. 

Then  they  were  all  on  deck,  a  chair  was  brought 
for  the  honored  guest,  and  Mitchell  introduced  his 
sailing-master  who  had  been  drawn  to  gaze  upon 
the  rather  novel  manner  in  which  she  had  been 
brought  aboard. 

"  I  want  Miss  Watkins  to  have  the  sail  of  her 
life,  Renfew,"  said  Mitchell.  "  We  aren't  coming 
back  until  night." 

"  We'll  have  sail  enough  sure,  sir,"  said  Renfew, 
touching  his  cap,  and  then  he  walked  away  and  the 
work  of  starting  off  began.  A  tug  had  been 
engaged  to  tow  them  out  into  the  breeze  and  Jack 
thought  it  would  be  nice  to  show  Aunt  Mary 
around  while  they  were  being  meandered  through 
coal  barges,  etc.  They  went  below  and  Aunt  Mary 
saw  everything  with  a  most  flattering  interest. 

"  I  d'n  know  but  what  I'd  enjoy  a  little  yacht 
of  my  own,"  she  said  to  Mitchell.  "  I  think  it's 
so  amusin'  the  way  everythin'  turns  over  into 
suthin'  else.  I  suppose  Joshua  could  learn  to  sail 
me — I  wouldn't  want  to  trust  no  new  man,  I 
know." 

'  Why,  of  course,"  said  Jack,  "  and  we  could 
all  come  and  visit  you,  Aunt  Mary." 

Aunt  Mary  smiled  hospitably. 

"  I'd  be  glad  to  see  you  all  any  day,"  she  said 


178    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

cordially;  "  and  I  shall  have  a  hole  in  the  bottom 
of  the  boat  for  people  to  go  in  and  out  of,  and  a 
nice  staircase  down  to  it,  so  you  needn't  mind  the 
notion  of  how  you'll  get  on  and  off." 

They  all  laughed  and  continued  the  tour  below 
and  Aunt  Mary  grew  more  and  more  enthusiastic 
for  quite  a  while.  She  liked  the  kitchen  and  she 
liked  the  dining-room.  She  thought  the  arrange- 
ment for  keeping  the  table  level  most  ingenious. 
Mitchell  took  her  into  the  main  cabin  and  told  her 
that  that  was  hers  for  the  day.  On  the  dresser 
was  a  photograph  of  the  "  Lady  Belle  "  framed  in 
silver,  which  the  young  host  presented  to  his  guest 
as  a  souvenir  of  the  "  voyage." 

Aunt  Mary's  pleasure  was  at  its  height.  Oh, 
the  pity  of  Fate  which  makes  the  apex  of  every- 
thing so  very  limited  as  to  standing  room! 
Three  minutes  after  the  presentation  and  accep- 
tation of  the  photograph  Aunt  Mary's  glance 
became  suddenly  vague,  and  then  especially 
piercing. 

"  What  makes  this  up  and  down  feeling?  "  she 
asked  Mitchell. 

"  What  up  and  down  feeling?  "  he  asked,  secure 
in  the  good  conscience  and  pure  living  of  an  oat- 
meal breakfast.  "  I  don't  feel  up  and  down." 

"  I  do,"  said  Aunt  Mary  abruptly;  "  I  want  to 
be  somewhere  else." 


AUNT   MARY   ENTHRALLED         179 

"  You  want  to  be  on  deck,"  said  Burnett,  sud- 
denly emerging  from  somewhere ;  "  I  know  the 
symptoms.  I  always  have  'em.  Come  on.  And 
when  we  get  up  there,  I'll  collar  Jack  for  urging 
those  six  last  griddle  cakes  on  me  this  morning." 

"  I  ain't  sure  I  want  to  be  on  deck,"  said  Aunt 
Mary;  "  dear  me — I  feel  as  if  I  wasn't  sure  of 
anythin'." 

"What  did  I  tell  you?"  said  Burnett  to 
Mitchell;  "  it's  blowing  fresh  and  neither  she  nor 
I  ought  to  have  come.  You  know  me  when  it 
blows." 

"  Shut  up,"  said  Mitchell,  hurrying  Aunt  Mary 
up  the  companion-way  and  shoving  her  into  one 
chair  and  her  feet  into  another;  "there,  Miss 
Watkins,  you're  all  right  now,  aren't  you?  " 

"  What's  the  matter?  "  said  Jack,  coming  from 
somewhere  aloft  or  astern.  "  Heaven  bless  me, 
what  ails  you,  Aunt  Mary?  " 

"  I  don't  wonder  I'm  pale,"  said  Aunt  Mary 
faintly,  "  oh— oh " 

"  We  must  put  our  heads  together,"  said  Bur- 
nett, taking  a  drink  from  a  flask  that  he  took  out 
of  his  pocket ;  "  I  must  soon  put  my  head  on  some- 
thing, and  your  aunt  looks  to  me  to  feel  the  same 
way.  Mitchell,  why  did  you  let  me  forget  that 
vow  I  made  last  time  to  never  come  again?  " 

"  Your  vows  to  never  do  things  again  are  about 


180    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

as  stable  as  your  present  hold  on  an  upright  posi- 
tion," said  Clover,  laying  a  steadying  hand  upon 
his  friend's  waveringness.  "  Sit  down,  little  boy, 
sit  down." 

Burnett  sat  down,  Mitchell  smiled.  Jack 
laughed,  and  Aunt  Mary  groaned. 

The  boat  was  rising  and  falling  rapidly  now, 
and  as  she  ran  further  and  further  out  into  the 
ever  freshening  wind  she  kept  on  rising  and  falling 
yet  more  rapidly.  The  more  motion  there  was 
the  more  Aunt  Mary  seemed  to  sift  down  in  her 
two  chairs. 

"  We'd  better  put  back,"  said  Jack;  "  this  won't 
do,  you  know.  How  do  you  feel  now,  Aunt 
Mary?  "  he  added,  leaning  over  her. 

Aunt  Mary  opened  her  eyes  and  looked  at  him 
but  made  no  reply. 

"  Ask  me  how  I  feel,  if  you  dare,"  said  Burnett, 
from  where  his  chair  was  drawn  up  not  far  away. 
"  I  couldn't  kill  you  just  now,  but  I  will  some  day 
I  promise  you." 

He  was  very  white  and  had  a  look  about  his 
mouth  that  showed  that  he  meant  what  he  said. 

Some  bells  rang  somewhere. 

"  That's  dinner,"  exclaimed  Clover. 

Aunt  Mary  gave  a  piercing  cry. 

"  Oh,  take  me  somewhere  else,"  she  said,  throw- 
ing her  hands  up  to  her  face ;  "  somewhere  where 


AUNT   MARY   ENTHRALLED         181 

there'll  never  be  nothin'  to  eat  again.  I — I  can't 
bear  to  hear  about  eatin'." 

"  I'm  going  to  take  her  down  into  one  of  the 
cabins,"  said  Jack  hastily;  "  she  belongs  in  bed." 

"  No,  turn  back  the  carpet  and  lay  me  in  the 
bathtub,"  almost  sobbed  the  poor  victim;  "  I 
don't  feel  like  I  could  get  flat  enough  anywhere 
else." 

"  She  has  the  proper  spirit,"  said  Burnett 
faintly,  "  only  I  don't  feel  as  if  I  could  get  flat 
enough  anywhere  at  all.  What  in  the  name  of 
the  Great  Pyramid  ever  possessed  me  to  come?  " 

Mitchell  rose  quickly  to  his  feet. 

"  You  put  your  aunt  to  bed,  Jack,"  he  said, 
"  and  I'll  put  my  yacht  to  backing.  This  expe- 
dition is  expeditiously  heading  on  to  what  might  be 
termed  a  failure.  I  can  see  that,  even  if  we're  only 
in  a  Sound." 

"When  do  you  suppose  we'll  get  back?"  the 
nephew  asked  anxiously. 

"  About  four  o'clock,  if  we  don't  lose  time  by 
having  to  tack." 

"  I  didn't  quite  catch  all  that,"  said  Aunt  Mary, 
"  but  I  knew  suthin'  was  loose  all  along.  I  felt  it 
inside  of  me  right  off  at  first.  And  ever  since, 
too." 

Jack  gathered  her  up  in  his  arms  and  bore  her 
tenderly  away  to  the  beautiful  main  cabin. 


182    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  I  wanted  to  live  to  change  my  will,"  she  said 
sadly,  as  he  laid  her  down,  "  but  somehow  I  don't 
seem  to  care  for  nothin'  no  more." 

He  kissed  her  hand. 

"  They  say  being  seasick  is  awfully  good  for 
people,  Aunt  Mary,"  he  yelled  contritely. 

Aunt  Mary  opened  her  eyes. 

"  John  Watkins,  Jr.,  Denham,"  she  said,  "  if 
you  say  *  food '  to  me  again  ever,  I'll  never  leave 
you  a  penny — so  there!  " 

Jack  went  away  and  left  her. 

"  Come  on  to  dinner,  Burnett,"  Clover  called 
hilariously,  "  there's  liver  with  little  bits  of  bacon 
— your  favorite  dish." 

Burnett  snarled  the  weakest  kind  of  a  snarl. 

"  I  thought  I'd  suffered  enough  for  one  year 
last  month,"  he  murmured  in  a  voice  too  low  to  be 
heard,  and  then  he  knew  himself  to  be  alone  on 
deck. 

Down  in  the  little  dining-saloon  the  dishes  were 
hopping  merrily  back  and  forth  and  an  agreeable 
odor  of  agreeable  viands  filled  the  air.  Clover 
and  Jack  sat  down  opposite  their  host  and  they  all 
three  ate  and  drank  with  a  zest  that  knew  no  break- 
ing waves  nor  sad  effects. 

"  Here's  to  our  aunt,"  said  Clover  gayly,  as  the 
first  course  went  around ;  "  of  course,  we  all  love 
her  for  Jack's  sake,  but  at  the  same  time  I  offer 


AUNT   MARY   ENTHRALLED         183 

two  to  odds  that  it  is  a  pleasure  to  converse  in 
under  tones  occasionally.  Who  takes?" 

"  Aunt  Mary  being  laid  upon  her  bed,"  said 
Mitchell,  "  we  will  next  proceed  to  lay  the  motion 
of  our  honorable  friend  upon  the  table.  We 
regret  Aunt  Mary's  ill-health  while  we  drink  to 
her  good — quotation  marks  under  the  latter  word. 
Aunt  Mary! — and  may  she  arise  and  prosper  all 
the  way  down  into  the  launch  again." 

"  I'm  troubled  about  her,  really,"  said  Jack 
soberly;  "we  ought  to  have  brought  someone  to 
look  out  for  her." 

"  The  maid,"  cried  Mitchell,  "  the  dainty,  ador- 
able maid!  Here's  to  Janice  and "  his  speech 

was  brought  to  a  sudden  end  by  his  two  guests 
nearly  disappearing  under  the  table. 

Jack  started  up. 

"  Ginger!     Did  you  feel  that?  "  he  asked. 

"  That's  nothing,"  said  Mitchell,  calmly 
replacing  the  water-carafe  which  in  the  excitement 
of  the  moment  he  had  clasped  to  his  bosom ;  "  it's 
the  waves  which  are  rising  to  the  occasion — that's 
all."  But  Jack  had  hurried  out. 

He  found  poor  Aunt  Mary  writhing  in  an 
agony  of  misery.  "  Oh — oh — "  she  cried,  "  I  want 
to  be  still — I'm  too  much  tipped — and  all  the 
wrong  way !  I  want  to  lay  smooth — and  I  stand 
on  my  head — all  the " 


184    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  We're  going  back,"  said  Jack,  striving  to 
soothe  her;  "  lie  still,  Aunt  Mary,  and  we'll  soon 
get  there.  Do  you  want  some  camphor  to  smell?  " 

"  I  don't  feel  up  to  smellin',"  wailed  Aunt 
Mary,  "  I  don't  feel  up  to  anythin'.  Go  'way. 
Right  off." 

Jack  went  on  deck.  He  found  Burnett 
stretched  pale  and  green  upon  the  chairs  their 
lady  guest  had  vacated. 

"  If  you  speak  to  me  again,"  he  said,  in  halting 
accents,  "  I'll  never  speak  to  you  again.  Get 
out." 

Jack  went  back  to  his  place  at  dinner. 

"  How  are  they?  "  asked  Clover. 

"  I  don't  know,"  he  said  quietly,  "  but  there's 
a  big  storm  coming  up.  The  sky's  all  dark  blue 
and  it  looks  bad." 

"  I  don't  care,"  said  Mitchell,  sawing  into  the 
game  with  vigor;  u  if  we  go  down  we  go  down 
with  Aunt  Mary  and  if  I  were  Uncle  Mary  I 
wouldn't  feel  happier  and  safer  as  to  all  concerned. 
The  ship  that  bore  Caesar  and  his  fortune  had 
nothing  at  all  to  bear  compared  to  this  which  bears 
Jack  and  his.  Here's  to  Jack  and  his  fortune, 
and  may  we  all  survive  the  dark  blue  sky." 

"  I  tell  you  it's  serious,"  said  Jack.  As  he  spoke 
another  ominous  heaving  set  the  bottles  tipping 
and  nearly  sent  Clover  backwards. 


AUNT   MARY   ENTHRALLED         185 

"  And  I'm  serious,"  exclaimed  Mitchell.  "  I'm 
always  serious  only  I  never  can  get  any  girl  to 
believe  it.  Here's  to  me,  and  may  I  grow  more 
and  more  serious  each " 

A  tremendous  wave  bore  the  yacht  upright  and 
then  let  her  fall  on  her  forelegs  again.  Clover 
went  over  backwards  and  the  dish  of  peas  to  which 
he  had  just  been  helping  himself  followed  after. 

"  You  didn't  say  '  excuse  me  '  when  you  left  the 
table,"  said  Mitchell,  whom  the  law  of  gravitation 
had  suddenly  raised  to  a  pinnacle  from  which  he 
viewed  his  friends  with  mirthful  scorn ;  "  and  if 
you've  hurt  yourself  it  must  be  a  judgment  on  you 
for  leaving  the  table  without  saying  '  excuse  me.' 
Here's  to  Clover,  who  has  a  judgment  and  a  dish 
of  peas  served  on  him  at  the  same  time  for  leaving 
the  table  without  saying  *  excuse  me.' ' 

The  sailing-master  appeared  at  the  door,  his 
cap  in  his  hand. 

"  I  beg  your  pardon,  sir,"  he  said  respectfully, 
"  but  I  fear  it's  impossible  to  put  back.  We  can't 
turn  without  getting  into  the  trough  of  the  sea." 

"  All  right,  go  ahead  then,"  said  Mitchell;  "  go 
where  we  must  go,  and  do  what  you've  got  to  do. 
My  motto  is  veni,  vidi,  vici,  which  freely  trans- 
lated means  I  can  sleep  asea  when  I  can't  sleep 
ashore." 

"  But  Aunt  Mary?  "  cried  Jack  blankly. 


186    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"She's  all  right,"  said  Mitchell;  "she'll  soon 
reach  the  cold  burnt  toast  stage  and  when  she 
reaches  the  stage  we'll  all  welcome  her  into  any 
chorus.  Here's  to  choruses  in  general  and  one 
chorus  girl  in  particular.  I  haven't  met  her  yet, 
but  I  shall  know  her  when  I  do,  for  she  will  look 
at  me.  Up  to  now  they've  all  looked  elsewhere 
and  at  other  men.  If  my  fortune  was  only  in  my 
face  it  might  draw  some  interest,  but " 

"  Lady  Belle  "  careened  violently  and  Clover 
went  over  backwards  for  the  second  time  with 
much  in  his  wake. 

"  Oh,  I  say,"  said  Mitchell,  rising  in  disgust, 
"  if  you  want  everything  on  the  table  at  once  why 
take  it.  Only  I'm  going  on  deck.  After  you've 
bathed  in  the  gravy  you  can  have  it.  Ditto  the 
other  liquids.  Jack  and  I  are  going  up  to  dance 
a  hornpipe  and  sing  for  Burnett.  He  looked 
rather  ennuyed  to  me  when  we  came  down." 

Along  toward  eight  o'clock  that  night  "  Lady 
Belle "  anchored  somewhere  in  the  Sound  and 
tugged  vigorously  at  her  cables  all  night. 

With  the  dawn  she  headed  back  towards  New 
York. 

"  As  a  success  my  entertainment  has  been  a  fail- 
ure," said  Mitchell  to  Jack  as  they  walked  up  and 
down  the  deck  after  breakfast;  "  but  into  each  life 
some  rain  must  fall,  and  I  offer  myself  as  a  sacri- 


AUNT    MARY   ENTHRALLED         187 

ficial  background  to  Aunt  Mary's  glowing,  living 
pictures  of  New  York." 

"  I  wish  you  hadn't,  though,"  said  Jack;  "  she'll 
never  want  a  yacht  of  her  own  now.  And  how 
under  Scorpion  are  we  ever  going  to  land  her?  " 

"  In  a  sheet,  my  able-bodied  young  friend,  in  a 
sheet,"  said  Mitchell  clapping  him  on  the  back. 
"  Don't  you  know  the  *  Weigh  the  Baby '  game? 
It  may  double  her  up  a  bit,  but  the  redoubtable 
Janice  will  straighten  her  out  again.  Here's  to 
the  sheet,  be  it  a  wet  sheet,  a  main  sheet,  or  a  sheet 
with  your  Aunt  Mary  tied  up  in  it." 

Mitchell  was  as  good  as  his  word  and  they 
landed  Aunt  Mary  in  a  sheet.  The  very  harbor- 
tugs  stopped  puffing  and  stood  open-mouthed  to 
stare  at  the  performance,  but  it  was  an  unalloyed 
success,  and  Aunt  Mary  was  gotten  onto  dry  land 
at  last. 

"  I  don't  want  to  do  nothin'  for  a  day  or  two," 
she  said,  as  they  drove  to  the  house. 

Janice  had  the  bed  open,  and  a  hot-water  bottle 
down  where  Aunt  Mary's  feet  might  be  expected, 
and  all  sorts  of  comfort  ready  to  hand. 

"  I'm  so  glad  to  see  you  safe  back,"  she  said, 
almost  weeping. 

"  I  don't  believe  it's  broke,"  said  Aunt  Mary, 
"  but  you  might  look  and  see.  Oh,  Granite — I — " 
she  stopped  and  looked  an  unutterable  meaning. 


188    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  It  stormed,  didn't  it?  "  said  the  maid. 

"  Stormed!  "  said  Aunt  Mary.  "  I  guess  it  did 
storm.  I  guess  it  hurricaned.  I  know  it  did. 
I'm  sure  of  it." 

"  But  you're  safe  now,"  said  the  girl,  tucking 
her  up  as  snugly  as  if  she  had  been  an  infant  in 
arms. 

"  Yes,  I'm  safe  now,"  said  Aunt  Mary, 
"  but — "  she  looked  very  earnest —  "  but,  oh,  my ! 
Granite,  how  I  did  need  that  white  fuzzy  stuff  to 
drink  this  morning.  I  never  wanted  nothin'  so 
bad  in  all  my  life  afore." 

Janice  stood  by  the  bed,  her  face  full  of  regret 
that  Aunt  Mary  had  known  any  aching  void. 

Aunt  Mary  grew  yet  more  earnest. 

"  Granite,"  she  said,  "  you  mind  what  I  tell 
you.  That  ought  to  be  advertised.  I  sh'd  think 
you  could  patent  it.  Folks  ought  to  know  about 
it." 

Then  she  laid  herself  out  in  bed.  "  My 
heavens  alive ! "  she  sighed  sweetly,  "  there's 
nothin'  like  home.  Not  anywhere  —  not  no- 
where !  " 


Chapter  Sixteen 

A   REPOSEFUL   INTERVAL 

THE  next  date  upon  the  little  gold  and  ivory 
memorandum  card  which  hung  beside 
Aunt  Mary's  watch  was  that  set  for  Bur- 
nett's picnic,  but  its  dawning  found  both  host  and 
guest  too  much  attached  to  their  beds  to  desire  any 
fetes  champetre  just  then. 

Burnett  was  in  that  very  weak  state  which  fol- 
lows in  the  immediate  wake  of  only  too  many 
yachts, — and  Aunt  Mary  was  sleeping  one  of  her 
long  drawn  out  and  utterly  restorative  sleeps. 

Jack  went  in  and  looked  at  her. 

"  It  did  storm  awfully,"  he  said  to  Janice,  who 
was  sitting  by  the  window.  The  maid  just  smiled, 
nodded,  and  laid  her  finger  on  her  lip.  She  never 
encouraged  conversation  when  her  charge  was 
reposing. 

Jack  went  softly  out  and  turned  his  steps  toward 
the  room  of  the  other  wreck. 

:<  Well,  how  are  stocks  to-day?  "  he  asked  cheer- 
fully on  entering. 

Burnett  was  stretched  out  pillowless  and  looked 
black  under  his  hollow  eyes.  But  he  appeared  to 
be  on  the  road  to  recovery. 


190    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Jack,"  he  said  seriously,  "  what  in  thunder 
makes  me  always  so  ready  to  go  on  the  water? 
I  should  think  after  a  while  I'd  learn  a  thing  or 
two." 

Jack  leaned  his  elbows  on  the  high  carved  foot- 
board and  returned  his  friend's  look  with  one  of 
equal  seriousness. 

"  What  makes  all  of  us  do  lots  of  things?  "  he 
asked.  "  Why  don't  we  all  learn?  " 

Burnett  sighed. 

"  That's  a  fact;  why  don't  we?  "  he  said  weakly. 
And  then  he  shut  his  eyes  again  and  turned  his 
back  to  his  caller. 

Jack  went  down  to  lunch.  Clover  and  Mitchell 
were  playing  cards  in  the  library. 

"Well,  how  is  the  hospital?"  Clover  asked, 
looking  up  while  he  shuffled  the  pack. 

"  Never  mind  about  Burnett,"  said  Mitchell, 
"  but  do  relieve  my  mind  about  Aunt  Mary.  Is 
the  one  sheet  still  taking  effect,  or  has  she  begun  to 
rally  on  a  diet  of  two?  " 

44  She's  asleep,"  said  the  nephew. 

"  God  bless  her  slumber,"  declared  Clover 
piously.  "  I  very  much  approve  of  Aunt  Mary 
asleep.  When  our  dearly  beloved  aunt  sleeps  we 
know  we've  got  her  and  we  don't  have  to  yell. 
Shall  I  deal  for  three?" 

"  They  are  bringing  up  lunch,"  said  the  latest 


A  REPOSEFUL  INTERVAL  191 

arrival,  —  "no   time  to   begin  a  hand.      Better 
stack  guns  for  the  present." 

"  So  say  I,"  said  Mitchell,  "  with  me  everything 
goes  down  when  lunch  comes  up.  It's  quite  the 
reverse  with  Burnett,  isn't  it? "  He  laughed 
brutally  at  his  own  wit. 

"  To  think  how  enthusiastic  Burr  was,"  said 
Clover,  evening  the  cards  preparatory  to  slipping 
them  into  their  holder  on  the  side  of  the  table. 
"  He's  always  so  enthusiastic  and  he's  always  so 
sick.  In  his  place  I  should  feel  that,  if  a  buoyant 
nature  is  a  virtue,  I  didn't  get  much  reward." 

The  gong  sounded  just  then,  and  they  all  went 
down  to  lunch,  not  at  all  saddened  by  the  sight 
of  their  comrade's  empty  chair. 

"  Now,  what  are  we  going  to  do  next?  "  Clover 
demanded  as  they  finished  the  bouillon. 

"  Have  a  meat  course,  I  suppose,"  said  Mitchell. 

"  I  don't  mean  that;  I  mean,  what  are  we  going 
to  do  next  with  Aunt  Mary?  " 

"  She  hasn't  but  two  days  more,"  said  Jack  medi- 
tatively. "  Of  course — even  if  she  was  all  chip- 
per— this  storm  has  knocked  any  picnic  endways." 

"  I  am  not  an  ardent  upholder  of  picnics,  any- 
how," said  Mitchell.  "  They  require  a  constant 
sitting  down  on  the  ground  and  getting  up  from 
the  ground  to  which  I  find  our  respected  aunt  very 
far  from  being  equal.  Burnett  mentioned  that  we 


192    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

should  go  to  the  scene  on  a  coach.  That  also  did 
not  meet  my  approval.  Going  anywhere  on  a  coach 
requires  a  constant  getting  up  on  the  coach  and 
getting  down  from  the  coach  to  which  I  also  con- 
sider the  lady  unequal.  The  events  of  yesterday 
have  left  a  deep  impression  on  my  mind.  I " 

"  Go  on  and  carve,"  interrupted  Clover,  "  or 
else  shove  me  the  platter.  I'm  hungry." 

"  So'm  I,"  said  a  voice  at  the  door.  A  weak 
voice — but  one  that  showed  decision  in  its  tone. 

They  looked  up  and  saw  Burnett,  dressed  in  a 
pink  silk  negligee  with  flowing  sleeves. 

"  I'm  ravenous,"  he  exclaimed  explanatorily. 
"  I  haven't  had  anything  since  day  before  yester- 
day at  breakfast.  I  didn't  know  I  wanted  any- 
thing till  I  smelt  it, — then  I  dressed  and  came 
down." 

"  How  sweet  you  look,"  said  Clover.  "  The 
effect  of  your  pa  jama  cuffs  and  collar  where  one 
greedily  expects  curves  and  contour  is  lovely. 
Where  did  you  find  that  bath-robe?  " 

"  In  the  bureau  drawer,"  said  Burnett.  "  It 
appeared  to  have  been  hastily  shoved  in  there 
some  time.  I  would  have  thought  that  it  was  a 
woman's  something-or-other,  only  I  found  one  of 
Jack's  cards  in  the  pocket." 

They  all  began  to  laugh — Clover  and  Mitchell 
more  heartily  than  the  owner  of  the  card. 


A   REPOSEFUL   INTERVAL  193 

"  Sit  down,"  said  Mitchell  finally  with  great 
cordiality.  "  You  may  as  well  sit  down  while  they 
mess  you  up  some  weak  tea  and  wet  toast." 

"  Tea  and  toast?  "  cried  the  one  in  pink.  "  I'm 
good  for  dinner.  Um  Gotteswillen,  what  do  you 
suppose  I  came  down  for?" 

"  I  wasn't  sure,"  said  his  friend  mildly;  "you 
must  admit  yourself  that  your  attire  is  misleading. 
My  book  on  social  etiquette  says  nothing  as  to 
when  it  is  correct  to  wear  a  pink  silk  robe  over  blue 
and  white  striped  pajamas.  However,  there's  no 
denying  your  presence,  and  what  can't  be  denied 
must  be  supplied,  so  what  will  you  have?  " 

"  Everything." 

Mitchell  dived  into  the  edibles  generally  and 
Burnett's  void  was  provided  with  fulfillment. 

"  We  were  talking  about  Aunt  Mary,"  Clover 
said  presently.  "  We  were  saying  that  neither  you 
nor  she  would  be  up  to  a  coach  or  down  to  a  picnic 
for  one  while." 

"  Oh,  I  don't  know,"  said  Burnett.  "  I  feel  up 
to  pretty  nearly  anything  now  that  I  can  eat  again. 
Pass  over  the  horseradish,  will  you?  " 

"  You're  one  thing,  my  sweet  pink  friend,"  said 
Clover  gently,  "  but  Aunt  Mary's  another.  I'm 
not  saying  that  New  York  has  not  had  a  wonder- 
fully Brown-Sequardesque  effect  on  her,  but  I  am 
saying  that  if  she  is  to  be  raised  and  lowered 


194    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 
frequently,    I   want   to   travel   with    a   portable 


crane." 


"  Hum,  hum,  hum!  "  cried  Jack.  "  May  I  just 
ask  who  did  most  of  the  heavy  labor  of  Aunt  Mary 
yesterday  ?  — As  the  man  in  the  opera  sings  twenty 
times  with  the  whole  chorus  to  back  him — ' 'Twas 
I,  'twas  I,  'twas  I,  'twas  I 

"  Hand  over  the  toast,  Clover,"  said  Burnett. 
"  I  don't  care  who  it  was — it  was  a  success  any- 
how, for  she's  upstairs  and  still  alive,  and  I  say 

she'd  enjoy  coaching  out  Riverside  way,  and " 

he  choked. 

"  Slap  him  anywhere,"  said  Mitchell.  "  On  his 
mouth  would  be  the  proper  place.  Such  poor 
manners, — coming  down  to  a  company  lunch  in 
another  man's  bath-robe  and  then  trying  to  preach 
and  eat  dry  toast  at  once." 

Burnett  gasped  and  recovered. 

"  There,"  said  Clover,  who  had  risen  to  admin- 
ister the  proposed  slap,  "  he's  off  our  minds  and 
we  may  again  pick  up  Aunt  Mary  and  put  her 
back  on." 

"  We  want  to  send  her  home  in  a  blaze  of 
glory,"  said  Jack  thoughtfully.  "  I  want  her  to 
feel  that  the  fun  ran  straight  through." 

"  That's  just  what  I  mean,"  interposed  his  par- 
ticular friend ;  "  we  want  her  to  go  home  on  the 
wings  of  a  giant  cracker,  so  to  speak." 


A   REPOSEFUL   INTERVAL  195 

"  How  would  it  do,"  said  Clover  suddenly,  "  to 
just  make  a  night  of  it  and  take  her  along  ?  Stock 
up,  stack  up,  and  ho!  for  it.  You  all  know  the 
kind  of  a  time  I  mean." 

"  Clover,"  said  Jack  gravely,  "  does  it  occur  to 
you  that  Aunt  Mary  belongs  to  me  and  that  I 
have  a  personal  interest  in  keeping  her  alive?  " 

"  Nothing  ever  occurs  to  him,"  said  Mitchell. 
"  Occasionally  an  idea  bangs  up  against  him  inad- 
vertently, and  as  it  splinters  a  sliver  or  two  pene- 
trate his  head — that's  all." 

"  I  don't  see  why  the  last  sliver  he  felt  wasn't 
to  the  point,"  said  Burnett,  turning  the  cream  jug 
upside  down  as  he  spoke.  "  I  think  she'd  enjoy  it 
of  all  things.  She  enjoys  everything  so.  I'll  guar- 
antee that  when  she  gets  back  home  she'll  even 
enjoy  the  yachting  trip.  Lots  of  people  are  made 
like  that.  In  the  winter  I  always  enjoy  yachting, 
myself.  Pass  me  the  hot  bread." 

"  Burnett,"  said  Mitchell  warmly,  "  I  wish  that 
you  would  remember  that  a  collapse  invariably 
follows  an  inflated  market." 

"  Is  it  Aunt  Mary  who  is  on  the  market,  or 
myself?" 

"  You." 

"  Oh,  the  rule  is  reversed  in  my  case — the  col- 
lapse went  first.  I'm  only  inflating  up  to  the  usual 
limit  again.  Is  there  any  gravy  left?  " 


196    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  No,  there  isn't,"  said  Clover,  looking  in  the 
dish,  "  there  isn't  much  of  anything  left." 

"  Let's  go  to  the  library,"  said  Mitchell,  rising 
abruptly.  "  It  always  makes  me  ill  to  see  goose- 
stuffing  before  Thanksgiving.  Come  on." 

"  I'm  done,"  said  Burnett,  springing  up  and 
winding  his  lacey  draperies  about  his  manly  form. 
"  Come  on  yourself;  and  once  settled  and  smok- 
ing, let  us  canvass  the  question  and  agree  with 
Clover." 

"  You  know  there  are  nights  about  town  and 
nights  about  town,"  said  Clover,  as  they  climbed 
the  staircase.  "  I  do  not  anticipate  that  Aunt 
Mary  will  bring  up  with  a  round  turn  in  the  police 
station,  as  her  young  relative  once  did." 

"Well,  that's  some  comfort,"  said  Mitchell. 
"  I  did  not  feel  sure  as  to  just  where  you  did  mean 
her  to  bring  up.  You  will  perhaps  allow  me  to 
remark  that  making  a  night  of  it  with  Aunt  Mary 
in  tow  is  a  subject  that  really  is  provocative  of 
mature  reflection.  Making  a  night  of  it  is  a  frothy 
sort  of  a  proposition  in  which  our  beloved  aunty 
may  not  beat  up  to  quite  the  buoyancy  of  you 
and  me." 

As  he  finished  this  sage  remark  they  all  re- 
entered  the  library  and  grouped  themselves  around 
the  table  of  smoking  things. 

"  That's  what  I  say,"  said  Jack.    "  I  think  she's 


A   REPOSEFUL   INTERVAL  197 

much  more  likely  to  beat  out  than  to  beat  up — I 
must  say." 

"  I'll  bet  you  she  doesn't,"  cried  Burnett 
eagerly.  "  I'll  bet  five  dollars  that  she  doesn't." 

"  I  declare,"  said  Clover,  "  what  a  thing  a 
backer  is  to  be  sure.  I  feel  positive  that  Aunt 
Mary  will  go  through  with  it  now.  I  had  my 
doubts  before,  but  never  now.  Six  to  five  on  Aunt 
Mary  for  the  Three-year-old  Stakes." 

"  The  best  way  is  to  hit  a  happy  medium,"  said 
Mitchell  thoughtfully,  scratching  a  match  for  the 
lighting  of  his  new-rolled  cigarette.  "  I  think  the 
wisest  thing  would  be  for  us  just  to  take  Aunt 
Mary  and  sally  forth  and  then  keep  it  up  until  she 
must  be  put  to  bed.  What  say?" 

"  Well,"  said  Jack,  reflectively,  "  I  don't  sup- 
pose that  taking  it  that  way,  it  would  really  be  any 
worse  than  the  other  nights " 

"Worse!  "  cried  Clover.  "Hear  him! — slan- 
dering those  brilliant  occasions,  everyone  of  which 
is  a  jewel  in  the  crown  of  Aunt  Mary's  bonnet." 

"  We'll  begin  by  dining  out,"  said  Burnett. 
"  I'll  give  the  dinner.  One  of  the  souvenir  kind  of 
affairs.  A  white  mouse  for  every  man  and  a  canary 
bird  for  the  lady.  We'll  have  a  private  room  and 
speeches  and  I'll  get  megaphones  so  we  can  make 
her  hear  without  bustin'." 

"  My  dear  boy,"  said  Mitchell,  "  where  is  this 


private  room  to  be  in  which  the  party  can  converse 
through  megaphones?  I  had  two  deaf  uncles  once 
who  played  cribbage  with  megaphones,  but  they 
were  influential  and  the  rest  of  the  family  were 
poor.  Circumstances  alter  cases.  I  ask  again 
where  you  can  get  a  private  dining-room  for  the 
use  of  five  people  and  four  megaphones?  " 

"I'll  see,"  said  Burnett;  "I  wish,"  he  added 
irritably,  "  that  you'd  wait  until  I  finished  before 
beginning  to  smash  in  like  that,  you  knock  every- 
thing out  of  my  head." 

"  It'll  do  you  good  to  have  a  little  something 
knocked  out  of  you,"  said  Mitchell  gently.  "  It 
may  enlarge  your  premises,  give  you  a  spare  room 
somewhere,  so  to  speak.  I  should  think  that  you'd 
need  some  spare  room  somewhere  after  such  a 
breakfast." 

"  I'll  tell  you  what  I  think;"  said  Clover.  "  I 
think  it's  a  great  scheme.  It's  a  sort  of  pull-in- 
and-out,  field-glass  species  of  idea.  We  can  de- 
velop it  or  we  can  shut  it  off;  in  other  words,  we 
can  parade  Aunt  Mary  or  bring  her  home  just 
when  we  darn  please." 

"  That's  what  I  said,"  said  Burnett.  "  Begin 
with  my  dinner,  white  mice  and  all,  and  when  all 
is  going  just  let  it  slide  until  it  seems  about  time 
to  slide  off." 

"  Yes,"  said  Mitchell  dryly,  "  it's  always  a  good 


A   REPOSEFUL   INTERVAL  199 

plan  to  slide  on  until  you  slide  off.  It  would  be  so 
easy  to  reverse  the  game." 

"  And  then,  too, "  began  Burnett, 

"  Excuse  me,"  said  a  voice  at  the  door, — a 
woman's  voice  this  time 

It  was  Janice,  very  pretty  in  her  black  dress  and 
white  decorations,  hands  in  pockets,  smile  on  lips. 

"  What's  up  now?  "  the  last  speaker  interrupted 
himself  to  ask,  "  Aunt  Mary?  " 

"  No,  she's  not  up,"  said  the  maid;  "  but  she's 
awake  and  wants  to  know  about  the  picnic." 

"There,  what  did  I  sayl"  cried  Burnett; 
"  isn't  she  a  hero?  I  tell  you  Aunt  Mary'd  fight 
in  the  last  ditch — she'd  never  surrender!  She's 
one  of  those  dead-at-the-gun  chaps.  I'm  proud  to 
think  we  have  known  the  companionship  of  joint 
yachting  results." 

"  She  says  she  feels  as  well  as  ever,"  said  Janice, 
opening  her  eyes  a  trifle  as  she  noted  Burnett's  pink 
silk  negligee,  "  and  wishes  to  know  when  you  want 
to  start." 

"  Bravo,"  said  Mitchell;  "  I,  too,  am  fired  by 
this  exposition  of  pluck.  I  like  spirit.  She  reminds 
me  of  the  horse  who  was  turned  out  to  grass  and 
then  suddenly  broke  the  world's  record." 

"  What  horse  was  that?  "  asked  Burnett. 

"  Pegasus,"  said  Mitchell  cruelly;  "  I  didn't 
say  what  kind  of  a  record  he  broke,  did  I?  " 


200    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  What  shall  I  tell  Miss  Watkins?  "  asked  the 
maid. 

Jack,  who  had  risen  at  her  entrance  and  gone  to 
the  window,  faced  around  here  and  said : 

"  Tell  her  that  if  she'll  dress  we'll  go  out 
bonnet-shooting  and  afterwards  drive  in  the 
park." 

Janice  hesitated. 

"  She  will  surely  ask  where  you  are  to  dine," 
said  she,  half-smiling. 

Jack  looked  at  the  crowd. 

"  Fellows,"  he  said,  "  we  must  save  up  for  to- 
morrow's blow-out;  suppose  you  let  Mitchell  and 
me  dine  Aunt  Mary  somewhere  very  tranquilly  to- 
night and  we'll  get  her  home  by  eleven." 

"  Yes,  do,"  said  Janice,  with  sudden  earnest 
entreaty.  "  Honestly,  there  is  a  limit." 

"  Of  course,  there  is  a  limit,"  said  Mitchell. 
"  Even  cities  have  their  limits.  This  one  tried  to 
be  an  exception,  but  San  Francisco  yelled  *  Keep 
off  '  and  she  drew  in  her  claws  again.  Aunt  Mary, 
possessing  many  points  in  common  with  New  York, 
also  possesses  that.  She  has  limits.  Her  limits 
took  in  more  than  we  bargained  for, — for  they 
have  taken  us  into  the  bargain.  Still  they  are  there, 
and  we  bow  to  necessity.  A  cheerful  drive,  a 
quiet  tea,  early  to  bed.  And  pax  vobiscum" 

"No  wonder,"  said  Burnett,  "  it's  easy  for  you 


A   REPOSEFUL   INTERVAL  201 

to  agree  when  you're  to  be  one  of  the  dinner  party." 
"  I  don't  mind  being  left  out,"  said  Clover  con- 
tentedly. "  I  shall  sit  on  the  sofa  and  whisper  to 
*  the  one  behind.'  Whispering  is  an  art  that  I  have 
almost  forgotten,  but  inspired  by  that  pink " 

"  Then  I'll  tell  Miss  Watkins  to  dress  for  the 
going  out,"  said  Janice,  pointedly  addressing  her- 
self to  Jack. 

"  Yes,  please  do." 

The  maid  left  the  room  and  went  upstairs. 
Aunt  Mary  was  tossing  about  on  her  pillow. 

"  Well,  what's  it  to  be?  "  she  asked  instantly. 

"  The  storm  has  made  it  too  wet  to  picnic,"  re- 
plied Janice.  "  Mr.  Denham  wants  to  take  you  to 
drive  and  afterwards  you  and  Mr.  Mitchell  and  he 
are  to  dine " 

"  And  Burnett  and  Clover?  "  cried  Aunt  Mary 
in  appalled  interruption ;  "  where  are  they  goin'  ?  " 

"  Really,  I  don't  know." 

"  I  don't  like  the  idea,"  said  Aunt  Mary; 
"  we'd  ought  to  all  be  together.  I  never  did  ap- 
prove of  splittin'  up  in  small  parties.  Did  Jack 
say  anythin'  about  my  gettin'  another  bonnet?  " 

"  Yes,  he  thought  that  you  would  go  to  a  mil- 
liner first." 

"  I  don't  know  about  lookin'  sillier,"  said  Aunt 
Mary.  "  Strikes  me  a  woman  can't  look  more 
foolish  than  she  does  without  a  bonnet.  How- 


202    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT  MARY 

ever,  I  don't  feel  like  makin'  a  fuss  over  anythin' 
to-day.  I've  had  a  good  rest  and  I  feel  fine.  I'll 
dress  and  go  out  with  Jack,  an'  I  know  one  thing, 
I'll  enjoy  every  minute  I  can,  for  this  week  is  goin' 
like  lightnin'  and  when  it's  over — well,  you  never 
saw  Lucinda,  so  it's  no  use  tryin'  to  make  you 

understand,  but "  she  drew  a  long  breath  and 

shook  her  head  meaningly. 

Janice  did  not  reply.  She  busied  herself  with 
the  cares  of  the  toilet  of  her  mistress,  and  when  that 
was  complete  the  carriage  was  summoned  for  the 
shopping  tour. 

Jack  saw  that  the  bonnet  was  attended  to  first 
of  all  and  then  they  went  to  another  store  and 
purchased  a  scarf  pin  for  Joshua  and  a  workbox 
for  Lucinda.  After  that  Aunt  Mary  decided  that 
she  wanted  her  four  friends  each  to  have  a  souvenir 
of  her  visit,  so  she  insisted  upon  being  conducted  to 
that  gorgeous  establishment  which  is  lighted  with 
diamonds  instead  of  electricity  and  ordered  four 
dressing-cases  to  be  constructed,  everything  with 
gold  tops,  to  be  engraved  with  the  proper  initials 
and  also  the  inscription,"  from  M.  W.  in  memory 
of  N.  Y."  Jack  rather  protested  at  this,  asking 
her  if  she  realized  what  the  engraving  would 
come  to. 

"  I  don't  know,"  said  Aunt  Mary  recklessly 
and  lavishly.  "I  don't  care  what  it  comes  to  either. 


A   REPOSEFUL   INTERVAL  203 

It's  comin'  to  me,  anyhow,  ain't  it  ?  I  rather  think 
so.  Seems  likely." 

The  clerk  took  down  the  order,  and  then  as  he 
was  ushering  them  door-wards  he  fell  by  the  way- 
side and  craved  permission  to  show  some  tiaras  of 
emeralds  and  some  pearl  dog-collars.  Jack 
rebelled. 

"  You  don't  want  any  of  those,"  he  exclaimed, 
trying  to  propel  her  by. 

"  I  ain't  so  sure,"  said  Aunt  Mary.  "  I  might 
have  a  dog  some  day." 

But  her  nephew  got  her  back  into  their  convey- 
ance, and  they  drove  away.  It  was  so  late  that 
they  could  not  consider  the  park  and  so  had  to 
make  a  tour  of  Fifth  Avenue  to  use  up  the  time 
left  before  dinner.  Then  when  they  headed 
toward  the  cafe  they  were  delighted  to  observe 
Mitchell  awaiting  them  just  where  he  was  to  have 
been. 

"  I  see  him,"  said  Aunt  Mary.  "  My !  I'd  know 
him  as  far  off  as  I'd  know  anybody."  But  then  she 
sighed.  "  I  wish  the  others  were  there,  too,"  she 
said  sadly;  "  seems  awful — just  three  of  us." 

The  dinner  which  followed  echoed  her  senti- 
ment. It  was  a  very  nice  dinner,  but  painfully 
quiet,  and  Aunt  Mary  grew  very  restless. 

"  Seems  like  wastin'  time,  anyhow,"  she  said 
uneasily.  "  I  don't  see  why  the  others  didn't  come. 


204    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Well,  can't  we  go  to  Coney  Island  or  the  Statue 
of  Liberty  or  somewhere  when  we're  through?  " 

Mitchell  looked  at  Jack. 

"Why,  you  see,  Aunt  Mary,"  the  latter  promptly 
shrieked,  "  we  thought  we'd  be  good  and  go  home 
early  and  sort  of  rest  up  to-night  so  as  to  have 
a  high  old  time  to-morrow." 

Aunt  Mary's  face,  which  had  fallen  during  the 
first  part  of  their  speech,  brightened  up  at  the  last 
words. 

"  What  are  we  goin'  to  do?  "  she  inquired  with 
unfeigned  interest. 

"  Burnett's  going  to  give  us  a  dinner,"  Jack 
answered,  "  and  then  afterwards  we're  going  to 
help  you  see  the  town." 

"  Oh  1  "  said  Aunt  Mary.  A  pleasant  gleam 
fled  over  her  face. 

"  I  never  was  a  great  believer  in  bein'  out 
nights,"  she  said,  "  but  I  guess  I'll  make  an  excep- 
tion to-morrow.  I  might  as  well  be  doin'  that  as 
anythin',  I  presume.  Maybe  better — very  likely 
better." 

"  Oh,  very  much  better,"  said  Mitchell.  "  It  is 
the  exceptions  that  furnish  all  the  oil  in  life's 
machinery.  The  exceptions  not  only  generally 
prove  too  much  for  the  rule,  but  they  also  generally 
prevent  the  rule  from  proving  too  much  for  us. 
They " 


A   REPOSEFUL   INTERVAL  205 

"  But  I  don't  see  why  we  couldn't  go  to  two  or 
three  vaudevilles  to-night,  too,"  said  the  old  lady, 
suddenly.  "  I  feel  so  sort  of  ready-for-anythin'." 

"  You  always  feel  that  way,  Miss  Watkins," 
screamed  Mitchell.  "It  is  we  that  are  the  blind 
and  the  halt.  You  are  ever  fresh,  but  we  falter  and 
faint.  You  see  it's  you  that  go  out,  but  it's  we 
that  you  get  back.  You " 

"  We  could  go  to  one  vaudeville,  anyway,"  said 
Aunt  Mary  abstractedly;  "  an'  if  we  saw  any  places 
that  looked  lively  we  could  stop  a  few  minutes  there 
on  our  way  back.  I've  never  been  into  lots  of 
things  here." 

Jack  looked  at  Mitchell  this  time. 

"  I'm  sorry,  Miss  Watkins,"  he  roared,  "  but 
/'//  have  to  go  home,  anyhow.  You  see,  I'm  not 
used  to  the  lively  life  which  has  been  enlivening 
us  all  this  week  and,  being  weakly  in  my  knees, 
needs  must  look  out." 

Aunt  Mary  looked  very  disappointed. 

"  Then  Jack  and  I'll  go,  too,"  she  said,  "  but 
oh!  dear,  I  do  hate  to  waste  my  stay  in  the  city 
sleepin'  so  much.  I  can  sleep  all  I  want  after  I 

get  home,  but "  she  paused,  and  then  said 

with  deep  feeling,  "  Well,  you  don't  understand 
about  Lucinda  an'  so  you  don't  understand  about 
anythin'." 

Both  the  young  men  felt  truly  regretful  as  they 


206    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

put  her  into  the  carriage  for  the  return  trip.  Her 
deep  enjoyment  was  so  genuine  and  naive  that  they 
sympathized  with  her  feelings  when  cut  off  from  it. 
But  it  was  best  that  this  one  night  should  pass 
unimproved,  and  so  all  five  threw  themselves  into 
their  respective  beds  with  equal  zest  and  slept — 
and  slept — and  slept. 


Chapter  Seventeen 
AUNT  MARY'S  NIGHT  ABOUT  TOWN 

iHE  next  day  came  up  out  of  the  ocean 
fair  and  warm,  and  when  it  drew  toward 
later  afternoon  no  more  propitious  night 
for  setting  forth  ever  happened. 

It  was  undeniably  a  night  to  be  remembered. 
And  Aunt  Mary's  entertainers  drew  in  deep 
breaths  as  they  girded  themselves  for  the  conflict. 
They  certainly  intended  to  do  themselves  proud 
and  on  top  of  all  the  lesser  "  times  of  her  life  " 
to  pile  the  one  pre-eminent  which  should  rest  pre- 
eminent forever.  Aunt  Mary  had  been  gay  in  the 
first  part  of  the  week, — gayer  and  gayer  as  the 
week  progressed,  but  that  final  crowning  night  was 
indubitably  the  gayest  of  all.  If  you  doubt  this 
read  on — read  on — and  be  convinced. 

They  began  with  Burnett's  dinner  in  the  private 
room.  No  matter  where  the  private  room  was, 
for  it  really  wasn't  a  private  room  at  all — it  was  a 
suite  of  rooms  borrowed  and  arranged  especially 
for  that  one  occasion.  They  gathered  there  at 
eight  o'clock  and  began  with  oysters  served  on  a 
large  brass  tray  in  a  half-dim  Turkish  room  where 

207 


208    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

incense  sticks  burned  about  and  queer  daggers  held 
up  the  curtains.  The  oysters  were  served  on  their 
arrival  and  the  megaphones  stood  like  extinguish- 
ers over  each  with  the  name  cards  tied  to  the  small 
end.  The  effect  was  really  unique.  Aunt  Mary 
had  one,  too,  and  they  were  all  rejoiced  at  her  de- 
light in  the  scheme,  and  a  few  seconds  after  they 
were  doubly  rejoiced  over  its  success  for  no  one 
had  to  speak  loud — the  megaphones  did  it  all, 
producing  a  lovely  clamor  which  deafened  all  those 
who  could  hear  and  caused  Aunt  Mary  to  feel  that 
she  heard  with  the  rest. 

Amidst  the  cheerful  din  they  exchanged  such 
very  wild  remarks  as  oysters  always  inspire  and 
each  and  all  were  mutually  content  at  the  effect 
thereof.  Then  they  finished,  and  Burnett  rose  at 
once,  flung  back  the  portieres,  and  led  them  in 
upon  their  soup  which  stood  smoking  on  a  large 
card  table  in  the  next  room.  There  were  bouton- 
nieres  with  the  soup,  and  violets  for  Aunt  Mary, 
and  again  they  used  the  megaphones  and  again  the 
conversation  partook  of  the  customary  conversa- 
tion which  soup  produces. 

The  soup  finished,  Burnett  jumped  up  again  and 
threw  back  other  portieres  and  they  all  moved  out 
into  a  dining-room,  with  its  table  spread  with  a 
substantial  dinner.  This  time  it  was  the  real  thing. 
Candelabra,  ice-pails,  etc. 


Aunt  Mary  had  a  parrot  in  a  gilt  tower,  and  all 
the  men  had  white  mice  in  houses  shaped  like  hat- 
boxes.  Mitchell's  seat  was  flanked  with  wine  cool- 
ers, and  Burnett's,  too.  There  was  all  that  they 
could  desire  to  eat  and  drink  and  more.  The 
feast  began,  and  it  was  grand  and  glorious. 

"  I'll  tell  you  what,"  said  Aunt  Mary,  in  the 
midst  of  the  revel,  "  if  this  is  what  it  means  in 
papers  when  it  speaks  of  high  livin',  I  don't  blame 
'em  for  bein'  willin'  to  die  of  it  young.  One  week 
like  this  is  worth  ten  years  with  Lucinda.  Twenty. 
A  whole  life." 

"  Say,  Jack,"  said  Burnett  in  an  undertone, 
"  let's  have  Lucinda  come  to  town  next  and  see  the 
effect  on  her." 

"  Miss  Watkins,"  said  Clover  through  his 
megaphone,  "  as  a  mark  of  my  affection  I  beg  to 
offer  you  my  white  mouse.  Do  you  accept?  " 

"  Oh,  I  don't  want  to  go  back  to  the  house  yet," 
said  Aunt  Mary,  much  disturbed.  "  It's  too  soon." 

"  We  won't  go  home  till  morning,"  said  Burnett. 
"  Not  by  a  long  shot.  Here,  Mitchell,  give  us  a 
speech.  Home !  we  don't  want  to  drink  to  it,  but 
we  do  want  to  drink  to  it  here." 

"  Home !  "  said  Mitchell,  rising  with  his  glass  in 
his  hand.  "  Home!  here's  to  home,  and  I'll  drink 
to  it  in  anything  but  a  cab.  Home,  Aunt  Mary 
and  gentlemen,  is  the  place  where  one  may  go 


210    REJUVENATION   OF  AUNT  MARY 

when  every  other  place  is  closed.  As  long  as  any 
other  place  is  open,  however,  I  do  not  recommend 
going  home.  The  contrast  is  always  sharp  and 
bitter  and  to  be  avoided  until  unavoidable  circum- 
stances, over  which  we  possess  but  little  control, 
force  us  to  give  our  address  to  the  man  who  drives 
and  let  him  drive  us  to  the  last  place  on  the  map. 
And  so  I  drink  to  that  last  place — home ;  and  here's 
to  it,  not  now,  but  a  good  deal  later,  and  not  then 
unless  what  must  be  has  got  to  result." 

Mitchell  paused  and  they  all  drank. 

"  Me  next  now,"  exclaimed  Burnett,  jumping  to 
his  feet.  "  I'm  going  to  make  a  speech  at  my  own 
dinner,  and  as  a  good  speech  is  best  made  off-hand, 
I've  picked  out  an  off-hand  subject  and  arise  to  give 
you  *  Lucinda.'  Having  never  met  her  I  feel  able 
to  say  nothing  good  about  her  and  I  call  the  com- 
pany present  to  witness  that  I  shall  say  nothing 
bad  either.  I  gather  from  what  I  have  had  a  stray 
chance  of  picking  up  that  Lucinda  is  all  that  she 
should  be,  and  nothing  frisque.  The  latter  qual- 
ity is  too  bad,  but  it's  not  my  fault.  Therefore, 
I  say  again  *  Lucinda ',  and  here's  to  her  very  good 
health.  May  she  never  regret  that  Fate  has  given 
her  no  chance  to  have  anything  to  regret." 

Aunt  Mary  applauded  this  speech  heartily  even 
if  she  hadn't  quite  caught  the  whole  of  it  and  had 
no  idea  of  whom  it  was  about. 


AUNT   MARY'S   NIGHT   ABOUT   TOWN 

"Who's  goin'  to  speak  now?"  she  asked 
anxiously. 

"  I  am,"  said  Clover  modestly.  "  I  rise  to 
propose  the  health  of  our  honored  guest,  Miss 
Watkins.  We  all  know  what  kin  she  is  to  one  of 
us,  and  we  all  weep  that  she  didn't  do  as  well  by  the 
rest  of  us.  Aunt  Mary !  Glasses  down !  " 

"  You  can't  drink  this,  you  know,  Aunt  Mary," 
said  Jack,  —  "it's  bad  taste  to  drink  to  your- 
self." 

"  I  don't  want  to  drink,"  said  Aunt  Mary, 
beaming, — "  I  like  to  watch  you." 

"  Here's  to  Aunt  Mary's  liking  to  watch  us !  " 
cried  Clover. 

"  No,"  said  Burnett  rising,  "  don't.  It's  time 
to  go  and  get  the  salad  now." 

"  We'd  ought  to  have  the  automobile  for  this 
party,"  said  Aunt  Mary,  and  everyone  applauded 
her  idea,  as  they  rose  and  gathered  up  their  be- 
longings. 

It  was  a  droll  procession  of  men  with  mice  and 
a  lady  with  a  parrot  that  got  under  way  and  moved 
in  among  the  Japanese  fans  and  swinging  lanterns 
of  the  next  room  in  the  suite  of  Burnett's  friend. 
Five  little  individual  tables  were  laid  there  and  on 
each  table  lay  a  Japanese  creature  of  some  sort 
which — being  opened  somewhere — revealed  salad 
within. 


REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"Well,  I  never  did!"  exclaimed  the  guest; 
"  this  dinner  ought  to  be  put  in  a  book !  " 

"  We'll  put  it  in  ourselves  first,"  said  Mitchell. 
"  I  never  believe  in  booking  any  attraction  until  it 
has  been  tried  on  a  select  few.  Burnett  having 
selected  me  for  one  of  this  few,  I  vote  we  begin  on 
the  salad." 

They  began  forthwith. 

Aunt  Mary  suddenly  stopped  eating. 

"  Some  one  called,"  she  said. 

"  It's  the  parrot,"  said  Jack;  "  I  heard  him 
before." 

"What  does  he  say?"  said  Mitchell. 

"  Listen  and  you'll  find  out,"  said  Jack. 

They  all  listened  and  presently  the  parrot  said 
solemnly : 

"  Now  see  what  you've  done !  "  and  relapsed 
into  silence. 

"  What  does  he  mean?  "  Aunt  Mary  asked. 

"  He's  referring  to  his  own  affairs,"  said  Bur- 
nett; "  come  on — let's  get  coffee  now!  " 

They  all  adjourned  to  a  tiny  room  lined  with 
posters  and  decorated  with  pipe  racks,  and  there 
had  ice  cream  in  the  form  of  bulls  and  bears, 
and  coffee  of  the  strongest  variety.  And  then  cor- 
dials and  cigarettes. 

"  Now,  where  shall  we  go  to  first  ?  "  asked  Bur- 
nett when  all  were  well  lit  up.  No  one  would 


AUNT   MARY'S    NIGHT   ABOUT   TOWN 

have  guessed  that  he  had  ever  felt  used  up  in 
all  his  life  before. 

"  To  a  roof  garden,"  said  Mitchell.  "  We'll 
go  to  a  roof  garden  first,  and  then  we'll  go  to  more 
roof  gardens,  and  after  that  if  the  spirit  moves 
we'll  go  to  yet  a  few  roof  gardens  in  addition. 
We'll  show  our  dear  aunt  what  wonders  can  be 
done  with  roofs,  and  to-morrow  she'll  wonder  what 
was  done  with  her." 

"  That's  the  bill,"  said  Clover,  "  and  let's  go 
now.  I  can  see  from  the  general  manner  of  my 
mouse  that  he's  dying  to  get  out  and  make  his  way 
in  the  wide  world." 

"  Mine  the  same,"  said  Mitchell;  "  by  George, 
it  worries  me  to  see  such  restless,  feverish  man- 
ners in  what  I  had  supposed  would  be  a  quiet 
domestic  companion.  It  presages  a  distracted  ex- 
istence. But  come  on." 

They  all  rose. 

"  Where  are  we  goin'  now?  "  asked  Aunt  Mary. 

;t  To  a  roof  garden,"  said  Jack,  "  and  we're 
going  to  take  the  whole  menagerie,  Aunt  Mary. 
We're  going  to  get  put  in  the  papers.  That's  the 
great  stunt, — to  get  put  in  the  papers." 

"  But  we'll  leave  the  megaphones,"  said  Mitch- 
ell. "  I  won't  go  about  with  a  mouse  and  a 
megaphone.  People  might  think  I  looked  silly. 
People  are  so  queer." 


REJUVENATION   OF  AUNT   MARY 

"  Put  the  mouse  in  the  megaphone,"  suggested 
Burnett.  "  That's  the  way  my  mother  taught  me 
to  pack  when  I  was  a  kid.  You  put  your  tooth 
brush  in  a  shoe,  and  the  shoe  in  a  sleeve  and  then 
turn  the  sleeve  inside  out.  Oh,  I  tell  you — what  is 
home  without  a  mother? — Put  the  mouse  in  the 
megaphone  and  stop  up  both  ends.  What  are  your 
hands  and  your  mouth  for?  " 

"  Yes,"  said  Mitchell,  "  I  think  I  see  myself  so 
handling  a  megaphone  that  the  mouse  doesn't  run 
out  either  end  or  into  my  mouth.  My  mouth  is  a 
good  mouth  and  it's  served  me  well  and  I  won't 
turn  it  over  to  a  mouse  at  this  late  day. 

"  Let's  keep  the  mice  in  their  cages,"  said 
Clover,  and  as  he  spoke  he  dropped  his. 

"  Now  see  what  you've  done !  "  said  the  parrot. 

"  I  didn't  hurt  it,"  said  Clover.     "  Come  on 


now." 


"  Yes,  come  on,"  said  Burnett.  "  It's  long  after 
ten  o'clock.  You  want  to  remember  that  even  roof 
gardens  are  not  eternally  on  tap." 

"  Well,  I'm  trying  to  hurry  all  I  can,"  said 
Mitchell.  "  I'm  the  picture  of  patience  scurrying 
for  dear  life  only  unable  to  lay  hands  on  her 
gloves." 

"  I  don't  catch  what's  the  trouble,"  said  Aunt 
Mary  to  Jack. 

"  Nothing's  the  trouble,"   said  Jack,   "  every- 


thing's  fine  and  dandy.  We're  going  out  now. 
Time  of  your  life,  Aunt  Mary,  time  of  your 
life!" 

They  telephoned  for  a  carriage  and  all  got  in. 
Then  Clover  slammed  the  door. 

"  Now  see  what  you've  done !  "  said  the  parrot. 

"Is  he  going  to  keep  saying  that?"  Burnett 
asked. 

"  I  don't  know,"  said  Jack.  "  It  comes  in  pretty 
pat,  don't  it?" 

"  Makes  me  think  of  my  mother,"  said  Clover. 
"  I  wish  it  wouldn't." 

"  I  don't  catch  who's  sayin'  what,"  said  Aunt 
Mary. 

"  Nobody's  saying  anything,  Miss  Watkins," 
roared  Mitchell;  "  we  are  all  talking  airy  nothings 
just  to  pass  the  time  o'  day." 

The  carriage  stopped  three  hundred  feet  below 
the  level  of  a  roof  garden. 

"  We  get  out  here,"  said  Burnett. 

They  all  got  out  and  went  up  in  an  elevator. 

"  Seems  to  be  a  good  many  goin'  to  the  same 
place,"  said  Aunt  Mary. 

"  Yes,"  said  Mitchell,  "  a  good  many  people 
generally  go  to  places  that  are  great  places  for  a 
good  many  people  to  go  to." 

"  You  ought  not  to  end  with  a  preposition," 
said  Clover. 


216    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  There,  I  left  my  ear-trumpet  in  the  carnage  1  " 
said  Aunt  Mary. 

There  was  a  pause  of  consternation.  No  one 
spoke  except  the  parrot. 

;'  We  know  what  she's  done  without  your  tell- 
ing us,"  said  Clover,  addressing  the  bird.  "  The 
question  is  what  to  do  next?  " 

Jack  went  back  downstairs  and  found  the  car- 
riage waiting  in  hopes  of  picking  up  another 
load.  He  lost  no  time  in  personally  picking  up  the 
ear-trumpet  and  returning  to  his  friends. 

Then  they  all  proceeded  above  and  bought  a 
table  and  turned  their  chairs  to  the  stage,  where 
the  attraction  just  at  that  moment  was  a  quar- 
tette of  pretty  girls. 

"  I'll  tell  you  what  we'll  do,"  said  Burnett  the 
instant  the  girls  began  to  sing.  "  Let's  each  tie 
a  card  to  a  mouse  and  present  them  to  the  girls !  " 

The  suggestion  found  favor  and  was  followed 
out  to  the  letter.  But  when  the  girls  were  through 
and  the  Chinaman  who  followed  them  on  the  pro- 
gramme was  also  over,  the  pleasures  of  life  in  that 
spot  palled  upon  the  party. 

"  Oh,  come,"  said  Burnett,  "  let's  go  somewhere 
else.  Let's  go  out  in  the  air." 

His  suggestion  found  favor.  And  they  sallied 
forth  and  visited  another  roof  garden,  a  theater 
where  they  saw  the  last  quarter  of  the  fourth  act, 


AUNT   MARY'S   NIGHT   ABOUT   TOWN   217 

a  place  where  Aunt  Mary  was  given  a  gondola 
ride,  and  a  place  where  she  was  given  something 
in  the  shape  of  light  refreshments. 

Then,  becoming  thirsty,  they  ordered  a  few 
White  Horses  and  Red  Horses  and  the  Necks  of 
yet  other  horses,  but  Aunt  Mary  declined  the  horses 
of  all  colors  and  Mitchell  upheld  her. 

"  That's  right,"  he  said,  "I'm  a  great  believer 
in  knowing  when  you've  had  enough,  and  I'm  sure 
you've  all  had  so  much  too  much  that  I  know  that 
I  must  have  had  enough  and  that  she's  better 
off  with  none  at  all." 

"  I  reckon  you're  right,"  said  Clover.  "  I've 
had  enough,  surely.  I  can't  see  over  my  pile  of 
little  saucers,  and  when  I  can't  see  over  my  pile  of 
little  saucers  I'm  always  positive  that  I've  had 
enough." 

Jack  laughed  and  then  ceased  laughing  and  drew 
down  the  corners  of  his  mouth. 

"  Why  do  people  sit  on  chairs?  "  Clover  asked 
just  then.  "  Why  don't  everyone  sit  on  the 
floor?  You  never  feel  as  if  you  might  slip  off 
the  floor." 

"  Ah,"  said  Mitchell,  "  if  we  were  not  always 
trying  to  rise  above  Nature-we  should  all  be  sitting 
where  Nature  intended, — when  we  weren't  swing- 
ing by  our  tails  and  picking  cocoanuts." 

"  Come  on  and  let's  go  somewhere  else,"  said 


218    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Burnett.  "  Every  time  I  look  at  somebody  it's 
someone  else  and  that  makes  me  nervous." 

"  Now  see  what  you've  done !  "  said  the  parrot. 

"  Did  you  know  his  long  suit  when  you  bought 
him  ?  "  Clover  asked  Burnett. 

"No,"  said  Burnett;  "they  told  me  that  he 
didn't  use  slang  and  that  was  all." 

It  was  well  along  in  the  evening — or  night — 
and  a  brisk  discussion  arose  as  to  where  to  go  next. 

"  I'll  tell  you,"  said  Clover,  "  we'll  take  a  ride. 
Let  me  see  what  time  is  it? — 12.30.  Just  the 
time  for  a  drive.  We'll  take  three  cabs  and  sally 
forth  and  drive  up  and  down  and  back  and  forth 
in  the  cool  night  air." 

"And  jews-harps  !"  cried  Burnett.  "Oh,  I 
say,  there's  a  bully  idea !  We'll  go  to  a  drug 
store  and  buy  some  Jews-harps  and  play  on  them 
as  we  drive  along.  We'll  each  sing  our  own  tune, 
and  the  effect  will  be  so  novel.  Let's  do  it." 

"Jews-harps — "  said  Clover  thoughtfully, 
"jews-harps  for  three  cabs — that'll  make — let  me 
see — that'll  make "  he  hesitated. 

"  Oh,  the  driver  will  make  the  change,"  said 
Burnett  impatiently.  "  Come  on.  If  we're  go- 
ing to  have  the  cabs  and  jews-harps  it's  time  to 
get  out  and  take  the  stump  in  the  good  cause." 

"  Where's  my  ear-trumpet?"  said  Aunt  Mary, 
blankly, — "  it's  been  left  somewhere." 


AUNT   MARY'S   NIGHT   ABOUT   TOWN  219 

"No,  it  hasn't,"  said  Mitchell.  "It's  here! 
I'm  holding  it  for  you.  It's  much  easier  holding  it 
than  picking  it  up.  It  seems  so  slippery  to-night." 

"  I'm  not  going  out  to  get  the  cabs,"  said  Clover. 
"  I  thought  of  the  idea  and  someone  else  must 
work  it  out.  I'm  opposed  to  working  after  time 
and  I  call  time  at  midnight. 

Mitchell  rose  with  a  depressed  air. 

"  I'll  go,"  he  said.  "  I  feel  the  need  of  a  walk. 
When  I  feel  the  need  of  anything  I  always  take  it 
and  I've  needed  and  taken  so  freely  to-night  that 
I  need  to  take  a  walk  to " 

"  I  don't  think  it  funny  to  talk  that  way,"  said 
Burnett  a  little  heatedly.  "  If  you  want  to  get  the 
cabs  why  get  the  cabs.  I'm  going  to  get  them,  too, 
and  I  reckon  we  can  get  them  combined  just  as  easy 
as  alone." 

"  I  will  go  with  you,"  said  his  friend  solemnly. 
"  I  will  accompany  you  because  I  feel  the  need 

"     He  stopped  and  turned  his  hat  over  and 

over.  "  I  know  there's  a  hole  to  put  my  head 
into,"  he  declared,  "  but  I  can't  just  put  my  hand — 
I  mean  my  head — on  to — I  mean,  into — it." 

"  Do  you  expect  to  find  a  brass  hand  pointing  to 
it?  "  said  Burnett  testily.  "  Come  on!  " 

'  Three  cabs  and  five — or  was  it  six? — Jews- 
harps?  "  continued  Mitchell  dreamily.  "  It  must 
have  been  six,  five  for  we  five,  and  one  for  Lord 


220    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Chesterfield — but  where  is  Lord  Chesterfield?" 
he  asked  suddenly  with  a  disturbed  glance  around. 
**  I  hope  he  hasn't  deserted  and  gone  home." 

"  Come  on,  come  on !  "  said  Burnett.  "  There 
won't  be  a  sober  cab  left  if  we  don't  hurry  while 
everything  is  still  able  to  stand  up." 

This  reasoning  seemed  to  alarm  Mitchell  and 
he  went  out  with  him  at  once. 

"  My  head  feels  awfully,"  said  Clover  to  Jack. 
"  It  sort  of  grinds  and  grates — does  yours?  " 

Jack  stared  straight  ahead  and  made  no  reply. 

"  I'm  goin'  home  no  more  to  roam,"  said  Aunt 
Mary  slowly  and.  sadly, — "I'm  goin'  home  no 
more  to  roam,  no  more  to  sin  an'  sorrow.  I'm 
goin'  home  no  more  to  roam — I'm  goin'  home 
to-morrow.  O  hum  I  "  She  heaved  a  heavy  sigh. 

"  Now  see  what  you've  done  1  "  said  the  parrot 
with  emphasis. 

"  Never  mind,"  said  Clover  bitterly.  "  Better 
people  than  you  have  gone  home  before  now;  I 
used  to  do  it  myself  before  I  was  old  enough  to 
know  worse.  Will  you  excuse  me  if  I  say,  *  Damn 
this  buzzing  in  my  head?  ' 

"  I  know  how  you  feel,"  said  Aunt  Mary  sym- 
pathetically. "  Don't  you  want  me  to  ring  for  the 
porter  and  have  him  make  up  your  berth  right 
away?  " 

Clover  didn't  seem  to  hear.     His  eyes  were 


AUNT   MARY'S   NIGHT   ABOUT   TOWN 

roving  moodily  about  the  room;  they  looked 
almost  as  faded  as  his  mustache. 

"  Seems  to  me  they're  gone  a  long  time,"  said 
Jack  presently,  twisting  a  little  in  his  seat.  "  It 
never  takes  me  so  long  to  get  a  cab.  I  hold  up  my 
hand — the  man  stops — and  I  get  in — what's  the 
matter,  Aunt  Mary?  "  He  asked  the  question  in 
sudden  alarm  at  seeing  Aunt  Mary  bury  her  face 
hastily  in  her  handkerchief. 

"  What's  the  matter?  "  he  repeated  loudly. 

"  Don't  mind  me,"  said  Aunt  Mary  sobbing. 
"  It's  just  that  I  happened  to  just  think  of  Lu — 
Lu — Lucinda — and  somehow  I  don't  seem  to  have 
no  strength  to  bear  it." 

"  Split  the  handkerchief  between  us,"  said 
Clover.  "  I  want  to  cry,  too,  and  there's  no  time 
like  the  present  for  doing  what  you  want  to  do." 

"  Rot!  "  said  Jack,  "  look  here -" 

He  was  interrupted  by  the  return  of  the  embassy, 
Mitchell  bearing  the  jews-harps. 

"  What's  the  matter?  "  Burnett  asked. 

"  Nothing,"  said  Clover;  "  we  were  so  worried 
over  you,  that's  all."  Burnett  called  for  the  bill 
and  found  that  he  had  run  out  of  cash;  "  Or  maybe 
I've  had  my  pocket  picked,"  he  suggested.  "  I'm 
beginning  to  be  in  just  the  mood  in  which  I  always 
get  my  pocket  picked." 

Jack  produced  a  roll  of  bills  and  settled  for  the 


222    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

refreshments.  Then  they  all  started  down  stairs 
as  Aunt  Mary  wouldn't  risk  an  elevator  going 
down. 

"  It's  all  right  comin'  up,"  she  said,  "  but  if  it 
broke  when  you  were  going  down  where'd 
you  be?  " 

"  In  the  elevator,"  said  Clover.  "  I'd  never 
jump,  I  know  that." 

"  Oh,  I've  left  my  ear-trumpet,"  said  Aunt 
Mary. 

"  Let's  draw  lots  to  see  who  goes  back?  "  Bur- 
nett suggested. 

They  drew  and  the  lot  fell  to  Clover. 

"  I'm  not  going  back,"  he  said  coldly.  "  I 
haven't  got  the  energy.  Let  her  apply  the  meg- 
aphone." 

Jack  went  back. 

Then  they  all  got  into  the  street  and  into  the 
cabs.  Aunt  Mary  and  Jack  went  first,  Mitchell 
and  Burnett  second,  and  Clover  brought  up  the 
rear  alone. 

They  set  off  and  it  must  be  admitted  that  the 
effect  of  the  three  cabs  going  single  file  one  after 
another  with  their  five  occupants  giving  forth  a 
most  imperfect  version  of  his  or  her  favorite  tune, 
was  at  once  novel  and  awe-inspiring.  But  like  all 
sweet  things  upon  this  earth  the  concert  was  not  of 
long  endurance.  It  was  only  a  few  minutes  before 


AUNT   MARY'S   NIGHT   ABOUT   TOWN   223 

the  duos  ceased  utterly  to  duo  and  the  soloist  in  the 
rear  fell  sound  asleep.  For  several  blocks  there 
was  a  mournful  and  tell-tale  lack  of  harmony  upon 
the  air  and  then  the  three  young  men  seemed  to 
have  exhausted  their  mouths  and  all  lapsed  into  a 
more  or  less  conscious  state  of  quietude. 

Only  Aunt  Mary  was  indefatigable.  Like  Cleo- 
patra, age  seemed  to  have  no  power  to  stale  her 
infinite  variety,  and  leaning  back  in  her  own  corner 
she  continued  to  placidly  and  peacefully  intone  with 
disregard  for  time  and  tune  which  never  ruffled 
a  wrinkle.  She  hadn't  played  on  a  Jews-harp  in 
sixty  years,  and  being  deaf  she  was  pleasantly  aston- 
ished at  how  well  she  still  did  it.  Jack  leaned  in 
his  corner  with  folded  arms;  he  wars  deeply  con- 
scious of  wishing  that  it  was  the  next  day — any 
day — any  other  day — for  the  week  had  been  a 
wearing  one  and  he  could  not  but  be  mortally  glad 
that  it  was  so  nearly  over.  The  task  of  fitting 
the  plan  of  Aunt  Mary's  revelries  to  the  measure 
of  her  personal  capacity  had  been  a  very  hard  one 
and  his  soul  panted  for  relief  therefrom.  It  is 
one  thing  to  undertake  a  task  and  another  thing 
to  persevere  to  its  successful  completion.  Aunt 
Mary's  nephew  was  tired — very  tired. 

A  little  later  he  felt  a  weight  against  him;  he 
looked;  it  was  Aunt  Mary's  head, — she  was  obliv- 
ious there  on  his  bosom. 


He  heard  a  voice ;  it  was  the  parrot. 

"  Now  see  what  you've  done,"  it  said  in  sepul- 
chral tones. 

They  reached  the  house,  bore  the  honored  guest 
within,  and  delivered  her  to  Janice.. 

"  You  can  have  that  parrot,"  Jack  called  back 
to  the  cabman,  "  He's  guaranteed  against  slang." 

The  cabman  drove  away. 

Janice  received  them  with  a  look  which  might 
have  been  construed  in  many  ways,  but  they  were 
all  far  past  construing  and  the  look  fell  to  the 
ground  unheeded. 

And  again  Aunt  Mary  was  tucked  carefully  up 
to  dream  herself  rested  once  more. 


Chapter  Eighteen 

A  DEPARTURE  AND  A  RETURN 

THE  next  day  poor  Aunt  Mary  had  to 
undergo  the  ordeal  of  being  obliged  to 
turn  her  face  away  from  all  those  joys 
which  had  so  suddenly  and  brilliantly  altered  the 
hues  of  life  for  her.     It  pretty  nearly  used  her  up. 
She  took  her  reviving  decoction  with  tears  standing 
in  her  eyes, — and  sat  down  the  glass  with  a  burst- 
ing sigh.     "  My,  but  I  wish  I  knew  when  I'd  be 
taking  any  more  of  this?  "  she  said  to  Janice. 

"  Oh,  you'll  come  back  to  the  city  some  day," 
said  the  maid  hopefully. 

"Come  back!"  said  Aunt  Mary.  "Well,  I 
should  say  that  I  would  come  back!  Why — I — " 
she  stopped  suddenly,  "  never  mind,"  she  said 
after  a  minute,  "  only  you'll  see  that  I'll  come 
back.  Pretty  surely — pretty  positively." 

Janice  was  folding  her  dresses  into  the  small 
trunk.  Aunt  Mary  contemplated  the  green  plaid 
waist  with  an  air  of  mournful  reflection. 

"  I  believe  I'll  always  keep  that  w'aist  rolled 
away,"  she  murmured.  "  I  shall  like  to  shake  it 
out  once  in  a  while  to  remind  me  of  things." 

225 


226    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Hand  me  my  purse,"  she  said  to  the  maid  five 
minutes  afterwards.  "  Here's  twenty-five  dollars 
an'  I  want  you  to  take  it  and  get  anythin'  you 
like  with  it." 

"  But  that's  too  much,"  Janice  cried,  putting  her 
hands  behind  her  and  shaking  her  head. 

"Take  it,"  said  Aunt  Mary  imperiously; 
"  you're  well  worth  it." 

"  I  don't  like  to — truly,"  said  the  girl. 

"  Take  it,"  said  Aunt  Mary  sternly. 

So  Janice  took  it  and  thanked  her. 

The  train  went  about  4  p.  M.,  and  it  seemed 
wise  to  give  the  traveller  a  quiet  luncheon  in  her 
own  room  and  rally  her  escort  afterwards. 

When  she  had  eaten  and  drank  she  sighed  again 
and  thoughtfully  folded  her  napkin. 

"  I've  had  a  nice  time,"  she  said,  gazing  fixedly 
out  of  the  window.  "  I've  had  a  nice  time,  and  I 
guess  those  young  men  have  enjoyed  it,  too.  I 
rather  think  my  bein'  here  has  given  them  a  chance 
to  go  to  a  good  many  places  where  they'd  never 
have  thought  of  goin'  alone.  I'm  pretty  sure 
of  it." 

Janice  made  no  reply. 

"  But  it's  all  over  now,"  said  Aunt  Mary  with 
something  that  sounded  suspiciously  like  a  sob  in 
her  voice,  "  an'  I  haven't  got  only  just  one  conso- 
lation left  an'  that's "  again  she  paused. 


A   DEPARTURE    AND   A   RETURN     227 

Janice  carried  the  tray  away  and  the  next  min- 
ute they  all  burst  in  bearing  their  parting  gifts  in 
their  arms. 

The  gifts  were  an  indiscriminate  collection  of 
flowers,  candy,  magazines,  books,  etc. 

Aunt  Mary  opened  her  closet  door  and  showed 
the  four  dressing-cases.  Everyone  but  Jack  was 
mightily  surprised  and  everyone  was  mightily 
pleased.  The  room  looked  like  Christmas,  and  the 
faces,  too. 

"  I  shall  die  with  my  head  on  the  hair  brush," 
Clover  declared,  and  Mitchell  went  down  on  his 
knees  and  kissed  Aunt  Mary's  hand. 

"  You  must  all  come  an'  see  me  if  you  ever  go 
anywhere  near,"  said  the  old  lady.  "  Now 
promise." 

"  We  promise,"  they  yelled  in  unison,  and  then 
they  asked  in  beautiful  rhythm  "  What's  the  mat- 
ter with  Aunt  Mary?  "  and  yelled  the  answer 
"  She's  all  right!  "  with  a  fervor  that  nearly  blew 
out  the  window, 

"  I  declare,"  Aunt  Mary  exclaimed,  as  the 
echoes  settled  back  among  the  furniture,  "  when 

I  think  of  Lucinda  seems  as  if "she  paused; 

further  speech  was  for  the  nonce  impossible. 

'  The  carriages  are  ready,"  Janice  announced 
at  the  door,  and  from  then  until  they  reached  the 
train  all  was  confusion  and  bustle. 


228    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Only  the  train  whistle  could  drown  the  fare- 
wells which  they  poured  into  her  ear-trumpet,  and 
when  they  could  hover  in  her  drawing-room  no 
longer  they  stood  outside  the  window  as  long  as 
the  window  was  there  to  stand  outside  of.  And 
then  they  watched  it  until  it  was  out  of  sight,  and 
after  that  turned  solemnly  away. 

"  By  grab !  "  said  Burnett,  "  I  think  she  ought 
to  leave  us  all  fortunes.  I  never  was  so  com- 
pletely done  up  in  my  life." 

"  My  throat's  blistered,"  said  Clover  feebly; 
u  I'm  going  to  stand  on  my  head  and  gargle  with 
salve  until  my  throat's  healed." 

"  I  shall  never  shine  on  the  team  again,"  said 
Mitchell.  "  I  shall  hire  out  for  bleacher  work. 
He  who  has  successfully  conversed  with  Aunt 
Mary  need  not  fear  to  attack  a  Wagner  Opera 
single-handed." 

Jack  did  not  say  anything.  His  heart  was 
athirst  for  Mrs.  Rosscott. 

She  was  back  in  her  own  library  the  next  night, 
and  he  rushed  thither  as  soon  as  his  first  day's 
labor  was  over.  She  was  prettier  and  her  eyes 
were  sweeter  and  brighter  than  ever  as  she  rose 
to  meet  him  and  held  out — first  one  hand,  and 
then  both.  He  took  the  one  hand  and  then  the 
two  and  the  longing  that  possessed  him  was  so 
overwhelming  that  only  his  acute  consideration 


A   DEPARTURE   AND   A   RETURN     229 

for  all  she  was  to  him  kept  him  from  taking  more 
yet. 

"  And  the  week's  over,"  she  said,  when  she  had 
dragged  her  fingers  out  of  his  and  gone  and  nestled 
down  upon  the  divan,  among  the  pillows  that 
rivaled  each  other  in  their  attempts  to  get  closer 
to  her,  "  the  week's  all  over  and  our  aunt  is 
gone." 

"  Yes,"  he  said,  rolling  his  favorite  chair  up 
near  to  her  seat,  "  all  is  over  and  well  over." 

She  smiled  and  he  smiled  too. 

"  She  must  have  enjoyed  it,"  she  said  thought- 
fully. 

"  Enjoyed  it!  "  said  Jack.  "She  won't  like  Para- 
dise in  comparison." 

"  And  you've  been  a  good  boy,"  said  Mrs.  Ross- 
cott,  regarding  him  merrily.  "  You've  played 
your  part  well." 

He  rose  to  his  feet  and  put  his  hand  to  his 
temple. 

"  I  salute  my  general,"  he  said.  "  I  was  well 
trained  in  the  maneuver." 

"  It's  odd,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott  thoughtfully. 
"  It  was  really  so  simple.  We  are  only  women 
after  all,  whether  it  is  I — or  Aunt  Mary — or  all 
the  rest  of  the  world.  We  do  so  crave  the  knowl- 
edge that  someone  cares  for  us — for  our  hours — 
for  our  pleasures.  It  isn't  the  bonbons — it's  that 


230    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

someone  troubled  to  buy  the  bonbons  because  he 
thought  that  they  would  please  us." 

"  Doesn't  a  man  have  the  same  feeling?  "  Jack 
asked.  "  It  isn't  the  tea  we  come  for — it's  the 
knowledge  that  someone  bothers  to  make  it  and 
sugar  it  and  cream  it." 

"  I  wasn't  laughing,"  said  she. 

"  I  wasn't  laughing  either,"  said  he. 

"  But  it's  true,"  she  went  on,  "  and  I  think  the 
solution  of  many  unhappy  puzzles  lies  there.  Don't 
forget  if  you  ever  have  a  wife  to  pay  lots  of  atten- 
tion to  her." 

"  I  always  have  paid  lots  of  attention  to  her, 
haven't  I  ?  "  he  demanded. 

Mrs.  Rosscott  shook  her  head. 

"We  won't  discuss  that,"  she  said.  "We'll 
stick  to  Aunt  Mary.  Aunt  Mary  is  a  rock  whose 
foundation  is  firm;  when  it  comes  to  your  rela- 
tions toward  other  women "  she  stopped, 

shrugging  her  shoulders,  and  he  understood. 

"  But  it's  going  to  come  out  all  right  now,  I'm 
sure,"  she  went  on  after  a  minute,  "  and  I'm  so 
glad — so  very  glad — that  the  chance  was  given 
to  me  to  right  the  wrong  that  I  was  the 
cause  of." 

He  looked  at  her  and  his  eyes  almost  burned, 
they  were  so  strong  in  their  leaping  desire  to  fling 
himself  at  her  feet  and  adore  her  goodness  and 


sweetness  and  worldliness  and  wisdom  from  that 
vantage-ground  of  worship. 

She  choked  a  little  at  the  glance  and  put  her 
hands  together  in  her  lap  with  a  quick  catching  at 
self-control. 

"  And  now  the  fun's  all  over  and  the  work 
begins,"  she  said,  looking  down. 

"  I  know  that,"  he  asseverated. 

She  lifted  up  her  eyes  and  looked  at  him  so  very 
kindly.  And  then — after  a  little  pause  to  gain 
command  of  word  and  thought  she  spoke  again, 
slowly. 

"  Listen,"  she  said,  this  time  very  softly,  but 
very  seriously.  "  I  want  to  tell  you  one  thing  and  I 
want  to  tell  it  to  you  now.  I  had  a  good  and  suf- 
ficient reason  for  helping  you  out  with  Aunt  Mary; 
but "  She  hesitated. 

"But?"  he  asked. 

"  But  I've  no  reason  at  all  for  helping  your  Aunt 
Mary  out  with  you,  unless  you  prove  worthy  of 
her,  and " 

"And?" 

She  looked  at  him,  and  shook  her  head  slightly. 

"  I  won't  say  '  and  of  me,'  "  she  said  finally. 

"  Why  not?  "  he  asked,  a  storm  of  tempestuous 
impatience  raging  behind  his  lips.  "  Do  say  it," 
he  pleaded. 

"  No,   I   can't  say  it.     It  wouldn't  be  right. 


232    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

I  don't  mean  it,  and  so  I  won't  say  it.  I'll  only 
tell  you  that  I  can  promise  nothing  as  things 
are,  and  that  unless  you  go  at  life  from  now  on 
with  a  tremendous  energy  I  never  shall  even  dream 
of  a  possible  promising." 

He  rose  to  his  feet  and  towered  above  her,  tall 
and  straight  and  handsome,  and  very  grave. 

"  All  right,"  he  said  simply.    "  I'll  remember." 

Ever  so  much  later  that  evening  he  rose  to  bid 
her  good-night. 

"  Whatever  comes,  you've  been  an  angel  to  me," 
he  said  in  that  hasty  five  seconds  that  her  hand  was 
his. 

"  Shall  I  ever  regret  it?  "  she  asked,  looking  up 
to  his  eyes. 

"  Never,"  he  declared  earnestly,  "  never, 
never.  I  can  swear  that,  and  I  shall  be  able  to 
swear  the  same  thing  when  I'm  as  old  as  my  Aunt 
Mary." 

Mrs.  Rosscott  lowered  her  eyes. 

"  Who  could  ask  more?  "  she  said  softly. 

"  I  could,"  said  Jack—"  but  I'll  wait  first." 


Chapter  Nineteen 
AUNT  MARY'S  RETURN 

JOSHUA  was  at  the  station  to  meet  his 
mistress,  and  Lucinda,  full  to  the  brim  with 
curiosity,  sat  on  the  back  seat  of  the  carryall. 

Aunt  Mary  quitted  the  train  with  a  dignity 
which  was  sufficiently  overpowering  to  counteract 
the  effect  of  her  bonnet's  being  somewhat  awry. 
She  greeted  Joshua  with  a  chill  perfunctoriness 
that  was  indescribable,  and  her  glance  glided  com- 
pletely over  Lucinda  and  faded  away  in  the  open 
country  on  the  further  side  of  her. 

Lucinda  did  not  care.  Lucinda  was  of  a  hardy 
stock  and  stormy  glances  neither  bent  nor  broke 
her  spirit. 

"  I'm  glad  to  see  you  come  back  looking  so 
well,"  she  screamed,  when  Aunt  Mary  was  in  and 
they  were  off. 

Aunt  Mary  raised  her  eyebrows  in  a  manner 
that  appeared  a  trifle  indignant,  and  riveted  her 
gaze  on  the  hindquarters  of  the  horse. 

"  I  thought  it  was  more  like  heaven  myself," 
she  said  coldly.  "  Not  that  your  opinion  matters 
any  to  me,  Lucinda." 

233 


234    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Then  she  leaned  forward  and  poked  the 
driver. 

"  Joshua  I  "  she  said. 

Joshua  jumped  in  his  seat  at  the  asperity  of  her 
poke  and  her  tone. 

"  What  is  it?  "  he  said  hastily. 

"  Jus'  's  soon  as  we  get  home  I  want  you  to  take 
the  saw — that  little,  sharp  one,  you  know — and 
dock  Billy's  tail.  Cut  it  off  as  close  as  you  can; 
do  you  hear?  " 

"  I  hear,"  was  the  startled  answer. 

"  Did  you  have  a  good  time?  "  Lucinda  had  the 
temerity  to  ask,  after  a  minute. 

"  I  guess  I  could  if  I  tried,"  the  lady  replied; 
"  but  I'm  too  tired  to  try  now." 

"  How  did  you  leave  Mr.  Jack?  " 

"  I  couldn't  stay  forever,  could  I  ?  "  asked  the 
traveler  impatiently.  "  I  thought  that  a  week  was 
long  enough  for  the  first. time,  anyhow." 

Lucinda  subsided  and  the  rest  of  the  drive  was 
taken  in  silence.  When  they  reached  the  house 
Aunt  Mary  enveloped  everything  in  one  glance  of 
blended  weariness,  scorn  and  contempt,  and  then 
made  short  work  of  getting  to  bed,  where  she  slept 
the  luxurious  and  dreamless  sleep  of  the  unjust  until 
late  that  afternoon. 

"  My,  but  she's  come  back  a  terror!  "  Lucinda 
cried  to  Joshua  in  a  high  whisper  when  he  brought 


AUNT   MARY'S   RETURN  235 

in  the  trunk.  "  She  looks  like  nothin'  was  goin' 
to  be  good  enough  for  her  from  now  on." 

"  Nothin'  ain't  goin'  to  be  good  enough  for 
her,"  said  Joshua  calmly. 

"What  are  we  goin'  to  do,  then?"  asked 
Lucinda. 

"  We'll  have  enough  to  do,"  said  Joshua,  in  a 
tone  that  was  portentous  in  the  extreme,  and  then 
he  placed  the  trunk  in  its  proper  position  for 
unpacking  and  went  away,  leaving  Lucinda  to 
unpack  it. 

Aunt  Mary  awoke  just  as  the  faithful  servant 
was  unrolling  the  green  plaid  waist,  and  the  instant 
that  she  spoke  it  was  plain  that  her  attitude 
toward  life  in  general  was  become  strangely  and 
vigorously  changed,  and  that  for  Lucinda  the  rack 
was  to  be  newly  oiled  and  freshly  racking. 

This  attitude  was  not  in  any  degree  altered  by 
the  unexpected  arrival  of  Arethusa  that  evening. 
Strange  tales  had  reached  Arethusa's  ears,  and  she 
had  flown  on  the  wings  of  steam  and  coal  dust  to 
see  what  under  the  sun  it  all  meant.  Aunt  Mary 
was  not  one  bit  rejoiced  to  see  her  and  the  glare 
which  she  directed  over  the  edge  of  the  counter- 
pane bore  testimony  to  the  truth  of  this  statement. 
'  Whatever  did  you  come  for?  "  she  demanded 
inhospitably.  "  Lucinda  didn't  send  for  you,  did 
she?" 


236    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Arethusa  screamed  the  best  face  that  she  could 
onto  her  visit,  but  Aunt  Mary  listened  with  an 
inattention  that  was  anything  but  flattering. 

"  I  don't  feel  like  talkin'  over  my  trip,"  she  said, 
when  she  saw  her  niece's  lips  cease  to  move.  "  Of 
course  I  enjoyed  myself  because  I  was  with  Jack, 
but  as  to  what  we  did  an'  said  you  couldn't  under- 
stand it  all  if  I  did  tell  you,  so  what's  the  use  of 
botherin'." 

Arethusa  looked-neutral,  calm  and  curious.  But 
Aunt  Mary  frowned  and  shook  her  head. 

"  S'long  as  you're  here,  though,  I  suppose  you 
may  as  well  make  yourself  useful,"  she  said  a  few 
minutes  later.  "  Come  to  think  of  it,  there's  an 
errand  I  want  you  to  do  for  me.  I  want  you  to  go 
to  Boston  the  very  first  thing  to-morrow  morning 
an'  buy  me  some  cotton." 

Arethusa  stared  blankly. 

"  Well,"  said  the  aunt,  "  if  you  can't  hear,  you'd 
better  take  my  ear-trumpet  and  I'll  say  it  over 
again." 

"  What  kind  of  cotton?  "  Arethusa  yelled. 

"  Not  stockin'sf  "  said  Aunt  Mary;  "  Cotton! 
Cotton!  C-O-T-T-O-N!  It  beats  the  Dutch 
how  deaf  everyone  is  gettin',  an'  if  I  had  your  ears 
in  particular,  Arethusa,  I'd  certainly  hire  a  carpen- 
ter to  get  at  'em  with  a  bit-stalk.  Jus's  if  you  didn't 
know  as  well  as  I  do  how  many  stockin's  I've  got 


AUNT   MARY'S   RETURN  237 

already  1  I  should  think  you'd  quit  bein'  so  heed- 
less, an'  use  your  commonsense,  anyhow.  I've 
found  commonsense  a  very  handy  thing  in  talkin* 
always.  Always." 

Arethusa  launched  herself  full  tilt  into  the  ear- 
trumpet. 

"  What — kind — of — cotton?  "  she  asked  in  that 
key  of  voice  which  makes  the  crowd  pause  in  a 
panic. 

Aunt  Mary  looked  disgusted. 

"  The  Boston  kind,"  she  said,  nipping  her  lips. 

Arethusa  took  a  double  hitch  on  her  larynx,  and 
tried  again. 

"  Do  you  mean  thread?  " 

Aunt  Mary's  disgust  deepened  visibly. 

"  If  I  meant  silk  I  guess  I  wouldn't  say  cotton. 
I  might  just  happen  to  say  silk.  I've  been  in  the 
habit  of  saying  silk  when  I  meant  silk  and  cotton 
when  I  meant  cotton,  for  quite  a  number  of 
years,  and  I  might  not  have  changed  to-day — I 
might  just  happen  to  not  have.  I  might  not  have 
— maybe." 

Arethusa  withered  under  this  bitter  irony. 

"  How  many  spools  do  you  want?  "  she  asked 
in  a  meek  but  piercing  howl. 

"  I  don't  care,"  said  Aunt  Mary  loftily.  "  I 
don't  care  how  many — or  what  color — or  what 
number.  I  just  want  some  Boston  cotton,  and  I 


238    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

want  to  see  you  settin'  out  to  get  it  pretty  promptly 
to-morrow  morning." 

"  But  if  you  only  want  some  cotton,"  Arethusa 
yelled,  with  a  force  which  sent  crimson  waves  all 
over  her,  "  why  can't  I  get  it  in  the  village?  " 

Aunt  Mary  shot  one  look  at  her  niece  and  the 
latter  felt  the  concussion. 

"  Because — I—want — you— to — get — it — in 
— Boston,"  she  said,  filling  the  breaks  between  her 
words  with  a  concentrated  essence  of  acerbity  such 
as  even  she  had  never  displayed  before.  "  When 
I  say  a  thing,  I  mean  it  pretty  generally.  Quite 
often — most  always.  I  want  that  cotton  and  it's 
to  be  bought  in  Boston.  There's  a  train  that  goes 
in  at  seven-forty-five,  and  if  you  don't  favor  the 
idea  of  ridin'  on  it  you  can  take  the  express  that 
goes  by  at  six-five." 

Arethusa  pressed  her  hands  very  tightly  together 
and  carried  the  discussion  no  further.  She  went  to 
bed  early  and  rose  early  the  next  morning  and 
Joshua  drove  her  in  town  to  the  seven-forty-five. 

"  It  doesn't  seem  to  me  that  my  aunt  is  very 
well,"  the  niece  said  during  the  drive.  "  What  do 
you  think?  " 

"  I  don't  think  anything  about  her,"  said  Joshua 
with  great  candor.  "  If  I  was  to  give  to  thinkin' 
I'd  o'  moved  out  to  Chicago  an'  been  scalpin' 
Indians  to-day." 


239 

"  I  wonder  if  that  trip  to  New  York  was  good 
for  her?  "  Arethusa  wondered  mildly. 

Joshua  flicked  Billy  with  the  whip  and  refused  to 
voice  any  opinion  as  to  New  York's  effect  on  his 
mistress. 

Arethusa  was  well  on  her  w|ay  to  Boston  when 
Aunt  Mary's  bell,  rung  with  a  sharp  jangle,  sum- 
moned Lucinda  to  open  her  bedroom  blinds.  While 
Lucinda  was  leaning  far  out  and  attempting  to 
cause  said  blinds  to  catch  on  the  hooks,  which 
habitually  held  them  back  against  the  side  of  the 
house,  her  mistress  addressed  her  with  a  suddeness 
which  showed  that  she  had  awakened  with  her  wits 
surprisingly  well  in  hand. 

"Where's  Joshua?  Is  he  got  back  from  Are- 
thusa ?  Answer  me,  Lucinda." 

Lucinda  drew  herself  in  through  the  open  win- 
dow with  an  alacrity  remarkable  for  one  of  her 
years. 

"  Yes,  he's  back,"  she  yelled. 

Aunt  Mary  looked  at  her  with  a  sort  of  incensed 
patience. 

"  Well,  what's  he  doin'?  If  he's  back,  where  is 
he  ?  Lucinda,  if  you  knew  how  hard  it  is  for  me  to 
keep  quiet  you'd  answer  when  I  asked  things.  Why 
in  Heaven's  name  don't  you  say  suthin'?  Any- 
thin'  ?  Anythin'  but  nothin',  that  is." 

"  He's  mowin',"  Lucinda  shrieked. 


240    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Sewin' !  "  exclaimed  Aunt  Mary.  "  What's  he 
sewin'  ?  Where's  he  sewin'  ?  Have  you  stopped 
doin'  his  darnin'?  " 

Lucinda  gathered  breath  by  compressing  her 
sides  with  her  hands,  and  then  replied,  directing  her 
voice  right  into  the  ear-trumpet: 

"  He's  mowin'  the  back  lawn." 

Aunt  Mary  winced  and  shivered. 

"  My  heavens,  Lucinda !  "  she  exclaimed, 
sharply.  "  I  wish't  there  was  a  school  to  teach  out- 
siders the  use  of  an  ear-trumpet.  They  can't  seem 
to  hit  the  medium  between  either  mumblin'  or 
splittin*  one's  ear  drums." 

Lucinda  was  too  much  out  of  breath  from  her 
effort  to  attempt  any  audible  penitence.  Her  mis- 
tress continued : 

"  Well,  you  find  him  wherever  he  is,  and  tell 
him  to  harness  up  the  buggy  and  go  and  get  Mr. 
Stebbins  as  quick  as  ever  he  can.  Hurry !  " 

Lucinda  exited  with  a  promptitude  that  fulfilled 
all  that  her  lady's  heart  could  wish.  She  found 
Joshua  whetting  his  scythe. 

"  She  wants  Mr.  Stebbins  right  off,"  said 
Lucinda. 

"  Then  she'll  get  Mr.  Stebbins  right  off,"  said 
Joshua.  And  he  headed  immediately  for  the  barn. 

Lucinda  ran  along  beside  him.  It  did  seem  to 
Lucinda  as  if  in  compensation  for  her  slavery  to 


AUNT   MARY'S   RETURN 

Aunt  Mary  she  might  have  had  a  sympathizer  in 
Joshua. 

"  I  guess  she  wants  to  change  her  will,"  she 
panted,  very  much  out  of  breath. 

"  Then  she'll  change  her  will,"  said  Joshua. 
And  as  his  steady  gait  was  much  quicker  than  poor 
Lucinda's  halting  amble,  and  as  he  saw  no  occasion 
to  alter  it,  the  conversation  between  them  dwindled 
into  space  then  and  there. 

Half  an  hour  later  Billy  went  out  of  the  drive 
at  a  swinging  pace  and  an  hour  after  that  Mr. 
Stebbins  was  brought  captive  to  Aunt  Mary's 
throne. 

She  welcomed  him  cordially;  Lucinda  was 
promptly  locked  out,  and  then  the  old  lady  and  her 
lawyer  spent  a  momentous  hour  together.  Mr. 
Stebbins  was  taken  into  his  client's  fullest  confi- 
dence; he  was  regaled  with  enough  of  the  week's 
history  to  guess  the  rest;  and  he  foresaw  the  out- 
come as  he  had  foreseen  it  from  the  moment  of  the 
rupture. 

Aunt  Mary  was  very  sincere  in  owning  up  to  her 
own  past  errors. 

"  I  made  a  big  mistake  about  the  life  that  boy 
was  leadin',"  she  said  in  the  course  of  the  conversa- 
tion. "  He  took  me  everywhere  where  he  was  in 
the  habit  of  goin',  an'  so  far  from  its  bein'  wicked, 
I  never  enjoyed  myself  so  much  in  my  life.  There 


ain't  no  harm  in  havin'  fun,  an'  it  does  cost  a  lot  of 
money.  I  can  understand  it  all  now,  an'  as  I'm  a 
great  believer  in  settin'  wrong  right  whenever  you 
can,  I  want  Jack  put  right  in  my  will  right  off.  I 

want "  and  then  were  unfolded  the  glorious 

possibilities  of  the  future  for  her  youngest,  petted 
nephew.  He  was  not  only  to  be  reinstated  in  the 
will,  but  he  was  to  reign  supreme.  The  other  four 
children  were  to  be  rich — very  rich, —  but  Jack  was 
to  be  the  heir. 

Mr.  Stebbins  was  well  pleased.  He  was  very 
fond  of  Jack  and  had  always  been  particularly 
patient  with  him  on  that  account.  He  felt  that  this 
was  a  personal  reward  of  merit,  for  it  cannot  be 
denied  that  Jack  had  certainly  cashed  very  large 
checks  on  the  bank  of  his  forbearance. 

When  all  was  finished,  and  Joshua  and  Lucinda 
had  been  called  in  and  had  duly  affixed  their  signa- 
tures to  the  important  document,  the  buggy  was 
brought  to  the  door  again  and  Mr.  Stebbins  stepped 
in  and  allowed  himself  to  be  replaced  where  they 
had  taken  him  from. 

Joshua  returned  alone. 

"  There,  what  did  I  tell  you !  "  said  Lucinda, 
who  was  waiting  for  him  behind  the  wood-house, — 
"  she  did  want  to  change  her  will." 

"Well,  she  changed  it,  didn't  she?"  said 
Joshua. 


AUNT   MARY'S   RETURN  243 

"  I  guess  she  wants  to  give  him  all  she's  got, 
since  that  week  in  New  York,"  said  Lucinda. 

"  Then  she'll  give  him  all  she's  got,"  said 
Joshua. 

Lucinda's  eyes  grew  big. 

"  An'  she'll  give  it  to  you,  too,  if  you  don't  look 
out  and  stay  where  you  can  hear  her  bell  if  she 
rings  it,"  Joshua  added,  with  his  usual  frankness, 
and  then  he  whipped  up  Billy  and  drove  on  to  the 
barn. 

Arethusa  returned  late  in  the  afternoon,  very 
warm,  very  wilted.  Aunt  Mary  looked  over  the 
cotton  purchase,  and  deigned  to  approve. 

"  But,  my  heavens,  Arethusa,"  she  exclaimed 
immediately  afterwards,  "  if  you  had  any  idea  how 
dirty  and  dusty  and  altogether  awful  you  do  look, 
you  wouldn't  be  able  to  get  to  soap  and  water  fast 
enough." 

At  that  poor  Arethusa  sighed,  and,  gathering  up 
her  hat,  and  hat-pins,  and  veil,  and  gloves,  and 
purse,  and  handkerchief,  went  away  to  wash. 


Chapter  Twenty 

JACK'S  JOY 

A3UT  the  first  of  July  many  agreeable  things 
happened. 
One  was  that  Mr.  Stebbins  found  it  advis- 
able to  address  a  discreet  letter  to  John  Watkins, 
Jr.,  Denham,  conveying  the  information  that  al- 
though he  must  not  count  unduly  upon  the  future, 
still,  if  he  behaved  himself,  he  might  with  safety 
allow  his  expenditures  to  mount  upward  monthly  to 
a  certain  limit.  This  was  the  way  in  which  Aunt 
Mary  salved  her  conscience  and  saved  her  pride  all 
at  once. 

"  I  don't  want  him  to  think  that  I  don't  mean 
things  when  I  say  'em,"  she  had  carefully  explained 
to  Mr.  Stebbins,  "tut  I  can't  bear  to  think  that 
there's  anybody  in  New  York  without  money 
enough  to  have  a  good  time  there." 

Mr.  Stebbins  had  made  a  note  of  the  sum  which 
the  allowance  was  to  compass  and  had  promised  to 
write  the  letter  at  once. 

"  What  did  you  do  the  last  time  you  were  in  the 
city?  "  Aunt  Mary  asked. 

"  I  was  much  occupied  with  business,"  said  the 
244 


JACK'S   JOY  .        245 

* 

lawyer,  "  but  I  found  time  to  visit  the  Metro- 
politan Museum  of  Art  and " 

"  Good  gracious !  "  exclaimed  Aunt  Mary, 
"  who  was  takin'  you  'round !  I  never  had  a  second 
for  any  museums  or  arts ; — you  ought  to  have  seen 
a  vaudeville,  or  that  gondola  place  !  I  was  ferried 
around  four  times  and  the  music  lasted  all 
through."  She  stopped  and  reflected.  "  I  guess 
you  can  make  that  money  a  hundred  a  month 
more,"  she  said  slowly.  "  I  don't  want  the  boy 
to  ever  feel  stinted  or  have  to  run  in  debt." 

Mr.  Stebbins  smiled,  and  the  result  was  that  Jack 
began  to  pay  up  the  bills  for  his  aunt's  entertain- 
ment very  much  more  rapidly  than  he  had  antici- 
pated doing. 

Another  pleasant  thing  was  that  a  week  or  so 
later — very  soon  after  Mrs.  Rosscott  had  given 
up  her  town  house  and  returned  to  the  protection 
of  the  parental  slate-tiles — Burnett's  father,  a 
peppery  but  jovial  old  gentleman  (we  all  know 
the  kind),  suddenly  asked  why  Bob  never  came 
home  any  more.  This  action  on  the  part  of  the 
head  of  the  house  being  tantamount  to  the  com- 
pletest  possible  forgiveness  and  obliviousness  of  the 
past,  Burnett's  mother,  of  whom  the  inquiry  had 
been  made,  wept  tears  of  sincerest  joy  and  wrote 
to  the  youngest  of  her  flock  to  return  to  the  ances- 
tral fold  just  as  soon  as  he  possibly  could.  He 


246    REJUVENATION   OP   AUNT   MARY 

came,  and  as  a  result,  a  fortnight  later  Jack  came, 
and  Mitchell  came,  and  Clover  came.  Mrs.  Ross- 
cott,  as  we  have  previously  stated,  was  already 
there,  and  so  were  Maude  Lome  and  a  great  many 
others.  Some  of  the  others  were  pretty  girls  and 
Burnett  and  two  of  his  friends  found  plenty  to 
amuse  them,  but  Burnett's  dearest  friend,  his 
bosom  friend,  his  Fidus  Achates,  found  no  one  to 
amuse  him,  because  he  was  in  earnest,  and  had  eyes 
for  no  feminine  prettiness,  his  sight  being  dazzled 
by  the  radiance  of  one  surpassing  loveliness.  He 
had  worked  tremendously  hard  the  first  month  of 
daily  laboring,  and  felt  he  deserved  a  reward.  Be 
it  said  for  Jack  that  the  reward  of  which  Aunt 
Mary  had  the  bestowing  counted  for  very  little 
with  him  except  in  its  relation  to  the  far  future. 
The  real  goal  which  he  was  striving  toward,  the 
real  laurels  that  he  craved — Ah!  they  lay  in 
another  direction. 

Middle  July  is  a  lovely  time  to  get  off  among  the 
trees  and  grass,  and  lie  around  in  white  flannels  or 
white  muslins,  just  as  the  case  may  be.  It  was  too 
warm  to  do  much  else  than  that,  and  Heaven  knows 
that  Jack  desired  nothing  better,  as  long  as  his  god- 
dess smiled  upon  him. 

It  was  curious  about  his  goddess.  She  seemed  to 
grow  more  beautiful  every  time  that  he  saw  her. 
Perhaps  it  was  her  native  air  that  gave  her  that 


JACK'S   JOY  247 

charming  flush ;  perhaps  it  was  the  joy  of  being  at 
home  again;  perhaps  it  was — no,  he  didn't  dare 
to  hope  that.  Not  yet.  Not  even  with  all  that  she 
had  done  for  him  fresh  in  his  memory.  The 
humility  of  true  love  was  so  heavy  on  his  heart  that 
his  very  dreams  were  dulled  with  hopelessness,  the 
majority  of  them  seeming  too  vividly  dyed  in  Para- 
dise hues  for  their  fulfillment  in  daily  life  to  ever 
appear  possible.  But  still  he  was  very,  very  happy 
to  be  there  with  her — beside  her — and  to  hear  her 
voice  and  look  into  her  eyes  whenever  the  trouble- 
some "  other  people  "  would  leave  them  alone  to- 
gether. And  she  did  seem  happy,  too.  And  so 
rejoiced  that  the  tide  of  Aunt  Mary's  wrath  had 
been  successfully  turned.  And  so  rejoiced  that  he 
was  at  work,  even  in  the  face  of  her  hopes  as  to  his 
college  career.  And  also  so  rejoiced  to  take  up 
the  gay,  careless  thread  of  their  mutual  pleasure 
again. 

The  morning  after  the  gathering  of  the  party 
was  Saturday  and  an  ideal  day — that  sort  of  ideal 
day  when  house  parties  naturally  sift  into  pairs  and 
then  fade  away  altogether.  The  country  surround- 
ing our  particular  party  was  densely  wooded  and 
not  at  all  settled,  the  woods  were  laid  out  in  a 
fascinating  system  of  walks  and  benches  which  in 
no  case  commanded  views  of  one  another,  and  the 
shade  overhead  was  the  shade  of  July  and  as  propi- 


248    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

tious  to  rest  as  it  was  to  motion.  Mitchell  took  a 
girl  in  gray  and  two  sets  of  golf  clubs  and  started 
out  in  the  opposite  direction  from  the  links,  Clover 
took  a  girl  in  green  and  a  camera  and  went  another 
way,  Burnett  took  a  girl  in  a  riding  habit  and  two 
saddle  horses  and  followed  the  horses'  noses 
whither  they  led,  and  Jack — Jack  smoked  cigar- 
ettes on  the  piazza  and  waited — waited. 

Mrs.  Rosscott  came  out  after  a  while  and  asked 
him  why  he  didn't  go  to  walk  also. 

"  Just  what  I  was  thinking  as  to  yourself,"  he 
said,  very  boldly  as  to  voice,  and  very  beseechingly 
as  to  eyes. 

"  Oh,  I'm  so  busy,"  she  said,  laughing  up  into 
his  eyes  and  then  laughing  down  at  the  ground — 
"  you  see  I'm  the  only  married  daughter  to  help 


mamma." 


"  But  you've  been  helping  all  the  morning,"  he 
complained,  "  and  besides  how  can  you  help?  One 
would  think  that  your  mother  was  beating  eggs  or 
turning  mattresses." 

"  I  have  to  work  harder  than  that,"  said  Mrs. 
Rosscott;  "  I  have  to  make  people  know  one  an- 
other and  like  one  another  and  not  all  want  to 
make  love  to  the  same  girl." 

"  You  can't  help  their  all  wanting  to  make  love 
to  the  same  girl,"  said  Jack;  "  the  more  you  try 
to  convince  them  of  their  folly  the  deeper  in  love 


JACK'S   JOY  249 

they  are  bound  to  fall.  I'm  an  illustration  of 
that  myself." 

Mrs.  Rosscott  looked  at  him  then  and  curved  her 
mouth  sweetly. 

"  You  do  say  such  pretty  things,"  she  said.  "  I 
don't  see  how  you've  learned  so  much  in  so  little 
time.  Why,  General  Jiggs  in  there  is  three  times 
your  age  and  he  tangles  himself  awfully  when  he 
tries  to  be  sweet." 

"  Perhaps  his  physician  has  recommended  gym- 
nastics," said  Jack. 

"  Perhaps,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott  laughing,  and 
then  she  turned  as  if  to  go  in. 

"  Oh,  don't,"  said  her  lover,  barring  the  way 
with  great  suddenness;  "  you  really  mustn't,  you 
know.  I've  been  patient  for  so  long  and  been  good 
for  so  long  and  I  must  be  rewarded — I  really 
must.  Do  come  out  with  me  somewhere — any- 
where— for  only  a  half-hour, — please." 

She  looked  at  him. 

"  Won't  Maude  do?  "  she  asked. 

"No,  she  won't,"  he  said  beneath  his  breath; 
"  whatever  do  you  suggest  such  a  thing  for?  You 
make  me  ready  to  tell  you  to  your  face  that  you 
want  to  go  as  bad  as  I  want  you  to  go,  but  I  shan't 
say  so  because  I  know  too  much." 

"  You  do  know  a  lot,  don't  you?  "  said  she,  with 
an  expression  of  great  respect;  "  why,  if  you  were 


250    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT  MARY 

to  dare  to  hint  to  me  that  I  wanted  to  go  out  with 
you  instead  of  staying  in  and  talking  Rembrandt 
with  Mr.  Morley,  I'd  never  forgive  you  the  longest 
day  I  live." 

"  I  know  you  wouldn't,"  said  he,  "  and  you  may 
be  quite  sure  that  I  shall  not  say  it.  On  the  con- 
trary I  shall  merely  implore  you  to  forget  your  own 
pleasure  in  consideration  of  mine." 

"  I  really  ought  to  devote  the  morning  to  Mr. 
Morley,"  she  said  meditatively;  "  it's  such  an 
honor  his  coming  here,  you  know." 

"  A  little  bit  of  a  whiskered  monkey,"  said  Jack 
in  great  disgust;  "  an  honor,  indeed  !  " 

"  He's  a  very  great  man,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott; 
"  every  sort  of  institution  has  given  him  a  few 
letters  to  put  after  his  name,  and  some  have  given 
him  whole  syllables." 

"  You  must  get  a  straw  hat,  you  know,  or  a  sun- 
shade; it  will  be  hot  in  half  an  hour." 

"  Oh,  I  couldn't  stay  out  half  an  hour;  fifteen 
minutes  would  be  the  longest." 

"  All  right,  fifteen  minutes,  then,  but  do  hurry." 

"  I  didn't  say  that  I  would  go,"  she  said,  open- 
ing her  eyes;  "  and  yet  I  feel  myself  gone."  She 
laughed  lightly. 

"  Do  hurry,"  he  pleaded  freshly;  "  oh,  I  am  so 
hungry  to " 

She  disappeared  within  doors  and  five  minutes 


JACK'S   JOY  251 

later  came  back  with  one  of  those  charming  floppy 
English  garden  hats,  tied  with  a  muslin  bow  be- 
neath her  dimpled  chin. 

"  This  is  so  good  of  me,"  she  said,  as  they  went 
down  the  steps. 

"Very  good,  heavenly  good,"  said  Jack;  and 
then  neither  spoke  again  until  they  had  crossed  the 
Italian  garden  and  entered  the  American  wood. 
She  looked  into  his  eyes  then  and  smiled  half-shyly 
and  half-provokingly. 

"  You  are  such  a  baby,"  she  said;  "  such  a  baby  ! 
Do  ask  me  why  and  I'll  tell  you  half  a  dozen  whys. 
I'd  love  to."  J 

The  path  was  the  smoothest  and  shadiest  of 
forest  paths,  the  hour  was  the  sweetest  and  sunniest 
of  summer  hours,  the  moment  was  the  brightest  and 
happiest  of  all  the  moments  which  they  had  known 
together — up  to  now. 

"  Do  tell  me,"  he  said;  "  I'm  wild  to  know." 

He  took  her  hand  and  laid  it  on  his  arm.  For 
that  little  while  she  was  certainly  his  and  his  alone, 
and  no  man  had  a  better  claim  to  her.  "  Go  on 
and  tell  me,"  he  repeated. 

'  There  is  one  big  reason  and  there  are  lots  of 
little  ones.  Which  will  you  have  first?  " 

'  The  little  ones,  please. 

''  Then,  listen ;  you  are  like  a  baby  because  you 
are  impatient,  because  you  are  spoilt,  because  when 


252      REJUVENATION   OF  AUNT  MARY 

you  want  anything  you  think  that  you  must  have 
it,  and  because  you  like  to  be  walked  with." 

"  Are  those  the  little  reasons,"  he  said  when  she 
paused  ;  "  and  what's  the  big  one  ?  " 

"  The  big  one,"  she  said  slowly ;  "  Oh,  I'm 
afraid  that  you  won't  like  the  big  one ! " 

"  Perhaps  it  will  be  all  the  better  for  me  if  I 
don't,"  he  laughed ;  "  at  any  rate  I  beg  and  pray 
and  plead  to  know  it." 

"  What  a  dear  boy  !  "  she  laughed.  "  If  you 
want  to  know  as  badly  as  that,  I'd  have  to  tell 
you  anyhow,  whether  I  wanted  to  or  not.  It's 
because  I'm  so  much  the  oldest." 

"  Oh  !  "  said  Jack,  much  disappointed.  "  Is 
that  why?" 

"And  then  too,"  she  continued,  "you  seem  even 
younger  because  of  your  being  so  unsophisticated." 

"  So  I  am  unsophisticated,  am  I  ? "  he  asked 
grimly. 

"Yes,"  she  said  nodding;  "  at  least  you  impress 
me  so." 

"  I'm  glad  of  that,"  he  said  after  a  little  pause. 

She  looked  up  quickly. 

"Truly?" 

"Yes,  indeed." 

"  Oh,"  she  laughed,  "  if  you  say  that,  then  I 
shall  know  that  you  are  less  unsophisticated  than 
I  thought  you  were." 


JACK'S  JOY  253 

"Why  so  ?  "  he  asked  surprised. 

"  Don't  you  know  that  meek,  mild  men  always 
try  to  insinuate  that  they  are  regular  fire-eaters, 
and  vice  versa  ?  Well,  it's  so — and  it's  so  every 
time.  There  was  once  a  man  who  was  kissing  me, 
and  he  drew  my  hands  up  around  his  neck  in  such 
a  clever,  gentle  way  that  I  was  absolutely  positive 
that  he  had  had  no  end  of  practice  drawing  arms 
up  in  that  way  and  I  just  couldn't  help  saying : 
1  Oh,  how  many  women  you  must  have  kissed  ! ' 
What  do  you  think  he  answered  ? — merely  smiled 
and  said :  (  Not  so  many  as  you  might  imagine.' 
He  showed  how  much  he  knew  by  the  way  he 
answered,  for  oh !  he  had.  I  found  that  out 
afterwards." 

"  What  did  you  do  then  ?"  he  asked,  frowning. 
"Cut  him?" 

"  No ;  I  married  him.  Why,  of  course  I  was 
going  to  marry  him  when  he  kissed  me,  or  I 
wouldn't  have  let  him  kiss  me.  Do  you  suppose 
I  let  men  kiss  me  as  a  general  thing  ?  What  are 
you  thinking  of?" 

"  I  was  thinking  of  you,"  he  said.  "  It's  a 
horrible  habit  I've  fallen  into  lately.  But,  never 
mind  ;  keep  on  talking." 

"  I  don't  remember  what  I  was  saying,"  she  said. 
"  Oh,  yes,  I  do  too.  About  men,  about  good  and 
bad  men.  Now,  even  if  I  didn't  know  how  much 


254    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

trouble  you'd  made  in  the  world,  I'd  divine  it  all 
the  instant  that  you  were  willing  to  admit  being 
unsophisticated.  People  always  crave  to  be  the 
opposite  of  what  they  are ;  the  drug  shops  couldn't 
sell  any  peroxide  of  hydrogen  if  that  wasn't  so." 

He  laughed  and  forgot  his  previous  vexation. 

"  Now,  look  at  me,"  she  continued.  "  Oh,  I 
didn't  mean  really — I  mean  figuratively;  but 
never  mind.  Now,  I'm  nothing  but  a  bubble  and  a 
toy,  and  I  ache  to  be  considered  a  philosopher. 
Don't  you  remember  my  telling  you  what  a  philos- 
opher I  was,  the  very  first  conversation  that  we 
ever  had  together?  I  do  try  so  hard  to  delude 
myself  into  thinking  I  am  one,  that  some  days  I'm 
almost  sure  that  I  really  am  one.  Last  night,  for 
instance,  I  was  thinking  how  nice  it  would  be  for 
my  Cousin  Maude  to  marry  you." 

"Ye  gods!"  cried  Jack. 

"  She's  so  very  rich,"  Mrs.  Rosscott  pursued 
calmly;  "  and  you  know  the  law  of  heredity  is  an 
established  scientific  fact  now,  so  you  could  feel 
quite  safe  as  to  her  nose  skipping  the  next 
generation." 

Jack  was  audibly  amused. 

"  It's  not  anything  to  laugh  over,"  his  compan- 
ion continued  gravely.  "  It's  something  to  pon- 
der and  pray  over.  If  I  were  Maude  I  should 
be  on  my  knees  about  it  most  of  the  time." 


JACK'S   JOY  255 

"  Nothing  can  help  her  now,"  said  Jack.  "  Her 
parents  have  been  and  gone  and  done  it,  as  far  as 
she's  concerned,  forever.  Prayer  won't  change  her 
nose,  although  age  may  broaden  it  still  more." 

"  Don't  you  believe  that  nothing  can  help  her 
now.  A  good-looking  husband  could  help  her  lots. 
I've  seen  homelier  girls  than  she  go  just  every- 
where— on  account  of  their  husbands,  you  know. 
That  was  where  my  philosophy  came  in." 

"  I'd  quite  forgotten  your  philosophy."  He 
laughed  again  as  he  spoke.  u  I  must  apologize. 
Please  tell  me  more  about  it." 

She  laughed,  too. 

"  I'm  going  to.  You  see,  I  was  lying  there, 
looking  out  at  the  moon,  and  thinking  how  nice  it 
would  be  for  Maude  to  marry  you." 

"  Did  you  consider  me  at  all?  "  he  interposed. 

"How  you  interrupt!"  she  declared,  in  exas- 
peration. "  You  never  let  me  finish." 

"  I  am  dumb." 

"  Well,  I  thought  how  nice  it  would  be  for 
Maude  to  marry  you.  You'd  have  a  baron  for  a 
papa-in-law,  and  an  heiress  to  balance  Aunt  Mary 
with.  If  you  went  into  consumption  and  had  to 
retreat  to  Arizona  for  a  term  of  years,  the  climate 
could  not  ruin  her  complexion  as  it  would  m — most 
people's.  And  she's  so  ready  to  have  you  that  it's 
almost  pathetic.  I  can't  imagine  anything  more 


256    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

awful  than  to  be  as  ready  to  marry  a  man  who  is'nt 
at  all  desirous  of  so  doing,  as  Maude  is  of  marry- 
ing you.  But  if  you  would  only  think  about  it.  I 
thought  and  thought  about  it  last  night  and  the 
longer  I  thought  the  more  it  seemed  like  such  a  nice 
arrangement  all  around;  and  then — all  of  a  sud- 
den— do  you  know  I  began  to  wonder  if  I  was 
philosopher  enough  to  enjoy  being  matron-of-honor 
to  Maude  and  really " 

"  At  the  wedding  I  could  have  kissed  you !  "  he 
exclaimed,  and  suddenly  subsided  at  the  look  with 
which  she  withered  his  boldness. 

"  And  really  I  wasn't  altogether  sure;  and  then, 
it  occurred  to  me  that  nothing  on  the  face  of  the 
earth  would  ever  persuade  you  to  marry  Maude. 
And  I  saw  my  card  castle  go  smashing  down,  and 
then  I  saw  that  I  really  am  a  philosopher,  after  all, 
for — for  I  didn't  mind  a  bit!  " 

Jack  threw  his  head  back  and  roared. 

"  Oh,"  he  said  after  a  minute,  "  you  are  so 
refreshing.  You  ruffle  me  up  just  to  give  me  the 
joy  of  smoothing  me  down,  don't  you?  " 

"  I  do  what  I  can  to  amuse  you,"  she  said, 
demurely.  "  You  are  my  father's  guest  and  my 
brother's  friend,  and  so  I  ought  to — oughtn't  I  ?  " 

"  Yes,"  he  said,  "  I  have  a  two-fold  claim  on 
you  if  you  look  at  it  that  way  and  some  day  I  mean 
to  go  to  work  and  unfold  still  another." 


JACK'S    JOY  257 

They  had  come  to  a  delightful  little  nook  where 
the  trees  sighed  gently,  "  Sit  down,"  and  there 
seemed  to  be  no  adequate  reason  for  refusing  the 
invitation. 

"  Let's  rest,  I  know  you're  tired,"  the  young 
man  said  gently,  and  the  next  minute  found  his 
companion  down  upon  the  soft  grass,  her  back 
against  a  twisted  tree-root  and  her  hands  about  her 
knees. 

He  threw  himself  down  beside  her  and  the  hush 
and  the  song  of  mid-summer  were  all  about  them, 
filling  the  air,  and  their  ears,  and  their  hearts  all  at 
once. 

Presently  he  took  her  hand  up  out  of  the  grass 
where  its  fingers  had  wandered  to  hide  themselves, 
and  kissed  it.  She  looked  at  him  reprovingly  when 
it  was  too  late,  and  shook  her  head. 

"  Such  a  little  one!  "  he  said. 

"  I  call  it  a  pretty  big  one,"  she  answered. 

"  I  mean  the  hand — not  the  kiss,"  he  said 
smiling. 

"  You  really  are  sophisticated,"  she  told  him. 
"  Only  fancy  if  you  had  reversed  those  nouns !  " 

"  I  know,"  he  said;  "  but  I've  kissed  hands  be- 
fore. You  see,  I'm  more  talented  than  you  think." 

"  Don't  be  silly,"  she  said  smiling.  "  I  really 
am  beginning  to  think  very  well  of  you.  You  don't 
want  me  to  cease  to,  do  you?  " 


258    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Why  do  women  always  say  '  Don't  be 
silly'?"  he  queried.  "I  wish  I  could  find  one 
who  wanted  to  be  very  original,  and  so  said,  '  Do 
be  silly 'Just  for  a  change." 

"  Dear  me,  if  women  were  to  beg  men  to  be  silly 
what  would  happen?"  Mrs.  Rosscott  exclaimed. 
'  The  majority  are  so  very  foolish  without  any 
special  egging  on." 

"  But  it  is  so  dreadfully  time-worn — that  one 
phrase." 

"  Oh,  if  it  comes  to  originality,"  she  answered, 
"  men  are  not  original,  either.  Whenever  they  lie 
down  in  the  shade,  they  always  begin  to  talk 
nonsense.  You  reflect  a  bit  and  see  if  that  isn't 
invariably  so." 

"  But  nonsense  is  such  fun  to  talk  in  the  shade," 
he  said,  spreading  her  fingers  out  upon  his  own 
broad  palm.  "  So  many  things  are  so  next  to 
heavenly  in  the  shade." 

"  You  ought  not  to  hold  my  hand." 

"  I  know  it." 

"  I  am  astonished  that  you  do  not  remember 
your  Aunt  Mary's  teaching  you  better." 

"  She  never  forbade  my  holding  your  hand." 

"  Suppose  anyone  should  come  suddenly  down 
the  path?" 

'  They  would  see  us  and  turn  and  go  back." 

"  To  tell  everyone " 


JACK'S   JOY  259 


;'What?" 
"  A  lie." 


Jack  laughed,  folded  her  hand  hard  in  his,  and 
drew  himself  into  a  sitting  posture  beside  her 
knee. 

"  Now,  don't  be  silly,"  she  said  with  earnest 
anxiety.  "  I  won't  have  it.  It's  putting  false  ideas 
in  your  head,  because  I'm  really  only  playing,  you 
know." 

"  The  shadow  of  love,"  he  suggested. 

"  Quite  so." 

"  And  if "     He  leaned  quite  near. 

"  Not  by  any  means,"  she  exclaimed,  springing 
quickly  to  her  feet.  "Come — come!  It's  quite 
time  that  we  were  going  back  to  the  house." 

"  Why  must  we?  "  he  remonstrated. 

"  You  know  why,"  she  said.  "  It's  time  we  were 
being  sensible.  When  a  man  gets  as  near  as  you 
are,  I  prefer  to  be  en  promenade.  And  don't  let  us 
be  foolish  any  longer,  either.  Let  us  be  cool  and 
worldly.  How  much  money  has  your  aunt,  any- 
how? " 

Jack  had  risen,  too. 

"  What  impertinence!  "  he  ejaculated. 

"  Not  at  all,"  she  said.  "  Maude  has  so  much 
money  of  her  ow!n  that  I  ask  in  a  wholly  disin- 
terested spirit." 

"  She's  very  rich,"  said  Jack.     "  But  if  your 


260    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

spirit  is  so  disinterested,  what  do  you  want  to  know 
for?" 

"  This  is  a  world  of  chance,  and  the  main  chance 
in  a  woman's  case  is  alimony;  so  it's  always  nice  to 
know  how  to  figure  it." 

"  It's  a  slim  chance  for  your  cousin,"  said  Jack. 
"  Do  tell  her  that  I  said  so." 

"  No,  I  shan't,"  said  she  perversely.  "  I  won't 
be  a  go-between  for  you  and  her.  Besides,  as  to 
that  alimony,  there  are  more  heiresses  than  Maude 
in  our  family." 

"  Yes,"  said  he;  "I  know  that.  But  I  know, 
too,  that  there  is  one  among  them  who  need  never 
figure  on  getting  any  alimony  out  of  me.  If  I  ever 
get  the  iron  grasp  of  the  law  on  that  heiress,  I  can 
assure  you  that  only  her  death  or  mine  will  ever 
loosen  its  fangs." 

"  How  fierce  you  are !  "  said  Mrs.  Rosscott. 
"  Why  do  you  get  so  worked  up?  " 

"  Oh,"  he  exclaimed,  with  something  approach- 
ing a  groan,  "  I  don't  mean  to  be — but  I  do  care 

so  much!  And  sometimes "  he  caught  her 

quickly  in  his  arms,  drew  her  within  their  strong 
embrace,  and  kissed  her  passionately  upon  the  lips 
that  had  been  tantalizing  him  for  five  interminable 
months. 

He  was  almost  frightened  the  next  second  by  her 
Stillness, 


JACK'S   JOY  261 

"  Don't  be  angry,"  he  pleaded. 

"  I'm  not,"  she  murmured,  resting  very  quietly 
with  her  cheek  against  his  heart.  "  But  you'll  have 
to  marry  me  now.  My  other  husband  did,  you 
know." 

"  Marry  you!  "  he  exclaimed.  "  Next  week? 
To-morrow?  This  afternoon?  You  need  only 
say  when " 

"  Oh,  not  for  years  and  years,"  she  said,  inter- 
rupting him.  "  You  mustn't  dream  of  such  a  thing 
for  years  and  years !  " 

"  For  years  and  years !  "  he  cried  in  astonish- 
ment. 

"  That's  what  I  said,"  she  told  him. 

He  released  her  in  his  surprise  and  stared  hard  at 
her.  And  then  he  seized  her  again  and  kissed  her 
soundly. 

"  You  don't  mean  it !  "  he  declared. 

"  I  do  mean  it !  "  she  declared. 

And  then  she  shook  her  head  in  a  very  sweet  but 
painfully  resolute  manner. 

"  I  won't  be  called  a  cradle-robber,"  she  said, 
firmly;  and  at  that  her  companion  swore  mildly  but 
fervently. 

'  You're  so  young,"  she  said  further;  "  and  not 
a  bit  settled,"  she  added. 

"  But  you're  young,  too,"  he  reminded  her. 

"  I'm  older  than  you  are,"  she  said. 


262    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  I  suppose  that  you  aren't  any  more  settled  than 
I  am,  and  that's  why  you  hesitate,"  he  said  grimly. 

"  Now  that's  unworthy  of  you,"  she  cried;  "  and 
I  have  a  good  mind " 

But  the  direful  words  were  never  spoken,  for  she 
was  in  his  arms  again — close  in  his  arms;  and,  as 
he  kissed  her  with  a  delicious  sensation  that  it  was 
all  too  good  to  be  true,  he  whispered,  laughing : 

"  I  always  meant  to  lord  it  over  my  wife,  so  I'll 
begin  by  saying :  *  Have  it  your  own  way,  as  long 
as  I  have  you. ' 

Mrs.  Rosscott  laid  her  cheek  back  against  his 
coat  lapel,  and  looked  up  into  his  eyes  with  the 
sweetest  smile  that  even  he  had  ever  seen  upon  even 
her  face. 

"  It's  a  bargain,"  she  murmured. 


Chapter  Twenty-One 

THE  PEACE  AND  QUIET  OF  THE  COUNTRY 

AONG  in  the  beginning  of  the  fall  Aunt 
Mary  began  suddenly  to  grow  very  feeble 
indeed.  After  the  first  week  or  two  it  be- 
came apparent  that  she  would  have  to  be  quiet  and 
very  prudent  for  some  time,  and  it  was  when  this 
information  was  imparted  to  her  that  the  family 
discovered  that  she  had  been  intending  to  go  to 
New  York  for  the  Horse-Show. 

"  She's  awful  mad,"  Lucinda  said  to  Joshua. 
'  The  doctor  says  she'll  have  to  stay  in  bed." 

"  She  won't  stay  in  bed  long,"  said  Joshua. 

'  The  doctor  says  if  she  don't  stay  in  bed  she'll 
die,"  said  Lucinda. 

"  She  won't  die,"  said  Joshua. 

Lucinda  looked  at  Joshua  and  felt  a  keen  desire 
to  throw  her  flatiron  at  him.  The  world  always 
thinks  that  the  Lucindas  have  no  feelings;  the 
world  never  knows  how  near  the  flatirons  come  to 
the  Joshuas  often  and  often. 

Arethusa  came  for  two  days  and  looked  the 
situation  well  over. 

"  I  think  I  won't  stay,"  she  said  to  Lucinda, 
263 


264    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  but  you  must  write  me  twice  a  week  and  I'll  write 
the  others." 

Then  Arethusa  departed  and  Lucinda  remained 
alone  to  superintend  things  and  be  superintended 
by  Aunt  Mary. 

Aunt  Mary's  superintendence  waxed  extremely 
vigorous  almost  at  once.  She  had  out  her  writing 
desk,  and  wrote  Jack  a  letter,  as  a  consequence  of 
which  everything  published  in  New  York  was 
mailed  to  his  aunt  as  soon  as  it  was  off  the  presses. 
Lucinda  was  set  reading  aloud  and,  except  when 
the  mail  came,  was  hardly  allowed  to  halt  for  food 
and  sleep. 

"  My  heavens  above,"  said  the  slave  to 
Joshua,  "it  don't  seem  like  I  can  live  with  her!  " 

"  You'll  live  with  her,"  said  Joshua. 

"  It's  more  as  flesh  and  blood  can  bear." 

"  Flesh  and  blood  can  bear  a  good  deal  more'n 
you  think  for,"  said  Joshua,  and  then  he  delivered 
up  two  letters  and  drove  off  toward  the  barn. 

"  If  those  are  letters,"  said  Aunt  Mary  from  her 
pillow  the  instant  she  heard  the  front  door  close, 
"  I'd  like  'em.  I'm  a  great  believer  in  readin'  my 
own  mail,  an'  another  time,  Lucinda,  I'll  thank  you 
to  bring  it  as  soon  as  you  get  it  an'  not  stand  out  on 
the  porch  hollyhockin'  with  Joshua  for  half  an 
hour  while  I  wait." 

Lucinda   delivered  up  the  letters  without  de- 


QUIET   OF   THE    COUNTRY          265 

manding  what  species  of  conversational  signifi- 
cance her  mistress  attached  to  the  phrase,  "  holly- 
hocking." 

Aunt  Mary  turned  the  letters  through  eagerly. 

"My  lands  alive!"  she  said  suddenly,  "if 
here  isn't  one  from  Mitchell, — the  dear  boy. 
Well,  I  never  did! — Lucinda,  open  the  blinds  to 
the  other  window,  too — so  I — can — see  to — "  her 
voice  died  away, — she  was  too  deep  in  the  letter  to 
recollect  what  she  was  saying. 

Mitchell  wrote: 

MY  DEAR  Miss  WATKINS  : — 

We  are  sitting  in  a  row  with  ashes  on  the  heads 
of  our  cigarettes  mourning,  mourning,  mourning, 
because  we  have  had  the  news  that  you  are  ill.  As 
usual  it  is  up  to  me  to  express  our  feelings,  so  I  have 
decided  to  mail  them  and  the  others  agree  to  pay 
for  the  ink. 

I  wish  to  remark  at  once  that  we  did  not  sleep  any 
last  night.  Jack  told  us  at  dinner,  and  we  spent  the 
evening  making  a  melancholy  tour  of  places  where 
we  had  been  with  you.  If  you  had  only  been  with 
us!  The  roof  gardens  are  particularly  desolate 
without  you.  The  whole  of  the  city  seems  to  real- 
ize it.  The  watering  carts  weep  from  dawn  to 
dark.  All  the  lamp-posts  are  wearing  black.  It 
is  sad  at  one  extreme  and  sadder  at  the  other. 

You  must  brace  up.  If  you  can't  do  that  try  a 
belt.  Life  is  too  short  to  spend  in  bed.  My 
motto  has  always  been  "  Spend  freely  everywhere 
else."  At  present  I  recommend  anything  calcu- 
lated to  mend  you.  I  may  in  all  modesty  mention 


266    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

that  just  before  Christmas  I  shall  be  traveling 
north  and  shall  then  adore  to  stop  and  cheer  you 
up  a  bit  if  you  invite  me.  I  have  made  it  an 
invariable  rule,  however,  not  to  stay  over  night 
anywhere  when  I  am  not  invited,  so  I  hope  you  will 
consider  my  feelings  and  send  me  an  invitation. 

My  eyes  fill  as  I  think  what  it  will  be  to  sit 
beside  you  and  recall  dear  old  New  York.  It  will 
be  the  next  best  thing  to  being  run  over  by  an  auto- 
mobile, won't  it? 

Yours,  with  fondest  recollections, 

HERBERT  KENDRICK  MITCHELL. 

Aunt  Mary  laid  the  letter  down. 

"  Lucinda,"  she  said  in  a  curiously  veiled  tone, 
"  give  me  a  handkerchief — a  big  one.  As  big  a 
one  as  I've  got." 

Lucinda  did  as  requested. 

"  Now,  go  away,"  said  Aunt  Mary. 

Lucinda  went  away.  She  went  straight  to 
Joshua. 

"  She's  had  a  letter  an'  read  it  an'  it's  made  her 
cry,"  she  said. 

"  That's  better'n  if  it  made  her  mad,"  said 
Joshua,  who  was  warming  his  hands  at  the  stove. 

"  I  ain't  sure  that  it  won't  make  her  mad  later," 
said  Lucinda.  "  Say,  but  she  is  a  Tartar  since  she 
came  back.  Seems  some  days  's  if  I  couldn't 
live." 

"  You'll  live,"  said  Joshua,  and,  as  his  hands 
were  now  well-warmed,  he  went  out  again. 


QUIET   OF   THE   COUNTRY          267 

After  a  while  Aunt  Mary's  bell  jangled  violently 
and  Lucinda  had  to  hurry  back. 

"  Lucinda,  did  the  doctor  say  anythin'  to  you 
about  how  long  he  thought  I  might  be  sick?  " 

"  Yes,  he  did." 

"  What  did  he  say?  I  want  to  know  jus'  what 
he  said.  Speak  up!  " 

"  He  said  he  didn't  have  no  idea  how  long  you'd 
be  sick." 

Aunt  Mary  threw  a  look  at  Lucinda  that  ought 
to  have  annihilated  her. 

"  I  want  to  see  Jack,"  she  said.  "  Bring  my 
writin'  desk.  Right  off.  Quick." 

She  wrote  to  Jack,  and  he  came  up  and  spent  the 
next  Sunday  with  her,  cheering  her  mightily. 

"  I  wish  the  others  could  have  come,  too,"  she 
said  once  an  hour  all  through  his  visit.  Mitchell's 
letter  seemed  to  have  bred  a  tremendous  longing 
within  her. 

"  They'll  come  later,"  said  Jack,  with  hearty 
good-will.  "  They  all  want  to  come." 

"  I  don't  know  how  we  could  ever  have  any  fun 
up  here  though,"  said  his  aunt  sadly.  "  My 
heavens  alive,  Jack, — but  this  is  an  awful  place  to 
live  in.  And  to  think  that  I  lived  to  be  seventy 
before  I  found  it  out." 

Jack  took  her  hand  and  kissed  it.  He  did  sym- 
pathize, even  if  he  was  only  twenty-two  and  longing 


268    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

unutterably  to  be  somewhere  else  and  kissing  some- 
one else  at  that  very  minute. 

"  Mitchell  wrote  me  a  letter,"  continued  Aunt 
Mary.  "  He  said  he  was  comin'.  Well,  dear  me, 
he  can  eat  mince  pie  and  drive  with  Joshua  when 
he  goes  for  the  mail,  but  I  don't  know  what  else  I 
can  do  with  him.  Oh,  if  I'd  only  been  born  in  the 
city!" 

Jack  kissed  her  hand  again.  He  didn't  know 
what  to  say.  Aunt  Mary's  lot  seemed  to  border 
upon  the  tragic  just  then  and  there. 

The  next  day  he  returned  to  town  and  Lucinda 
came  on  duty  again.  She  soon  found  that  the 
nephew's  visit  had  rendered  the  aunt  harder  than 
ever  to  get  along  with." 

"  I'm  goin'  to  town  jus'  's  soon  as  ever  I  feel  well 
enough,"  she  declared  aggressively  on  more  than 
one  occasion.  "  An'  nex'  time  I  go  I'm  goin'  to 
stay  jus'  's  long  as  ever  I'm  havin'  a  good  time. 
Now,  don't  contradict  me,  Lucinda,  because  it's 
your  place  to  hold  your  tongue.  I'm  a  great  be- 
liever in  your  holding  your  tongue,  Lucinda." 

Lucinda,  who  certainly  never  felt  the  slightest 
inclination  toward  contradiction,  held  her  tongue, 
and  the  poor,  unhappy  one  twisted  about  in  bed, 
and  bemoaned  the  quietude  of  her  environment  by 
the  hour  at  a  time. 

"  Did  you  say  we  had  a  calf?  "  she  asked   sud- 


QUIET   OF   THE    COUNTRY  269 

denly  one  day.  "Well,  why  don't  you  answer? 
When  I  ask  a  question  I  expect  an  answer.  Didn't 
you  say  we  had  a  calf?  " 

Lucinda  nodded. 

"  Well,  I  want  Joshua  to  take  that  calf  to  the 
blacksmith  and  have  him  shod  behind  an'  before 
right  off.  To-day — this  minute." 

"  You  want  the  calf  shod!  "  cried  Lucinda,  sud- 
denly alarmed  by  the  fear  lest  her  mistress  had  gone 
light-headed. 

Aunt  Mary  glared  in  a  way  that  showed  that 
she  was  far  from  being  out  of  her  usual  mind. 

"  If  I  said  shod,  I  guess  I  meant  shod,"  she  said, 
icily.  "  I  do  sometimes  mean  what  I  say.  Pretty 
often — as  a  usual  thing." 

Lucinda  stood  at  the  foot  of  the  bed,  petrified 
and  paralyzed. 

Then  the  invalid  sat  up  a  little  and  showed  some 
mercy  on  her  servant's  very  evident  fright. 

"  I  want  the  calf  shod,"  she  explained,  "  so's 
Joshua  can  run  up  an'  down  the  porch  with  him." 

So  far  from  ameliorating  Lucinda's  condition, 
this  explanation  rendered  it  visibly  worse.  Aunt 
Mary  contemplated  her  in  silence  for  a  few  seconds, 
and  she  suddenly  cried  out,  in  a  tone  that  was  full 
of  pathos: 

"  I  feel  like  maybe — maybe — the  calf '11  make 
me  think  it's  horses'  feet  on  the  pavement." 


270    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Lucinda  rushed  from  the  room. 

"  She  wants  the  calf  shod !  "  she  cried,  bursting 
in  upon  Joshua,  who  was  piling  wood. 

For  once  in  his  life  Joshua  was  shaken  out  of 
his  usual  placidity. 

"  She  wants  the  calf  shod  I  "  he  repeated  blankly. 

"  Yes." 

"  You  can't  shoe  a  calf." 

"  But  she  wants  it  done." 

Joshua  regained  his  self-control. 

"  Oh,  well,"  he  said,  turning  to  go  on  with  his 
work,  "  the  calf's  gone  to  the  butcher,  anyhow. 
Tell  her  so." 

Lucinda  went  back  to  Aunt  Mary. 

"  The  calf's  gone  to  the  butcher,"  she  yelled. 

Aunt  Mary  frowned  heavily. 

"  Then  you  go  an'  get  a  lamp  and  turn  it  up  too 
high  an'  leave  it,"  she  said, — "  the  smell'll  make 
me  think  of  automobiles." 

Lucinda  was  appalled.  As  a  practical  house- 
keeper she  felt  that  here  was  a  proposition  which 
she  could  not  face. 

"  Well,  ain't  you  goin'  ?  "  Aunt  Mary  asked 
tartly.  "  Of  course  if  you  ain't  intendin'  to  go  I'd 
be  glad  to  know  it;  'n  while  you're  gone, 
Lucinda,  I  wish  you'd  get  me  the  handle  to  the  ice 
cream  freezer  an'  lay  it  where  I  can  see  it ;  it'll  help 
me  believe  in  the  smell." 


QUIET   OF   THE    COUNTRY  271 

Lucinda  went  away  and  brought  the  handle,  but 
she  did  not  light  the  lamp.  The  Fates  were  good 
to  her,  though,  for  Aunt  Mary  forgot  the  lamp  in 
her  disgust  over  the  appearance  of  the  handle. 

"  Take  it  away,"  she  said  sharply.  "  Anybody' d 
know  it  wasn't  an  automobile  crank.  I  don't  want 
to  look  like  a  fool !  Well,  why  ain't  you  takin'  it 
away,  Lucinda  ?  " 

Lucinda  took  the  crank  back  to  the  freezer; 
but  as  the  days  passed  on,  the  situation  grew 
worse.  Aunt  Mary  slept  more  and  more,  and 
awoke  to  an  ever-increasing  ratio  of  belligerency. 

Before  long  Lucinda's  third  cousin  demanded 
her  assistance  in  "  moving,"  and  there  was  nothing 
for  poor  Arethusa  to  do  but  to  take  up  the  burden, 
now  become  a  fearfully  heavy  one. 

Aunt  Mary  was  getting  to  that  period  in  life 
when  the  nearer  the  relative  the  greater  the  dis- 
like, so  that  when  her  niece  arrived  the  welcome 
which  awaited  her  was  even  less  cordial  than  ever. 

"  Did  you  bring  a  trunk?  "  she  asked. 

"  A  small  one,"  replied  the  visitor. 
'  That's  something  to  be  grateful  for,"  said 
the  aunt.     "  If  I'd  invited  you  to  visit  me,  of 
course  I'd  feel  differently  about  things." 

Arethusa  accepted  this  as  she  accepted  all 
things,  unpacked,  saw  Lucinda  off,  assumed  charge 
of  the  house,  and  then  dragged  a  rocking  chair  to 


272    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

her  aunt's  bedside  and  unfolded  her  sewing.  Ere 
she  had  threaded  her  needle  Aunt  Mary  was 
sound  asleep,  and  so  her  niece  sewed  placidly  for  an 
hour  or  more,  until,  like  lightning  out  of  a  clear 
sky: 

"Arethusa!" 

The  owner  of  the  name  started — but  answered 
immediately : 

"  Yes,  Aunt  Mary." 

"  When  I  die  I  want  to  be  buried  from  a  roof 
garden!  Don't  you  forget!  You'd  better  go 
an'  write  it  down.  Go  now — go  this  minute !  " 

Arethusa  shook  as  if  with  the  discharge  of  a 
contiguous  field  battery.  She  had  not  had  Lucin- 
da's  gradual  breaking-in  to  her  aunt's  new  trains 
of  thought. 

"  Aunt  Mary,"  she  said  feebly  at  last. 

Aunt  Mary  saw  her  lips  moving;  she  sat  up  in 
bed  and  her  eyes  flashed  cinders. 

"  Well,  ain't  you  goin'?  "she  asked  wrathfully. 
"When  I  say  do  a  thing,  can't  it  be  done?  I 
declare  it's  bad  enough  to  live  with  a  pack  of 
idiots  without  havin'  'em,  one  an'  all,  act  as  if  I 
was  the  idiot!  " 

Arethusa  laid  aside  her  work  and  rose  to  quit 
the  room.  She  returned  five  minutes  later  with 
pen  and  ink,  but  Aunt  Mary  was  now  off  on 
another  tack. 


QUIET   OF   THE    COUNTRY  273 

"I  want  a  bulldog!"  she  cried    imperatively. 

"  A  bulldog !  "  shrieked  her  niece,  nearly  drop- 
ping what  she  held  in  her  hands.  "  What  do  you 
want  a  bulldog  for?  " 

"  Not  a  bullfrog!  "  the  old  lady  corrected;  "  a 
bulldog.  Oh,  I  do  get  so  sick  of  your  stupidity, 
Arethusa,"  she  said.  "  What  should  I  or  any 
one  else  want  of  a  bullfrog?  " 

Arethusa  sighed,  and  the  sigh  was  apparent. 

"  I'd  sigh  if  I  was  you,"  said  her  aunt.  "  I  cer- 
tainly would.  If  I  was  you,  Arethusa,  I'd  cer- 
tainly feel  that  I  had  cause  to  sigh;  "  and  with  that 
she  sat  up  and  gave  her  pillow  a  punch  that  was 
full  of  the  direst  sort  of  suggestion. 

Arethusa  did  not  gainsay  the  truth  of  the  sigh- 
ing proposition.  It  was  too  apparent. 

The  next  day  Aunt  Mary  slept  until  noon,  and 
then  opened  her  eyes  and  simultaneously  declared: 

"  Next  summer  I'm  goin'  to  have  an  automo- 
bile!" 

Then  she  looked  about  and  saw  that  she  had 
addressed  the  air,  which  made  her  more  mad  than 
ever.  She  rang  her  bell  violently,  and  Arethusa 
left  the  lunch  table  so  hastily  that  she  reached  the 
bedroom  half-choked. 

"  Next  summer  I'm  goin'  to  have  an  automo- 
bile," said  the  old  lady  angrily.  "  Now,  get  me 
some  breakfast." 


274    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Her  niece  went  out  quickly,  and  a  maid  was 
sent  in  with  tea  and  toast  and  eggs  at  once.  Their 
effect  was  to  brace  the  invalid  up  and  make  the  lot 
of  those  about  her  yet  more  wearing. 

"  I  shall  run  it  myself,"  she  vowed,  when  Are- 
thusa  returned;  "an'  I  bet  they  clear  out  when 
they  see  me  comin'." 

It  did  seem  highly  probable. 

"  I  don't  know  how  I  can  live  if  I  don't  get 
away  from  here  soon,"  she  declared  a  few  minutes 
later.  "  You  don't  appreciate  what  life  is,  Are- 
thusa.  Seems  like  I'll  go  mad  with  wantin'  to  be 
somewhere  else.  I  can  see  Jack  gets  his  disposi- 
tion straight  from  me." 

There  was  a  sigh  and  a  pause. 

"  I  shall  die,"  Aunt  Mary  then  declared  with 
violence,  "  if  I  don't  have  a  change.  Arethusa, 
you've  got  to  write  to  Jack,  and  tell  him  to  get 
me  Granite." 

"  Granite !  "  screamed  the  niece  in  surprise. 

"  Yes,  Granite.  She  was  a  maid  I  had  in 
New  York.  I  want  her  to  come  here.  She  must 
come.  Tell  him  to  offer  her  anything,  and  send 
her  C.  O.  D.  If  I  can  have  Granite,  maybe  I'll 
feel  some  better.  You  write  Jack." 

11  I'll  write  to-night,"  shrieked  Arethusa. 

"No,  you  won't,"  said  Aunt  Mary;  "you'll 
get  the  ink  and  write  right  now.  Because  I've 


QUIET   OF   THE    COUNTRY          275 

been  meeker'n  Moses  all  my  life  is  no  reason  why 
I  sh'd  be  willin'  to  be  downtrodden  clear  to  the 
end.  Folks  around  me'd  better  begin  to  look 
sharp  an'  step  lively  from  now  on." 

Arethusa  went  to  the  desk  at  once  and  wrote : 

DEAR  JACK: 

Aunt  Mary  wants  the  maid  that  she  had  when 
she  was  in  New  York.  For  the  love  of  Heaven, 
if  the  girl  is  procurable,  do  get  her.  Hire  her  if 
you  can  and  kidnap  her  if  you  can't.  Lucinda  has 
played  her  usual  trick  on  me  and  walked  off  just 
when  she  felt  like  it.  I  never  saw  Aunt  Mary  in 
anything  like  the  state  of  mind  that  she  is,  but  I 
know  one  thing — if  you  cannot  send  the  maid, 
there'll  be  an  end  of  me. 

Your  loving  sister, 

ARETHUSA. 

Jack  was  much  perturbed  upon  receipt  of  this 
letter.  He  whistled  a  little  and  frowned  a  great 
deal.  But  at  last  he  decided  to  be  frank  and  tell 
the  truth  to  Mrs.  Rosscott.  To  that  end  he  wrote 
her  a  lengthy  note.  After  two  preliminary  pages 
so  personal  that  it  would  not  be  right  to  print  them 
for  public  reading,  he  continued  thus: 

I've  had  a  letter  from  my  sister,  who  is  with 
Aunt  Mary  at  present.  She  says  that  Aunt  Mary 
is  not  at  all  well  and  declares  that  she  must  have 
Janice.  What  under  the  sun  am  I  to  answer? 
Shall  I  say  that  the  girl  has  gone  to  France?  I'm 
willing  to  swear  anything  rather  that  put  you  to 


276    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

one  second's  inconvenience.  You  know  that,  don't 
you?  etc.,  etc.,  etc.  [just  here  the  letter  abruptly 
became  personal  again]. 

Jack  thought  that  he  knew  his  fiancee  well,  but 
he  was  totally  unprepared  for  such  an  exhibition 
of  sweetness  as  was  testified  to  by  the  letter  which 
he  received  in  return. 

It's  first  six  pages  were  even  more  personal  than 
his  own  (being  more  feminine)  and  then  came  this 
paragraph : 

Janice  is  going  to  your  aunt  by  to-night's  train. 
Now,  don't  say  a  word!  It  is  nothing — nothing 
— absolutely  nothing.  Don't  you  know  that  I  am 
too  utterly  happy  to  be  able  to  do  anything  for  any- 
one that  you etc.,  etc.,  etc. 

Jack  seized  his  hat  and  hurried  to  where  his 
lady-love  was  just  then  residing.  But  Janice  had 
gone! 


Chapter  Twenty-Two 

"  GRANITE  " 

JOSHUA  was  despatched  to  drive  through 
mud  and  rain  to  bring  Aunt  Mary's  solace 
from  the  station. 

Aunt  Mary  had  herself  propped  up  in  bed  to  be 
ready  for  the  return  before  Billy's  feet  had  ceased 
to  cry  splash  on  the  road  outside  of  the  gate.  Her 
eagerness  tinged  her  pallor  pink.  It  was  as  if  the 
prospect  of  seeing  Janice  gave  her  some  of  that 
flood  of  vitality  which  always  seems  to  ebb  and 
flow  so  richly  in  the  life  of  a  metropolis. 

"  My  gracious  heavens,  Lucinda  "  (for  Lucinda 
was  back  now) ,  she  said  joyfully,  "  to  think  that  I 
needn't  look  at  you  for  a  week  if  I  don't  want  to  ! 
You  haven't  any  idea  how  tired  I  am  of  looking  at 
you,  Lucinda.  If  you  looked  like  anything  it  would 
be  different.  But  you  don't." 

Lucinda  rocked  placidly;  hers  was  what  is  called 
an  "even  disposition."  If  it  hadn't  been,  she 
might  have  led  an  entirely  different  life — in  fact, 
she  would  most  certainly  have  lived  somewhere 
else,  for  she  couldn't  possibly  have  lived  with  Aunt 
Mary. 

277 


278    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT  MARY 

The  hour  that  ensued  after  Joshua's  departure 
was  so  long  that  it  resulted  in  a  nap  for  the  invalid, 
and  Lucinda  had  to  wake  her  by  slamming  the 
closet  door  when  the  arrival  turned  in  at  the 
gate. 

"  Has  he  got  her?  "  Aunt  Mary  cried  breath- 
lessly. "Has  he  got  someone  with  him?  Run, 
Lucinda,  an'  bring  her  in.  She  needn't  wipe  her 
feet,  tell  her;  you  can  brush  the  hall  afterwards. 
Well,  why  ain't  you  hurryin'  ?  " 

Lucinda  was  hurrying,  her  curiosity  being  as 
potent  as  the  commands  of  her  mistress,  and  five 
seconds  later  Janice  appeared  in  the  door  with  her 
predecessor  just  behind  her — a  striking  contrast. 

"  You  dear  blessed  Granite !  "  cried  the  old  lady, 
stretching  out  her  hands  in  a  sort  of  ecstasy.  "  Oh, 
my !  but  I'm  glad  to  see  you !  Come  right  straight 
here.  No,  shut  the  door  first.  Lucinda,  you  go 
and  do  'most,  any  thing.  An'  how  is  the  city?  " 

Janice  came  to  the  bedside  and  dropped  on  her 
knees  there,  taking  Aunt  Mary's  withered  hand 
close  in  both  of  her  own. 

"  You  didn't  shut  the  door,"  the  old  lady  whis- 
pered hoarsely.  "  I  wish  you  would — an'  bolt  it, 
too.  An'  then  come  straight  back  to  me." 

Janice  closed  and  bolted  the  door,  and  returned 
to  the  bedside.  Aunt  Mary  drew  her  down  close 
to  her,  and  her  voice  and  eyes  were  hungry,  indeed. 


"GRANITE"  £79 

For  a  little  she  looked  eagerly  upon  what  she  had 
so  craved  to  possess  again,  and  then  she  suddenly 
asked : 

"  Granite,  have  you  got  any  cigarettes  with 
you?" 

The  maid  started  a  little. 

"  Do  you  smoke  now?  "  she  asked,  with  interest. 

"  No,"  said  Aunt  Mary  sadly,  "  an'  that's  one 
more  of  my  awful  troubles.  You  see  I'm  jus'  achin' 
to  smell  smoke,  an'  Joshua  promised  his  mother 
the  night  before  he  was  twenty-one.  You  don't 
know  nothin'  about  how  terrible  I  feel.  I'm  empty 
somewhere  jus'  all  the  time.  Don't  you  believe  't 
you  could  get  some  cigarettes  an'  smoke  'em  right 
close  to  me,  an'  let  me  lay  here,  an'  be  so  happy 
while  I  smell.  I'll  have  a  good  doctor  for  you, 
if  you're  sick  from  it." 

The  maid  reflected;  then  she  nodded. 

"  I'll  write  to  town,"  she  cried,  in  her  high,  clear 
tones.  "  What  brand  do  you  like  best?  " 

"  Mitchell's,"  said  Aunt  Mary.  "  But  you  can't 
get  those  because  he  made  'em  himself  an'  sealed 
'em  with  a  lick.  Oh!  "  she  sighed,  with  the  accent 
of  a  starving  Sybarite,  "  I  do  wish  I  could  see  him 
do  it  again !  Do  you  know,"  she  added  suddenly, 
"  he  wrote  me  a  letter  and  he's  goin'  to  come  here." 

''  When?  "  asked  Janice. 

"  After  a  while.     But  you  must  take  off  your 


280    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

things.  That's  your  room  in  there,"  pointing 
toward  a  half-open  door  at  the  side.  "  I  wanted 
you  as  close  as  I  could  get  you.  My,  but  I've 
wanted  you!  I  can't  tell  you  how  much.  But  a 
good  deal- — a  lot — awfully." 

Janice  went  into  the  room  that  was  to  be  hers, 
and  hung  up  her  hat  and  cloak. 

When  she  returned  Aunt  Mary  was  looking  a 
hundred  per  cent,  improved  already. 

"  Can  you  hum  '  Hiawatha'  ?  "  she  asked  im- 
mediately. "  Granite,  I  must  have  suthin'  to  amuse 
me  an'  make  me  feel  good.  Can  you  hum  '  Hia- 
watha '  an'  can  you  do  that  kind  of  '  sh — sh — sh — ' 
that  everybody  does  all  together  at  the  end,  you 
know?" 

Janice  smiled  pleasantly,  and  placing  herself  in 
the  closest  possible  proximity  with  the  ear  trumpet, 
at  once  rendered  the  desired  morceau  in  a  style 
which  would  have  done  credit  to  a  soloist  in  a  cafe 
chantant. 

Aunt  Mary's  lips  wreathed  in  seraphic  bliss. 

"  My!  "  she  said.  "  I  feel  just  as  if  I  was  back 
eatin'  crabs'  legs  and  tails  again.  No  one'll  ever 
know  how  I've  missed  city  life  this  winter  but — 
well,  you  saw  Lucinda !  " 

The  glance  that  accompanied  the  speech  was 
mysterious  but  significant.  Janice  nodded  sym- 
pathetically. 


"GRANITE"  281 

"  I  hope  you  brought  a  trunk.  I  ain't  a  bit  sure 
when  I'll  be  able  to  let  you  go,"  pursued  the  old 
lady.  "  I  don't  believe  I  can  let  you  go  until  I  go, 
too.  I've  most  died  here  alone." 

"  I  brought  a  trunk,"  Janice  cried  into  the  ear 
trumpet. 

"  I'm  glad,"  said  Aunt  Mary.  She  paused,  and 
her  eyes  grew  wistful. 

"  Granite,"  she  asked,  "  do  you  think  you  could 
manage  to  do  a  skirt  dance  on  the  footboard?  I'm 
'most  wild  to  see  some  lace  shake." 

Janice  looked  doubtfully  at  the  footboard.  It 
was  wide  for  a  footboard,  but  narrow — too  nar- 
row— for  a  skirt  dance. 

"  But  I  can  do  one  on  the  floor,"  she  cried. 

Aunt  Mary's  features  became  suffused  with 
heavenly  joy. 

"  Oh,  Granite  1  "  she  murmured,  in  accents  of 
greatest  anticipation. 

The  maid  stood  up,  and,  going  off  as  far  as  the 
limits  of  the  spacious  bedroom  would  allow,  exe- 
cuted a  most  fetching  and  dainty  pas  seul  to  a  tune 
of  her  own  humming. 

"  Give  me  suthin'  to  pound  with  1  "  cried  her 
enthusiastic  audience.  "  Oh,  Granite,  I  ain't 
been  so  happy  since  I  was  home !  Whatever  you 
want  you  can  have,  only  don't  ever  leave  me  alone 
with  Lucinda  again." 


282    REJUVENATION   OF  AUNT   MARY 

Janice  was  catching  her  tired  breath,  but  she 
answered  with  a  smile. 

"  Can't  you  get  my  Sunday  umbrella  out  of  the 
closet  now  an'  do  a  parasol  dance?  "  the  insatiate 
demanded;  "  one  of  those  where  you  shoot  it  open 
an'  shut  when  people  ain't  expectin'." 

The  maid  went  to  the  closet  and  brought  out  the 
Sunday  umbrella;  but  its  shiny  black  silk  did  not 
appear  to  inspire  any  fluffy  maneuvres,  so  she  util- 
ized it  in  the  guise  of  a  broadsword  and  did  some- 
thing that  savored  of  the  Highlands,  and  seemed 
to  rebel  bitterly  at  the  length  of  her  skirt.  Aunt 
Mary  writhed  around  in  bliss — utter  and  intense. 

"  I  feel  like  I  was  livin'  again,"  she  said,  heav- 
ing a  great  sigh  of  content.  "  I  tell  you  I've  suf- 
fered enough,  since  I  came  back,  to  know  what  it 
is  to  have  some  fun  again.  Now,  Granite,  I'll  tell 
you  what  we'll  do,"  when  the  girl  sat  down  to  rest; 
"  you  write  for  those  cigarettes  while  I  take  a  little 
nap  and  afterwards  we'll  get  the  Universal  Knowl- 
edge book  and  learn  how  to  play  poker.  You  don't 
know  how  to  play  poker,  do  you  ?  " 

"  A  little,"  cried  the  maid. 

"  Well,  I  want  to  learn  how,"  said  the  old  lady, 
"  an'  we'll  learn  when — when  I  wake  up." 

Janice  nodded  assent. 

"  Excuse  me  shuttin'  my  eyes,"  said  Aunt 
Mary — and  she  was  asleep  in  two  minutes. 


Chapter  Twenty-Three 

"  GRANITE  " — CONTINUED. 

MARY  and  Arethusa — Aunt  Mary's  two 
nieces — were  not  uncommonly  merce- 
nary; but  about  three  weeks  after  the  new 
arrival  they  became  seriously  troubled  over  the 
ascendancy  that  she  appeared  to  be  gaining  over 
the  mind  of  their  aunt.  Lucinda's  duties  had  in- 
cluded for  many  years  the  writing  of  a  weekly  let- 
ter which  contained  formal  advices  of  the  general 
state  of  affairs,  and  after  Janice's  establishment, 
these  letters  became  so  provocative  of  gradually  in- 
creasing alarm  that  first  Mary,  and  then  Arethusa 
thought  it  advisable  to  make  the  journey  for  the 
purpose  of  investigating  the  affair  personally. 
They  found  the  new  maid  apparently  devoid 
of  evil  intent,  but  certainly  fast  becoming  abso- 
lutely indispensable  to  the  daily  happiness  of 
their  influential  relative.  Mary  feared  that  a 
codicil  for  five  thousand  dollars  would  be  the 
result;  but  Arethusa  felt,  with  a  sinking  heart, 
that  there  was  another  naught  going  on  to  the  sum, 
and  that,  unless  the  tide  turned,  the  end  might  not 
be  even  then. 

283 


284    REJUVENATION   OF  AUNT  MARY 

Aunt  Mary  was  so  cool  that  neither  niece  stayed 
long,  and  Lucinda's  letters  had  to  be  looked  to 
for  the  progress  of  events.  Lucinda's  letters  were 
frequent  and  not  at  all  reassuring.  After  the  sis- 
ters had  talked  them  over,  they  sent  them  on  to 
Jack. 

She  [thus  Lucinda  invariably  began]  is  the  same 
as  ever.  It's  cross  the  heart  and  bend  the  knee, 
an'  then  you  ain't  down  far  enough  to  suit  her. 
But  she's  gettin'  so  afraid  she'll  go  that  she's  wax 
in  her  hands.  It  would  scare  you.  She  won't 
let  her  out  of  her  sight  a  minute.  I  must  say  that 
whatever  she's  giving  her,  she  certainly  is  earning 
the  money,  for  she  works  her  harder  every  day. 
The  poor  thing  is  hopping  about,  or  singing,  or 
playing  cards,  from  dawn  to  dark,  and  unless  it's 
a  provision  in  her  will  I  can't  see  what  would  pay 
her  enough  for  working  so.  Lord  knows  I  con- 
sidered I  earned  my  wages  without  skipping  around 
with  my  legs  crossed  like  she  does,  and  she  has  no 
end  of  patience  too,  even  if  she  won't  ever  let  her 
take  a  walk.  She's  getting  as  pale  as  she  is  herself. 
Seems  like  something  should  be  done. 

Respectfully, 
L.  COOKE. 

Three  days  later  Lucinda  wrote  again : 

She  does  seem  to  be  getting  worse  and  worse. 
She  makes  her  sleep  on  a  sofa  beside  her,  and 
she  begins  to  look  dreadfully  worn  out.  I  do 
believe  she'll  kill  her,  before  she  dies  herself.  I 
told  her  so  to-day,  but  she  only  smiled.  It's  funny, 


"GRANITE"  285 

but  I  like  her  even  if  I  am  bolted  out  all  the  time. 
I  ain't  jealous,  and  I'm  glad  of  the  rest.  I  should 
think  her  throat  would  split  with  talking  so  much, 
but  she  certainly  does  hear  her  better  than  anyone 
else.  I  think  something  must  be  done,  though. 
She's  getting  as  crazy  as  she  is  herself.  They 
play  cards  and  call  each  other  "  aunty  "  for  two 
hours  at  a  stretch  some  days.  Respectfully, 

L.  COOKE. 

At  the  end  of  the  week  Lucinda  wrote  again : 

I  think  if  you  don't  come,  she  will  surely  die. 
She  is  very  feeble  herself,  but  that  don't  keep  her 
from  wearing  her  to  skin  and  bone.  She  keeps 
her  doing  tricks  from  morning  to  night.  Every 
minute  that  she  is  awake  she  keeps  her  jump- 
ing. It's  a  mercy  she  sleeps  so  much,  or  she 
wouldn't  get  any  sleep  at  all.  I  can't  do  nothing, 
but  I  can  see  something  has  got  to  be  done. 
She's  killing  her,  and  she's  getting  where  she  don't 
care  for  nobody  but  her,  and  if  she's  to  be  kept  in 
trim  to  keep  on  amusing  her  she'll  have  to  have 
some  rest  pretty  quick.  Respectfully, 

L.  COOKE. 

If  the  sisters  were  perturbed  by  the  general 
trend  of  these  epistles,  Jack  was  half  wild  over  the 
situation.  He  swore  vigorously  and  he  tramped 
up  and  down  his  room  nights  until  the  people  un- 
derneath put  it  in  their  prayers  that  his  woes  might 
suggest  suicide  as  speedily  as  possible.  In  vain  he 
wrote  to  Mrs.  Rosscott  to  restore  Janice  to  her 
proper  place  in  town ;  Mrs.  Rosscott  answered  that 


as  long  as  Aunt  Mary  desired  Janice  at  her  side, 
at  her  side  Janice  should  stay.  Jack  knew  his  lady 
well  enough  to  know  that  she  would  keep  her  word, 
and  although  he  longed  to  assert  his  authority  he 
was  man  enough  to  feel  that  he  had  better  wait 
now  and  settle  the  debt  after  marriage. 

Nevertheless  the  whole  affair  was  unbearably 
vexatious  and  at  last  he  felt  that  he  could  endure 
it  no  longer. 

"  I'm  a  fool,"  he  said,  in  a  spirit  of  annoyance 
that  came  so  close  to  anger  that  it  led  to  an  utter 
loss  of  patience.  "  I'll  take  the  train  for  Aunt 
Mary's  to-day,  and  straighten  out  that  mess  in 
short  order." 

It  was  Saturday,  and  he  arranged  to  leave  by 
the  noon  train.  He  laid  in  a  heavy  supply  of  bribes 
for  his  aged  relative  and  of  reading  matter  for 
himself,  and  went  to  the  station  with  a  heart 
divided  'twixt  many  different  emotions.  It  was 
an  unconscionably  long  ride,  but  he  did  get  there 
safely  about  ten  o'clock. 

It  was  a  pleasant  night — not  too  cold — even  sug- 
gestive of  some  lingering  Indian  summer  intentions 
on  the  part  of  Jack's  namesake.  The  young  man 
thought  that  he  would  walk  out  to  his  child- 
hood's home,  and  his  decision  was  aided  by  the 
discovery  that  there  was  no  other  way  to  get 
there. 


"GRANITE"  287 

So  he  took  his  suit-case  in  his  hand  and  set  off 
with  a  stride  that  covered  the  intervening  miles  in 
short  order  and  brought  him,  almost  before  he 
knew  it,  to  where  he  could  see  Lucinda's  light  in  the 
dining-room  and  her  pug-nosed  profile  outlined 
upon  the  drawn  shade.  Everyone  else  was  evi- 
dently abed,  and  as  he  looked,  she,  too,  arose  and 
took  up  the  lamp.  He  hurried  his  steps  so  that  she 
might  let  him  in  before  she  went  upstairs,  but  in 
the  same  instant  the  light  went  out  and  with  its 
withdrawal  he  perceived  a  little  figure  sitting  alone 
upon  the  doorstep. 

His  heart  gave  a  tremendous  leap — but  not  with 
fright — and  he  made  three  rapid  steps  and  spoke 
a  name. 

She  lifted  up  her  head.  Of  course  it  was  Janice, 
and  although  she  had  been  weeping,  her  eyes  were 
as  beautiful  as  ever. 

"  Oh,  Jack !  "  she  exclaimed,  and  happy  the  man 
who  hears  his  name  called  in  such  a  tone — even  if 
it  be  only  for  once  in  the  whole  course  of  his 
existence. 

He  pitched  his  suit-case  down  upon  the  grass 
and  took  the  maid  in  his  arms. 

What  did  anything  matter;  they  both  were 
lonely  and  both  needed  comforting. 

He  kissed  her  not  once  but  twenty  times, — not 
twenty  times  but  a  hundred. 


288    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  It's  abominable  you're  being  here,"  he  said 
at  last. 

"  I  am  very,  very  tired,"  she  confessed. 

"  And  you'll  go  back  to  the  city  when  I  go?  " 
he  asked. 

"  I  don't  know,"  she  said,  doubtfully.  "  I  don't 
know  whether  she'll  let  me." 

Jack  laughed. 

'To-morrow  I  will  beard  Aunt  Mary  in  her 
den,"  he  declared;  "now  let's  go  in  and — 
and " 

The  hundred  and  first  I 


Chapter  Twenty-Four 

TWO   ARE    COMPANY 

TO  the  large  square  room  where  he  had 
slept  (on  and  off)  during  a  goodly  portion 
of  his  boyhood  life,  Jack  went  to  repose 
from  his  journey,  there  to  meditate  the  situation 
which  he  had  come  to  comfort,  and  to  try  and  de- 
vise a  way  to  better  its  existing  circumstances. 

It  was  a  pleasant  room,  one  window  looking 
down  the  driveway,  and  the  other  leading  forth 
to  a  square  balcony  that  topped  the  little  porch  of 
the  side  entrance.  There  were  lambrequins  of  dark 
blue  with  fringe  that  always  caught  in  the  shutters, 
and  a  bedroom  suite  of  mahogany  that  had  come 
down  from  the  original  John  Watkins's  aunt,  and 
had  been  polished  by  her  descendants  so  faithfully 
that  its  various  surfaces  shone  like  mirrors.  Over 
the  bed  hung  a  tent  drapery  of  chintz;  over  the 
washstand  hung  a  crayon  done  by  Arethusa  in  her 
infancy — the  same  representing  a  lady  engaged  in 
the  pleasant  and  useful  occupation  of  spinning 
wheat  with  a  hand  composed  of  five  fingers,  and  no 
thumb.  In  the  corner  stood  a  cheval-glass  which 

389 


290    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Jack  had  seen  shrink  steadily  for  years  until  now  it 
could  no  longer  reflect  his  shoulders  unless  he 
retired  back  for  some  two  yards  or  more.  There 
was  a  delectable  closet  to  the  room,  all  painted 
white  inside,  with  shelves  and  cupboards  and  little 
bins  for  shoes  and  waste  paper  and  soiled  clothes. 

Oh !  it  was  really  an  altogether  delightful  place 
in  which  to  abide,  and  the  pity  was  that  its  owner 
had  spent  so  little  time  therein  of  late  years. 

To-night — returning  to  the  scene  of  many  child- 
ish and  boyish  meditations — Jack  placed  his  lamp 
upon  the  nightstand  at  the  head  of  the  bed  and 
sat  himself  down  on  a  chair  near  by. 

It  was  late — quite  midnight — for  he  and  Aunt 
Mary's  new  maid  had  talked  long  and  freely  ere 
they  separated  at  last.  From  his  room  he  could 
hear  the  little  faint  sounds  below  stairs,  that  told 
of  her  final  preparations  for  Luanda's  morning 
eye,  and  he  rested  quiet  until  all  else  was  quiet  and 
then  leaned  back  upon  the  chair's  hind  legs  and, 
tipping  slowly  to  and  fro  in  that  position,  tried 
to  see  just  what  he  had  better  do  the  first  thing  on 
the  following  day. 

It  was  a  riddle  with  a  vengeance.  It  is  so  easy 
to  say  "  I'll  cut  that  Gordian  knot !  "  and  then 
pack  one's  tooth-brush  and  start  off  unknotting, 
but  it  is  quite  another  matter  when  one  comes  face 
to  face  with  the  problem  and  is  met  by  the  "  buts  " 


"  '  Yesterday  I  played  poker  until  I  didn't  know  a  blue  chip  from 
a  white  one.'  " 


TWO   ARE    COMPANY  _    291 

of  those  who  have  previously  been  essaying  to  dis- 
entangle it. 

"  She  won't  let  me  go,"  Mrs.  Rosscott  had  de- 
clared, "  she  won't  consider  it  for  a  minute." 

"  But  she  must,"  Jack  had  declared  on  his  side. 
"  My  dearest,  you  can't  stay  and  play  maid  to  Aunt 
Mary  indefinitely,  and  you  know  that  as  well  as 
I  do." 

'  Yes,  I  know  that,"  the  whilom  Janice  then 
murmured.  "  It's  getting  to  be  an  awful  question. 
They  want  me  to  come  home  for  Thanksgiving. 
They  think  that  I've  been  at  the  rest-cure  long 
enough." 

Jack  had  laughed  a  bit  just  there,  and  then  he 
suddenly  ceased  laughing  and  frowned  a  good  deal 
instead. 

'  You  were  crying  when  I  came,"  he  said. 
'  The  truth  is  you  are  working  yourself  to  death 
and  getting  completely  used  up." 

"  It  is  wearing,  I  must  confess,"  she  answered. 
'  Yesterday  I  played  poker  until  I  didn't  know 
a  blue  chip  from  a  white  one,  and  she  won  the 
whole  pot  with  two  little  bits  of  pairs  while  I  was 
drawing  to  a  king.  I  begin  to  fear  that  my  mind 
will  give  way.  And  yet,  I  really  don't  see  how  to 
stop.  She  is  so  sick  and  tired  of  life  here  and  she 
isn't  strong  enough  to  go  to  town." 

"  I  know  a  very  short  way  to  put  an  end  to 


292    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT  MARY 

everything,"  said  Jack.  "  I  see  two  ways  in  fact, — 
one  is  to  tell  her  the  truth." 

"  Oh,  don't  do  that,"  cried  his  fiancee  affright- 
edly.  "  The  shock  would  kill  her  outright." 

"  The  other  way, — "  said  Jack  slowly,  "  would 
be  for  me  to  marry  you  and  let  her  think  that  you 
are  Janice  in  good  earnest." 

"  Oh,  that  wouldn't  do  at  all,"  said  the  pretty 
widow.  "  In  the  first  place  she  would  go  crazy  at 
the  idea  of  her  darling  nephew's  marrying  her 
maid, — and  in  the  second  place " 

"  Well, — in  the  second  place?  " 

"  I  wouldn't  marry  you, — I  said  I  wouldn't  and 
I  won't.  You're  too  young." 

"  But  you've  promised  to  marry  me  some  day." 

"  Yes,  I  know — but  not  till — not  till " 

"Not  till  when?" 

"  I  haven't  just  decided,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott, 
airily.  "  Not  for  a  good  while,  not  until  you 
seem  to  require  marrying  at  my  hands." 

"  I  never  shall  require  marrying  at  anyone  else's 
hands,"  the  lover  vowed,  "  but  if  you  are  so  set 
about  it  as  all  that  comes  to,  I  shall  not  cut  up 
rough  for  a  while.  Aunt  Mary  is  the  main  ques- 
tion just  now — not  you." 

"  I  know,"  said  his  lady  in  anything  but  a  jeal- 
ous tone,  "  and  as  she  is  the  question,  what  are 
we  to  do?" 


TWO  ARE   COMPANY  293 

"  You  will  go  to  bed,"  he  said,  kissing  her,  "  and 
I  will  go  to  think." 

"  Can  you  see  any  way?  "  she  asked   anxiously. 

Then  he  put  his  hands  on  either  side  of  her  face 
and  turned  it  up  to  his  own. 

"  You  plotted  once  and  overthrew  my  aunt,"  he 
said.  "  It's  my  turn  now." 

"  Are  you  going  to  plot?  " 

"  I'm  going  to  try." 

"  I'll  pray  for  your  success,"  she  whispered. 

"  Pray  for  me,"  he  answered,  and  shortly  after 
they  had  achieved  the  feat  of  saying  good-night 
and  parting  once  more,  and  the  result  of  it  all  had 
been  that  Jack  found  himself  tipping  back  and 
forth  on  the  small  chair,  in  the  big  room,  at  half- 
past  midnight,  puzzled,  perturbed,  and  very  much 
perplexed  as  to  what  to  do  first  when  the  next 
morning  should  have  become  a  settled  fact.  He 
was  not  used  to  conspiring,  and  being  only  a  man, 
he  had  not  those  curious  instinctive  gifts  of  inspira- 
tion and  luminous  conception  which  fairly  radiate 
around  the  brain  of  clever  womankind. 

It  was  some  time — a  very  long  time  indeed — be- 
fore any  light  stole  in  upon  his'Stygian  darkness, 
and  then,  when  the  light  did  come,  it  came  in  sky- 
rocket guise,  and  had  its  share  of  cons  attached  to 
its  very  evident  pros. 

"  But  I  don't  care,"  he  declared    viciously,  as 


he  rose  and  began  to  undress ;  "  something's  got  to 
be  done, — some  chances  have  got  to  be  taken, — 
as  well  that  as  anything  else.  Perhaps  better — 
very  likely  better." 

Then  he  laughed  over  his  unconscious  imitation 
of  his  aunt's  phraseology,  and  made  short  work  of 
finishing  his  disrobing  and  getting  to  bed. 

It  was  when  Lucinda  crept  forth  to  begin  to  un- 
lock the  house  at  6.30  upon  the  morning  after, 
that  the  fact  of  the  nephew's  arrival  was  first 
known  to  anyone  except  Janice. 

Lucinda  saw  the  coat  and  hat, — recognized  the 
initial  on  the  handkerchief  in  the  inside  pocket, 
threw  out  her  arms  and  gave  a  faint  squeak  in  utter 
bewilderment,  and  then  tore  off  at  once  to  the  barn 
to  tell  Joshua. 

She  found  Joshua  milking  the  cow. 

"  What  do  you  think!  "  she  panted  briefly,  with 
wide-open  eyes  and  uplifted  hands;  "  Joshua  Whit- 
tlesey,  what  do  you  think?  " 

"  I  don't  think  nothin',"  said  Joshua.  "  I'm 
milkin'." 

"  What  would  you  say  if  I  told  you  as  he  was 


come." 


"  I'd  say  he  was  here." 

"  Well,  he  is.  He  must  'a1  come  last  night,  an' 
Lord  only  knows  how  he  ever  got  in,  for  nothing 
was  left  open  an'  yet  he's  there." 


TWO   ARE    COMPANY  295 

Joshua  made  no  comment. 

"  I  wonder  what  he  came  for  ?  " 

Joshua  made  no  comment. 

"  I  wonder  how  long  he'll  stay?  " 

Still  Joshua  made  no  comment. 

"  Joshua  Whittlesey,  before  you  get  your  break- 
fast, you're  the  meanest  man  I  ever  saw,  and  I'll 
swear  to  that  anywhere." 

"  Why  don't  you  get  me  my  breakfast  then?  " 
said  Joshua  calmly;  and  the  effect  of  his  speech 
and  his  demeanor  was  to  cause  Lucinda  to  turn 
and  leave  him  at  once — too  outraged  to  address 
another  word  to  him. 

Aunt  Mary  herself  did  not  awake  until  ten 
o'clock.  She  rang  her  bell  vigorously  then  and 
Janice  flew  to  its  answering. 

"  I  dreamed  of  Jack,"  said  the  old  lady,  looking 
up  with  a  smile.  "  I  dreamed  we  was  each  ridin' 
on  camels  in  a  merry-go-round." 

Janice  smiled  too,  and  then  set  briskly  to  work 
to  put  the  room  in  order  and  arrange  its  occupant 
for  the  day. 

"  Did  there  come  any  mail?"  Aunt  Mary  in- 
quired, when  her  coiffure  was  made  and  her  dress- 
ing-gown, adjusted.  "  I  feel  jus'  like  I  might  hear 
from  Jack.  Seems  as  if  I  sort  of  can't  think  of 
anythin'  but  him." 

44  I'll  go  and  see,"  said  Janice   pleasantly,  and 


296    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

she  went  to  the  dining  room  where  the  Reformed 
Prodigal  sat  reading  the  newspaper  with  his  feet 
on  the  table — an  action  which  convinced  Lucinda 
that  he  had  not  reformed  so  very  much  after 
all. 

"  Suppose  you  go  to  her — instead  of  me,"  sug- 
gested the  maid,  pausing  before  the  reader  and 
usurping  all  the  attention  to  which  the  paper  should 
have  laid  claim. 

"  Suppose  I  do,"  said  Jack,  jumping  up,  "  and 
suppose  you  stay  away  and  let  me  try  what  I  can 
accomplish  single-handed." 

"  Only "  began  Janice  —  and  then  she 

stopped  and  lifted  a  warning  finger. 

Jack  listened  and  a  stealthy  creak  betrayed 
Lucinda's  proximity  somewhere  in  the  vicinity. 

It  was  plain  to  be  seen  that  there  were  many 
issues  to  be  kept  in  mind,  and  the  young  man  grit 
his  teeth  because  he  didn't  dare  embrace  his  be- 
trothed, and  then  walked  away  in  the  direction 
of  Aunt  Mary's  room. 

If  she  was  glad  to  see  him  I  One  would  have 
supposed  that  ten  years  and  two  oceans  had  elapsed 
since  their  last  meeting  the  month  before. 

She  fairly  screamed  with  joy. 

"  Jack! — You  dear,  dear,  dear  boy!  Well,  if  I 
ever  did! — When  did  you  come?  " 

He  was  by  the  bed  hugging  her. 


TWO   ARE    COMPANY  297 

"  And  how  are  they  all ?  How  is  the  city?  Oh, 
Jack,  if  I  could  only  go  back  with  you  this  time!  " 

"Never  mind,  Aunt  Mary;  you'll  be  coming 
soon — in  the  spring,  you  know." 

Aunt  Mary  sank  back  on  the  pillows. 

"  Jack,"  she  said,  "  if  I  have  to  wait  for  spring, 
I  shall  die.  I  ain't  strong  enough  to  be  able  to 
bear  livin'  in  the  country  much  longer.  I've  pretty 
much  made  up  my  mind  to  buy  a  house  in  town  and 
just  keep  this  place  so's  to  have  somewhere  to  put 
Lucinda." 

"  Do  you  think  you'd  be  happy  in  town,  Aunt 
Mary?  "  Jack  yelled;  "  I  mean  if  you  lived  there 
right  along?  " 

"  I  don't  see  how  I  could  be  anythin'  else.  I 
don't  see  how  anyone  could  be  anythin'  else. 
I  want  a  nice  house  with  a  criss-cross  iron  gate  in 
front  of  it  an'  an  automobile.  An' — I  don't  want 
you  to  say  nothin'  about  this  to  her  jus'  yet — but 
I'm  goin'  to  keep  Granite  to  look  after  everythin' 
for  me.  I  don't  ever  mean  to  let  Granite  go  again. 
Never.  Not  for  one  hour." 

Jack  smiled.  He  felt  as  if  Fate  was  playing  into 
his  hands. 

"  I  want  you  to  live  with  me,"  Aunt  Mary  con- 
tinued, "  an'  I  want  the  house  big  enough  so's  Clo- 
ver an'  Mitchell  an'  Burnett  can  come  whenever 
they  feel  like  it  and  stay  as  long  as  they  like.  I 


298    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT  MARY 

don't  want  any  house  except  for  us  all  together. 
Oh,  my!  Seems  like  I  can't  hardly  wait  I  " 

She  leaned  back  and  shut  her  eyes  in  a  sort  of 
impatient  ecstasy  of  joys  been  and  to  be. 

Jack  reached  forward  to  get  a  cigarette  from 
the  box  on  the  table  at  the  bedside. 

"Do  you  smoke  now,  Aunt  Mary?"  he  in- 
quired, as  he  took  a  match. 

"  No,  Granite  does." 

"  Janice  does  1  "  he  repeated,  quickly  knitting 
his  brows. 

"  Yes,  she  does  it  for  me — I'm  so  happy  smellin' 
the  smell.  They  made  her  a  little  sick  at  first  but 
she  took  camphor  and  now  she  don't  mind.  Not 
much — not  any." 

Jack  arose  and  walked  about  the  room.  The 
idea  of  his  darling  sickening  herself  to  provide 
smoke  for  Aunt  Mary  braced  him  afresh  to  the 
conflict. 

"What  do  you  do  all  day?"  he  asked, 
presently. 

"  Well,  we  do  most  everythin'.  When  Luanda's 
out  she  does  Lucinda  for  me  an'  when  Lucinda's  in 
she  does  Joshua.  It's  about  as  amusin'  as  anythin' 
you  ever  saw  to  see  her  do  Lucinda.  I  never  found 
Lucinda  amusin',  Lord  knows,  but  I  like  to  see 
Granite  do  her.  An'  we  play  cards,  an'  she  dances, 
an' " 


TWO   ARE   COMPANY  299 

"  Aunt  Mary,"  said  Jack  abruptly,  "  do  you 
know  the  people  who  had  Janice  want  her  back 
again?  " 

"  I  didn't  quite  catch  that,"  said  his  aunt,  "  but 
you  needn't  bother  to  repeat  it  because  I  ain't  never 
goin'  to  let  her  go.  Not  never." 

Jack  came  back  and  sat  down  beside  the  bed,  and 
took  her  hand. 

"  Aunt  Mary,"  he  said  in  a  pleading  shriek, 
"  don't  you  see  how  pale  and  thin  she's 
getting?  " 

"  No,  I  don't,"  said  his  aunt,  turning  her  head 
away,  "  an'  it's  no  use  tellin'  me  such  things  be- 
cause it's  about  my  nap-time  and  I've  always  been 
a  great  believer  in  takin'  my  nap  when  it's  my 
nap-time.  As  a  general  thing." 

Jack  sighed  and  watched  her  close  her  eyes  and 
go  instantly  to  sleep.  Janice  came  in  a  few  min- 
utes later. 

"  No — no,"  she  whispered  hastily,  as  he  came 
toward  her, — "  you  mustn't — you  mustn't.  I  don't 
believe  that  she  really  is  asleep  and  even  if  she  is, 
Lucinda  is  everywhere" 

'Where  can  we  go?"  Jack  asked  in  despair. 
"  It's  out  of  all  reason  to  expect  me  to  behave  all 
the  time." 

'  We  can't  go  anywhere,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott; 
"  we  must  resign  ourselves.  I've  learned  that  it's 


300    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

the  only  way.  Dear  me,  when  I  think  how  long 
I've  been  resigned  it  certainly  seems  to  me  that 
you  might  do  a  little  in  the  same  line." 

"  Well,  but  I  haven't  learned  to  resign  myself," 
said  her  lover,  "  and  what  is  more,  I  positively  de- 
cline to  learn  to  resign  myself.  You  should  do  the 
same,  too.  Where  is  the  sense  in  humoring  her  so  ? 
I  wouldn't  if  I  were  you." 

Janice  lifted  up  her  lovely  eyes. 

"  Oh,  yes,  you  would,"  she  said  simply.  "  If 
somebody's  future  happiness  depended  upon  her 
you  would  humor  her  just  as  much  as  I  do." 

Jack  was  touched. 

"  You  are  an  angel  of  unselfishness,"  he  ex- 
claimed, warmly,  "  and  I  don't  deserve  such 
devotion." 

"  Oh,  don't  be  too  grateful,"  she  replied,  dim- 
pling. "  The  person  to  whose  future  happiness  I 
referred  was  myself." 

They  both  laughed  softly  at  that — softly  and 
mutually. 

"  Nevertheless,"  Jack  went  on  after  a  minute, 
"  if  to  all  the  other  puzzles  is  to  be  added  the 
torture  of  being  unable  to  see  you  or  speak 
freely  to  you,  I  think  the  hour  for  action  has 
arrived." 

"  For  action!  "  she  cried;  "  what  are  you  think- 
ing of  doing?  " 


TWO   ARE    COMPANY  301 

"  This,"  he  said,  and  straightway  took  her 
into  his  arms  and  kissed  her  as  he  had  kissed  her 
on  the  night  before. 

"  Oh,  if  Lucinda  has  heard  or  your  aunt  has 
seen !  "  poor  Janice  cried,  extricating  herself  and 
setting  her  cap  to  rights  with  a  species  of  fluttered 
haste  that  led  Jack  to  wonder  suddenly  why  men 
didn't  fall  in  love  with  maids  even  oftener  than 
they  do.  "  I  do  believe  that  you  have  gone  and 
done  it  this  time." 

"  Nobody  heard  and  nobody  saw,"  he  assured 
her,  but  he  didn't  at  all  mean  what  he  said,  for  his 
prayers  were  fervent  that  his  kiss  had  been  public 
property. 

And  such  was  the  fact. 

Lucinda  bounced  in  on  Joshua  with  a  bounce  that 
turned  the  can  of  harness  polish  upside  down,  for 
Joshua  was  oiling  the  harnesses. 

"  He  kissed  her !  "  she  cried  in  a  state  of  tre- 
mendous excitement. 

'  Well,  she's  his  aunt,  ain't  she?"  Joshua  de- 
manded, picking  up  the  can  and  privately  wishing 
Lucinda  in  Halifax. 

"  I  don't  mean  her; — I  mean  Janice." 

"  I  don't  see  anythin'  surprisin'  in  that,"  said 
Joshua, — "  not  if  he  got  a  good  chance." 
'  What  do  you  think  of  such  goin's  on?  " 

"  I  think  they'll  lead  to  goin's  offs." 


302      REJUVENATION  OF  AUNT  MARY 

"  I  never  would  'a'  believed  it,"  said  Lucinda; 
"  well,  all  I  can  say  is  I  wish  he'd  'a'  tried  it 
on  me." 

"You'll  wish  a  long  time,"  said  Joshua, 
placidly  ;  and  his  tone,  as  usual,  made  Lucinda 
even  more  angry  than  his  words  ;  so  she  forth- 
with left  him  and  tore  back  to  the  house. 

Aunt  Mary  had  also  had  her  eyes  open,  and  in 
this  particular  case  it  was  impossible  to  have  one's 
eyes  open  without  having  one's  eyes  opened.  So 
Aunt  Mary  had  both. 

She  shut  them  at  once  and  reflected  deeply,  and 
when  Janice  went  out  of  the  room  at  last  she  im- 
mediately sat  up  in  bed  and  addressed  her  nephew. 

"  Jack,  what  did  you  kiss  her  for?  " 

Jack  was  fairly  wild  with  joy  at  the  brilliant  way 
in  which  he  had  begun.  Mrs.  Rosscott  had  laid 
one  scheme  for  the  overthrow  of  Aunt  Mary  and 
her  plan  of  attack  had  been  absolutely  successful. 
Now  it  was  his  turn  and  he,  too,  was  in  it  to  win 
undying  glory  or  else — well,  no  matter.  There 
wouldn't  be  any  "  also  ran  "  in  this  contest. 

"  You  don't  deny  that  you  kissed  her,  do  you  ?  " 
said  his  aunt  severely.  "  Answer  this  minute. 
I'm  a  great  believer  in  answerin'  when  you're 
spoken  to." 

"  Yes,  I  kissed  her,"  he  said  easily. 

"  Well,  what  did  you  do  it  for?  " 


TWO   ARE    COMPANY  303 

"  I'm  very  fond  of  her;  "  the  words  came  forth 
with  great  apparent  reluctance. 

"  Fond  of  her!  "  said  Aunt  Mary  with  great 
contempt. 

Jack  lifted  his  eyes  quickly  at  the  tone  of  her 
comment. 

"Fond  of  her!  Do  you  think  a  girl  like  that 
is  the  kind  to  be  fond  of!  Why  ain't  you  in  love 
with  her?  " 

The  young  man  felt  his  brains  suddenly  swim- 
ming. This  surpassed  his  maddest  hopes. 

"  Shall  I  say  that  I  am  in  love  with  her?  "  he 
cried  into  the  ear-trumpet. 

Aunt  Mary  raised  up  in  bed, — her  eyes 
sparkling. 

"  Jack,"  she  said,  almost  quivering  with  excite- 
ment, "  are  you  in  love  with  her?  " 

"  Yes,  I  am,"  he  owned,  wondering  what  would 
come  next,  but  feeling  that  the  tide  was  all  his  way. 

Aunt  Mary  collapsed  with  a  joyful  sigh. 

"  My  heavens  alive,"  she  said  rapturously, 
"  seems  like  it's  too  good  to  be  true!  Jack,"  she 
continued  solemnly,  "  if  you're  in  love  with  her  you 
shall  marry  her.  If  there's  any  way  to  keep  a  girl 
like  that  in  the  family  I  guess  I  ain't  goin'  to  let 
her  slip  through  my  fingers  not  while  I've  got  a 
live  nephew.  You  shall  marry  her  an'  I'll  buy  you 
a  house  in  New  York  and  come  an'  live  with  you." 


304    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Jack  sat  silent,  but  smiling. 

"  Do  you  think  she  will  want  to  marry  me?  " 
he  asked  presently. 

"  You  go  and  bring  her  to  me,"  said  the  old 
lady  vigorously.  "  I'll  soon  find  out.  Just  tell 
her  I  want  to  speak  to  her — don't  tell  her  what 
about.  That  ain't  none  of  your  business  an'  I'm 
a  great  believer  in  people's  not  interfering  in  what's 
none  of  their  business.  You  just  get  her  and  then 
leave  her  to  me." 

Jack  went  and  found  Janice.  He  was  suffi- 
ciently mean  not  to  tell  her  what  had  happened, 
and  Janice — being  built  on  a  different  plan  from 
Lucinda — had  not  kept  near  enough  to  the  key- 
hole to  be  posted  anyway. 

"  Mr.  Denham  says  you  want  me,"  she  said, 
coming  to  the  bedside  with  her  customary  pleasant 
smile. 

"  I  do,"  said  her  mistress.  "  I  want  to  speak 
to  you  on  a  very  serious  subject  and  I  want  you  to 
pay  a  lot  of  attention.  It's  this:  I  want  you  to 
marry  Jack." 

Poor  Janice  jumped  violently, — there  was  no 
doubt  as  to  the  genuineness  of  her  surprise. 

"  Well,  don't  you  want  to?  "  asked  Aunt  Mary. 

"  I  don't  believe  I  do." 

At  this  it  was  the  old  lady's  turn  to  be  aston- 
ished. 


TWO   ARE    COMPANY  305 

"Why  don't  you?"  she  said;  "my  heavens 
alive,  what  are  you  a-expectin'  to  marry  if  you  don't 
think  my  nephew's  good  enough  for  you?  " 

"  But  I  don't  want  to  marry !  "  cried  poor  Jan- 
ice, in  most  evident  distress. 

Aunt  Mary  looked  at  her  severely. 

"  Then  what  did  you  kiss  him  for?  "  she  asked, 
in  the  tone  in  which  one  plays  the  trump  ace. 

Janice  started  again. 

"  Kiss — him "  she  faltered. 

Aunt  Mary  regarded  her  sternly. 

"  Granite,"  she  said,  "  I  ain't  a-intendin'  to  be 
unreasonable,  but  I  must  ask  you  jus'  one  simple 
question.  You  kissed  him,  for  I  saw  you;  an'  will 
you  kindly  tell  me  why,  in  heaven's  name,  you  ain't 
willin'  to  marry  any  man  that  you're  willin'  to 
kiss?" 

'  There's  such  a  difference,"  wailed  the  maid. 

"  I  don't  see  it,"  said  her  mistress,  shaking  her 
head.  "  I  don't  see  it  at  all.  Of  course  I  never 
for  a  minute  thought  of  doin'  either  myself,  but  if 
I  had  thought  of  doin'  either,  I'd  had  sense  enough 
to  have  seen  that  I'd  have  to  make  up  my  mind  to 
do  both.  I'm  a  great  believer  in  never  doin'  things 
by  halves.  It  don't  pay.  Never — nohow." 

Janice  was  biting  her  lips. 

"But  I  don't  want  to  marry!"  she  repeated 
obstinately. 


306    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Then  you  shouldn't  have  let  him  kiss  you. 
You've  got  him  all  started  to  lovin'  you  and  if  he's 
stopped  too  quick  no  one  can  tell  what  may  happen. 
I  want  him  to  settle  down,  but  I  want  him  to  set- 
tle down  because  he's  happy  an'  not  because  he's 
shattered.  He  says  he's  willin'  to  marry  you  an' 
I  don't  see  any  good  reason  why  not." 

Janice's  mouth  continued  to  look  rebellious. 

"  Go  and  get  him,"  said  Aunt  Mary.  "  I  can  see 
that  this  thing  has  got  to  be  settled  pleasantly  right 
off,  or  we  shan't  none  of  us  have  any  appetite  for 
dinner.  You  find  Jack,  or  if  you  can't  find  him  tell 
Lucinda  that  she's  got  to." 

Janice  went  out  and  found  Jack  in  the  hall. 

"  Is  this  a  trap?  "  she  asked   reproachfully. 

Jack  laughed. 

"  No,"  he  said  "  it's  a  counter-mine." 

"Your  aunt  wants  you  at  once,"  said  Janice,  put- 
ting her  hands  into  her  pockets  and  looking  out 
of  the  window. 

"  I  fly  to  obey,"  he  said  obediently,  and  went 
at  once  to  his  elderly  relative. 

"  Jack,"  she  said,  the  instant  he  opened  the  door, 
"  I've  had  a  little  talk  with  Granite.  She  don't 
want  to  marry  you,  but  she  looks  to  me  like  she 
really  didn't  know  her  own  mind.  I've  said  all  I 
can  say  an'  I'm  too  tired  holdin'  the  ear-trumpet  to 
say  any  more.  I  think  the  best  thing  you  can  do  is 


TWO   ARE    COMPANY  307 

to  take  her  out  for  a  walk  an'  explain  things 
thoroughly.  It's  no  good  our  talkin'  to  her  to- 
gether; and,  anyway,  I've  always  been  a  great 
believer  in  '  Two's  company — three's  none.'  That 
was  really  the  big  reason  why  I'd  never  let  Lucinda 
keep  a  cat.  You  take  her  and  go  to  walk  and  I 
guess  everything'll  come  out  all  right.  It  ought 
to.  My  heavens  alive !  " 

Jack  took  the  maid  and  they  went  out  to  walk. 
When  they  were  beyond  earshot  the  first  thing 
that  they  did  was  to  laugh  long  and  loud. 

"  Of  all  my  many  and  varied  adventures !" 
cried  Mrs.  Rosscott,  and  Jack  took  the  opportunity 
to  kiss  her  again — under  no  protest  this  time. 

"  We  shall  have  to  be  married  very  soon,  now, 
you  know,"  he  said  gayly.  "  Aunt  Mary  won't  be 
able  to  wait." 

"  Oh,  as  to  that — we'll  see,"  said  Mrs.  Ross- 
cott, and  laughed  afresh.  "  But  there  is  one  thing 
that  must  be  done  at  once." 

"What's  that?  "Jack  asked. 

"  We  must  tell  Aunt  Mary  who  I  am." 

"  Oh,  to  be  sure,"  said  the  young  man. 

"  I  hope  she  won't  take  it  in  any  way  but  the 
right  way !  "  the  widow  said  thoughtfully. 

"  My  dearest,  in  what  other  way  could  she  take 
it?  I  think  she  has  proved  her  opinion  of  you 
pretty  sincerely." 


308    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Yes,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott,  with  a  little  smile, 
"  I  certainly  have  cause  to  feel  that  she  loves  me 
for  myself  alone." 

When  they  returned  to  the  house  they  went 
straightway  to  Aunt  Mary's  room,  and  the  first 
glance  through  the  old  lady's  eye-glasses  told  her 
that  her  wishes  had  all  been  fulfilled.  She  sat  up 
in  bed,  took  a  hand  of  each  into  her  own,  and  sur- 
veyed them  in  an  access  of  such  utter  joy  as  nearly 
caused  all  three  to  weep  together. 

"  Well,  I  am  so  glad,"  was  all  she  said  for  the 
first  few  seconds,  and  nobody  doubted  her  words 
forever  after. 

Then  Mrs.  Rosscott  removed  her  hat  and  jacket, 
and  when  she  returned  to  the  bedside  her  future 
aunt  made  her  sit  down  close  to  her  and  hold  one 
of  her  hands  while  Jack  held  the  other. 

"  I'm  so  glad  you're  to  have  the  runnin'  of  Jack," 
the  old  lady  declared  sincerely.  "  All  I  ask  of  you 
is  to  be  patient  with  him.  I  always  was.  That  is, 
most  always." 

"  Dear  Aunt  Mary,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott,  slip- 
ping down  on  her  knees  beside  the  bed,  "  you  are 
so  good  to  me  that  you  encourage  me  to  tell  you 
my  secret.  It  isn't  long,  and  it  isn't  bad,  but  I  have 
a  confession  to  make." 

"  Oh,  I  say,"  cried  Jack,  "  if  you  put  it  that  way 
let  me  do  the  owning  up !  " 


TWO   ARE    COMPANY  309 

"  Hush,"  said  his  love  authoritatively,  "  it's  my 
confession.  Leave  it  to  me." 

"What  is  it?"  said  Aunt  Mary,  looking 
anxiously  from  one  to  the  other;  "you  haven't 
broke  your  engagement  already,  I  hope." 

"  No,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott,  "  it  s  nothing 
like  that.  It's  only  rather  a  surprise.  But  it's 
a  nice  surprise, — at  least,  I  hope  you'll  think  that 
it  is." 

;t  Well,  hurry  and  tell  me  then,"  said  the  old 
lady.  "  I'm  a  great  believer  in  bein'  told  good 
news  as  soon  as  possible.  What  is  it?  " 

"  It's  that  I'm  not  a  maid,"  said  the  pretty 
widow. 

"  Not — a "  cried  Aunt  Mary   blankly. 

"  I'm  a  widow!  "  said  Janice.  "  I'm  Burnett's 
sister." 

"  Wh— a— at !  "  cried  Aunt  Mary.  "  I  didn't 
jus'  catch  that." 

'  You  see,"  screamed  Jack,  "  she  was  afraid 
to  have  me  entertain  you  in  New  Yorl^ — afraid 
you  wouldn't  be  properly  looked  after,  Aunt  Mary, 
so  she  dressed  up  for  your  maid  and  looked  after 
you  herself." 

"  My  heavens  alive !  " 

;'  Wasn't  she  an  angel?  "  he  asked. 

"  But  whatever  made  you  take  such  an  inter- 
est? "  Aunt  Mary  demanded  of  Janice. 


310    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

Janice  rose  from  her  knees  and,  leaning  over 
the  bed,  drew  the  old  lady  close  in  her  arms. 

"  I'll  tell  you,"  she  screamed  gently.  "  I  loved 
Jack,  and  so  I  loved  his  aunt  even  before  I  had  ever 
seen  her." 

Aunt  Mary's  joy  fairly  overflowed  at  that  view 
of  things,  and,  putting  her  hands  to  either  side  of 
the  lovely  face  so  close  to  her  own,  she  kissed  it 
warmly  again  and  again. 

"  I  always  knew  you  were  suthin'  out  of  the  or- 
dinary," she  declared  vigorously.  "  You  know  I 
wouldn't  have  let  him  marry  you  if  I  hadn't  been 
pretty  sure  as  you  were  different  from  Lucinda  an' 
the  common  run." 

And  then  she  beamed  on  them  both  and  Jack 
beamed  on  them  both  and  Mrs.  Rosscott  kissed 
each  of  them  and  dried  her  own  happy  eyes. 

"  Now  I  want  to  know  jus'  how  an'  where  you 
learned  to  love  him?  "  the  aunt  asked  next. 

"  I  loved  him  almost  directly  I  knew  him,"  she 
answered,  and  at  that  Aunt  Mary  seemed  on  the 
point  of  applauding  with  the  ear-trumpet  against 
the  headboard. 

"  It  was  jus'  the  same  with  me,"  she  said  de- 
lightedly. "  He  was  only  a  baby  then,  but  the  first 
look  I  took  I  jus'  had  a  feelin' " 

"  Yes,"  said  Mrs.  Rosscott  sympathetically, 
"  so  did  I." 


TWO   ARE    COMPANY  311 

They  all  laughed  together. 

"  An'  now,"  said  Aunt  Mary,  laying  back  and 
folding  her  arms  upon  her  bosom,  "  an'  now  conies 
the  main  question, — when  do  you  two  want  to  be 
married?  " 

"Oh!"  said  the  widow  starting,  "we — I — 
Jack " 

"  Well,  go  on,"  said  Aunt  Mary.  "  Say  when- 
ever you  like.  An'  then  Jack  can  do  the  same." 

The  two  young  people  exchanged  glances. 

"  Speak  right  up,"  said  Aunt  Mary.  "  I'm  a 
great  believer  in  not  hangin'  back  when  anythin' 
has  got  to  be  decided.  Jack,  what  do  you  think?  " 

"  I  want  to  get  married  right  off,"  said  Jack 
decidedly. 

"  I  think  he's  too  young,"  put  in  Mrs.  Rosscott 
hastily. 

"  I  don't  know,"  said  Aunt  Mary,  looking  at 
her  nephew  reflectively.  "  Seems  to  me  he's  big 
enough,  an'  I'm  a  great  believer  in  never  dilly- 
dallyin'  over  what's  got  to  be  done  some  time. 
Why  not  Thanksgiving?  " 

:'  Thanksgiving !  "  shrieked  Mrs.  Rosscott. 

"  Yes,"  said  Aunt  Mary.  "  I  think  it  would  be 
a  good  time,  an'  then  I  can  come  and  spend  Christ- 
mas with  you  in  the  city." 

"  Great  idea!  "  declared  her  nephew;  "  me  for 
Thanksgiving." 


REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  What  do  you  say?  "  said  Aunt  Mary  to  the 
bride-to-be. 

"  Oh,  I  don't  see — "  began  the  latter,  wrinkling 
her  pretty  forehead  in  a  prettier  perplexity  and 
looking  helplessly  back  and  forth  between  their 
double  eagerness. 

"  Well,  why  not?  "  said  the  aunt.  "  It  ain't  as 
if  there  was  any  reason  for  waitin'.  If  there  was 
I'd  be  the  first  to  be  willin'  to  do  all  I  could  to  be 
patient,  but  as  it  is — even  if  you  an'  Jack  ain't  in 
any  particular  hurry,  I  am,  an'  I  was  brought  up 
to  go  right  to  work  at  gettin'  what  you  want  as 
soon  as  you  know  what  it  is." 

"  But  this  is  so  sudden,"  wailed  Mrs.  Rosscott. 

Aunt  Mary  glanced  at  her  sharply. 

"  That's  what  they  all  say,  a'cordin'  to  the 
papers,"  she  said  calmly,  "  an'  it  never  is  counted 
as  anythin'  but  a  joke." 

"But  I'm  not  joking,"  Janice  cried. 

"  Then  you  jus'  take  a  little  time  an'  think  it 
over,"  proposed  the  old  lady, — "  I'll  tell  you  what 
you  can  do.  You  can  get  me  Lucinda  because  I 
want  to  tell  her  suthin'  and  then  you  and  Jack  can 
sit  down  together  an'  think  it  over  anywhere  an' 
anyhow  you  like." 

"  Do  you  really  want  Lucinda,"  said  Janice, 
rising  to  her  feet,  "  or  is  it  something  that  I  can 
do?  You  know  I'm  yours  just  the  same  as  ever, 


TWO   ARE    COMPANY  313 

Aunt  Mary.    Next  to  being  good  to  Jack,  I  want 
to  always  be  good  to  you." 

Aunt  Mary  looked  up  with  a  light  in  her  eyes 
that  was  fine  to  see. 

"  Bless  you,  my  child,"  she  said  heartily.  "  I 
know  that,  but  I  really  want  Lucinda,  an'  you  an' 
Jack  can  take  care  of  yourselves  for  a  while.  Least- 
ways, I  hope  you  can.  I  guess  you  can.  I  pre- 
sume so,  anyway." 

It  was  late  that  afternoon  that  Lucinda,  looking 
as  if  she  had  been  accidentally  overtaken  by  a  road- 
roller,  joined  Joshua  in  the  potato  cellar. 

'  Well,  the  sky  c'n  fall  whenever  it  likes  now !  " 
she  said,  sitting  down  on  an  empty  barrel  with  a 
resigned  sigh. 

4  That's  a  comfort  to  know,"  said  Joshua. 

"  She's  got  it  all  made  up  for  'em  to  marry  each 
other." 

'  That  ain't  no  great  news  to  me,"  said  Joshua. 
'  Joshua  Whittlesey,  you  make  my  blood  boil. 
Things  is  goin'  rackin'  and  ruinin'  at  a  great  pace 
here  an'  you  as  cold  as  a  cauliflower  over  it  all." 

Joshua  sorted  potatoes  phlegmatically  and  said 
nothing. 

"  S'posin'  I'd  'a'  wanted  to  marry  him?  " 

Joshua  continued  to  sort  potatoes. 

"  Or,  s'posin'  you  wanted  to  marry  her?  " 

Joshua  looked  up  quickly. 


REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"Which  one?  "he  said. 

"Janice!" 

"  Oh,"  he  said  in  a  relieved  tone. 

"  Why  did  you  say  *  oh,' — did  you  think  I  meant 
her?" 

"  I  didn't  know  who  you  meant." 

"  Why,  you  wouldn't  think  o'  marryin'  her, 
would  you?" 

"  No,"  said  Joshua  emphatically.  "  I'd  as 
soon  think  o'  marryin'  you  yourself." 

Lucinda  deliberated  for  a  minute  or  so  as  to 
whether  to  accept  this  insult  in  silence  or  not,  and 
finally  decided  to  make  just  one  more  remark. 

"  I  wonder  if  she'll  send  any  word  to  Arethusa 
'n'  Mary." 

"  They'll  know  soon  enough,"  said  Joshua 
oracularly. 

"  How'll  they  know,  I'd  like  to  know? " 

"  You'll  write  'em." 

Lucinda  was  dumb.  The  fact  that  the  letter 
was  already  written  only  made  the  serpent-tooth  of 
Joshua's  intimate  knowledge  cut  the  deeper. 


Chapter  Twenty-Five 

GRAND    FINALE 

She  has  it  all  made  up  for  him  to  marry  her,  and 
she  is  certainly  as  happy  as  she  is  and  he  is  them- 
selves. She  is  making  plans  at  a  great  rate  and 
she  has  consented  to  have  her  wedding  here  because 
she  wants  to  be  there  herself.  The  day  is  set  for 
Thanksgiving  and  the  Lord  be  with  us  for  every- 
thing has  got  to  be  just  so  and  she  is  no  more  good 
at  helping  now  that  he's  come.  They  are  all 
going  back  to  New  York  as  soon  as  possible  after 
it's  over  and  I  hope  to  be  forgiven  for  stating 
plainly  that  it  will  be  the  happiest  day  of  my  life. 

Respectfully, 

L.  COOKE. 

Upon  receipt  of  this  astounding  news  Arethusa 
took  the  train  and  flew  to  the  scene  where  such 
momentous  happenings  were  piling  up  on  one 
nnother.  Her  arrival  was  unexpected  and  the 
changes  which  she  found  ensued  and  ensuing  were 
of  a  nature  bewildering  in  the  extreme.  Aunt 
Mary  had  quit  her  regime  of  soup  and  sleep  and 
was  not  only  more  energetically  vigorous  as  to 
mind  than  ever,  but  strengthening  daily  as  to  bodily 
force.  It  might  have  been  the  excitement,  for  Bur- 
nett was  there,  Clover  was  en  route,  and  Mitchell 

3*5 


316    REJUVENATION    OF   AUNT   MARY 

was  expected  within  twenty-four  hours.  Other  great 
changes  were  visible  everywhere.  A  corps  of 
servants  from  town  had  fairly  swamped  Lucinda 
and  twenty  carpenters  were  putting  up  an  extra 
addition  to  the  house  in  which  to  give  the  wedding 
room  to  spread.  Nor  was  this  all,  for  Aunt  Mary 
had  turned  a  furniture  man  and  an  upholsterer 
loose  with  no  other  limit  than  that  comprised  by 
the  two  words  "  carte  blanche." 

Mrs.  Rosscott  still  continued  to  wait  upon  Aunt 
Mary,  but  another  maid  had  arrived  to  await  upon 
Mrs.  Rosscott.  The  latter  had  shed  her  black  uni- 
form and  bloomed  forth  in  rose-hued  robes.  Mr. 
Stebbins  was  kept  on  tap  from  dawn  to  dark  and 
the  checks  flowed  like  water.  Emissaries  had  been 
despatched  to  New  York  to  buy  the  young  couple 
a  suitable  house  and  furnish  that  also  from  top  to 
bottom. 

"  Well,  Arethusa,"  the  aunt  said  to  the  niece 
when  they  met  the  morning  after  her  arrival,  "  I'm 
feelin'  better  'n  I  was  last  time  you  were  here." 

"  I'm  so  glad,"  yelled  Arethusa. 

"  They'll  live  in  New  York  and  I'll  live  with 
them.  As  far  as  I've  seen  there  ain't  no  other 
place  on  earth  to  live.  I'm  goin'  to  get  me  a  coat 
lined  with  black-spotted  white  cat's  fur  and  have 
my  glasses  put  on  a  parasol  handle,  and  I'm  going 
to  have  the  collars  and  sleeves  left  out  of  most  of 


GRAND   FINALE  317 

my  dresses  an'  look  like  other  people.  I'm  a  great 
believer  in  doin'  as  others  do,  an'  Jack  won't  ever 
have  no  cause  to  complain  that  I  didn't  take  easy 
to  city  life." 

Arethusa  felt  herself  dumb  before  these  reve- 
lations. 

Later  she  was  conducted  to  see  the  wedding 
presents,  which  were  gorgeous.  Among  them  was 
the  biggest  and  brightest  of  crimson  automobiles  ; 
and  Mitchell,  who  had  presented  it,  had  chris- 
tened it  beforehand  "  The  Midnight  Sun."  Aunt 
Mary's  gift  was  the  New  York  house  and  money 
enough  for  them  to  live  on  the  income. 

"  I  know  you're  able  to  look  out  for  yourself," 
she  told  the  bride,  "  but  I  don't  want  Jack  to  have 
to  worry  over  things  at  all,  and,  although  I  know 
it's  a  good  habit,  still  I  shouldn't  like  to  have  him 
ever  work  so  hard  that  he  wouldn't  feel  like  goin' 
around  with  us  nights.  Not  ever.  Not  even 
sometimes." 

Mitchell  was  overjoyed  at  the  way  things  had 
turned  out. 

"  My  dear  Miss  Watkins,"  he  screamed,  when 
he  was  ushered  into  Aunt  Mary's  presence,  "  who 
could  have  guessed  in  the  hour  of  that  sad  parting 
in  New  York  that  such  a  glad  future  was  held  in 
store  for  us  all !  " 

"  I  didn't  quite  catch  that,"   Aunt  Mary  ex- 


318    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

i 

claimed,  rapturously,  "  but  it  doesn't  matter — as 
long  as  you  got  here  safe  at  last." 

"  Safe !  "  exclaimed  the  young  man ;  "  it  would 
have  been  the  very  refinement  of  cruelty  if  my  train 
had  smashed  me  on  this  journey." 

Burnett  was  equally  happy. 

"  I  suppose  it  will  be  up  to  me  to  give  you  away," 
he  said  to  his  sister;  "  before  all  these  people,  too. 
What  a  mean  trick !  " 

Jack  had  thought  that  he  would  like  to  have 
Tweedwell  marry  him,  as  that  young  man  had  put 
in  the  summer  vacation  getting  ordained.  Tweed- 
well  accepted — although  he  had  just  taken  charge 
of  a  living  in  Seattle  and  came  through  on  a  flyer 
which  arrived  two  hours  before  the  hour.  Some 
fifty  or  sixty  of  the  guests  came  in  on  the  same 
train,  and  Burnett  and  Clover  met  them  all  at  the 
cars  and  made  the  majority  comfortable  in  the  dif- 
ferent hotels  and  honored  the  minority  with  Aunt 
Mary's  hospitality. 

The  day  was  gorgeous.  The  addition  to  the 
house  was  done  and  lined  with  white  and  decorated 
in  gold.  An  orchestra  was,  ensconced  behind  palms 
just  as  orchestras  always  covet  to  be  and  a  mag- 
nificent breakfast  had  been  sent  up  from  the  city 
in  its  own  car  with  its  own  service  and  attendants 
to  serve  it. 

There  was  only  one  hitch   in  the  entire  pro- 


GRAND  FINALE  319 

gramme.  That  was  that  when  they  got  to  the 
church  Tweedwell  did  not  show  up.  Jack  was  dis- 
tressed even  though  Mrs.  Rosscott  laughed. 
Mitchell  wanted  to  read  the  ceremony,  but  Aunt 
Mary  was  afraid  it  wouldn't  be  legal,  and  Mr. 
Stebbins  agreed  with  her.  In  the  end  the  regular 
clergyman  married  them;  and  just  as  they  were  all 
filing  out  they  met  Tweedwell  and  Lucinda  tear- 
ing along,  he  in  his  surplice  and  she  in  the  black  silk 
dress  which  Aunt  Mary  had  given  her  in  celebra- 
tion of  the  occasion.  They  were  both  too  ex- 
hausted to  be  able  to  explain  for  several  minutes; 
but  it  finally  came  out  (of  Lucinda)  that  Burnett, 
whose  place  it  was  to  have  overseen  officiating 
Tweedwell,  had  forgotten  all  about  him,  and  the 
poor  fellow,  exhausted  by  his  long  journey,  had 
never  awakened  until  Lucinda,  going  in  to  clear  up 
his  room,  had  let  forth  a  piercing  howl  of  surprise. 

So  far  from  dampening  anyone's  spirits  this  little 
contretemps  Only  seemed  to  set  things  off  at  a 
livelier  pace.  They  had  a  brisk  ride  home,  and 
the  wedding  feast  and  the  wedding  cake  were  all 
that  could  be  desired.  What  went  with  it  was  the 
finest  that  any  of  the  guests  ever  tasted  before  or 
since,  and  the  champagne  was  all  but  served  in 
beer  steins. 

When  it  came  to  the  healths  they  drank  to  Aunt 
Mary  along  with  the  bride  and  groom,  and  Mitchell 


320    REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

made  a  speech,  invoking  Heaven's  blessings  on  the 
triple  compact  and  covering  himself  with  glory. 

"  Here's  to  Aunt  Mary  and  her  bride  and  her 
groom,"  he  cried,  when  they  told  him  to  rise  and 
proclaim.  "  Here's  to  Aunt  Mary  and  her  bride 
and  groom,  and  here's  to  their  health  and  their 
wealth  and  their  happiness.  Here's  to  their  bril- 
liant past,  their  roseate  present  and  their  gorgeous 
future.  And  here's  to  hoping  that  Fate,  who  is 
ready  and  willing  to  deal  any  man  a  bride,  may 
some  time  see  fit  to  deal  some  one  of  us  another 
such  as  Jack's  Aunt  Mary.  So  I  propose  her 
health  before  all  else.  Aunt  Mary,  long  may  she 
wave !  " 

Aunt  Mary  looked  as  if  words  and  actions  were 
poor  things  in  which  to  attempt  to  express  her 
feelings,  but  no  one  who  glanced  at  her  could  be  in 
two  minds  as  to  her  state  of  approval  as  to  every- 
thing that  was  going  on. 

The  bridal  pair  drove  away  somewhere  after 
five  o'clock,  and  about  seven  the  main  body  of  the 
guests  returned  to  the  city. 

Mrs.  Rosscott's  mother  and  Mitchell  and  Bur- 
nett remained  a  day  or  two  to  keep  Aunt  Mary 
from  feeling  blue,  but  Aunt  Mary  was  not  at  all 
inclined  that  way. 

"  If  those  two  young  people  are  lookin'  forward 
to  anythin'  like  as  much  fun  as  I  am,"  she  said  over 


GRAND   FINALE  321 

and  over  again,  "  well,  all  is  they're  lookin'  for- 
ward to  a  good  deal." 

"  Won't  we  whoop  her  up  next  summer  I  "  said 
Burnett;  "  well,  I  don't  know!  " 

"  My  dear  Robert,"  said  his  mother  gently. 

"  Don't  stop  him,"  said  Aunt  Mary.  "  He 
knows  just  how  I  feel  an'  I  know  jus'  how  he  feels. 
It  isn't  wrong,  Mrs.  Burnett,  it's  natural.  We  were 
born  to  be  happy,  only  sometimes  we  don't  know 
just  how  to  set  about  it." 

"  Miss  Watkins  has  hit  the  nail  on  the  head," 
said  Mitchell,  rolling  a  cigarette.  "  She  has  not 
only  hit  the  nail  on  its  own  head,  but  she  has  suc- 
ceeded in  driving  its  point  well  into  all  our  heads. 
She  taught  us  many  things  during  her  short  visit. 
I,  for  one,  am  her  debtor  forever.  Me  for  joy, 
from  now  on  I  " 

Aunt  Mary  smiled.  "  My  heavens!  "  she  mur- 
mured; "  to  think  how  nice  it  all  come  out,  and 
how  really  put  out  I  was  when  Jack  first  began, 
too." 

Burnett  put  his  hand  in  his  pocket  and  pulled  out 
some  gum. 

"  Robert!  "  cried  his  mother,  "  you  don't  chew 
gum,  do  you?  " 

"  Of  course  he  doesn't,"  said  his  friend  quickly; 
"  that's  why  he  had  it  in  his  pocket." 

Aunt  Mary  looked  thoughtfully  at  him. 


REJUVENATION   OF   AUNT   MARY 

"  Give  me  a  little,"  she  said,  "  maybe  it's  suthin' 
I've  been  missin'." 

Mrs.  Burnett  left  the  next  day,  and  Mitchell 
went  the  day  after. 

The  carpenters  took  down  the  addition,  and  the 
wedding  presents  were  shipped  to  town. 

"  She  says  she'll  be  goin'  soon,"  said  Lucinda  to 
Joshua. 

*'  Then  she'll  be  goin'  soon,"  said  Joshua. 

"I'm  sure  I'll  be  glad,"  said  Lucinda;  "such 
hifalutin  sky-larkin'  1  " 

Joshua  said  nothing.  Mr.  Stebbins  had  apprised 
him  of  Aunt  Mary's  arrangements  in  his  behalf  and 
he  felt  no  inclination  to  criticize  any  of  her  doings 
and  sayings. 

Toward  the  end  of  the  next  week  this  telegram 
was  received. 

Dear  Aunt  Mary:  We're  home  and  ready  when 
you  are.  Telegraph  what  train. 

J.andJ. 

The  telegram  was  handed  to  Aunt  Mary  at  ten 
in  the  morning.  Her  fingers  trembled  as  she 
opened  it. 

"  My  heavens  alive,  Lucinda,"  she  cried,  the 
next  minute,  "  I  do  believe,  if  you'll  be  quick,  that 
I  can  make  the  twelve-twenty !  Run !  Tell  Joshua 
to  get  my  trunk  down  and  harness  Billy  as  quick 


GRAND   FINALE  323 

as  he  can.  He  can  telegraph  that  I'm  comin'  after 
I'm  gone." 

Lucinda  flew  Joshua-wards. 

"  She  wants  to  make  the  twelve-twenty  train  1  " 
she  cried.  Joshua  looked  up. 

"  Then  she'll  make  it,"  he  said. 

She  made  itl 


An  International  Love  Comedy 


A  WOMAN'S  WILL 


By  ANNE   WARNER 
Author  of  "  Susan  Clegg  and  Her  Friend  Mrs.  Lathrop" 

Illustrated.     360  pages.     12mo.     $1.50 

The  Baltimore  Herald  says  : 

"This  story  is  of  the  kind  which  makes  staid,  married 
maturity  revert  to  its  courting  days.  .  .  .  The  hero,  with  his 
temper  and  his  conceptions  and  mis-conceptions  of  the  English 
language,  is  a  character  beside  whom  the  every-day  lover  seems 
prosaic." 

The  St.  Paul  Pioneer  Press  says  : 

"  Of  course  the  heroine  was  cynical  —  naturally  she  was  afraid, 
and  it  goes  without  saying  that  she  vowed  never  to  marry 
again.  She  did,  however, —  but  that  is  the  story.  A  very 
distinct  vein  of  humor  runs  through  the  book,  and  the  dialogue 
is  most  refreshingly  natural.  The  woman  was  true  to  herself 
and  to  her  sex." 

The  Chicago  Record-Herald  says  : 

"There  have  been  many  good  stories  written  around  a 
charmingly  ingenuous  girl,  but  in  this  book  the  effect  of  variety 
and  lovable  allure  belongs  to  the  man.  The  story  is  jolly 
reading." 

The  New  York  Times  says  : 
"  There  is  a  laugh  on  nearly  every  page." 

The  Chicago  Tribune  says  : 
"A  deliciously  funny  book." 


A  Masterpiece  of  Native  Humor 


SUSAN  CLEGG  AND  HER 
FRIEND  MRS.  LATHROP 


By  ANNE  WARNER 
Author  of  "  A  Woman's  Will,"  etc. 

With  Frontispiece.     227  pages.     12mo.     $1.00. 

IT  is  seldom  a  book  so  full  of  delightful  humor  comes 
before  the  reader.    Anne  "Warner  takes  her  place  in  the 
circle  of  American  woman  humorists,  who  have  achieved 
distinction  so  rapidly  within  recent  years. — Brooklyn  Eagle. 

Nothing  better  in  the  new  homely  philosophy  style  of 
fiction  has  been  written. — San  Francisco  Bulletin. 

Anne  Warner  has  given  us  the  rare  delight  of  a  book 
that  is  extremely  funny.  Hearty  laughter  is  in  store  for 
every  reader. — Philadelphia  Public  Ledger. 

Susan  is  a  positive  contribution  to  the  American  char- 
acters in  fiction. — Brooklyn  Times. 

Susan  Clegg  is  a  living  creature,  quite  as  amusing  and 
even  more  plausible  than  Mrs.  Wiggs.  Susan's  human 
weaknesses  are  endearing,  and  we  find  ourselves  in  sym- 
pathy with  her. — New  York  Evening  Post. 

No  more  original  or  quaint?  person  than  she  has  ever 
lived  in  fiction.— Newark  Advertiser. 


LITTLE,  BROWN,  &  CO.,  PUBIJSHKRS,  BOSTON 

At  all  Booksellers' 


Another  Popular  "  Susan  Clegg  "  Book 


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All  the  stories  brim  over  with  quaint  humor,  caustic 
sarcasm,  and  concealed  contempt  for  male  folk  and  matri- 
monial chains.  —  Philadelphia  Ledger. 

Anything  more  humorous  than  the  "  Susan  Clegg  "  stories 
would  be  hard  to  find.  —  Jeannette  L.  Gilder,  Editor  of 
Putnam's  Magazine. 

The  best  work  that  Anne  Warner  has  published.  Miss 
Clegg  has  become  an  institution  in  the  humor  of  America. 
—  Baltimore  Sun. 

Her  "  Susan  Clegg  "  stories,  rich  in  pungent  humor  and 
extremely  clever  in  their  portrayal  of  quaint  and  amusing 
character,  deserve  a  place  among  the  choice  specimens  of 
American  humorous  literature  —  which  means  the  best 
humorous  literature  in  the  world.  —  New  York  Times. 

Sure  to  be  welcomed  by  that  large  class  of  readers  who 
found  in  "  Susan  Clegg  and  Her  Friend  Mrs.  Lathrop  "  one 
of  the  most  genuinely  humorous  books  ever  written  by  a 
woman  on  this  side  of  the  Atlantic.  —  St.  Louis  Globe- 
Democrat. 


LITTLE,  BROWN,  &   CO.,  PUBLISHERS 
254  WASHINGTON  STREET,  BOSTON 


A  Delightful  New  Blue  Grass  Country  Character 


By  ELIZA   CALVERT   HALL 
Illustrated  by  Beulah  Strong.     12mo.     Cloth,  §1.50 


This  book,  a  picture  of  rural  Kentucky  life,  will  evoke 
the  deepest  sympathy  from  every  human  heart  with 
which  its  characters  come  in  contact.  Aunt  Jane  is  a 
philosopher  in  homespun  and  in  her  "  ricollections  "  we 
see  the  beauty,  the  romance,  and  the  pathos  that  lie  in 
humble  lives. 

The  humor  of  the  book  is  softened  and  refined  by  being 
linked  with  pathos  and  romance,  and  the  character  draw- 
ing is  done  with  a  firm  hand.  Nancy  Huston  Banks, 
the  well  known  author,  says  it  is  "  a  faithful  portrayal  of 
provincial  life  in  Kentucky,  but  something  more  than 
that  too ;  for  the  universal  note  which  marks  the  value  of  all 
creative  toriling  sounds  on  every  page." 

Every  one  is  sure  to  love  Aunt  Jane  and  her  neighbors, 
her  quilts  and  her  flowers,  her  stories  and  her  quaint, 
tender  philosophy. 


LITTLE,  BROWN,  &   CO.,  PUBLISHERS 
254  WASHINGTON  STREET,  BOSTON 


A     000058186 


